SET FIRE TO THE RAIN
by Mccull
Summary: The very first, all original Ferriswheelshipping VS triadshipping story. Join Touko while she struggles to pick between the innocent and abused Lord N, and the regretful former shadow triad member Tate.
1. Chapter 1

"We… we… lost…"

In all his eighteen year old glory, he bent beside his Zoroark and tears streamed from his eyes.

I barely noticed. Because in my limp arms was my Mienshao, her lithe body mangled and gushing. The room was spinning from my horror and the smell of blood. She was such a fighter… everything I could ever ask for in a pokemon companion… and she was gone.

Not even the safety of the pokeball could have saved her. The red line of light refused to absorb her back into its secure barriers. And so I collapsed next to her screaming and hiccupping and sobbing like there was no tomorrow. I held her limp in my arms and buried my face into her blood soaked fur. She was already cold, and her flesh was sagging from her broken bones.

I tried to tell myself that she wasn't suffering anymore… that she wasn't going to be in pain or have to fight again. I tried to tell myself she would be happy wherever she may be… but it all just came crashing done on me.

It didn't even matter that she had used her last, dying breath to save all of Unova. She was gone and nothing… not even to stop the liberation was worth it.

Zoroark was sucked back into his pokeball with shaky hands as the boy of my most recent nightmares approached me. His face was wet with sorrow and as he bent at me side I realize I couldn't take my eyes off his. That or I just couldn't look at Mienshao's body any longer.

"Tou—Touko I'm… so—sorry." The grief in his eyes was real as he extended his hand outward tours my pokemons lifeless corpse.

I wretched away from him and let my legs slide out from under me. I curled up into a ball, probably looking more like a wild pokemon gorging on a piece of meat, opposed to a trainer sobbing for her lost companion.

"This… wasn't sup—supposed to hap—happen." He choked, pulling his hat off to reveal the dirty tea green hair that was sticking to his face.

Again he tried to reach out to my pokemon. Some magnetic pull was coming over him and that was it, he just had to touch her.

This time I didn't try to move out of the way. Instead, I unwrapped my blood stained arms from her body and shoved up, fighting to stay on my knees. I gritted my teeth together and looked him in the eyes…

N…

All the energy I could have possibly summoned in my muscles flashed for a second, the anger and adrenalin making me wild. I drew my hand back, making the tightest fist I could have managed. His grief filled eyes grew wide, but no amount of time would have been enough.

I punched him.

I punched him as hard as I could manage and he just took it, more tears flowing from his eyes down his dirty face. I stopped and waited for him to look up at me once more, a thick red blotch on his cheek.

"What's wrong with you!" I rasped and tried to punch him again. It fell short though and I turned my attention back to my pokemon.

"I… I don't… I…"

"N!" Ghetsis' booming voice roared. I didn't move, I couldn't gather myself together. Not even enough to spit in Ghetsis face like I vowed I would the next time I saw him.

"Mienshao…" I whimpered, not looking up.

"YOU LOST?"

N stood up immediately.

"YOU CALL YOURSELF A HERO? YOU DARE USE THE NAME HARMONIA!"

I tried to scramble away from the voice. I tried… without success to drag myself and my pokemon's body to the little bit of flat ground that wasn't covered in crushed bricks and fallen pillars.

"YOU COULDN'T EVEN BEAT AN AVERAGE TRAINER AND YOU THINK YOU ARE GOING TO BE KING!" he roared.

I had to look up them, to see the worse father on this planet slap his son across the face. I flinched and somehow wondered if this was all really N's fault.

Again… much like when I punched him, he just took it. But getting punched by someone whose pokemon you just murdered in battle… and getting slapped by your father, were two different things.

I didn't know what to think, I was convulsing, my body shaking and trembling and silently begging to get me out of here.

"I'll fight her myself. She is nothing but a little bitch. Watch and see just what it takes to be a king." Ghetsis turned and walked over to me, seeing the fetal position I was in and took advantage of it. He lifted his huge foot and struck me right in the side.

I whimpered and moaned and cried and ached in every way possible. Clutching Mienshao, still, like if I wouldn't let her go I would somehow be able to bring her back.

N was silently rubbing his cheek.

"GET UP AND FIGHT ME!" Ghetsis demanded, raising his leg to kick me again.

"STOP!" Cheren's rage filled voice suddenly filled the area and I caught sight of him dashing over, clutching his pokeball in his hand. He put himself right between me and Ghetsis, holding his arms out and snarling. "Fight me!"

Everything was spinning…

"Cheren… you mustn't do this." Alder's sturdy voice came then, but I couldn't find him anywhere. Everything was turning black. Colored fuzzy spots, tattered my vision and I thought it might make me vomit.

"Why not? We can't let them win!" Cheren argued.

"They already have." Alder's footsteps approached me and I could barely make out his boots two feet in front of me. "It's not worth it…"

"What!"

"Look at that!" Alder snapped. I could feel the stares turn to me and Mienshao's corpse. "This is all that's come of this!"

"I'm not giving up!"

"We surrender, Ghetsis…" Alder spoke anyways. "We will back away quietly now…"

Ghetsis scoffed… it was obvious he didn't believe anything that had just happened.

"NO!" Cheren through his pokeball and out came Servine from the sound of it.

"STOP!" Alder ordered.

Ghetsis's booming laugh shook the walls and my breath was growing shallower.

"Foolish!" He snarled and released a pokemon of his own. I didn't recognize the sound it made… I was losing it.

"I'm not giving up!" Cheren screamed.

"PLEASE!" N begged now. His voice sounded much closer to me than I expected. My eyes flickered open for a split second to see traumatized green eyes looking down at me. Or was he looking at Mienshao?

My stomach churned and my eyes lolled. Before I knew it everything was gone.


	2. Chapter 2

"Mien! Mienshao!"

I laughed. "Very good! Now try again!"

My pokemon obeyed, swinging her thick arms around and springing from the ground into the air. She twisted and struck out with both legs. The huge tree trembled at the large dents and gashed in it proved just how strong she was getting.

"That's great!" I cheered.

She did it once more, this time managing to make an acorn fall. It struck the ground next to me and I jumped with surprise. Dewott raced around from the other side of the tree and grabbed it quickly. He took the shells from his hips and started smashing the thing into pieces.

"It's not an oyster!" I rolled over onto my stomach and stretched out to take it from him. He looked down at me confused and a shower of two or three more fell from the tree. Mienshao jumped over, holding an armful of acorns and dropping them in front of us.

"We can't do anything with these guys." I crossed my ankles in the air and twirled the half smashed acorn around in my fingers.

Mienshao curled up next to me and Dewott started smashing into the other ones she had collected from the tree.

I had closed my eyes and rolled onto my back, enjoying the sun as it hit my face in gentle dapples. I wasn't sure how long I lay like that before a voice caught my attention.

"Touko! There you are!" Bianca gasped for air as she stopped in front of me. Her pudgy, fourteen year old body hadn't developed yet and she took a huge whiff of her inhaler before bending down to grasp my arm. She hauled me up and started dragging me back tours the city. "Something's happening!" she wheezed.

"Deep breaths Bianca." I said soothingly, knowing that her asthma was never as bad as it seemed. I fallowed her quickly, glancing back only once in a while to make sure Dewott and Mienshao were following me.

"I'm ok!" She coughed and started to slow as we ran through the city gates and gazed around. Cheren stood at the back of a crowd, tapping his foot impatiently, his arms crossed.

I went over to hear what was going on.

"Liberation!" A deep voice rumbled around the watching people. Everyone was on their toes trying to overlook the other people on their toes, so I couldn't see anything.

"Liberation!" It repeated again. "That's what this region needs!"

I was shoving my way through the crowd to try and get a better look. Mienshao followed faithfully. I stopped though, bumping into a very tall figure.

"N!" I gasped, and suddenly everything was lacking sense. The crowd started to fade, literally, fading into the oblivion. Everyone was invisible now, no Bianca, no Cheren, no one but Ghetsis, roaring on about pokemon liberation. And N was there… looking down at me with blazing eyes.

"Trust me." He hissed.

"NO!" I backed away, my foot bumping into my pokemon.

"Mien…"

I looked down with horror and saw my pokemon starting to melt. Her face sagged and her arms were deforming into a puddle of goo.

"Mienshao!" I wailed, glancing back up from her to N. He was so evil…

"Trust me Touko."

I felt tears swelling in my eyes and I looked around frantically for Dewott. He was gone, invisible with the rest of them. Mienshao sounded muffled as she moaned for help. A heavy gurgling in her throat made me gasp and I bent at her side. I tried to reach out to her, to pick her up and hold her from melting away anymore, but her body just slipped through my hands like pudding.

"Touko…"

Tears streamed and everything started to grow black again.

"Touko!"

Mienshao was nothing but a puddle.

"Touko!"

I shot up like a jack in the box, my heart racing and my face felt wet. I blinked, trying to get my bearings. I was somewhere I didn't know, somewhere that had golden lined walls and fountains in the shape of Swanna, spitting streams of water into huge fountains lined with mirrors. I fallowed the contour of the room and saw the door, huge, heavy, maybe too big to push open, maybe not. There were stained glass windows at the top of it, reflecting nothing but the light from the chandelier above me. It was huge, golden, and had little blue encrusted jewels along the ends. I squinted in confusion.

"Touko?"

I looked to my left in shock, finding N across the room, standing behind a royal blue couch with his hands gripping the metal back tightly. He looked terrified, and suddenly it all came back to me.

"You!" I shot up, running over to him. My hands were curled up into fists already, but I was too dumbfounded to think rationally.

He maneuvered around the couch, keeping it constantly between us as I perused war on his ass.

"Where am I! I demand you tell me!" I shouted, jumping over the back of the couch and landing right in his path. We bumped into each other and he whipped back around, grabbing a throw pillow and holding it up like it would protect him.

"In Team Plasma's Castle…" he finally muttered.

"WHAT?" I grabbed the pillow he clutched and ripped it from his hands. I threw it out of the way and stormed tours him as he backed up. "HOW DARE YOU!"

"Touko… stop!" He held his hands up to me, trying to keep me calm.

I reached for my pokeballs and found them missing. I wanted so badly to punch something… or more likely punch him. "Where are my pokemon!"

Speaking of which…

I looked down at myself now and saw that I was wearing a long gown, dark gray and thick. It had two strings coming out from the hood and they had little gold caplets on the end of them. I looked down and saw that on the front of the ugly thing was the letter P.

"Is this some kind of sick joke!" I jumped forward to crush N's head between my hands, but he moved away too quickly. He ran around to the other side of the couch once more and I just stayed put, folding my arms and glaring at him.

"Just listen…" he bit his lip. "Please?"

"NO! Why am I here! Where are my pokemon!"

"You passed out… that night…" he swallowed.

"When?" I cocked my head to the side, trying to remember.

"The night you battled Me." he shuffled awkwardly.

It all came flooding back. The horror of Reshiram and Zekrom battling for their ideals struck me like a lighting bolt. I looked up at N, all the anger fading as I remembered very clearly the way Ghetsis had slapped him, and kicked me. I blinked, trying to remember something else…

Cheren had been there… he tried to defend me. But Alder had surrendered for all of us… as if Ghetsis could have beaten all the gym leaders and Cheren alone. Why had Alder given in? I didn't understand… but something else didn't come to me either.

"I… I beat you…" I assumed, though I couldn't remember ever ending the battle. All I could see was fighting in the back of my mind. Fighting and lighting and fire and blasting holes through the huge pillars and walls.

I shivered.

"Yeah…" N couldn't look me in the eyes.

"So if I beat you why am I here? Where are my pokemon!" I grew furious once again. "I won! I'm the hero of Unova and you… you lost! You're nothing but a loser and a cheater!"

He flinched. "No…"

"YES!" I snarled and turned my back on him. I wasn't sure what I was going to do with myself, but I figured it wouldn't make a difference either way. I headed towards the huge shining door and tried to push it open. It was solid though, and wouldn't move.

"It's locked."

"No really?" I bit back sarcastically. "Let me out now!"

"I can't." He didn't move from behind his couch shelter, though he clutched the back again and leaned forward slightly. "I will explain everything to you… if you will just listen."

"Or you could just let me go now and save your sorry ass from being kicked!" I was fuming, and then it came back to me. The thing I was trying to remember about the battle.

I had beat N, yes, but I had lost my very first pokemon in the end. It wasn't worth it.

Agony gripped my chest once more and I realized that dream of Mienshao melting away before me was just the beginning of many, many nightmares to come.

"I'm the king of Team Plasma… I'm Prince of Ghetsis Harmonia, and I can't let you go…"

I sunk to the floor and trembled terribly, my eyes pouring and my shoulders hunched forward. "You… you killed my… my Mienshao…"

"No…" N whispered and shook his head from across the room. "I didn't…"

"Your Zoroark killed her!" I covered my face and held back the worst of my sobbing. "Let me out! Give me my pokemon back and let me out of this god forsaken place!"

"I can't… I couldn't even if I wanted to."

"WHY?"

"Touko you… you beat me and now we have you under control… so nothing will stop us now."

I scratched my nails along the marble floor and felt hopeless. "You're nothing but a cheater. You don't deserve to be alive! You should have died before my Mienshao!"

He flinched again and this time couldn't stop himself from tearing up. "I'm sorry."

I wondered how many eighteen year olds—almost full grown men—would let a girl like me hurt their feelings. I didn't care though, despite the way his tears made me feel.

I wasn't the emotional type, I was a fighter, and a pokemon trainer doesn't let the world get her down. But losing a pokemon, especially one as special to me as Mienshao… that just threw me off course.

N sniffed and rubbed his arm across his face. He rolled up the black sleeves of his turtleneck and took a deep breath before speaking again.

"Ghetsis says I'm not meant to be king… But he can't change that now, he made me king and plasma follows my orders just as much as they follow his and the other sages… And I've been ordered to… well… order plasma to keep liberating."

There was something more vital in my heart than just the fact that Team Plasma was still liberating under their rulers word… but it was the fact that N was leading it after losing to me.

Never before had I thought he would be the type to go back on his word. Despite the plans and actions and terrible things team plasma had done… N just didn't seem like the type to do such a thing.

"I'm sorry… I know you won the battle fair and square but… but you just can't expect it to stop all of the sudden…" N couldn't look me in the eyes. "We have to keep you here…so you don't tamper with our plans." He spoke critically.

"You disgust me."

"It won't be so bad…" he sighed. "We can make it normal here… You won't live a terrible life."

"Terrible! N, you don't get it do you! As long as I'm here, as long as I can't do anything to stop your immoral plans, as long as I have to be near you or your FATHER." I hissed the word. "It will be much more than terrible. You might as well kill me like you did my pokemon!"

"I would never kill you!" He defended himself. "And it was an accident! Zoroark doesn't know its own power…"

"An accident! No, N! An accident is when you spill milk at dinner, not when your scourge of a pokemon murders another of its kind!"

His lower lip pouted out slightly and he ground his teeth together to hold back the emotion in his eyes. I wasn't sure what he was thinking but it wasn't helping. He wiped his arm across his face once more and then looked up to me.

"This is just the way it has to be." He spoke too softly, too innocently. Didn't he realize what he was doing was wrong?

If that bruise on his face didn't give me my answer I wasn't sure what did.

"This whole floor of the castle is yours, don't try to escape because you will just set off alarms and it would be more trouble than its worth."

"Are you kidding me?"

"No." he didn't understand the sarcasm. "This floor has a wash room, a play room, and your bedroom." He looked around the royal blue and gold trimmed room with a sigh. "Its not the most luxurious we have but it will have to do."

I gave him a look of disbelief.

"And the elevators won't work without a specific code… so don't try those either." He mused.

I felt a terrible sinking feeling in my stomach.

"We will provide food and outings if necessary."

"Food? What do you mean if?" I snorted.

"Well… I will have someone bring you food." He shook his head and shut his eyes.

"I hate you so much." I sighed.

He looked hurt. "Right… You and the rest of the region." And without another word he turned, heading past the huge blue bed that I realized I had been sleeping in, and to a small clear staircase. It was a small spiral and I couldn't see where it went after it reached the next floor. There was a door in the way; it kind of reminded me of a submarine door but it was clear and light was radiating in from above.

I watched N go in surprise. What was I supposed to do now? I pulled my feet around to be in front of me, my back pressed up against the huge door and I just sat there. I hugged my knees trying to think of a way to escape and not about where my pokemon may be or my beloved Mienshao. That just hurt too much…

I thought about Samorott instead and hoped he was leading the rest of the group well… if they were all together that is. My Unfezant would be terrified and acting out because of it. It took him a long time to get used to people, and that was when I was around him. Without me, I doubted he could be social at all.

Reuniclus would be scared, frequently using her physic abilities to try and figure something out. She had the mind capacity of a high end computer, and I didn't think there was a puzzle she couldn't figure out. Which lead me to believe that if there was a way to escape she would figure it out.

This made me feel a little better. With her brains, Samorott's leadership, and Unfezant's caution they could figure it out.

My Scrafty… who was so in love with Mienshao, would either be more furious than ever if he knew what happened to her, or he wouldn't know yet and be determined to find out.

Either way Scrafty was powerful and had all the brute strength he could possibly need to tear his way out of this place.

I wasn't sure what Eelektross would do. He was newest to the group… but for sure a loyal addition. I didn't doubt any of them. They would find there was back to me… Or better, I would find my way back to them first.

Motivated I got to my feet and started scoping out the room. It was pretty huge and that alone frightened me. The huge ceiling only came down to normal height on the half of the room with the staircase that twirled up through the next floor. It was still a high ceiling, but not as high as the other side. I noticed that somewhere from the floor above me it stopped, and I could see a railing were you could have potentially fallen off of.

Pouring out from between the railing was water, silky looking, bright blue water that poured down a stone wall into the fountain down on my floor. It was like these two rooms where connected by the water and staircase.

I realized as I walked around examining the room that I didn't have shoes on. Someone had taken my boots? I scowled and felt the large fluffy rug that covered most of the marble floor between my toes. Too soft… like that huge bed. It was too big; the staircase was too dramatic. This was all just too much for me to take in. The waterfall and the chandelier and the enormous door that I wasn't sure how to open…

Everything here made me feel small.

N had said that there was a bathroom somewhere on this floor, and a… playroom? I shivered, wondering if it was like his former bedroom in this castle…

I didn't understand N, he was every bit as much a child as he was a king. And it bothered me to know someone's heart could be so pure and yet so… destructive.

Maybe that was all just an act though. Maybe N was truly just a mastermind, with better acting abilities than Bianca. And that was saying something…

The more I wanted to believe I was being tricked though, the harder it got to believe. N's tears before… the complete and utter shock of losing to me in battle, the fear in his eyes when Ghetsis had appeared to him, even the way he seemed to be hurt by my words before… it was all real.

N was really more like a pokemon himself than a human. And he was certainly more child than man. Still letting his daddy tell him what to do…

I scoffed and rolled my eyes, looking up to the huge door once more. I examined it carefully and saw that there actually was a handle. Even if the handle was the length of my forearm, it was still a working handle.

I reached up and twisted the lock, grabbed it securely, and pulled with all my strength to get the huge door to creak open. It came towards me, moving faster once it got momentum. I narrowly avoided it crushing my bare toes against the marble. I flinched at the thought before venturing out.

Plasma members flooded the short hallway that was much different that I expected it. It was nothing compared to the huge room they put me in. My "Bedroom" I groaned. Not for long.

Plasma was running around in a mass of work uniforms, a flood of gray and light blue hoods bobbed up and down, carrying trays of food, boxes and to my horror, trainer belts with the pokeballs still attached to them. My stomach flipped and I wanted so badly to believe that any of those sets of six could be my bunch…

Would Mienshao's pokeball be on my belt still though? I pushed the thought away again. If I didn't think about her… and how much it hurt, maybe I could just forget it happened and go on believing that she was alive and healthy with the rest of my team.

I knew it was a stupid idea… but it was all I had.

I walked out, feeling very odd and different compared to these mechanical workers. No one paid much attention to me but I could see by how short the hall was, and by how narrow the elevators opened and how quickly they closed that this was a prison hallway.

A very, very beautiful prison… but a prison just the same. I sighed and felt uncomfortable around so many grunts. None of them seemed to realize who I was, that or they didn't have enough common sense to realize that I could have been one of them. I eyed the elevator and considered pulling up my hood and blending in even more. Maybe if they didn't realize who I was I could just ride the elevator down with someone and then figure it out from there.

I considered it, and even reached to grab my hood and pull it up when someone bumped into me.

"Watch it!" she barked.

I flooded a cherry red when all the eyes turned to me. I stood in panic and wasn't sure if they would let me run back to the room in peace. Probably not…

I swallowed hard and someone made an annoyed sound. They all realized who I was then, and I didn't miss the flash of fear in their eyes, but they turned and went back to work before it could stick.

No one said anything as I shuffled along the wall back to the huge room. I would have to wait until there was less grunts around to explore and try and find my way out. Anger pulsed through me as I thought of what Cheren and Bianca would be doing right now…

Cheren—if he knew I was captured—would be planning my escape. I had to believe he did know what was going on, after all he had been there that night when I passed out. This made me realize that he must have lost to Ghetsis… the last thing I remembered was his calling out his Servine. It wasn't enough…

I hadn't seen Bianca in about a week, even before that night. She would be fighting back tears and sucking on her inhaler for much needed air if she knew. She didn't handle well under pressure, and I always assumed her asthma was wired to her tear ducts. It was a very thin line she had to cross to get herself all worked up again.

I hoped Cheren would take care of her and tell her to breathe slowly and calm down while I wasn't there… She needed the reassurance and motivation to get past her flaws. Her parents wouldn't give her any motivation… sure they would tell her to calm down and breathe easy, but they would love to strap her down to her bed and just keep her there for the rest of her life if they could.

Even if Cheren couldn't help Bianca though… he was smart; probably the smartest guy I knew, he would figure something out if I couldn't.

I wondered how long I had been here. I felt like I had slept for a very long time before I woke up from that terrible dream. Judging by the sun out the huge windows, facing nothing but forest, I figured it must be about twilight. I wasn't tired at all though. I had just practically gone into a coma and woke up. Sleep didn't sound the least bit appealing.

Some strange noise from the floor above me sounded and I headed to the staircase. I assumed I could go up it because it was part of my floor too. Was N up there?

I stopped about halfway to the weird submarine door and looked up, trying to see anything through the bubble like feeling it had. The only thing though was the deformed shape of another chandelier and more ceiling.

I was going to knock on the door but when I thought about it I realized I would just get more upset. Whoever was up there—N or not—wasn't going to make me feel better. In fact all I could see coming out of it was bad. Making a fool out of myself and probably digging a deeper hole in this beautiful, golden wrapped hell.

I missed my bedroom… I missed my simple full size bed and prehistoric computer that took forever to load. I missed my mother and her sweet smile, my friends, my neighborhood and the pokemon lab I worked at with Cheren on Sundays before we went on our journey. I hoped Professor Juniper was ok without me, and then thought better of it. She would be fine. She had been fine without me and Cheren for the whole time we journeyed.

But more than anything I missed my pokemon. My heart lurched when I walked right into the trap of thinking about Mienshao, and I couldn't help but curl up in the bottom step of the staircase. I hugged my knees to my chest and put my face against the cool glass.

I knew this couldn't last… someone would save me. Someone would arrest Ghetsis and N for running all this craziness and then team plasma would have to split up. Without a leader they were nothing. There had to be other strong trainers to stop them.

My pokemon would get out… they could handle themselves, they would stick together and everyone would be safe and sound. We would be together soon enough.

I told myself this… but I knew deep down I didn't believe it.


	3. Chapter 3

The faintest thud woke me the next morning, or afternoon… I wasn't sure.

I rolled over, expecting for my feet to fall off the edge of my bed and hit the floor, but they didn't. I rolled again. Nothing. I opened my eyes then in confusion.  
I sighed, having forgotten all about this giant bed in this giant hell I was stuck in. I ignored the faint noise from the hallway outside my room and tried to remember last night. I couldn't think of when I fell asleep after crying for so long, all I know is that I hadn't gotten into bed. I had been on the cold tile floor. Never before in my life had I slept walked, so I knew someone had deliberately moved me.

I sat up, pushing back all those disturbing thoughts that had kept me restless all night long. I didn't remember waking up in the night, but I felt even tired now than I had before.

With a yawn I looked over to the other side of the huge bed. It was still neatly made because I was used to sleeping in minimal space, and sitting at the foot of it was a tray of food. My stomach snarled.

Fresh fruit sat next to a bowl of yogurt and there was a very large glass of milk that I was afraid I would knock over if I tried to grab it with one hand. I reached for a piece of fruit and bit into its succulent flesh with ease.

Some sense of relief came over me and I hoped that wherever my pokemon may be, they were getting the same kind of treatment. If we were going to be held as prisoners, at least we were treated like royal prisoners.

I was so enthralled with how delicious this food tasted, and how hungry I was, that I didn't hear the strange bubble door in the low part of the ceiling open. I was shoveling yogurt into my mouth when I spotted N walking down the staircase.

I set the spoon down and wondered what he was doing, though I didn't speak. I just watched as he turned gracefully down the steps and came out facing me, his shoes making no noise on the plush rug.

He stopped to stare at me, some strange content in his eyes. He blinked once and then took a deep breath. "How is everything?"

I cleared my throat and looked down at my half eaten breakfast. I wasn't sure what to say, to be honest I could barely remember the conversations we had yesterday. I had been so upset and angry I hadn't stopped to think about what I was saying. Whatever it was though, it must have really worked. The confident, liberating king I once knew was keeping his distance.

"Well if I had my pokemon and my freedom… things would be pretty nice." I suggested in a weak voice. This seemed to give him courage, he stepped tours me and stopped at the end of the bed.

"Do you always cry in your sleep?"

I was startled by the question, and I wasn't sure how to answer so I just took another bite out of the fruit.

"I'm sorry." He repeated. "I know you think I'm terrible and… maybe I am. But I'm not trying to make this any harder for you than it needs to be."

"Just go away." I finally spoke, wishing he wasn't making me uncomfortable. "You're distracting me from thinking of ways to escape."

He scowled. "I thought you were supposed to get forgiveness when you apologize."

Again he surprised me. "Well when you apologize you have to mean it, otherwise it isn't a good apology."

"You think I don't mean that?" He looked hurt again. I was really starting to hate the way he pouted… like a child.

"If you meant it, you would give me my pokemon back and set me free." My voice was raw. I took a swig of the milk to try and bring back the stability, but it was really sweet. I set the glass down and curled my lip in distaste. Not everything here had to be riche.

"But I can't." N made a movement to sit on the end of the bed.

I shook my head and he stopped himself, his face falling. He ran a hand through his hair nervously and bit his lower lip.

"I'm supposed to take care of you." He said after I had broken the silence with the sound of the spoon clinking against the bowl. I scraped the last bit of yogurt out and licked the spoon greedily.

"You?" I gave him a sour look. I wasn't sure what was worse… the idea of someone who couldn't take care of himself trying to take care of me, or the fact that his pokemon killed my Mienshao. Either way I loathed the idea.

"Its punishment…" he played with his fingers nervously. "For not beating you in battle…"

"Well I don't want you anywhere near me so you can forget about that punishment." I gnawed on a piece of fruit. I didn't know what it was and after tasting its rough skin and gritty insides I set it down.

"Why do you hate me so much?" He frowned. "You never hated me so much before…"

"Before what, N?" I demanded. "Before your Zoroark murdered my Mienshao?"

"It was an accident…"

"Yeah well… accident or not she is gone and it's all your fault."

He took another deep breath and then nodded in understanding. He swallowed his sadness and turned then. "I know." He walked back over to the staircase. "But I'm not allowed to let you take care of yourself. That's why they moved my room above yours." He looked up at the submarine door and frowned.

"That's your room up there?" I was glad I had stopped myself from going in their yesterday.

He nodded. "Yeah, if you need anything, I'll be up there."

Without another word he started climbing back up the stairs. I watched him go and shook my head. He was so strange… Everything about him was just weird. Everything from the way he talked to the green hair.

I slid off the end of the bed and decided to go back out into the hall and see if I could find the bathroom. I wasn't sure if any of these plasma grunts were human, or if N was human either, but I figured they would need a dose of cleanliness every now and again. I know it did.

The hall was less crowded this time, and I really got a good look around. More pillars, less gold and blue, and a lot more white. It wasn't ugly without the grunts running around, and the big window at the other end of it gave in some nice light. I decided I should go left because there was only one door to the right of my bedroom.

Hesitantly I opened the door and peeked in. It was just an old storage closet full of buckets and mops. I backed out and walked to the next door. This one was slightly larger and I had to brace myself for its weight when it swung out.

To my relief it was the bathroom, with a very large shower and bathtub. The faucets were gold and the towels were royal blue. I guess that's just the theme here.

I shut the door and locked its huge bolt before looking at myself in the tall mirror. My face was pale and my eyes were duller than normal. My hair was greasy from not being washed in a few days and I was surprised not to see myself in my normal tight fitting clothes. I couldn't get used to the shapeless plasma sack someone put me in.

I got undressed quickly and looked at myself again. Without the dull clothes I looked a little more like me, but it was only the me I ever saw in the mirror. Despite a few flaws I realized that I was still somehow the same person I was a few days ago, before my life had gone to hell.

I turned to examine the dark purple bruises along my side. I never noticed being in physical pain since I got here, but it sure hurt to look at. I knew now that the next time I saw Ghetsis I would spit on him like I wanted to. That is… if I didn't kill him first.

I walked over to the shower and pulled back the door that had strange designs carved into it. It took me a couple minutes to figure out how to turn the shower head, let alone the hot water. So half my time in there I spent clinging to the opposite wall, trying to avoid the cold spray while adjusting the handle with my foot. Eventually I figured it out.

I also figured out that there was a small window, not like the other enormous ones out in the hall and in my room, but a small one above the shower. I saw the latch on it and my fingers itched to reach up and grab it.

What about my pokemon though?

Samorott, Unfezant, Reuniclus, Scrafty, and Eelektross…

I couldn't leave them here to save myself. They had saved me plenty of times in battle… they were my partners.

I decided I wouldn't leave them now whether that window opened or not… I just had to try it. I had to be sure that Plasma and their almighty king had a flaw in their design. It seemed too good to be true, but what better time would I get?

So I stretched up onto my toes and leaned up. My fingertips could barely reach. I looked down for something, anything to give me a boost up. I settled on using the tiny little corner with a built in shelf. It was slippery and I had to steady myself twice before reaching for the latch again.

I was so shocked that it flicked the other way I had to check myself. To make sure I hadn't just woken up from a dream, or was still in one. But this was real. My heart was racing as I pushed outward on the glass and let in the draft from outside. With shaky fingers I pushed it open a little further.

And suddenly an alarm was going off.

I gasped and my foot slipped off the ledge. My head hit the side of the shower and I slid to the floor with groan. A red fire-alarm kind of light was wailing above my head, and to my horror cameras slipped out of the ceiling. Everything turned its attention to me. Banging on the bathroom door I had locked came first and then some serious shouting. I was terrified, and couldn't bring myself to get up off the shower floor to even grab a towel and wrap it around me.

I turned cherry red when the bathroom door sung open and three team plasma members flooded in. I couldn't see much more than their eyes, so I wondered if they were all girls or not. Even if that was the least of my problems. One of them reached over into the shower and grabbed my arms. The hauled me up and forced me to stand.

No one spoke to me as they passed me along and wrapped a towel around my body. I was shivering with fear and wanted to just run, run and never come back. But the hall was full now as they lead my soaking body back to the room I was staying in.

I protested mildly, my heart aching. "Let me go!"

No one would listen or even notice my squirming. I gave up when they threw me back into the room and someone else threw clothes at me. I stumbled to my knees and ground my teeth together. Furious I started punching at the ground, clutching the towel over me with one hand for a little decency, but freaking out.

I felt my knuckles start to bleed from the hard marble before I stopped and felt the pain. Water dripped down around me in a puddle and I felt like everyone in this castle was trying to ruin my life. It just so happened that was true.

I rubbed my raw, bleeding knuckles on the towel I was wrapped in and then grabbed the clothes they had thrown at me. This wasn't the plasma sack at least; it was a pair of jeans, panties, and a sweatshirt. I wondered if they knew what bra's were, but didn't care enough to let it get to me. I had plenty of other things to worry about.

Like how I would escape from this place. I slipped into the clothes with difficulty because I was still wet, and then curled up on the floor, listening to that dreaded alarm. I looked around, growing more upset by the moment. So instead of fighting back and throwing a fit like I wanted to, I saved myself the embarrassment and crawled towards the huge bed.

I paused, wondering if I had the strength to pull myself up into it or not. I was shivering and cold and figured otherwise. So despite all the fighting spirit in me, I crawled underneath its huge frame and curled up against the furthest wall. I wasn't sure what I was doing, but it somehow felt better under there.

The alarm was still going, snarling, barking, and wailing like a lost pokemon looking for its owner. I covered my face and ears and tried to forget all about it. I was thinking of anything I could to stop the terrible noise.

I was home… laying in the front yard tossing acorns at Mienshao and watching her shatter them with her quick movements.

At least… that's where I wanted to be.

"Touko!" N's frantic voice brought me back to reality. I heard the sound of him rushing down the spiral staircase and then saw his feet running back and fourth across the room. "Touko!" He yelled.

"Funny how stupid they really are isn't it?" A hushed voice spoke from next to me. I jumped and hit my head on the bed frame before trying to scramble away from whoever was there.

Lying next to me with wild silver eyes was a teenage boy, his crooked smile showing the faint trace of perfect white teeth and his low eyebrows speculating. I wanted to scream and run away from the beautiful and somehow familiar boy. Where had I seen him before?

He had thick and warm looking hair, despite it being the color of ice. It was all pushed back and reminded me of someone who was running. He smiled warmly at me and I felt my stomach tighten, wondering what to do.

It all happened so fast I couldn't think straight. And then like nothing else he flickered and was gone. I looked around in shock, trying to find the boy. My eyes focused back on N's feet, much closer to the bed now. I held my breath.

"BOY, WHAT HAVE YOU DONE?" Ghetsis' voice rang out past the high firing alarms. I flinched and saw a pair of huge, boulder like feet stomp towards N's much slighter ones.

There was a terrible slap sound. I bit my lower lip and trembled.

Another slap and a whimper.

"WHERE IS SHE!"

"I… I don't know Lord Ghetsis." N whispered.

Another slap, harder this time, much harder.

"FIND HER!"

"Yes—

Another one.

This time I couldn't take it any longer. I crawled forward and hauled myself out on the opposite side of the bed where they stood.

"I'm right here!" I gathered all my courage and faced them. N looked at me with relieved eyes and his face was red with handprints and his lower lip was swelling slightly.

Ghetsis ground his teeth together and shoved N aside. He thundered over to me and grabbed my wet shirt. He yanked me up so that I was standing on my tip toes. I didn't flinch.

"I ought to send you to the guillotine now for trying to escape you bitch." He snarled, his yellowing teeth slightly crooked and his wrinkling face red like his mechanical eye.

Fury pulsed through my veins and I remembered what I promised myself. I hacked up the best amount of spit I could and shot at his feet. If I thought his face was red before it was turning purple now. He roared and shook me harshly, his huge hands gripping the collar.

"Ghetsis!" someone else called from another door. It was another one of the sages, though I didn't know which one. His face looked much older than Ghetsis, and I noticed how his knees trembled with effort.

"Put the girl down." He pointed with a long, crooked finger.

Ghetsis threw me to the side and I had to catch myself on the bed. I gritted my teeth together as he walked back over to N and landed one more blow, just for the fun of it I presumed. I was repulsed. N may be pretty messed up himself but somewhere inside of me I felt absolutely horrible for him.

N… despite all his own beliefs I didn't agree with, wouldn't be the way he is if it wasn't for that man. That so called "father" of his.

"I suggest you stay on this floor so I don't have to see your pathetic face for the rest of the day." Ghetsis hissed at him before turning to the older sage and leaving.

I hadn't realized the alarm was still going off until it actually stopped and left me and N in silence. I stared at the door for a long moment, and then over at N.

He looked so much like a child… A beaten and abused child in a man's body. It made something in me snap when I was looking at him, and tears started to swell in my eyes.

His emerald eyes came up then and he saw me sniveling. My hands gripped the soft fabric of the bed and I had to swallow to steady myself. My throat was dry and I ran a hand through my wet, tangled hair.

N stared at me and waited for my eyes to come back up.

"Why-! N… Why do you… let that happen?" I asked, wiping the moisture from my eyes.

"I can't stop it." He spoke so calmly it was frightening.

"Yes you can! Stand up for yourself!" I dropped to my knees and buried my face into the bed.

"I... I don't know how." I listened as he moved, walking further away from me and sulking up those stairs. I cried into the blanket for a long moment, wishing that he would wake up and realize he was being used. How could be so oblivious?

"He isn't terrible…"

That voice came again and I looked up to see the white haired boy sitting on the bed in front of me.

"Who are you?" I asked in a shaky voice, feeling kind of crazy. I had the feeling I was going crazy and this model of a guy was just my mind playing tricks on me. But the way he smiled… the silver of his eyes, it was too real.

"You don't know?" He scoffed. "I'm offended."

"But I—

And he was gone.

I groaned and shoved my face into the bed.

I was sure now. The only option to all this madness was that I was going crazy. No rational reason could explain why Ghetsis, no matter how horrible, would beat his own son, or why team Plasma believed liberation was the answer, or why I was suddenly talking to a beautiful and flaky boy. I didn't understand why he was so familiar looking either. It was like I had seen those silver eyes somewhere before.


	4. Chapter 4

Quite some time had gone by before I allowed myself to calm down. Night had fallen and I was sitting with my forehead against the huge glass window, watching the headlights of large vehicles crawl up the gravel road to the front of the castle. They were few and far between and every time I wondered if I could time it right to scream loud enough for them to hear as they entered the castle.

Someone had to be an outsider, delivering something, or bringing news from the region. There had to be something worthy of coming to this terrible place for. I kept thinking about how Ghetsis had hit N, and I had a strange sensation coming over me.

He was just too innocent… too pure to fight back. The only thing that could ever connect to him was pokemon and I knew the encouragement I could give would be a waste of breath. N wouldn't listen to me…

Still it felt wrong to leave him with nothing but a cold shoulder. As much as I hated to admit it we were in the same boat. I was being held against my will and N was getting "punished" to take care of me. Things couldn't be that great on his end either.

I closed my eyes and thought back to that wretched battle a few days ago. All my pokemon had fought their hardest. They all had proved more powerful than I could comprehend and I knew I was being irrational to think that my Mienshao was dead simply because of N and his Zoroark.

Mienshao would have fought to the death no matter what pokemon had she had been fighting. It could have been Reshiram and she would have leapt head first into the chance to silence N and his plans. She would have gladly given everything to win that battle.

And that's exactly what she did. She had dove back into the line of fire at Zoroark, throwing one more attack at him as he lashed out once again. They hit a heartbeat before she let her attack go, so the blast was just as much against herself as it was against Zoroark.

They both had fallen, blown back against the castle walls and landing limp. I had run over to her and tried to call her back, I tried to protect her from suffering any longer before I could get her to the pokemon center. But the red beam hadn't done its job.

I had stared blankly for a long moment, not understanding what had just happened. I tried again as tears swelled in my eyes, and again and again until I realized it was too late. Mienshao had died in the fiery blast of hers and Zoroark's combined attack.

I pressed my face to the glass of the window and opened my eyes, trying to get the memory out of my head.

I was about to brace myself for the tears, but a sound stopped me. I looked up at the submarine door, it was closed but the sound was coming through. I looked over to the opening in the ceiling where the water ran down from the next floor and into the huge fountains. It was coming from up there.

Music played slowly at first, then grew louder. I listened in wonder at the piano and its stunning sound. It was deep and gnawing on the strings of my heart. I was almost in tears at the sad sound but it stopped in enough time, leaving me listening… waiting for more.

Silence bothered me more than it should and I rapped my fingers on the window impatiently, trying to imagine the piano was still playing.

It started again a moment later. This time the sound was more humble, brave sounding. A completely different melody than the depressing noise before. I didn't realize I was bobbing my fingers up and down in quick movements, thinking of what it would be like to make such music.

It stopped again, just as I was getting into it. My hand dropped and I waited again. It was much quicker this time. The piano broke the silence loud and proud and I recognized one of my favorite songs in an instant, though I never expected it to be playing here.

Almost like a reflex reaction, like when I was listening to the radio at home I started to sing along. And I couldn't help myself enough to stop. I stood up, feeling motivated and confident as I walked over to the glass staircase. I started climbing quickly, listening to the music as I got closer to its source.

I paused once I got to the bubble-like door and had to ask myself if this was the right thing to do or not. Walking into N's bedroom while he played the piano? I didn't even know he could play… not that I should. I barely knew him at all. But still, my voice was building as I sang along.

I knew every word and it gave me the strength to push open that door. I peeked over the edge, looking across the floor and around the magnificent room. It was just as big as mine, and had the same gold and blue assortment, but there was more detail. Pictures on the walls of pokemon, music thumb-tacked above the bed, that glorious Piano he sat at, facing the wall furthest from me.

There was a small step up that the piano was sitting on, it was like a mini stage just for him and I blinked in astonishment as I finished the first verse and waited for the words to pick up again. I tried to imagine lying in my room back in my hometown with my mother yelling at me to put it lower.

The words tickled me in a strange way, because I had never thought of this song more than anything but a song. But now as I sang it, I realized that some of the words fit almost too perfectly. Or at least… I was making them fit, tampering with my own mind to mold the pieces of this beautiful song into my life.

There's a side to you that I never knew…

And the things you say, they are never true…

And the games you play… you would always win.

I pulled myself to my feet now and stood up, walking swiftly across the room to him. I was singing very loudly now, and I got the idea he noticed but ignored it. All I knew was that this must be some omen or something.

I would set fire to the rain.

If this castle was the rain that was brining me down, whether that's what the song meant or not, I would set fire to it. Maybe not in the literal sense… but I would do something. I would escape, and make it out alive.

I stopped behind N as he played, his fingers moving so fluently over the keys it made my heart race.

When it fell something died…

I thought of Mienshao and sang.

Let it burn…

All the pain… I sang out as loud as I could, overpowering the piano and N all together.

Suddenly the note cut off into a muted finish and I was left breathlessly holding onto the last few lines of the song. It was powerful and somehow much more different than any other time I had ever sang it.

I clutched my fists together and squeezed my eyes shut, ending with more grace than I had hoped.

I took a deep breath and stared at my bare feet, afraid to meet N's gaze. I did it anyways and was shocked to find him all choked up, his eyes red with emotion. I had never seen anything more than the typical in him. Anger, fear, hurt, but this was deeper… it was raw and I could tell he was befuddled by the emotion himself.

We stared at each other, probably thinking the same things about that night of fighting and pain and loss all together. Surely then we had set fire to the rain…

It had ended with the fire after all.

He blinked then and without saying anything turned back around to the piano, he slid over all the way to one half of the white bench seat, making it obvious I could sit down. And I did.

I fought with my heart, half of me trying to work up the anger and pain of losing Mienshao to his terrible ideals, and the other part that wanted to sing and cry and throw my arms around him because of his terrible life.

I felt sorry for him.

I hated him…

But I felt sorry for him.

He turned back to the piano when I sat, his mouth in a tight line and playing with his long fingers. He sniffed away his tears and I recognized the next song, but didn't know the words. I didn't think I could fit the words into the piano notes even if I did, so I just sat quietly.

He waited for what must have been the next verse before opening his mouth. "Are you ok?" he spoke so softly, not taking his eyes off his hands.

I nodded, wondering if he noticed or not. Of course I wasn't ok, but was I really going to tell him that? Of course not. It wouldn't help anyways. "Are… are you?" I asked instead.

He looked up at me in surprise. "I… I think so."

"What do you mean you think so?"

"I don't know for sure… I hate it when my father gets angry with me… I don't want to be a disappointment."

I glared. "Why do you care what he thinks?"

"I don't like getting hit."

I sighed. N was such a child. Prince or King or whatever he was he didn't know any better. In his mind getting hit must have been a normal thing. He probably grew up with it, feeling the pain of a hard hand on his face every time he did something wrong. And not only that… but I didn't think he ever did things wrong. Look at how much he accomplished already…

Not that I agreed with it… but could Ghetsis really be that uptight?

Of course he was. I sighed, mentally feeling like a broken record.

"I like it when you sing…" He said after I didn't reply.

I looked up to meet his eyes once again, not sure what to say. Even if I wanted to speak I wasn't sure I would have been able to.

He stopped playing when his fingers got off tract and reached up to flip the sheet of music around to the back side. It was a different song I assumed, but I wasn't exactly Beethoven. I wouldn't have known just by looking at it.

I reached my hand across the keys and left it suspended for a second while N scanned the new sheet of music. He wasn't looking so I pressed down on one of the white keys. It was high pitched and sounded off compared to the way N had been playing.

He looked curiously at me and then put his hand on the same key I had touched. He pressed lightly down and somehow it was better now.

"How do you do that?" I mused.

"With the pedals." He answered quickly and looked back to the music. He started playing, stopping every few notes to listen to it. Then he would go back, and start from the beginning.

"You can sing if you want." N said when things got awkward.

"I don't know the words to this song though."

"You can make them up."

"Not really."

"But you just sang to the other song."

"But that's a popular song; I hear it all the time on the radio."

"You didn't make it up?"

I shook my head. Was he crazy? "That song is by someone named Adele, how did you get the music if you didn't even know it was a popular song?"

"Someone brings me new music to play. I don't listen to the radio unless it's talking about the pokemon abuse." His eyes got tense.

"Really?" I ignored the fact that he was listening to those boring news and debate channels that talked about pokemon from all over the world. I shook my head.

"Yes."

"Try changing the channel sometime… I bet you would hear that song I sang with all the other music to it. And it sounds better when Adele sings it; she has a really great voice."

"Is Adele your friend?"

I surprised myself by laughing. "No. She is a famous singer. She lives in Hoenn I think…"

"There is a lot of pokemon abuse out there…" he commented mildly. "Team plasma hasn't gone over yet so no one knows it's wrong and that pokemon need to be free." His eyes stayed focused on the notes of the slow song he played.

"You know not all trainers are abusive right? Not all of us use pokemon… actually most of us don't. Most of us are friends with them and have them as companions because we grow stronger being together."

"Pokemon don't come to people naturally. Its wrong." he said blankly. "Does Adele have pokemon?"

"I think she has one… a little bird pokemon… Chatot? Or something like that." I looked up at his frown.

"A Chatot is a singing pokemon. Like a Jigglypuff but with the ability to mimic any voice it hears. I'm sure she is using the poor thing… we will have to go to Hoenn soon."

"You're so wrong N!" I let my hands fall on the piano keys, interrupting his song. I flinched at the conflicting sounds and looked him in the eyes. He looked frightened.

"N, do you ever think that maybe Chatot is Adele's pokemon BECUASE it's a singing pokemon? And because Adele is a singer? Do you ever consider the other side of the argument?"

"No, not really."

"You should. And what you said about pokemon being with people unnatural…that's not true either because my Mienshao…"

He bit his lower lip.

"My Mienshao found me when I was only eleven years old and it was just a Mienfoo. She was lost or something. But she came to me and I brought her home to my house and she could have had every opportunity to run away and she didn't. I never forced her into a pokeball, I never held her against her own will… she did everything she wanted to. And what she wanted to do was stay with me."

He looked away regretfully. "You are one of a kind, like me. Pokemon come naturally to me because I am a pokemon. I'm a pokemon in a human body… and you must be too if that's true and Mienshao came to you so easily."

I gaped. "You are not a pokemon."

"Yes I am." His voice grew thick with intensity. He looked at me with his vibrant eyes and I could tell it was a subject not to touch on.

"Well I'm not. I'm one hundred and ten percent human." I crossed my arms and looked stubborn.

"You think that because you were raised to believe so."

"If I am a pokemon then why can't I use my psychic abilities and make your brain melt?" I challenged sarcastically.

"You're not a psychic type." He said simply.

"Then what am I?"

"Fire."

I swallowed. It was corny I know, and quite a coincidence, but I just couldn't help but think he knew what he was talking about. Would I really set fire to the rain? A fire pokemon couldn't beat a water type easily… not without some serious training and advantages in skill. Not without will power.

"Why do you say that?" I asked after a moment. "Wouldn't Reshiram have chosen me then? Rather than you?"

He closed his eyes and sighed before looking up at me. "Reshiram chose me because I'm a water type, and water beats fire. He is under my will… he knew he couldn't beat me. And electric types like Zekrom, though they fair well against fire, don't normally have the advantage."

"But Zekrom beat Reshiram…"

He really looked away this time, dropping the subject completely and turning back to him music. It was obvious he didn't have an answer or a reply to that. I thought about what he said carefully. N was a water type… and I was a fire type.

But hadn't I already set fire to the rain? Hadn't I already beaten him? I sighed and wondered if I would ever have the strength to beat him again if it came down to another battle. Probably not… not with the chance of losing another one of my pokemon.

"Hey N…" Which brought us the question.

"Yes?"

"Are… are my other pokemon… are they safe?" I looked down at my twiddling thumbs as I spoke.

"Yes… of course they are." He waited for me to look up into his eyes. I must have looked terribly sad.

"Good…" I whispered anyways. "As long as they are happy and safe…" I wasn't going to tell him that every day I was trying to think of ways to get out of this place. And as soon as I knew where my pokemon were and how to get them I would leave. I would fight my very hardest to get out. But I couldn't do it without my pokemon.

He filled the silence with his magic fingers.

"Is this what you do all day long?" I wondered, tempted to reach out and mess up his song with my sloppy fingers. I had always wished I could make music. I was a decent singer, and had a good strong voice, but to actually be able to play something so beautiful… I knew I didn't have the talent.

"Not always. I have some things to attend to normally… When I'm not on punishment."

"You are king and you are grounded." I scoffed.

"Grounded? What does that mean?"

"It's you are. It's when your parents don't let you do what you want to do because you did something bad. Or when you don't do something…" I added that last part, thinking about how many times I had forgotten to take out the trash on Mondays.

I would spend the rest of my life taking out trash to be out of here.

"Ghetsis doesn't let me go outside without an escort. Is that grounded?"

"Sort of." Jeeze how clueless was he? "But he probably does that so you wont get shot or attacked or something."

"Why would someone do that to me?" He paused, looking stunned.

"Really? You don't know?"

He looked down. "They just don't understand."

I yawned, not wanting to get on the subject. HE was the one who didn't understand.

"Are you tired?"

"No, just yawning for fun." I said slightly sarcastic.

He raised an eyebrow at me. "Why?"

I rolled my eyes. "That was sarcasm." I turned as I spoke, and slid off the bench seat to leave.

"Sarcasm?"

Again I rolled my eyes. "Ill tell you some other time maybe." And I headed over to the hole in the floor that was the exit to the lower floor. My room.

"Good night, Touko." I heard his soft voice as I started stepping down the short steps.

I didn't say anything in return, just yawned once more and went to the bed. I noticed a night gown was slung over the foot of it, but I didn't feel like changing.

Something strange in me felt content with mine and N's awkward conversation, but something else felt incomplete. I listened to the piano for a long time over the muffle of the water slipping down into the fountain. It was soothing and if it wasn't for the fact that I was where I was.

Stuck in Team Plasma's castle against my own will…

I could have been enjoyable.


	5. Chapter 5

I woke up from a dull light casting in from the stain glass windows above the giant door. It wasn't as frightening this morning when I woke up, because I knew where I was and expected the splendor and glory of the room before I opened my eyes. But what I didn't expect was the gorgeous model boy laying in my bed with me, his arms behind his head and his jaw moving steadily as he chomped on a piece of gum.  
I was about to scream, finding a boy in my bed, but he covered my lips with a finger.  
"So help me god I will—  
"Calm down. I just got here." he assured with a smirk. "I'm not a pervert or anything." He winked at me.  
I flushed a dark crimson and wondered if I was going crazy or not. Was last night all just a dream? Had all that alarm going off madness really happened? Had me and N had some sort of breakthrough or not? It was hard to believe it.  
But his perfect face was just too hard to ignore. Too real…  
It was round still, showing the lingering teenager in his eyes. He had round eyes with slight lips and heavy set eyebrows. His body was lean and toned, his dark gray sweatshirt showed no mercy hiding it either.  
"Who the hell are you?" I clutched my hands into fists.  
"I'm still shocked you don't know." He twirled a piece of his white hair and chewed his gum loudly. The smell of mint was only too appropriate for his wintry appearance.  
"Well you won't tell me!"  
"I'm part of the Shadow triad." He snorted. "You probably don't recognize me without all my fancy gear and what not."  
I realized now that this was exactly who I had been trying to think of when I noticed he was familiar before. The Shadow triad… workers that had always seemed to be focused on bringing me to N and nothing else. I had never taken the time to notice them before, considering when they came around I knew I would be seeing N soon. On my journey I was too nervous to pay attention to them anyways.  
Yet here he was, young and sexy and sprawling all over my bed just chewing his gum.  
"Why are you here?" I challenged. "What about the other two?"  
He sat up next to me and blew a quick bubble that popped loudly. He drew it back into his mouth before speaking. "You see… the Shadow triad… we are sworn into serving the highest in command."  
"That's N." I assumed. "The king."  
"Well it was." the boy silenced me with another pop of his bubble. "But you see, part of the deal is if the king fails or is beaten in battle, we have to serve his successor."  
I blinked in astonishment.  
"That's you, incase you were wondering." His crooked smile made me look away.  
"What about the other two?" I repeated, feeling like they would pop up out of no where and scare me.  
"They left." He shook his head. "They didn't believe N could be beaten so they fled the region. Who wants to serve a boring girl like you right?" he teased.  
I just blinked, wondering what to think of that.  
"Does team Plasma know? Does N…?"  
He shook his head looking like it didn't bother him much. "Nah, they think we all left and, quite frankly, no one can catch me from teleporting out of their reach."  
I wasn't sure whether I was intrigued with that inhumanly beautiful smile or frustrated with the way it made me feel.  
"So you came here… to serve me?" I said, just to be sure.  
"Yep."  
"Then you can get my pokemon back for me and get me out?" I realized just the opportunity this could be for me. This was exactly what I needed!  
He laughed. "Not on your life."  
"What? I thought you had to serve me!"  
"Well there are two things wrong with that idea… you see, I cant teleport where I haven't been. And team plasma has a tracking device on me and the others so if they happen to get any ideas they will hunt me down. I'm not saying I couldn't take them…" he shrugged. "But it's not worth it."  
"If you won't help me then why are you here?"  
"To serve you."  
"Then serve me by getting me out of here!"  
"You're cute when you're angry, you know that?"  
I was fuming, my face hot with anger. How dare he! "You have the ability to teleport me out of here in a heartbeat yet you won't? Even though you are SERVING me?"  
"That's right." He folded his arms behind his head again and flopped back down, his head landing on my pillows and chewing his gum as simply as if we had never had the conversation.  
"What do you plan on doing then? To serve me?"  
He opened his eyes and looked up at me with his striking silver eyes. "I figure you would need a friend to keep you busy around here."  
"Why can't we just leave?" I moaned.  
"You would go without your team?" He challenged.  
I grasped the blankets in frustration. "No…"  
"Exactly."  
"But you could get me out of here for now and then I can get help… my friends Cheren and Bianca will help me think of a way to get them out."  
"A book worm and an asthma attack waiting to happen, yeah that will help."  
I glared at him. "Don't talk about my friends like that!"  
"I'm just keeping it real."  
"Well I don't appreciate it."  
He laughed. "I gotta go."  
"Wait… what?"  
"Bye." He winked once more before flickering out of sight. I stared in wonder at the spot he had just been laying in. I squirmed, balling my fists up and stretching them as if I had arthritis. I was just so angry.  
I didn't even know his name and he already drove me crazy.  
"Is someone down there?" N's voice interrupted my fuming and he was waltzing down the spiral staircase. I controlled myself quickly and put on a normal face. He looked around cautiously and saw me sitting awkwardly on the bed, still in the clothes from yesterday. I remembered that I wasn't wearing a bra and was happy I had the sweatshirt for cover up. I hadn't felt self conscious yesterday because I had been too busy thinking about everything else.  
I was now though.  
"No." I shook my head, trying to play dumb. "Why?  
I noticed N was wearing a collared shirt and khaki pants today, they looked pressed and smooth. Professional. His long hair was hanging down freely, showing off great length and a luxurious look to it. His eyes seemed a little brighter today and the red had faded from his cheeks. He still had a yellowing bruise on one of his cheek bones and I realized that it wasn't Ghetsis slapping that did that, a slap wasn't solid enough to make a bruise.  
"I thought I heard something." he said, walking over to the edge of my bed. "It worried me."  
"Hey N… I… did I…?"  
He looked at me like I was speaking another language.  
"Did I do that?" I pointed to the bruise on his face. I had punched him with all my strength that night. I actually might have been insulted if it didn't leave a bruise. I was still guilty though. Who was to say I was any better than Ghetsis?  
I felt my heart lurch and pushed the feeling down. No way. Ghetsis was a monster that hit his own son for no reason. I had hit his son for a very good reason. There was a difference.  
"Yeah… But it's ok."  
"No its not… I'm sorry." I looked him in the eyes. My mother always told me to look people in the eyes when you apologize because it would be more personal. She said it would help them understand that you had made a mistake.  
He nodded at me. "It really is ok."  
"I was just… freaking out. I wasn't thinking and I was… just so upset I couldn't control myself."  
"Touko, its ok. I forgive you. You are supposed to forgive people when they apologize and mean It." he repeated the words I had spoken to him when I first woke up here.  
Did I mean it? Did I really regret punching him that night? With everything I had seen here since I woke up the next day… I really honestly did. N had enough abuse in his life.  
"But… do you forgive me?" He asked.  
I wondered if I did. Was it really his fault my Mienshao had died? I knew the answer was yes in a sense… but that was just because I had been battling him. Because he was the king I had to fight over ideals with. Had that king been Ghetsis, it would have been his fault. Ghetisis was the root of this all anyways. N and all his beliefs and the way he looked at pokemon and especially pokemon trainers. It was all spoon fed to him since the day he was born.  
For gods sake N didn't even think he was a human!  
So how could I leave him un-forgiven?  
I looked up into his eyes and saw that they were losing hope. He pouted and looked down. "I'm sorry… and I really honestly do mean it."  
"Why are you doing this, N?" I asked him. "Why do you want me to forgive you so badly? I don't think I get it… I mean, we are enemies. We have completely different ideals and I don't think we live in the same world at all. You believe in what you believe in, and I believe in what I believe in. So why are we trying to apologize when at some point this will all just happen over again?"  
He was stunned by my speech, unsure of what to say.  
"So you see, N?" my voice grew quiet. "Why would I forgive you when things aren't going to get better? When this will all end in tragedy? When you apologize you have to mean it and learn from the mistake you made. We made a mistake when we battled; neither of us was strong enough to win. It was practically a tie, and the only way one of us is ever going to get what we want is if we fight for it. Right?"  
He nodded. "I… I guess your right."  
I felt absolutely terrible. All he wanted was three little words.  
I. Forgive. You.  
And here I was ruining the one chance I had of making his life even slightly better for him. Sure he was king and got practically everything he wanted in the exact second he wanted it… but he hadn't the love or the heart he needed to be… human.  
"I have to go check up on my workers…" N whispered after a long moment.  
I stared at him wishing I was a stronger person. If Mienshao was here she would be prodding me gently, encouraging me to let go of all the pain. She wouldn't want me to dwell on losing her. She would want nothing to ever get me down, she never did.  
She was the most loyal pokemon I had ever had and she was gone.  
How many times would those words invalidate my mind? How many times would I sit here wondering who was to blame for her death? Was it me for being too strong willed? Was it N and his Zoroark? Was it Ghetsis for creating this monster? Or was it Mienshao herself, for having too much courage.  
Nothing seemed to fit and I felt lonely as ever.  
N left without another word, pushing the huge door open with ease and going out into the hall. I didn't hear much noise so I decided to go investigate. Anything to keep me busy, but I waited a few minutes first. I wanted to make sure N was out of the hall way, even though that was still part of my floor, and I was secretly wondering if that shadow triad boy would come back.  
I had to convince him to help me. If he was so devoted to serving me then he would have to agree eventually. My hopes weren't high, he seemed like he wanted to annoy me more than serve.  
I felt dirty in the same clothes I had worn yesterday, so I figured a hot shower would work, even if I would be tempted to open that window again. I dreaded the thought of alarms going off again. How could something as big as team plasma be worried about one teenage girl?  
But then again… I was sort of the root of their destruction. I caused the fall through, I had the connections to Alder and all the gym leaders. Plus Cheren and Bianca. Though they weren't the best trainers in the world they sure were strong ones. Any association would be frightened of that right?  
The hall was empty when I went out of the room, except for one young lady that startled me. She had strange golden hair and her features were petite.  
"Oh!" she jumped back. "Sorry Miss Touko." She apologized for my fright but she looked to have experienced the worst of it.  
I gave her a strange look. Miss?  
"Do you need clothes Miss Touko?" I hadn't noticed that she had a full laundry basket at her side. "Lord N asked me to bring you them."  
"Oh… um yeah thanks." I nodded. "Are you part of team plasma?" she wasn't dressed like them.  
"Oh yes." She smiled a sweet smile and looked proud. "I'm one of the goddesses. My name is Concordia."  
"Oh. Ok." I said as she picked up the basket and handed it to me. I scanned it quickly and realized that I was missing bras once again. I figured if I had to ask anyone it should be Concordia. She seemed friendly enough.  
"N doesn't really know what a girl needs does he?" I mumbled before she had the chance to say something else or leave.  
"Oh no… I don't think he really even knows the difference between a girl and a boy. Anthea and I never taught him about that kind of stuff."  
Even pokemon knew the difference between male and female, I thought with disbelief.  
"Do you think I could get a couple bras?" I asked her before I could get side tracked. I hated not wearing a bra during the day.  
"Why yes." She bowed to me and then turned to leave.  
I watched her go before turning and going back into my huge room. I set the basket down and dug through it, finding a lot of the same things. Jeans, t-shirts, socks—I was happy about that—and underwear. Everything was my size, but nothing I would have ever bought myself.  
Simple grays… some blue and white, but not much. The best thing I found was a pair of black sweats I could lounge around in and a hair and tooth brush. I sighed with relief and grabbed them out of the basket. I was about to leave the rest of the clothes alone when I saw something black folded neatly at the bottom of it.  
A dress?  
I pulled it out and examined it, wondering why I would ever need this. It was knee length, tight, and had some electric blue beading. It wasn't exactly the kind of dress I would like, but I surprised myself with how much I did. I wasn't the dress wearing girl, not unless I had a very good reason to wear one, but this was just too luxurious not to notice.  
I couldn't picture myself in it. A dress like that made a girl like me look like white trash. I almost laughed before turning to leave the room.  
The shower was easier to manage today. I didn't make the stupid mistake of getting in before I turned the water on, so I wasn't adjusting things with my feet. The water was hot, almost burning me and filling the large marble room with steam. I couldn't see much more than three feet away from me, it was that bad.  
The shampoo on the ledge in the shower smelt like apples and cinnamon, but the conditioner might as well have been lard. It was so thick I almost decided not to use it. There wasn't an innocent smell to make it more convincing either, but the thought of running a brush through my knotted hair won the argument in my head.  
I lathered and rinsed three or four times before I was sure I was clean, free of all the rich filth of this castle. I wanted to feel like myself again. I was so convinced I could in that steamy room I thought that maybe when I got out I would be home, walking out into the long skinny hallway that overlooked the living room below. I wondered if my mother knew where I was…  
Was Cheren thinking of a way to get me out right now?  
I turned the hot water off, suddenly feeling cold and stepping out. The steam flitted around and made me shudder. I wiped my hand across the huge mirror to look at my flushed self. My hair looked like a hay stack when I dried it with the towel and I got to work with the new brush.  
Things were just as bad, if not worse, than they looked. It took me about ten minutes to get through all the snarls and I was tearing up at the way the pulling made me have to sneeze. The bristles were full of my hair when I was done. I pulled it out and tossed it into the waste basket by the toilet.  
I dried the rest of me quickly and brushed me teeth before wrapping the thick towel around myself before walking out into the hall. I was expecting a quick quiet walk back to my room, but to my embarrassment plasma grunts were busy once again. I bit my lip, wondering how long they would be running back and fourth on this floor.  
I decided reluctantly, when I realized that everyone was already casting me nervous glances, I would just go now. No one would have enough time to really notice me…  
Right?  
The huge door was much more of a hassle to open when you are clutching a towel around yourself. It took the unasked for help of a grunt to open it for me. I turned to say thank you but they already left. I scowled, everyone seemed pretty willing to help me, yet they were still rude.  
To my relief my room was empty and quiet. The door must be so big and heavy to keep out the noise, because I could hardly hear anything as soon as it shut. I walked swiftly to the clothes basket and grabbed the things I had left on top. Jeans and the only tank top that was probably meant for underneath the only button up shirt.  
There was a small plastic bag sitting on the edge of my bed with the bras I requested in it. Again, simple and bland. At least this wasn't a fashion statement. I clipped it around myself quickly and started to get dressed.  
Feeling refreshed and motivated I got up and went back out into the hall. I looked so different in my normal clothes compared to everyone else, and the stares I got this time didn't make me self conscious. It was almost like these people were envying me.  
I hadn't looked into the other doors besides the bathroom and the dank storage closet, though two more lay at the end of the hall. The first one had plasma grunts running in and out of like lightening, so I stayed clear of it.  
The other one was smaller and wooden, like my bedroom door back home. It had a simple doorknob with simple square shapes in it. I reached for the handle and opened it. It was exactly what I was expecting. The play room.  
Something in me felt strange, staring at all the stuffed pokemon and huge building blocks and the basketball hoop against the far corner. It was like I couldn't take any of this seriously, but at the same time it made everything even more vital. I looked around the stripped walls and the cloud covered floor and the toys, wondering what exactly it was all doing here. Did every floor have a room like this?  
Then I understood. This wasn't a room for any human, this was a pokemon room. I only figured it out when N's Zoroark came snuffling out from behind the skateboard ramp. I stiffened; hate filling my veins like fire.  
It didn't notice me at first, just buried itself into a pile of stuffed pokemon and made a happy groaning noise. I could hardly believe I was staring at the same pokemon that murdered Mienshao. I bit my lip and just watched it rolled around in bliss before it finally noticed me.  
It shot up, his face shocked. He closed his jaw tight and got to his two hind legs. He crouched over and just stared at me. Then, as if to be funny, it transformed.  
I was suddenly staring at myself. I grit my teeth together and balled my fists up. He saw the frustration and fell quickly back into his normal shape, his eyes sorry. He walked over cautiously, his head hung low with regret and I knew this wasn't just because of its nature of transforming. I grew more rigid as it approached me.  
God forbid I do anything to this pokemon… he meant the world to N and with no one around I could have thought of something to make N feel the pain I felt over losing Mienshao. I knew I would never hurt a pokemon, I wasn't that cruel, but my motives didn't falter.  
"Zoroark… you know you… you killed Mienshao."  
He snorted and shook his head, covering his ears and looked away like it hurt. He stared at the ground and inched closer to me. I waited until his eyes met mine once more.  
"You were already winning that battle… yet you still attacked her and killed her."  
He shook his head with dramatic movements. "Zoooarrr!"  
"What do you mean no?" I hissed.  
He pushed his head into my fist and tried to get it to loosen. He made strange begging noises and his soft fur tickled me. I waited once more, realizing that he was sorry. Truly, purely, agonizingly sorry in the way that only a pokemon could be. My heart of stone melted and it was just too much to bear.  
I pulled my tight hand away from him and turned to leave. He tried to fallow me but seeing that I left the room and slammed the door he couldn't. There was a faint cry as I stormed down the hallway once more. What was I supposed to do?  
Forgive him?  
Just like that…  
I couldn't.

…..

"Touko?"  
I was under the bed again.  
"Come on Touko I know you are in here somewhere…"  
Gorgeous lay at my side snickering.  
"Please tell me why Zoroark is so upset with you, he wont tell me!" N pleaded.  
I sighed softly and looked over at those silver eyes. "What do you want?" I whispered when N's feet were further away.  
"Not much." He shrugged, army crawling closer to the end of the bed and looking out further. "Why is the royal baby freaking out?" he asked me. "What did you do?" I didn't miss the flash of approval in his devious eyes.  
"I didn't do anything!" I hissed. "And… what are you doing—I mean… why are you— ugh!" he just had to be so perfect didn't he?  
"Yes?" his eyelashes fluttered at my disoriented-ness.  
"What is your name?" I blinked.  
"Trouble."  
I glared.  
He laughed quietly. "Alright, my name is Tate. Happy?"  
"Tate?" I raised an eyebrow,  
"You hang out with people that have a letter for a name and you're worried about Tate being weird?" he asked skeptically.  
I hated to admit it, but the name Tate was just as sexy as he was. It was so simple yet so… almost mysterious. Even so, it bothered me what he said.  
"I don't hang out with N."  
"Oh, right. I forgot you just sing to him."  
I turned cherry red. "I thought you were here to serve me? Not spy on me!" it was hard to control my voice and kept it low.  
He shrugged. "You are right. Let me help you out."  
I was about to ask him how when he suddenly spoke so fast it startled me.  
"Under here!" he squeaked in the best impression of my voice he could muster. I tried to grab him, thrust my hand in front of his mouth or punch him or something to make him stop. But as soon as I moved he vanished.  
I groaned. "Tate!" a little too loudly.  
"Touko?" N's voice became confused.  
I started squirming out from under the bed, wishing I wasn't such a chicken to have been hiding anyways. I didn't want to see anyone; I didn't want to have to look at this too big, too beautiful prison that was my room. I felt safe under the bed.  
He spotted me and came over quickly, looking at me in confusion. "What happened? Why were you under the bed?"  
I pulled myself up to sit and folded my arms. "I don't know."  
"Did you get lost?"  
"Lost under the bed?" I suddenly laughed. "It's not like the gateway to Narnia is down there or anything."  
"What…?"  
"Nevermind."  
"Touko, Zoroark is very upset and he won't tell me why but I know it has something to do with you." N suddenly became offensive. His eyebrows came together and I mimicked the action.  
"I didn't do anything to your Zoroark!" I defended myself.  
"Yes you did. Pokemon don't lie and he said it had something to do with you and he is upset so you must have done something."  
I stared at him in disbelief. "Are you kidding me N? Just because it has something to do with me doesn't mean I did something wrong."  
"But he is ups—  
"Because I wont forgive him for killing my Mienshao!" I cut him off. "He is guilty but I'm not ready to let this go. So I didn't forgive him."  
"But why not?" N's jaw was tight. "You're hurting him!"  
I stood up and faced N, my shoulders back. He may have flinched or may not have, I didn't notice, instead I jabbed a finger at him.  
"Now you listen to me ok? What would you do if your Zoroark died in battle? What if this situation was the opposite? Would you forgive my pokemon for being so ruthless?"  
N looked flustered and traumatized. Never before was he forced to think of the possibility of his pokemon dying. I could see it in his eyes. He didn't understand. He didn't get the pain because he couldn't make a choice.  
"I… I love all pokemon the same… if I was hurting one by not forgiving it I—I would…"  
"You wouldn't forgive my pokemon if it killed Zoroark and you know it!" I whirled away from him and stormed tours the door, not sure where I was going, but going somewhere other than here for sure.  
"Why Zoroark?" he called after me. "I would forgive it if it was any other pokemon. Pick a different one!"  
I stopped, my hand lingering on the door. "You are so human N. you think you treat all pokemon equally, but you know you love Zoroark more than anyone else."  
"That's not true!" his face turned a shade of red. "I'm a pokemon! I'm not a human!"  
I pushed the huge door open and left, ignoring him. I wondered when that boy would ever grow up. He was so stubborn.  
"I'm a pokemon!" I heard him call before the hefty door swung shut.  
I walked through a small crowd of grunts all staring in surprise, having heard N's plea. Some eyes were amused, some angry, and some sad. I spotted Concordia at the far end of the hallway, her eyes full of despair. She looked sympathetically at me as I walked to the bathroom door and went inside. I locked it.  
"You really shouldn't do that to the poor guy." Tate's voice came. He was sitting on the bathroom counter.  
"Why did you do that to me!"  
"You would have had to face him eventually. I was doing you a favor." He said cheerily.  
"I should punch you so hard." I curled my hands under my arms and bit the inside of my cheek.  
"Do it." he said simply. "See if you can catch me."  
I didn't move or speak. I knew he could teleport away in the blink of an eye. I wasn't about to make a fool of myself trying to punch him, no matter how badly I wanted to.  
"That's what I thought." he smirked and flickered. "See you later, Touko."  
And damn that boy winked at me and left.


	6. Chapter 6

N was turning out to be a pretty lousy king. All he ever did was call people on the phone from other regions, order grunts to go patrol specific cities, listen to boring news about strong trainers that could serve as a threat, and preach about liberation this and liberation that.  
Sure from a plasma point of view this must have qualified him as a god, but it pissed me off. I hadn't spoken to him in two days, and I got the idea he was purposefully keeping himself busy so we wouldn't have to interact with each other much. Concordia seemed to have taken over his "punishment" of taking care of me, but I really just got the idea she missed caring for someone.  
Her and Anthea had served as big sisters to N while he grew up. Big sisters that were a good ten or so years older than him. But not old enough to be his mother. I had the feeling the two couldn't get enough mothering. They seemed to enjoy talking to me, even though it got pushy after a while. It was nice to have some friends here.  
I had spent all day literally pacing the floor wondering what to do. I couldn't stop thinking about why Concordia and Anthea hadn't stopped by to say hello like they always did when I was eating the breakfast that magically appeared at the foot of my bed everyday.  
I couldn't stop thinking about my pokemon and what they were doing and if they were ok. N had said they were safe but I just found it hard to believe. By safe he probably meant released back into the wild. I shuddered at the thought, but wondered if that was a good option. My pokemon were smart enough to stick together… maybe they would have found there way back home and stayed with my mother or professor Juniper. It was a faint hope… but I had to have something.  
Zoroark and his desperate plea for forgiveness was haunting me. I came to the realization that I WANTED to forgive him. I wanted to know I had the strength to let go and forgive. But I couldn't forget…  
With the help of N's piano lulling me to sleep at night, Mienshao was haunting me too. The last three nights I had spent watching her leave me in some way or another. She had been burned into soot, washed away with a flood, and crushed into a million tiny pieces. Every night was something different it seemed. I would wake up very early in the morning around the same time I force myself to get up and sit on the couch facing the huge window. I had taken a liking to the royal blue couch because I could fall asleep on it and dreams never haunted me there.  
I got pretty far off my sleeping schedule and ended up spending today lounging around in the one pair of sweats I had been given. And unlike the other nights, when I tried to fall asleep, N's Piano kept me awake rather than putting me to sleep. It was so sad sounding… so upset and lost and mourning. I wanted to go up and see what he was doing being so depressed, but I promised myself I would stop worrying about it so much and just go to bed.  
I tried counting flaffy to keep my mind off of things, but it didn't work. It actually made it worse. Like when you try so hard not to think about something it makes you think about it more. That's exactly what happened. Plus with the piano playing I didn't have much choice.  
Tossing and turning in that huge bed I felt awful. Why was he doing this to me? Why couldn't N just leave me alone? Let me have my pokemon back, admit defeat and let me go? Why? Why! Why! Why!  
I clutched at the pillow over my head and tried to drown out the sad sound. I thought it was working at first, but it just so happened that N was changing songs again. The melody stopped and I expected something even more depressing.  
It was familiar though, welcoming.  
I groaned out loud and knew there was no hope for me now. I would have set fire to the rain stuck in my head all night. I would be trying to understand the subliminal message lying beneath the lyrics and going crazy.  
I was a fire type and N was a water type. Was it wrong of me to think that I could base our fighting off of some assumption he made? N needed to be hospitalized because his brain didn't work right. He honestly thought he was a pokemon. Hell! The guy thought I was a pokemon!  
The song played louder than the others had, more pressing. I couldn't drown this one out even a little bit, so I just gave up and threw the pillow over to the other side of the bed.  
"I'll set fire to the rain…" I whispered at the appropriate moment and then scoffed. "Thanks Adele, you just had to write this didn't you?"  
The song cut off suddenly and silence almost came. The trickling of the water still sounded, but I was so used to it now it might as well have been silence.  
Then a huge, loud, drowning sound came from the floor above. I jumped in surprise, realizing now that N was TRYING to keep me up. I sighed and pushed myself out of bed. I gave up on trying to be mad, but I refused to act like it was ok either. I found my way to the spiral staircase easily, but had trouble walking up it in the dark. I couldn't see the steps very well except for the faint moonlight shining on the glass-like surface. Eventually I got the movement down and made it to the top.  
I knocked on the bubble door much softer than I wanted to. The music stopped anyways and I waited.  
It was just as dark in his room by the looks of it. I couldn't see when his shape came up to it and he pulled it open. His green eyes stared down at me and I tried my hardest not to glare.  
"What are you doing?" I asked him. It was the first thing I had said to him in three days.  
"Playing my piano, what are you doing?"  
This time I did glare. "You were trying to keep me awake."  
"No… I was trying to wake you up. I thought you were asleep." he corrected me, backing up and giving me the space to come through.  
"Why?" I stayed put.  
He bit his lower lip and looked away, slightly ashamed. He was wearing a loose grey long sleeve shirt and sweats like mine, only they weren't rolled up around his waste because they were too long. His hair wasn't tied back like he normally had it either. It was all falling freely around his shoulders and down his back. It looked slightly damp.  
"I… thought you might want to listen to me play." He shuffled awkwardly.  
I sighed. Whether that was the true or not, I knew not speaking with him wasn't going to help anything. It wasn't worth it to be angry at him just because he thought he was a pokemon and I knew he wasn't.  
I gathered myself and climbed the last steps to his floor. I stood next to him. "Why would you think that?" I mused, trying not to sound too critical. He couldn't possibly know I liked the way he played piano… I never told him that before.  
"I… I guess I don't know." N put his hands in his pockets and blinked at me. I noticed in the dim light how bright his green eyes were. Emerald green…  
"Well I guess I can listen…" I spoke before thinking.  
His face grew a little happier and I knew I couldn't back down now. His faint smile twisted my heart in a way I didn't think possible and it made me think of the first time he smiled at me on the ferriswheel in Nimbasa City.  
Come to think of it… everything I ever thought of him before Mienshao had been killed somehow hid itself inside of me until this very moment. I remembered all the days I spent training my pokemon just to stick it to him in battle. I remembered how many nights I spent thinking about him and why he was doing what he did. I had racked my brain for so long and then it all just shut down…  
But mostly I remembered that ferriswheel ride… when he told me who he was and his plan for this region. I hadn't been angry at the time… I only remembered feeling motivated. I had thought that I could change N's mind if I really tried.  
But this was all before…  
So I pushed it back down into the safe it was locked away in and shook myself internally. I almost stalled long enough to notice when N turned and headed to the piano across the room. I fallowed though, before I could let the safe in my heart open up again.  
Confused with sudden emotions I didn't pay attention to the ground in front of me, and when I came to the step up that the piano was on I tripped. I squeaked with terror and reached out to grab the piano to catch myself. It turned out being N though, who I clutched for dear life in the dark.  
"Did you trip?" He asked in surprise, but made no attempt to pull away from me. My hands were gripping his arm and I hated that the only thing occurring to me was the fact that his bicep was hard and toned.  
I found my feet and pulled myself up, letting him go and flushing with heat. I was glad it was dark. N's hand surprised me then, his long fingers stroked the length of my wrist and I couldn't tell if it was an accident or not. I bit my lower lip and found the piano bench in front of me.  
Hesitantly I sat down.

~N~

I couldn't believe it. After days of wondering why she hated me, why her of all people, wouldn't understand… she just comes to me on her own. I was holding down a smile—even though she wouldn't have seen it in the dark—and trying to understand why she was doing what she did.  
Her words had struck me in a place I never thought they could. "You are so human" she had said… and I didn't believe her. But it was making me paranoid. You would think I wouldn't want anything to do with Touko now… but I couldn't explain it, I had this unbearable desire to just see her.  
I figured it must be because we both were pokemon on the inside.  
What I couldn't figure out was the desire to not only see her, but to touch her. I wanted to feel her skin and maybe her hair, it looked softer than mine. I forced myself not to though, afraid she would hit me again like she had when I tried to touch her that night when Mienshao passed.  
I had thought I understood comfort… even just a little bit. Concordia and Anthea would put there hand on my shoulder for comfort when I was upset as a child. I wanted to do the same for Touko that night, but she had launched an attack on me for even attempting it.  
So I was absolutely stunned when she tripped and chose ME to grab onto. So stunned I couldn't even make sense of what happened. I blinked with wide eyes.  
"Did you trip?" the words even felt strange to me, though they had come out of my mouth.  
She didn't respond, but hesitated to pull away from me. I wondered why I didn't want her to let go, why I wasn't afraid…  
Gently I stretched my hand forward and brushed the back of her wrist with my fingertips as she moved. She didn't say anything again, just sat down on the piano bench and waited. I sat next to her quickly, allowing little space between us.  
Strange little electric static bolts pierced the air between us and I wondered what was different about her tonight. In the low light I couldn't see much, but I knew the piano keys well enough to play it by ear alone. I tried to focus on that and not her arm only an inch or so away from mine.  
"When did you learn to play?" she spoke with a troubled voice.  
I let my fingers dance before speaking to her. "I was taught by Anthea." My voice sounded strange… too soft, too whispery.  
"You play… really well." I didn't have to look at her to know she was looking at me. Something like stage fright came over me then and I tripped over my own fingers, making the song sound off. I just stopped then, altogether to look at her.  
"I messed up…" I curled my fingers up and felt my nails dig into the palms of my hands.  
I couldn't tell if she smiled at me or not, but she moved and brought her arms up to the keys. I wasn't sure if I liked it when she touched my piano or not. Part of me wanted to be selfish, but the other part just wanted to listen and hear what music she could make.  
It wasn't music at all, so I shifted my feet and pressed the pedals below to make her note sound somewhat pretty. She was surprised when it sounded decent, but her fingers couldn't repeat the action. The next note she hit was rough around the edges, making me flinch.  
She pulled her hands away. "Yeah, I'm not all that musical." She admitted almost proudly.  
"You know how to sing." I said. Mentally I was hoping she would start singing, so my fingers started playing set fire to the rain. She liked that song it seemed, and I wanted her to start singing it again. What a surprise it was that day she came up here singing.  
She missed her entrance and I realized she wasn't going to sing. I pouted.  
"I don't want to sing that song." She said when I stopped. "It's not appropriate for the moment."  
I didn't understand what she meant. "What song do you want to sing then?"  
"I don't know… can you play any Celine Dion?"  
"Who?"  
"Oh right… I forgot."  
"Forgot what?" I felt absolutely stupid.  
"I forgot that you don't know about artists. You only get piano music to play, but you don't know the original singers."  
I didn't know why that bothered her. Wasn't the piano enough? I never understood much other music or instruments. The guitar could be ok, but I didn't prefer it. Drums made me feel like my head was pounding, and I really didn't know what else there was, except maybe band music which was just atrocious. Who liked blaring horns?  
"Do you have a radio we can listen to?" she asked me suddenly. "I'm sure I would know the words to those songs."  
I didn't know if it was worth it to listen to all those other musical instruments to here Touko sing, but I didn't say no. I wasn't sure what she would do if I did, so I got up and walked over to my bed and fished around for the remote to the stereo. I never listened to anything other than news, so I didn't know how to change the station. I handed her the remote after turning it on. My fingertips sizzled when they touched hers.  
The room grew a faint blue color from the lights on the stereo by the window. It was enough light to see the features of her face, and I wasn't disappointed. A strange feeling came over me again. How could I describe it? It didn't seem right to say she was as gentle looking as an Oshawott, or as graceful as a Swanna. I sighed as she fidgeted with the remote and found the right button.  
Wasn't she fazed by the electricity between us at all? Maybe it was only bothering me because I was a water pokemon. She was a fire type; of course it wouldn't affect her much. I wished it did… it wasn't a terrible feeling, just a tingling one.  
The scratchiness of the stations didn't appeal to me, it was too loud for this time of night, and I hoped someone wouldn't hear it. Then she tuned it in further to something that sounded like guitars and drums and I wanted to cover my ears.  
"This is a rock station." She said, her eyes illuminated with the light of the radio. She smiled at me and I felt my heart beginning to speed up.  
What was happening to me?  
"I like this kind of music some times, but it's not what I usually listen to." she started flipping the stations again. It stopped on something twangy and the voices I heard didn't sound as serious as those of the rock station. She started mouthing the words but didn't actually sing. I frowned.  
"Country music." She explained. "I like it a lot, but sometimes it's just kind of silly."  
I got the idea she was trying to talk to hide her embarrassment.  
"Why do they call it country? Or… why do they call it rock?" I asked. When I thought of rock I thought of rock pokemon. Certainly not music.  
She switched it again, making me wonder if she had heard my question or was just ignoring me. "This is my stuff." It stopped on something more like rock. "Well, I like all music, but this is a great song." Her eyes did that strange twinkling thing again and she started mumbling the words.  
"A little bit of Sandra in the sun, a little bit of Mary all night long." She sang in a voice I didn't like. It wasn't her, and I didn't even know what she was talking about.  
I thought I might start to understand what she was saying when the song became more fluent, but she switched it again.  
"I thought that was a good song?"  
"It is, but I want to listen to easy listening. You should like it, it's a lot of soft stuff." She stopped again and set the remote down.  
I listened carefully for a minute then sat down on the edge of my bed. She pulled her legs up underneath her on the piano bench and waited.  
"This is just a bunch of talking." I said after a minute.  
"It's a commercial. Like on TV but without the pictures." She always managed to make me feel stupid somehow. I wondered if she noticed how it affected me.  
Suddenly a song started playing, piano, and I liked it, just like she said I would. I was stuck trying to listen to the music and her at the same time I got confused. It seemed like a lot going on for just one song, so I settled on just listening to her.  
"If we fall in love… we will have this melody in our heads… and if we fall in love… we can write a better song than this."  
I only caught bits and pieces of the song because she kept stopping to let the radio answer her.  
"Why did you stop?" I whispered after the third time she did it.  
"Oh." She looked at me. "Because it's a duet. A boy and a girl sing at the same time, so I was just singing the girls part."  
"Is that like courtship dancing between butterfree?"  
She blinked in surprise. "Well… not really. I guess its kind of the same idea. The girl sings one part then the boy, and back and fourth. So, sure, if you want to put it that way."  
I still wasn't sure. I didn't understand the ways of courtship between pokemon anyways; it was the one thing I was sure I had to experience before I could fully understand. But I didn't know how to experience it. It frustrated me beyond repair.  
I was about to ask Touko if she knew about courtship but her face made me think otherwise. She was lost in the music, letting it take her in waves, bringing the very faintest trace of a smile to her lips.  
I wanted her to sing, I wanted to hear it… I wanted to touch her lips where the sound came from. Or maybe her eyelids where her blue eyes fluttered peacefully open and closed. A strange feeling came over me again, this time worse than before and I swallowed.  
Shifting uncomfortably on the bed I could feel my pelvis growing in a tingling kind of way. This didn't happen often, and surely never at night before. The sweats I was wearing suddenly felt tighter and I had to curl my hands up into balls to hide the desire of touching myself.  
I took a deep breath, thinking about how this feeling wasn't normal. Pokemon didn't get like this… not that I had ever seen. I am a pokemon… I told myself. I AM a pokemon. I got worried, knowing that this wasn't a pokemon trait. Pokemon were normal, humans were the under-species, the "abnormal" ones.  
I'm not a human… I'm a pokemon.  
Finally it passed with my worry and I felt myself deflate back into a more normal state. The only reasonable explanation for that emotion and "growing" was that I could be evolving. But even that didn't make sense to me. I was in a human body, so how could I evolve?  
And I had already evolved once when Ghetsis made me king… I couldn't evolve again.  
"So what do you think, N?" Touko spoke suddenly.  
"Huh?" my hands uncurled and I realized I hadn't heard the music at all. "I… I like it." I said, trying not to sound like she fazed me.  
"You look kind of like you've seen ghost pokemon." She said. "But listen… I guess since you decided to wake me up and force me to spend time with you—I flinched at her words—maybe then I can apologize for yelling at you a couple days ago."  
"Its ok." I said; a reflex reaction. Apology= forgiveness, I understood but she didn't. This should make her realize…  
"I know me being stuck here isn't exactly your fault." She went on. "Ghetsis is the one who put me here. Right?"  
I nodded.  
"So I shouldn't be mad at you. I mean, you didn't ask to have to watch me either." her voice was more genuine than I had ever heard it before.  
"I wouldn't keep you here Touko." I admitted. Sometimes I wondered if she thought I was the one who was bounding her against her own will. I would have let her go… I would have taken her poor pokemon and released them first, but I would have let her go then. Ghetsis was the one who wanted her here.  
But then when I really stopped to think about it… part of me was happy with her here. Happy like the way I felt when my pokemon friends were around.  
"Really?" Touko's face became something of hope. "Then you can let me go."  
"What? No!"  
"Yes! You're the king; N they have to listen to you." she got up off the bench seat and came over to stand in front of me. I looked into her eyes.  
"Don't hit me, please…"  
She stepped back in shock. "What?"  
"I… I don't want you to be angry with me."  
She looked at me like I must have been crazy, shaking her head. "N… I—I know I hit you once… but… that was because I was so upset I couldn't think straight. But… you don't understand." She kept her hands at her sides as she perched herself on the bed next to me. I pulled slightly away from her.  
"N, I wouldn't hit you…" she said so softly I had to look up. Her large blue eyes made me sad, but also happy. It was bittersweet.  
"Why… why wouldn't you?" I wondered. "If I made you mad?"  
"Because N!" she threw her arms up and I thought she was going to hit me then. I flinched but they fell right back to her lap. "It's wrong… You're not supposed to hurt people just because you are upset with them… If they hurt you first, that's another story, but… the way Ghetsis is, and the way I am…"  
I stared at her in surprise, having not even thought about my father once.  
"I'm not like him. I'm not like anyone that has ever hurt you N… I'm not violent like that."  
"But in battle—  
"Battle is different. It's all adrenalin. And I promise you… that night when Mienshao died… that was just… I don't what happened to me. I got so upset because you wanted to touch her." she looked away.  
I blinked in surprise. "No… I didn't want to touch Mienshao."  
She looked at me in surprise.  
"I wanted to… to comfort you."  
She surprised me by laughing. "Are you kidding me? You're lucky you didn't because I may have murdered you right then and there."  
"But… but you said you wouldn't hurt—  
"Sometimes people can't help themselves." She regretted her word choice, and then a song distracted her. "Hey!" her face lit up. "Listen to this song, it's about a ferriswheel."  
I listened for a long minute. Trying to get the gist of it. It was happy sounding, something more appropriate to a sunny, summer day rather than a gloomy spring night. I surprised myself by liking it. Mostly because I liked ferriswheels, but also because it made Touko smile. I liked it very much when she smiled.  
She was humming along softly, her words coming through ever so slightly. I wondered how she learned to sing like that. "Look at the small town spinning around. We got our feet dangling high off the ground… Can you believe, baby… how good it feels… falling in love on a ferriswheel…"  
I listened to her voice, my lips twitching, wishing I could make the same kind of noise. I racked my brain trying to think of a fire pokemon that had the ability to sing. She must be something special. An undiscovered pokemon in a human body…  
"Have you always been able to sing?" I asked her when she started humming again.  
"I guess." she shrugged. "I've never taken lessons or anything. I'm not that great compared to some singers.  
"I think you're really great." I spoke without thinking about it, then wondered if I should regret it. I flushed again.  
She laughed softly. "Well thank you. I think you play the piano really great."  
No one had ever told me that before. No one ever really told me things they liked that I did at all. My throat started to grow tight.  
Touko moved once more, the lack of response from me made me wonder if she was ok. Did she expect me to say thank you? I wasn't sure if it was appropriate for a complement… because I didn't ever get the chance to say thank you to one. I expected her to get up and leave, perhaps to go to sleep down in her room.  
I watched as she uncurled her legs from around herself and lay back with a yawn, her head landing on my pillows. No one else ever dared lie on my bed, I wasn't sure what to do.  
"Pretty luxurious here…" she mumbled almost too soft for me to hear.  
"This isn't as exciting as my real room." I may have been boasting a little, but she didn't have to know that. "I have a very large washroom in my bedroom and twice the space of this one."  
"Hah!" she snorted. "You're a little spoiled aren't you?"  
I frowned. "What do you mean?" How could she compare me to food? Last I heard someone say something was spoiled was when a grunt was watching some health channel on TV. It was to describe the food. Rotten, old, distasteful. There was a sinking feeling in my chest.  
"Spoiled, like… you know, you get everything you want." She pulled her arms around her head and looked back up at me.  
That surely wasn't what I thought it meant. It didn't seem as bad to me though. "I'm king… they give me everything I want as long as it wont hurt me."  
She rolled her eyes and then closed them. I wasn't sure what corrupted me to do it, considering Concordia and Anthea told me it was impolite to stare one time… but I did. I scanned her up and down and couldn't make sense of how her body looked. She was softer, rounder, maybe more sleek in some places than I was. But these things weren't what baffled me most. It was the characteristic of most grown females I had ever seen.  
The two rolling flabs of skin that hung from her chest. They never appealed to me before, and I had never understood why they were there. Touko's made me feel different though. They were softer looking, rounder, more perfect than those of other women. They sat on her chest like overturned tea cups.  
And even that wasn't it; no other females I had ever seen had the two defined dots centered in the middle of the perfect mounds. I wanted to point it out to her and tell her she was a pokemon. She was different and had things normal women didn't have. I opened my mouth to speak but stopped when she yawned.  
I felt the nerve to ask her fade and the wrong words slipped out of my mouth. "Are you tired? You can sleep if you would like." Part of me wanted her to sleep, so I could stare at her in my bed all night long. But the other part knew I might have to listen to her cry while she slept.  
"Yeah… I guess I should go to bed." She opened her eyes and pushed herself up. Her shirt hid the mounds again when she sat. It was too baggy on her to reveal much of her shape below.  
She handed me the stereo remote and started walking away to the door that would take her down the stairs. I didn't turn it off yet; I wanted to watch her leave while the blue light still shone.  
"Good… goodnight Touko." I stuttered. Why had I said she could go to bed? I didn't mean she could leave… I should have been more specific.  
"Good night, N." she whispered before disappearing down the steps.  
I sighed and clicked off the stereo. Something in me felt terribly safe and sound, but part of me wanted to believe I had a hurricane racing through my chest. I laid back against the same pillows she had and breathed in the lingering scent.  
It wasn't long until the darkness engulfed me into sleep.


	7. Chapter 7

~Touko~

I woke feeling more refreshed than I had in a long time. I felt more alive… more airy and blissful than I ever thought I could in a place like this. I rolled to the right, wanting to wrath myself further into the warm fuzzy blankets. I was expecting to get further than I did though, and the hard thing in the way mad me open my eyes.  
"Tate!" I gasped and rolled back the other way, seeing as though I had landed with my face next to his chest on his arm.  
"Well I wasn't expecting that." He spoke in a lovely, confident voice. "But I won't protest if you want to snuggle."  
"No thanks." I hissed, sitting up at glaring down at him. His white hair was sticking out in a bed head kind of way and it was making me think he had been here much longer than just this morning. I felt blood boil in my veins.  
He sat up. "You shouldn't look so surprised; I thought you would get it by now. I'm kinda known for popping up out of no where."  
"I can't get used to waking up and finding a boy in my bed." I glared.  
"What will you ever do when you're married?" he teased. "Anyways, I'm here to offer you something."  
I raised an eyebrow at him.  
"Well two things actually, but I only expect you to want one…"  
"Get on with it."  
"Ok well the first is hot, passionate sex."  
I turned a terrible red and glowered. "I hope that's the one you expect I will say no to." Who did this boy think he was!  
"It is." He waved it away like he had said nothing. "And the second is a pokemon."  
"A… a pokemon?" my defenses fell. "Is it one of my pokemon!"  
"No. But it's foreign, something that will be good in… this environment." He was trying not to give it away, I was dreadfully curious. The only pokemon I had seen since I got here was Zoroark, and that wasn't exactly a walk in the park.  
"What kind of pokemon is it?" I was leaning tours him, looking around the other side of him for a pokeball. He lifted his shirt and revealed the belt that had three pokeballs attacked to it.  
He grabbed the darkest of the three pokeballs. It was a dusk ball. "You need to promise you won't let it get caught." He said before holding the ball out to me.  
"Absolutely." I nodded. "I promise."  
He smiled at me and dropped the ball in the palm of my hand. "Oh and one more thing. His name is Crypt."  
"Crypt?" I echoed the weird name.  
Tate nodded. "A unique name, so every time you have this pokemon with you, you will think of me."  
"Why would I want to do that?"  
He flashed his brilliant white teeth at me. "Just let him out already."  
I took a deep breath and looked up at the submarine door separating N's room from mine.  
"He is out checking the workers right now." Tate said, seeing my hesitation. He sat up and folded his legs. "Let him out!"  
I looked down at the dusk ball for a long moment, trying to memorize the way it felt to hold a pokeball in my hands. I studied the dark shade of gray and finally clicked the button. The pokeball swelled.  
"I hope you like him." Tate said suddenly, in a more realistic tone.  
"Why are you doing this?" I stalled. "Why are you giving me a pokemon?"  
He smiled at me. "Just trying to serve."  
I shook my head at him, but felt some growing affection for the cocky boy. The thought! Someone like him would like someone like me enough to get me a pokemon. And not just a pokemon. But a foreign pokemon! I had always wanted one.  
I hit the button again to let the pokemon out. A dark eerie purple light erupted. The room seemed to grow heavier, the air a little tighter as all the energy centered to the pokemon. My chest felt slightly tight as I squinted to make out the shape of the pokemon.  
I didn't see anything, just merely felt strange waves of anxiety come over me. The hair on my arms stood on end.  
"It's ok Crypt." Tate said. "You don't have to be scared."  
Almost at once then, a pokemon manifested itself to us. He was just a smoky mass of purple and black at first, but then solidified into something more understandable. I could see a cautious grin, the shape of a witch's hat on its round head, but most importantly a pair of stunning silver eyes. I had never seen a pokemon like that before, but it was surprisingly beautiful… just like Tate, with the same eyes and everything.  
"What type of pokemon is he?" I asked Tate once the heaviness of the room lifted off my chest.  
"A Mismagius. A Ghost type; as frightening as they can get." He winked.  
"Aww… no." I crooned, holding my hand up to the feathery, almost transparent pokemon. "You don't look very scary."  
The pokemon flitted tours me and made a strange noise, something I couldn't understand. All I knew was that it sounded happy and it echoed slightly. I held my hand up to it as it floated to me. I waited for it to reach out and touch me; to accept me, but it just stared, almost like it was confused.  
I stretched my hand forward to pet it and found that sticking my hand tours the pokemon made its smoke-like body separate. It swirled around my fingers and I could feel all its energy, yet I couldn't feel anything but a strange heaviness on my fingers.  
"Never had a Ghost type before have you?" Tate snorted. "You really can't pet them. Well… you wouldn't know if you were or not."  
"What do you mean?" I kept my eyes on Crypt as he curled his eerie body around my shoulders and tickled the back of my neck with energy. It was true, I had never had a ghost pokemon before, so I wasn't exactly sure what to expect.  
"They can feel us, but we really can't feel them." He explained. "I specialize in ghost type pokemon from foreign countries."  
"That's so cool." I was intrigued with the tingling sensation Crypt was giving off. Despite its creepy exterior, he seemed to be really sweet. His atmosphere had completely changed from dark to soothing as soon as he showed himself to me.  
Tate smiled hugely at me. "Have you ever heard of Gengar?"  
"Yes." I nodded, remembering a childhood story about how if you were bad a Gengar would come give you nightmares while you slept.  
"I have one." He was proud; I could see it in his silver eyes. "And a Froslass."  
"I've never heard of that one."  
"I'm not surprised, it's pretty rare. A ghost and an ice type."  
I looked at Tate and couldn't stop the smile from creeping over my mouth. I shook my head. "And here I thought you where just a pain in the butt."  
He grew more genuine now. "I can't really help you out of here, or get you your other pokemon, but this is the least I can do… for now."  
"I appreciate it…" I looked back at Crypt and he stared at me with those silver eyes. "He is such a sweetheart." Crypt blinked at me and was smiling. He made a purring kind of noise, but higher pitched.  
"I thought so… its hard to find a docile ghost type… most of them just seem to want to cause trouble, so when I found this one I just had to catch it." Tate explained. "But I wasn't exactly ready to take on another one right now, because I raise pokemon one at a time rather than as a team… so I figured he would be a good friend for you."  
"He is perfect."  
"And he doesn't need to eat, and he can make himself pretty much invisible so no trouble hiding him around Lord N."  
This was absolutely perfect… Some strange high filled my chest and I felt tears rising in my eyes. It may have just been the fact that I was looking at a pokemon besides Zoroark in what felt like a lifetime, or maybe just all the built up emotions this place made me have. Either way I had to let a tear or two fall before wiping my eyes and laughing a shaky laugh.  
"Thank you, Tate." I choked out.  
He shifted to be on his knees and he leaned over to me. Crypt flitted out from between us in a split second so he wouldn't get caught in the embrace. I didn't push Tate away as he hugged me. It was strange to me that I barely knew him, and yet it somehow felt like we had been friends as long as me and Cheren or Bianca had been.  
It was a quick hug that only lasted a second before he pulled away. "You're welcome Touko. Take good care of him ok?"  
I nodded and wiped my face once more.  
"I have to go ok? Lord N should be coming back soon." He turned to Crypt. "You be good. Don't screw around too much and don't get caught."  
Crypt nodded and nuzzled Tate in farewell.  
"Come back soon." I said as he Crypt pulled back and started to flicker.  
Tate winked at me before disappearing.

…..

I had showered in the accompaniment of Crypt, which was a little weird at first, but he wasn't fazed by my lack of clothes or the steamy room. I got the idea he liked it by the way he was swooshing around happily and making adorable little noises. He couldn't have been a very old pokemon, but not a baby either. My kind of pokemon, energetic and faithful.  
He would disappear and reappear perfectly around the grunts as we walked down the hall way. Most of them ignored me, but I could see a couple stiffen, as if they weren't prepared for the heaviness of the room when Crypt was in it. No one said anything though.  
I pushed the huge door open to go into my room and found a tray of food on the edge of the bed, the basket of clothes neatly folded, and a little note folded next to it. I went over quickly, some little part inside of me fluttering with the hope of it being from Tate. I wasn't sure if it was his gifts, or his too-cool attitude, or maybe just the idea that he can help me out of here that was making me think about him more than necessary, but I couldn't help myself.  
Crypt did the trick too… every time I saw him, or felt his presence next to me I would think of Tate. This left me worried that some other emotion was coming over me. I had to focus on getting out of here… but then again… Tate was an excellent outlet. If he would just be a little more willing…  
I noticed there was a little Hershey kiss sitting on the note. It had to be Tate. I unfolded it quickly and read.

Come upstairs…?  
N…

I hadn't thought about it being N to write me a note… something in my chest fluttered and I smiled. He may not be some gorgeous boy but he was starting to grow on me. Something about him made me wonder if he was really as crazy as he seemed… or that he truly believed in his ways so much it WAS that way.  
And so the water was calling the fire… right? I looked up at the submarine door, surprised to see it open. Was this just a bad omen? Was water trying to lure me in and put me out in its lair? I shook my head knowing that I was analyzing things too much.  
I looked at the tray of food and reached down for the bottle of water. They fed me way too much here. I wasn't hungry in the slightest… and I had a hard time eating when I wasn't hungry. Unless it was something along the lines of chocolate. Which there was. I snatched the Hershey kiss and put it in my pocket.  
Crypt wafted over to me and looked down at the note in my hand. He cocked his head to the side, knowing that he couldn't say anything while N was in the room. N was too sensitive to pokemon… I didn't need to give him even the slightest chance of finding Crypt.  
"Stay down here ok?" I whispered. Crypt nodded, his silver eyes sparkling. They were always the last thing to go before he disappeared.  
I walked over to the staircase, unwinding the top off the water bottle and taking a swig. I made sure my throat was clear before speaking. "N?" I called on my way up, stopping to peek over the edge before finishing the climb.  
He was sitting on his bed. I knew from lying on it last night it was the most comfortable thing I had ever let myself on before. It was so comfortable it should be illegal. His emerald eyes came up to see me waiting. He smiled.  
"Come in."  
I walked up the last few steps and came up on his floor. I took another drink of water, feeling nervous all of the sudden. My chest was tight, but not in the way it was when Crypt came around. It was just… nervous. I shook myself and came over.  
"Hi…" I said awkwardly and shifted to be sitting on the edge of the bed.  
N's smile was breathtaking. Unlike Tate's it was pure… simple… sweet. "Hi." He breathed.  
I capped the water bottle quickly and set it down. I focused on the note in my hand. "Did you need something?" I made it obvious I was talking about the note.  
"No." N shook his head. "I… I just like seeing you."  
"Oh…" I didn't look up. "Well… I like seeing you too." I didn't understand the truth to my own words until they were out.  
"Really?" his shocked voice was so unexpected. I couldn't get used to how he didn't think much of himself. I didn't understand why either.  
I nodded and decided to change the subject. "How was the runaround this morning?" he always made his way around the castle before settling down for the day to do paperwork, or call people on the phone. It was strange that he wasn't doing anything now.  
"Fine… I caught some grunts not doing what they were supposed to… so I wrote them up." He didn't look happy with himself, and I got the idea that he didn't like making people upset. Ghetsis was the one who probably made it mandatory to write people up when they were off track.  
"Oh… what were they doing?"  
N shook his head. "Just… putting their arms around each other and holding hands and stuff."  
"They must be going out." I felt an inpatients growing in me. "You didn't have to write them up for that."  
"What does that mean?" he cocked his head to the side. "Going out?"  
I blushed, wondering what I had gotten myself into. "It's just a term to say when two people are a couple. When they're dating."  
He wasn't satisfied. He didn't understand.  
"Like when a boy and a girl really like each other?" I pushed. "They go out, they hold hands, kiss, they do couple stuff."  
"Human things." He assumed.  
"Not always… I mean, in the terms yes, but pokemon love each other too." I felt a swell of sadness for Mienshao and Scrafty. Though Mienshao had always been more into battling and being loyal, rather than being with Scrafty… the two had always had something special. Scrafty was in love with her since the day she beat him in battle, allowing me to capture him.  
Did Scrafty know she was gone? I looked down, the loneliness' growing bigger than it had in a while.  
"Pokemon love each other…" N said. It wasn't a question, but not a statement either. It was like he was thinking very hard about something. "But not pokemon of different species."  
"What does that have to do with anything?" I looked up in surprise.  
"Well… electric pokemon don't take a liking to ground types do they?" this time it was a question. "Like how Butterfree… they only have courtship with other butterfree…"  
"That's not true. Scrafty and Mienshao loved each other…" I whispered.  
"They were both fighting types though." N said. "That's why."  
"No, you don't get it." I shook my head. "Just because that's what normally happens with pokemon love doesn't mean it always happens. And with people… there are plenty of different interspecies."  
"I don't understand what you mean by that." N was slightly frustrated. His brow furrowed and he perched his lips.  
"Well… you know the gym leader Lenora, right?"  
He nodded with hesitation.  
"She is black. And her husband is white, but they still love each other. You see? Just because they look different doesn't mean they are different on the inside."  
"But they aren't pokemon." N challenged.  
I wasn't sure how to approach this. "Well…" I thought carefully before speaking. "I'm a fire type. Right?" even the words felt weird to me, and I was the one saying them.  
He nodded again, keeping his face hard.  
"But say… I was in love with…" I racked my brain. Tate! "Say I was in love with a… an ice type." It was the only reasonable explanation for his wintry appeal. Even if this was all hypothetical.  
N looked horrified. It made me wonder if somehow he knew about Tate. Of course I didn't really love him! I just thought he was attractive… and slightly annoying. But how would N know? He couldn't… not with Tate being so secretive all the time.  
"That's like an Emboar loving a Beartic." He sounded strained. "It's not possible."  
"N… I get the feeling you don't really know what love is…"  
His face fell for a long moment, his hair covered his eyes and I couldn't help but wonder how a guy could pull off that long hair like that, let alone green! I had never found any guys with long hair attractive. I thought about Tate having long hair and shivered. No, his short, thick bed-head hair was perfect. Cheren? That was even worse than thinking of Tate with long hair. It would look like an oil slick.  
N peeked up at me with one eye and the same quiet hesitation made me wonder where the brave and confident king was. "Teach me?" he suggested.  
I stared in disbelief. "I don't think I can just teach you what love is… It's not something you can explain. It's something you have to learn for yourself."  
"But… that doesn't make any sense." He pulled his face up. "What does it feel like?"  
"Well… it's kind of like… I… I guess it's like…" I looked around the room trying to find anything to make it possible to explain. It was like I had the words on the tip of my tongue but couldn't get them out. The stereotype for love… I mean, it was easy. Butterfree in your stomach, putting the one you love ahead of yourself, doing anything to make them happy and keep them safe. But as far as feeling? Just plain… straight emotion? I realized I didn't know.  
"Have you ever been in love?" N asked me.  
I shook my head and spoke maybe too loudly. "No. I've never even had my first kiss."  
Bianca, even SHE knew what it felt like to be kissed on the lips. The closest I had ever come was when a too-friendly trainer had thanked me with a kiss on the cheek for healing his pokemon with one of my potions. And that was nothing.  
"Sure you have." N laughed. It wasn't often he did that, so the musical sound was strange in my ears. I wasn't sure actually… if I had ever heard it before. I locked it away in my brain for safe keepings.  
"No, I haven't." I assured.  
"I gave you one with the note." N blinked, probably thinking I was short of memory.  
Now it was my turn to laugh. I rolled my eyes and felt a faint blush rise to my cheeks as I dug through my pocket for the Hershey kiss. I held it out and examined the red paper it was wrapped in. "This is a Hershey kiss, N. Not a real kiss."  
"What's the difference?"  
"A real kiss is when you…" I scrunched up my face. "Well there are a lot of different kinds of kisses. There is a kiss on the cheek, and a regular kiss, and a French kiss… Eskimo kisses, Butterfree kisses." I tried to remember all of them.  
"What is a Butterfree kiss?" N perked up at the sound of pokemon. Again I rolled my eyes. He looked like a Lilipup that wanted to go out every time a pokemon was mentioned in conversation.  
"It's when someone flutteres there eyelashes against you." I explained. "And an Eskimo kiss is when you rub your nose with someone else's."  
Did anyone else think it was weird I was explaining these things to a pretty much full grown man? This bothered me… I wasn't sure why, but it was somehow amusing and adorable. I looked at N as he experimentally fluttered his lashes against the back of his hand.  
"Why do they call it butterfree kisses?" he scowled.  
"Because it's supposed to feel like Butterfree wings."  
He nodded. "What is just a regular kiss then?"  
I realized I probably should have started with that one, just so it would go over easier. I twisted my mouth in thought, thinking that the simplest way to explain had to be the best.  
"It's when you put your mouth to someone else's. But most of the time a guy only puts his to a girls, and a girl only puts her to guy. And you don't do this with just anyone; you would do that with a boyfriend or girlfriend, or your husband or wife."  
He was overwhelmed; I could see it all trying to sink in and getting stuck in the drain. There was something blocking that drain from letting human things, normal things, sink in. I sighed.  
"When you really care about someone; a girl..." I made it clear I was speaking as if it was him in the situation. "And she really cares about you, you would become more than friends. You would become boyfriend and girlfriend."  
He assumed. "I would be the boyfriend?"  
"Right." I was talking a lot with my hands. "And if you really like her, I mean… if you REALLY like her, then you start to love her. And when you love someone you marry them. She would become your wife, and you would be her husband."  
"So it's like evolving?"  
"No!" I wanted to smack him in the head. "It has nothing to do with evolving. Loving someone can change you, yes. But on the inside, not the outside."  
He was concentrating very hard. "What if you love more than one person? Because I love a lot of pokemon and—  
"That's a different kind of love. I love pokemon too, but not in a romantic way. Not in the kind of way that you would kiss them." I shivered at the thought. Beastiality… ugh.  
"So pokemon don't love each other in that kind of way… at all?" N looked disappointed.  
"No, pokemon can love each other like that. But people and pokemon cant."  
He sighed with relief. "Oh… good."  
"Why?"  
"Because I want to know what it feels like to love." He smiled a boyish grin at me. "And I am a pokemon."  
My stomach flipped upside down. "No… N!" I groaned. "You're not—  
"Yes I am."  
"But you are in a human body, which means you have to behave like a human. And humans don't love pokemon like that."  
"But I do…"  
"No you don't, you don't know what that kind of love is.—his face fell—I don't either so don't worry."  
He looked me in the eyes. "You are a pokemon too though… you don't love any other pokemon?"  
"No, N. I'm not a pokemon."  
"But you are!"  
"No, I told you I'm not! Get it through your head ok? I AM HUMAN."  
His lip stuck out slightly, pouting and crossing his arms over his chest. "Do you love humans?"  
I was caught off guard. "Well… not yet, I haven't found anyone I like enough to love."  
"See! You are a pokemon!"  
"Not YET! N. One day I will find the person I love, and I can guarantee you it will be a human being."  
He scowled. "How can you know that?"  
I through my arms up and let them come collapsing down in my lap, exasperated. "Alright let's talk about something else huh?" I suggested.  
"Alright… tell me what a french kiss is." He asked. "You forgot that one."  
I turned cherry red. "I think you should just forget I said anything about that one."  
"Is it bad?"  
"No… just, not really easy to explain."  
"Do people French kiss?"  
"Yes…" I swallowed.  
"Can you show me, instead of explaining it?"  
My face must have been glowing. I had to fight down a nervous smile. "Uhh… no." I coughed and started unwrapping the Hershey kiss, just to have something to do rather than look him in the eyes.  
"Do you know how?"  
I glared at him. "You sure ask a lot of questions. And… no I don't know how." That wasn't entirely a lie… I hadn't ever done it before, but I knew how it worked. The thought of showing N baffled me into laughing a humorless laugh. Was that even possible? For the first time I really did wonder if N was human or not. The poor guy was just so… out of this world. I felt like I was trying to find a balloon thousands of feet into the air and bring it back down to earth before altitude made it pop.  
"Do you want to leave?"  
My heart skipped a beat. "Leave and go back down to my room…? Or leave as in get out of this place for good?"  
"Go down to your room."  
"Oh… well then, no, not really." I popped the kiss in my mouth and enjoyed it more than I should have. It still surprised me that N thought this was the only kind of kiss… a chocolate one. I giggled.  
"What's so funny?" he huffed a laugh.  
"Nothing. Nothing." I shook my head. "You just make me laugh."  
"Is that a good or a bad thing?" he wasn't sure, but he wanted to laugh too. His eyes showed a huge amount of humor.  
"A good thing…" I wasn't sure myself, but why would I disappoint such a face? He was beaming.  
"I have more of those." He slid of the bed and walked over to a large, golden dresser. It looked too modern sitting across from the piano. He opened one of the side doors and reached in to grab the bag of Hershey kisses before returning to me.  
"You're like a little kid that hordes candy." I scoffed as he sat next to me and made himself comfortable. I pulled my legs away from the end of the bed and sat cross legged facing him.  
"These make people happy." N smirked, knowing what I said was true. "I like giving people kisses."  
He opened the bag with his long fingers and pulled out a swirled red and silver wrapped kiss. Gently, holding it by the little tag, he set it on my knee.  
"Hershey kisses, N. Hershey." I plucked the candy off of me and started to unwrap it.  
He gave me a smile and pushed the bag over to me.  
"I'm not eating all those." I laughed, pulling the chocolate from the wrapper and popping it in my mouth. This one had white chocolate in it. Even though I said this I reached for another.  
He chuckled softly.  
"If you keep giving me these we will need a work out room." I shook my head, wondering why I was doing this to myself. Was I so depressed being here I had to eat sweets? No…  
"We can bring you anything you want on this floor." N assured. "We will get you a gym."  
I unwrapped this chocolate and held it gently on the tip of my finger. I was going to argue and say my own gym was unnecessary, but the desire to run came over me. Run for like two or three miles on a treadmill. It would probably help out with some of the stress from being here, plus if I was planning on escaping, I wouldn't be going down without a fight. I would have to be in top physical condition.  
I looked down at the Hershey kiss on my finger and scowled. My motives shifted otherwise and I suddenly didn't want the delicious treat.  
"Why don't you eat it?" N asked, seeing my discomfort.  
"Why don't you eat it?" I challenge, bringing the chocolate up to him. He took it with a smile and put it in his mouth.  
"Am I allowed to give you other kinds of kisses?" N asked after he swallowed and licked his lips.  
My stomach flipped. "No!"  
He frowned. "Why… why not? You like Hershey kisses, and I like making you happy."  
"Remember what I told you about who you give kisses to?" I said sternly, trying to hide the shock of him even thinking about it. "Your girl friend or your wife."  
"And I have to really like someone to he their… boyfriend?" he assumed, reaching into the bag and pulling out another kiss.  
"Right." I nodded. "And they have to really like you to be your girlfriend."  
"I think I get it now. Well, Touko I really like you. You could be my girlfriend." His eyes were bright as he brought the Hershey kiss up to my face, pinched between his thumb and finger.  
"No I can't." I didn't even hesitate. He was crazy! "We are rivals, N."  
A sudden flood of depressed came over him and he dropped his hand, staring down at the kiss with a sigh. Why did he have to look so helpless? I curled my lip and looked at him, growing impatient when he refused to look at me. Why me? I groaned internally. Why, of all the people, why ME, did he have to decide to like.  
Although… N really didn't understand what it meant to be a boyfriend of girlfriend. He didn't know what love was. He probably didn't even know what it meant to be attracted to someone. I felt like N and I were completely different. It was almost like he really was a pokemon.  
"Aw, come on. Don't look so depressed." I reached forward at the kiss in his hand and took it, using a little effort to pry it away from his fingers.  
He let me take it without arguing, but still wouldn't look at me.  
I sighed… how could I do this to him? How could I make him suffer more than he already had? Liberation or not, he was just a lonely child-hearted boy with nothing but an abusive father and too much power.  
I brought the Hershey kiss up to his mouth and tried to make him eat it. He just pulled his face away though and ignored the offer. I scowled and reached out to take his chin in my other hand. His torso was taller than mine so I had to look up at him when his face turned back to mine.  
"We can still be friends…" I suggested. Was it right? COULD I be friends with my rival?  
There was the temptation to brighten in his eyes and he opened his mouth to speak. I shoved the Hershey kiss in before he got the chance.  
It worked, his face lightened up and he laughed, turning a gentle pink color. He chewed slowly and then swallowed "You gave me a kiss."  
"A Hershey kiss, N." I corrected. "As in a chocolate, named after a kiss."  
He just smiled at me. "We're friends?"  
I rolled my eyes. "Alright… yes."  
His eyes lit up.  
"We're friends."


	8. Chapter 8

~N~

"Zoroark!" I yelled, throwing open the door to the play room and running tours the back to where he usually slept. He was curled up in a heap of stuffed pokemon, his face groggy at the sound of my voice.  
What do you want? I was sleeping.  
His mind was clear and vibrant like always. Zoroark was the easiest of all pokemon for me to hear. He was my friend. My favorite, very best, pokemon friend.  
"Zoroark!" I flopped down beside him in the heap and looked over excitedly. "Me and Touko are friends."  
So…?  
His spirits fell at the sound of her name. Zoroark thought Touko hated him for killing Mienshao. But I knew it was just an accident. Even so, his words hurt.  
"So?" I echoed. "That's all you have to say? She is my friend. Aren't you happy for me?" I didn't understand… Zoroark was always happy for me when I did things I was proud of. And I was very proud of being friends with Touko.  
I'm your friend and you don't seem to be all that excited.  
"Zoroark!" I pouted. "You know you are my best pokemon friend…"  
I thought she was a pokemon too?  
His voice was so bitter. "What did I do wrong?" I asked. "Why are you mad at me, Zoroark?"  
Just leave me alone and let me sleep.  
Zoroark had never told me to leave before… An aching filled my chest and I hated myself almost instantly. I'm a pokemon! I'm not a human who is mean to pokemon! Why is Zoroark mad at me?  
"I… I'm sorry Zoroark." I whimpered. "Whatever I did… I'm sorry."  
Has she forgiven you, N?  
"No… but why are you—  
Don't talk to me about friendship if she won't even forgive you… if she won't forgive me…  
I hadn't even thought about that… Was she still not forgiving me? It hadn't come up in quite sometime I was surprised… She wouldn't have forgotten about the whole situation… Maybe she did forgive me and just didn't tell me yet.  
"Why is that upsetting you?" I asked Zoroark. "She will forgive you… I know she will."  
Sure. Whatever you say.  
I frowned and repeated. "I know she will!"  
Just go away…  
My chest grew all tight again and my lip quivered ever so slightly. "Don't be mad at me… please…"  
He didn't say anything, just buried his face further into the mass of fluff and fake fur.  
"fi—fine." I choked out. "I wi—will le—leave." Some strange betrayal came over me and tears swelled in my eyes. I'm not a human… I'm not mean to pokemon. I love pokemon. I AM A POKEMON!  
Tears streaming from my eyes I stood and ran back out of the room. What if Touko was right?  
What if I am a human?

~Touko~

"So what do you do during the day?" I asked, happy to see Tate once again. He hadn't shown up since the day he gave me Crypt, and that was two days ago. It seemed like a much longer time than it should have.  
But maybe I was just lonely…  
N had been avoiding me for the last two days as well. I didn't understand, he had been so happy to know I was his friend. Then all of the sudden it was just gone. It was like we never had that time in his bedroom.  
Crypt curled up between Tate and me on the bed, wafting around like a ball of mist and enjoying whatever warmth our bodies gave off.  
"I'm a trainer of course." Tate lifted his hand from behind his head and ran it over the top of Crypt, making him make that strange high pitched purring noise again. "I travel mostly, looking for Ghost pokemon all over the world."  
I stared at the ceiling, wondering what it must be like to just travel wherever you wanted in the blink of an eye.  
"What about your family?" I asked him. "Don't you ever see them?" the pang of home-sickness hit me for a brief moment.  
"Nahh… they knew when I signed up for team Plasma it would be safest for me not to see them… The last time I saw my family, just my brother actually, was when I happen to be in Nimbasa when he was passing through." There was a hidden emotion in his eyes, something beyond what I could grasp.  
"Did you talk to him?" I asked.  
He shook his head. "It… it would have caused more problems than it was worth. So I just fallowed him around for a day to see how he was doing. He is a trainer too."  
"Does he specialize in anything like you?"  
Tate laughed. "He… has always had this crazy fascination with flying… I expect it's because he wants to fly away from my mother like I did. We never got along, but we had the same goal in mind. He could have joined team Plasma as well, but he wanted to be a trainer right at the moment… when becoming part of the shadow triad would have taken time."  
I couldn't believe how unbelievably sad Tate looked for a split second. I got this terrible feeling of dread and even Crypt stopped to stare at the bad emotions, feeding off them.  
I was just about to ask Tate what was wrong when he pulled his hand over and set it on mine. Crypt swooshed out of the way, getting separated for a split second then morphing back together near our feet. I blushed.  
"It's hard for me to admit I wasn't as ambitious as my younger brother." He spoke as if he hadn't been touching my hand. Too confident… "I wanted mystery… I wanted something beyond what I could grasp at the moment and the thought of being part of Plasma gave me a cheap satisfaction. My brother was different. More wholesome."  
"Why is that? Just because you didn't have the same idea of training in mind." I said this, but I was really thinking that Tate must have been pretty stupid to just join Plasma like that. He must have known there goal in mind?  
"My younger brother was always the hero, I was always the villain." He forced a sad smile on his face. "And he was right to refuse team Plasma… he's still out there somewhere… living his dream."  
"But you get to travel." I pulled my hand out from under his and propped myself up on my elbow to look at him. His silver eyes blazed, making my head feel full of air. "Aren't you living your dream right now?"  
Tate hesitated in a very normal kind of way, not in a gorgeous model-boy kind of way. He could have spoken his mind, I would have understood, but he didn't. I grew suspicious.  
"At this very moment… yes I am living my dream." He smiled a wide, white smile at me. It was forced though, fake.  
"Then what's the problem?" I didn't want to just come right out and say that I knew he was lying to me. His eyes betrayed him.  
"The problem is… is that the choices I made before will effect the dream I want to live in the future." He didn't look at me as he spoke. His voice was hard, hiding the lie.  
"Is it because you are part of team Plasma?" I asked.  
Tate shut his eyes and brought is arm up. He pinched the bridge of his nose between his fingers and took a long, deep breath. "Listen Touko, I have to go."  
"Wait, why?"  
But he was already flickering.  
"You can tell me!" I yelled too late.  
I glared at the empty space next to me. Crypt slid over my body and gave me chills. The equivalent of a hug… a very cold, ghostly hug, but a hug none the less. I didn't feel quite so alone with him there… but still depressed.  
"Why does he do that Crypt?" I whispered.  
Crypt made no noise, but looked at me with sympathetic eyes. They were the same… silver, glorious and beautiful like Tate's, but with more glowing capabilities. His shape started to fade and I knew N must be around.  
I sighed and let him disappear before forcing myself to look normal. I rolled over onto my back in my huge bed and thought about Cheren and Bianca. They were always the direction my thoughts went in when I needed something to keep my mind busy.  
Cheren is planning my escape right now as I lay here…  
Bianca is home, chained to her bed where she is safe with her paranoid father watching her like a Braviary…  
I heard the sound of the huge door unlock, but I didn't look over to see it was N coming in. He was always done with his work around this time every evening.  
"Touko…" He spoke to me for the first time in two days. I almost jumped with surprise, but caught myself.  
I looked over at him and his nervous figure as he walked over to me. "Are you still my friend?" he said bluntly, but full of emotion.  
I sat up and adjusted my shirt so it wasn't crooked and rumpled from lying in bed all day. "Yeah, why do you ask?"  
"I haven't been a very good friend." He stalled at the foot of my bed, one hand in his pocket. "I shouldn't be ignoring you…"  
"Well, then why are you?" I knew I hadn't done anything wrong, so I was still confused. My voice wasn't angry or prying, just mildly curious.  
"I… I've been busy." He lied about as good as a Basculin could walk on land.  
Even so, I took this as apology. He probably was doing something important, though I wasn't sure why that involved ignoring me. He hadn't even been playing his piano at night… something else was going on, but I decided not to ask.  
"Its ok." I allowed. "I've been… doing alright." I didn't want to make it sound like I wasn't lonely. With Crypt around and waiting for Tate I really didn't get bothered by the lack of company. But he didn't need to know that.  
N looked more troubled than he should. He pulled his shaky hand from his pocket and set a Hershey kiss down at the foot of my bed.  
"I'm sorry." He whispered. There was some other meaning to his words, I just couldn't understand…  
"I'm sorry for ignoring you…" he clarified. "And… I'm mostly sorry about your Mienshao."  
My heart ached at the name. I had done such a good job of locking all emotions that concerned her away; I was struck like a balloon filled with too much air, getting poked by a needle.  
N stared at me for a long minute, his emerald eyes flickering to the Hershey kiss. I knew what he wanted now. The same thing he had wanted since the day I got here. Three little words.  
I. Forgive. You.  
I looked up at him and something in me snapped. I crawled to the edge of the bed and grabbed the Hershey kiss. I slipped it into my pocket and got to my knees. I looked up at him.  
Mienshao would want me to be happy… She would want me to forgive him.  
I bit my lip and squeezed my eyes shut, wishing that it could be anyone else in this world…  
Even Tate I could have spared this apology from.  
But not N… not while he was just too innocent and completely shattered; whether he knew it or not.  
"I… I forgive you." I whispered so softly I wasn't sure he heard.  
"What?" N stepped closer to the edge of the bed. With me on my knees we were the same height.  
I looked into his sad emerald eyes and inched closer to the end of the bed. I wasn't sure what I was thinking but again… something in me had snapped.  
"I forgive you!" I shouted and threw my arms around his neck. My heart broke into its final pieces and I started to cry, letting out all those emotions of missing Mienshao flood the gates. My nose ran and my tears soaked N's shoulder as he stood rigid, trying to understand what was going on.  
Every wanting plea to get out of here, every lonely and lost thought in my brain, every tantalizing desire to run and never come back hit me so hard I was breathless. All the pain just came pouring out until I couldn't even make sense of my scrambled thoughts.  
Ever so slightly N's hands came up to my back and wrapped around me, holding me more securely than I thought he was capable of. His long fingers uncurled and slid down the length of my shoulders, rubbing in slow circles.  
"You—you don't have to forgive me." N, despite it being what he wanted, told me otherwise. He was obviously confused with my sudden gushing.  
He didn't understand that this was exactly what I DID want. To forgive and forget.  
I pressed my forehead to his neck and sobbed into his chest. How did all this happen? One minute I'm lounging in bed with Tate, listening to him lie and me accepting it, and the next I'm clutching onto my rival, bawling my eyes out.  
Former rival…  
Quite a few long minutes went by before I was able to let the image of Mienshao slip through my mind and calm down. I gathered myself and reduced the flooding to nothing more than just hiccups and gasps every few seconds. I wasn't sure I could speak yet, but I pulled back anyways and sat on the edge of the bed, not looking up at N.  
"Are—are we still friends?" N forced the words out once again.  
Despite my episode I managed a deep breath and then laughed half heartedly. I was breathless and shaking violently, but it struck me funny… that no matter how obvious I made our friendship he was still concerned.  
I looked up at him with my itchy, red eyes and bit my lower lip. He was waiting, staring at me expectantly.  
"I'm sor—  
"We're friends N." I interrupted him. It was the only thing I could get out of my mouth.  
And to think… maybe even just a week ago I hated him with all my heart. All I knew was that I was losing it. I was becoming soft, something no one had ever considered me. It was also painfully aware to me that I needed this.  
It was a bittersweet release of emotions as I remembered all the times me and Mienshao had spent together. I remembered finding her, tossing acorns back and fourth when Dewott was the baby of the family, battling with all our might and winning in the end. I remembered when she evolved from a quite Mienfoo into the strong and proud Mienshao she was. A tear fell for that one…  
I tried to remember how it felt to brush her long fur back with my fingertips. I tried to think of all the nights we spent camping out when I first started training, since I hadn't enough money to afford a hotel room. She never complained.  
With all the good came the bad though. I remembered the day she had lost her and Scrafty's egg to the winter. I blamed myself for a long time, thinking that I could have prevented it if I wasn't so stubborn and headstrong. She taught me a great deal about patients and ambition just the same.  
But most of all the painful, heart wrenching memory of her being blasted to death right in front of my eyes flooded my memory. This was what I had locked up the most. Every detail of her bloody exterior was burning into my mind and once I let it out it just got stuck and wouldn't go away. I was lucky I could remember her before her death at all.  
N turned and sat on the edge of the bed, looking at me with troubled eyes. They were the opposite of Tate's. They were warm and flourishing in color.  
"Why are you crying?" N asked me. His hand lifted tours me, but he dropped it down again.  
Why was I crying? Was it because I was thinking of all those unpleasant things? Or was it because of all the good things? Had I put too much time into keeping her off my mind that this was the price I was going to pay now?  
I knew none of this was true.  
I was crying because the part of me that wanted to hate N for what happened was gone. I was crying because, despite my best efforts, I was giving into the desire to let go. I knew it didn't make any sense… not even to me it didn't. But what was I supposed to do?  
I looked at N, the replacement of Mienshao. He was what pushed those regrets away. HE was what freed me from the curse of never letting go. Somehow my enemy had become my savior.  
I leaned over and pressed my cheek to his arm. I took in shaky, ragged breaths, but was happy to just be breathing at all. The tears were few and far between, but when they fell, they came shamelessly.  
"I—ju—just… let it go." I trembled. "Ever—everythi—thing."  
I knew N didn't understand, I knew he never would, but I appreciated the silence as I just pressed my face further into his shoulder. He brought his hand up and placed it on my shoulder.  
"I'm—ok. Rea—really." I promised. And I was. If ever since the day I was stuck here, I was ok today. I was even better than three nights ago when N had made me laugh and smile with his boyish nature.  
"You're crying though." N was a statue as he spoke, still unsure of me with my head on his shoulder.  
"Some—sometimes it's oh- ok to cry… it lets everything out."  
"Let's what out?" he asked.  
I just shook my head. "Everything…


	9. Chapter 9

The night had been relatively quiet, despite my breakdown. I was exhausted, and N's piano playing put me right to sleep. I was happy he was playing it again… I was happy he took my forgiveness as security.  
I was mostly proud of myself though. I brought myself down to the fiery pits of Hell, and having gone so low, now I was bringing myself up. Lucky for me, it was the only direction to go.  
I rolled over the next morning, well adjusted to the way it felt to have so much room to just sprawl out and stretch. I groaned, everything pulling as far as it could. My ankles popped and the slight stiffness in my shoulders vanished. I went limp then and sighed before opening my eyes.  
"Good morning Miss Touko." Concordia's muted voice came from the royal blue couch across the room facing the huge window. She looked back at me and smiled. "N requested I let you sleep as long as you liked. He told me to wait until you woke up on your own and then he asked me to bring you to him."  
I squinted, looking at the already growing sun in the sky. How late had I slept? "Oh… Kay?" I said strangely, pulling myself up into a sitting position. Concordia smiled cheerily.  
"Why does he want you to bring me to him?" I asked, sliding off the end of the bed and moving with quick movements to the basked of clean clothes around the other side of the bed.  
"I think he just wants you with him." She shrugged, honestly not knowing. "It was a king's order though, I can't refuse."  
"Well ok then… Where is he?" I looked up at the submarine door. It was closed and I knew he was probably out doing his patrol.  
"He should be on the sixth or fifth floor by now." She mused. "He didn't start his patrol as early this morning; I suppose he wanted you to wake up first."  
"But… why?" I said, though I was tingling on the inside. I didn't have to stay on this floor!  
All the possible ways of escape went through my mind and I could hardly contain myself. N was really taking me out of this room… he was taking me to another floor, a floor with potential.  
"I don't know exactly Miss Touko." She said with a flick of her wrist. "Get dressed quickly now and we can get going."  
I stared at the basket of clothes, fishing through it for anything less offensive than gray and white and light blue. It was all so… so bland. I was going to give up and just wear the usual when I spotted the little spaghetti-strap dress that was still folded at the bottom. Black…  
I picked the dress out from the bottom and held it up. If I was going to make my escape today—doubt flickered in my chest—I could at least do it in style.

Concordia waited patiently by the bathroom door as I hastily brushed my teeth and my hair and removed my boring clothes. I stepped into the dress quickly and adjusted the straps to my liking. It was a sweetheart top and criss crossed in the back so that I felt almost cold. But something about it made me smile.  
Who was this girl staring back at me? I blinked.  
A girl who had direction.  
I pulled up a portion of my hair into a pony tail and let the rest fall in loose curls around my shoulders. For the first time in a long time I felt pretty.  
"Coming Miss Touko?" Anthea's impatient tone sounded. I hadn't expected her to be waiting in the hall as well.  
"Sorry." I said as I pushed the bathroom door open and revealed myself to the world. Few grunts stopped to stare, but most everyone didn't seem fazed. Concordia was all smiles; Anthea just seemed ready to go.  
"Put this on Miss Touko… It was an order." Anthea held out a small loop to me and I grabbed it in confusing. It was a wiry type of thing, with a metal clasp on the end of it.  
"What is this?" I asked, seeing as though she was holding the end of it in her hands. I froze.  
"It's just a precaution…" Concordia tried to soothe.  
"A LEASH!" the whole hallway stopped and glared at me as if they needed silence.  
"Oh you have got to be kidding me!" I groaned and slapped my hand against my forehead.  
"Sorry Miss Touko but it was an order." Anthea slipped the end over my wrist and tightened the clasp so it was snug. I realized with a heavy heart that I wasn't going anywhere today, not without dragging N around with me.  
But it was going to be the opposite. N would be dragging ME around.  
"Come now." Concordia at least minded my distress enough to hold my hand as she walked me tours the elevator, rather than hold the leash like Anthea did.  
Once in side I searched desperately around for the place to enter the code. I remembered N telling me if I ever tried to get down off my floor I would need a code. So I watched frantically for the buttons. I could remember it.  
ext… ext… ext…  
Ok so maybe I couldn't. I thought my chances would have been better if it was a key, or a card to swipe or something. I could have managed to steal one from a grunt before memorizing that code.  
The elevator took a lifetime before it settled on floor number eight out of about a hundred. Turns out I was on the fourth to last floor in this castle, what a drag…  
When the doors opened though I found N standing just outside the elevator, leaning against the wall with his arms behind his back. He looked a lot more like a king should, and a flush of memory came. He was still these peoples leader… he was just himself around me and didn't show it.  
Everyone that walked by him bowed their heads and blinked gratefully as if he was a god. He shook someone's hand as we stepped out of the elevator and Anthea held up my leash.  
N turned and his face was hard. "Thank you goddesses; you are dismissed for the day. Enjoy your time off."  
They bowed and disappeared back into the elevator without a word.  
Run run run run run run run. RUN before he grabs your leash. I tried to convince myself of the nerve, but it was too late. He took it securely in his hand and looked down at me.  
The kingly exterior faded, and his expression grew more like what I had come to expect. His vibrant eyes glowed and he was fidgeting nervously. I raised an eyebrow at him.  
"Did you get dressed nicely for me?" he asked, his eyes flickering around. The few grunts at the end of this much larger, much longer hallway weren't paying any attention to us.  
I wasn't about to tell him that I actually got dressed nicely because I wanted to escape in style, so I just shrugged. "I guess I just felt like it."  
His face fell ever so slightly. "I wanted to show you the castle." He said after a second of contemplating.  
I was forced to remember he expected me to stay here for the rest of my life. I flinched. "Oh."  
"Don't you want to see it?"  
"Well…" I looked down and folded my arms till the leash pulled tight. "I guess it's better than being alone all day."  
I wondered if Tate was lying in my bed waiting for me, probably thinking that I was just in the bathroom down the hall. He would be pissed when I didn't show up… he might not even come back. My stomach flipped nervously.  
N took that as a positive thing and pulled the leash up to his elbow. The loop stayed put snugly between his forearm and bicep and he made an attempt to look like we were walking normally.  
"The first few floors are for guests." N started saying as we walked. "Some people, believe it or not, want to stay here. A lot of them are people who want to enroll to be grunts."  
I shook my head. Stupid people…  
"Then there are floors for students who are taking classes. We are just below those… and then meeting rooms, storage rooms, the kitchen and the lounge area… oh and most of the floors are grunt dorms."  
I wondered how he could talk so simply about all of this. To me it seemed like some sort of resort/employment center/business building/hangout/college all wrapped up in a bundle of hell.  
"Then there is the… safe rooms." He bit his lip and I knew that he meant MY room. "And then the sages rooms and on the very top… my room."  
"Safe rooms?" I rolled my eyes. "You mean prison rooms."  
He frowned. "No… our prison is in the basement, below the main lobby."  
I shivered. "Who do you keep down there?"  
"Grunts that misbehave…"  
"Oh…" I was actually surprised. Something had been telling me it was like a dungeon with torture devices. "You're not going to show me that are you?"  
"Oh no!" N shook his head. "I don't go down there… not ever."  
I wasn't going to ask why, but it gave me a bad feeling. What was I missing? N didn't seem all that fazed though, so he probably wasn't lying to me.  
"I wanted to show you my room mostly." He said after I didn't reply. "Is that ok?"  
"Your room as in, the top floor?" I mused, trying to picture a room even more fit for a king than the one he was already in. The only thing I could think of was something without a submarine door.  
He nodded and smiled at me. "But I have to finish checking the first ten floors." He said. "Then we can go up." his eyes danced at the thought.  
All little kids looked like that when then thought of pressing the elevator button that would take them to the very top. I hoped he wasn't going to want to push every button from here to there like a child too…  
It was a relatively quiet walk along the ninth floor, we didn't stop except when N wanted to say hello to someone. His voice was stronger and more dedicated when he spoke to anyone but me. A mask.  
He would introduce me to a couple people every now and again, thought no one looked pleased. I tried to make myself look threatening around the female grunts, and attractive around the males. There was a strange high in me as their eyes bugged out of their heads to see what I was wearing.  
N surprised me by tugging on my leash once to get me to hurry along and leave a younger grunt alone. He gave me a pained look.  
"What are you doing?"  
"Nothing." I held me chin up high. I had nothing to prove to any of these people. They knew who I was… they all feared me for it.  
I was the one who stopped there beloved king.  
N didn't ask again as we walked past the final door at the hall. I was surprised he didn't peek inside it like he did all the others, so I slowed to a stop and pointed to it.  
"I... don't think you want me to go in that room." N said, biting the inside of his cheek.  
"Why not?" I reached out with my hand and tried to grab the doorknob. N stopped me by tugging on the leash and pulling my wrist back around. "N…" I scowled at him.  
"I don't want you to be sad…"  
"Why?" I pulled back on the leash and reached for the door again. This time he caught me by the arm and forced me to look at him.  
"That's… that's were we prepare pokemon for release to the wild."  
My heart sank. Of course he didn't want me to see that. A terrible sinking feeling gathered in the pit of my stomach and weighed it down as if I swallowed a brick. My legs felt numb as I looked into N's pained eyes.  
"Are my pokemon in there?" I asked.  
He looked away, not wanting to answer me. It was answer enough.  
"You released them?" I choked out. "Didn't you?"  
"No!" he surprised me. "I didn't but no one else can know that." his eyes were hard again. "Your pokemon are being taken care of specially."  
The brick lifted, but left an aching. "By who?"  
"Anthea."  
My eyes must have looked like they were about to pop out of there sockets. I just shook my head, thankful to know they weren't returned to the wild at least…  
But I still wondered… why was N having Anthea take care of my pokemon instead of just letting them go?  
"I'm sorry… let's go." N said, tugging gently on the leash and leading me to the elevator, leaving the door alone.  
I sighed but fallowed. Even if I did somehow break out of this leash… grunts were everywhere, covering every door and elevator. I would never escape all of them.  
The elevator doors slid open to reveal two grunts wrapped up in each other, the girl gripping the bulge in the dude's pants and her face plastered to his. Tongue fought back and fourth and a terrible heat came over me.  
N cleared his throat.  
The two looked over at N in shock, there eyes flickering to the buttons in the elevator. Their expression was easy to read. Neither of them realized how fast floors could go by while groping on each other.  
"Lo—Lord N!" The girl squawked, buttoning the top button of her shirt and bowing in respect. The guy just stood in terror.  
"What are you two doing?" N didn't hold back. "This is the second time you have been caught together on duty!"  
I grabbed the sleeve of his shirt; suddenly afraid of the punishment he would give these two lovebirds.  
"My apologies my Lord." The guy spoke up, his face flushed and sweaty.  
"You must be punished." N insisted.  
"N." I whispered under my breath.  
"Yes Lord."  
"Now, now just wait a second." I shoved my hand against N's chest and stepped between him and the grunts. I looked up at him and his face loosened up a bit.  
"What?" he asked in confusion.  
"Why should you punish them for being in LOVE?" I emphasized, trying to get the wheels in his head turning. He remembered the night we talked about it; he shouldn't have jumped to punishment so fast.  
"But, Touko—  
"It's a pretty long elevator ride you know." I wagged my finger at him and put my other hand on my hip. "Maybe you should just… give them a warning?" I suggested.  
N looked at me like he was lost.  
I could feel the grunts eyes boring into my back. Their silent pleas were loud and clear.  
"Well… I guess." N was trying very hard not to look like he did around me, vulnerable. His shoulders were back and he looked past me shoulders at the two of them. "If I catch you doing that again…" he paused to harden his voice. "You can expect I will do far more than writing you up."  
The two grunts stayed a safe distance away from each other and nodded frantically. "Yes Lord, N." they said simultaneously  
"Now go finish your duties." He snorted and they stepped swiftly out of the way from the elevator doors. He punched in the long code much faster than Concordia had and I couldn't even begin to keep up.  
"Doesn't that feel better than punishing them?" I asked N as the doors shut, hiding their thankful eyes from my vision. There were two grunts that owed me a favor, I thought somewhat bitterly.  
They probably should have known better to begin with...  
"I think so." N nodded. "What if Ghetsis gets mad?"  
"Who are they going to tell?" I narrowed my eyes at him. "Trust me; I don't think anyone will find out about that."  
N nodded. "Your right… but it still bothers me."  
"What does?"  
"What they were doing… It makes me feel weird seeing them touch each other like that." his face may have turned a shade darker. I couldn't tell in the dim light.  
"That's what boyfriends and girlfriends do, N. I explained this to you."  
He shook his head. "But why does it make me feel all tingly inside?"  
It was my turn to blush. I ignored the tingling in my own stomach and swallowed. "Where does it tingle?" I asked, though I was sure the thought hadn't come out loud.  
"Below my belly button." He spoke in a low voice. "It happens a lot more lately…"  
I wanted to laugh and cry and maybe scream with embarrassment. I bit my lip and nodded. "Good to know." I muttered sarcastically. Well at least I know N has a dick. My own thoughts surprised me into closing my eyes and fighting back a nervous smile.  
Suddenly the elevator seemed too small and cramped for the amount of time it took to get to the top floors of the castle. I watched the numbers steadily.  
Twenty one… twenty four… twenty five.  
Some seemed to take longer than others, so I gave up and let myself look at N.  
"Do you tingle?" he asked.  
My heart skipped a beat. "No." I lied. I had felt that feeling plenty of times. Mildly once when looking at pictures of male models in a magazine with Bianca. There was also every time I ever looked at Tate… but he was just too much to ignore. I didn't consider it because regardless of who looked at him, they would fall under his spell. And then when things like that happened with the grunts. Who WASN'T affected by that in some way or another?  
"Is it just me?" N worried.  
Hurry up elevator! I yelled silently at the slowly lighting buttons. "No N, it happens to everyone."  
"Even pokemon?"  
How was I supposed to know the answer to that? "I don't know."  
"Has it ever happened to you?" he asked.  
Only at floor fifty-three…  
"Maybe…" I looked at my feet, my face growing hot.  
"Then it must happen to pokemon." He nodded.  
I groaned. "N, it's not exactly a polite topic to talk about ok? Not in public at least." I tried to change the subject. When would he realize that he and I were nothing but simple human beings?  
"Ok… will you tell me about it later?" he asked.  
I slapped my hand over my face and my shoulders sagged. "Maybe." If it wasn't for the fact that a boy his age should know exactly what that feeling was I wouldn't have been so willing. My mother had never given me "the talk" and I doubted she ever would. So this wasn't exactly easy. I didn't know were to start.  
"Ok." He said after a moment of contemplation. "Can I tell you something though?"  
"Sure. Why not?"  
"It happens around you a lot."  
My chest tightened and I didn't speak. N must have realized he said something wrong because he didn't try and bring it up at all, or pry for my reaction. He let it go for now.  
He's just a horny teenage boy… only he doesn't know what it means to be horny…  
I tried to tell myself it wasn't his fault that he felt this way around me, though I regretted wearing the dress now.  
The elevator doors finally opened and I stepped out quickly, trying to make the most of the space between me and N while I was leashed. It wasn't much, but I tried.  
We had only gone a few feet or so before a bellowing, howling noise sounded. I jumped nearly out of my skin and whirled around in shock. Red lights erupted from the ceiling and the familiar alarm was going off. All the water in the fountains stopped flowing; all the electricity was suddenly stopped.  
"PRISINOR ESCAPE! PRISINOR ESCAPE ON FLOOR NINTY EIGHT!" an intercom system roared frantically.  
I looked up at N, forgetting all about our conversation and turning white, rather than red. "But I'm right here!" I threw my arms up in surprise. "I didn't escape!"  
"Come on." N's voice was suddenly deadly. He dragged me along the hallway to the furthest end were a simple door lay among the rest of the glorious ones. "Hurry!" he threw open the wooden door and we began rushing down stairs.  
"You have to get back to your room." He said in a frantic voice.  
"What is going on!" I yelled, almost tripping over my own feet.  
"Just hurry!"  
And then suddenly the sound of thudding feet sounded with a gasping breath. I looked behind me, trying to find out were the noise had come from. Something crashed into me then, too fast for me to see who it was.  
"Touko!" N gasped as the leash around his arm was ripped off by the force of the person running. I fell, hit the small of my back right on the corner of a step and hissed with pain. I was yanked back up so fast though I couldn't think twice.  
I was being pulled up the stairs now. Did my watery eyes deceive me?  
"Cheren!" I wailed over the alarms.


	10. Chapter 10

"Where are we going!" I cried with delight as he grabbed me by the hand and we hurled up the staircase back to floor ninety-nine. Cheren threw the door at the top open and then closed again as quickly as he could.  
A split second—just enough time to lock N on the other side—went by before we heard a banging rampage from behind the door.  
"We're getting out of here!" Cheren declared with a lustful voice. Freedom shown in his eyes and his smile was bigger than I had ever seen it.  
"I knew you would come rescue me!" I yelled as he led me to the other end of the hallway to the next set of stairs. All the elevators had stopped working and Cheren locked the only door going up the stairs. We had time… but we could only go up.  
None of the grunts worked on the last two floors so our path was clear.  
"Rescue YOU?" Cheren snorted a laugh. "I'm rescuing myself!"  
And that's when I realized that he had been here the whole time… being held hostage just like I had. Anger flared in my chest. How dare they do that to my friends!  
Capturing me was one thing… I was a threat… but Cheren? That was just evil. We were almost to the end of the hallway when a huge door creaked open. I narrowly avoided it, but was caught unexpectedly by a pair of huge hands. I screamed in terror as Cheren's hand was torn from mine. He whirled, rage darkening his already dark eyes.  
"Let me GO!" I screamed as Ghetsis shook me with all his might. My head rattled and I tried my hardest to claw at his eyes.  
"STOP!" Cheren wailed as the other sages blocked his path and he was being herded back down the hallway.  
I heard a faint buzzing sound and Cheren screamed. His figure disappeared between the mass of cloaks and kingly attire. My heart sank and I started kicking and scratching and throwing myself around like no ones business.  
"YOU BASTARDLY GIRL!" Ghetsis roared and shook me harder. "YOU CAN NOT ESCAPE!"  
My heart felt like it was going to be shaken straight from my chest. "CHEREN!" I yelled as they yanked him to his feet and dragged his limp body. I couldn't see much more, and with his defeat I went limp and waited for Ghetsis to stop.  
"Ghetsis!"  
I was amazed… completely and utterly shocked by how quickly I felt safe. It was instant, exactly when my brain registered the fact that N had broken through the door, I was safe.  
"N…" I groaned as Ghetsis released all of me except for my arm. He gripped it too tightly, making my skin turn a ghostly white.  
Once N was close enough to us Ghetsis threw me into his arms.  
"TAKE HER BACK TO HER ROOM!" he snarled and raised his hand to hit N. I flinched at N's feeble attempt to get away. He hid my face in his chest and his fingers curled into my hair.  
"Look me in the eyes boy." Ghetsis demanded. I peeked out at him and his ring covered fingers were curled into tight fist. He clenched his jaw and pulled his arm back.  
"STOP!" I ripped away from N and bowled myself into Ghetsis with all my strength. His fist managed to skim N's shoulder but it wasn't nearly as bad as it could have been.  
"I will decapitate you." Ghetsis wrapped his fingers around my neck and squeezed. "Do NOT interfere!"  
I tried to swallow but it got stuck and I gasped for air.  
"Ghetsis!" N begged.  
His fingers grew tighter around my throat. For a split second I wondered if he COULD decapitate me. When you're in the moment like that… seeing stars from the lack of air, it seemed very possible.  
"FATHER!" N cried.  
And suddenly the hand let go. I gasped for air and fell to my knees, my throat throbbing with effort and my chest heaving.  
"I told you not to call me that." Ghetsis hissed. "Now get out of my sight while I punish your little pet."  
N stared horrified at his father for a long moment. I looked up at him with pleading and my arms trembled. Please… please, my eyes begged.  
"N—No." N finally whispered.  
He was raked across the face so hard it made blood spurt from his nose.  
Tears swelled in my eyes and I fought the dizziness away. I stood to my feet and stumbled into N. I threw my arms around him and clutched the back of his shirt, sobbing. Stand up for yourself! I wailed silently.  
"No!" N repeated, holding his cheek with a cupped hand.  
Silence fell over the room as the majority of the grunts stared at us in shock. The whole hallway of floor ninety-nine was flooded with a crowd of wide eyes. I understood there look of disbelief.  
They where shocked, not only because N's former rival was clinging to his shirt sobbing, feeling blood drip in her hair, but because their King's own father had hit him. No one raised a hand to the king without being executed.  
N stared around, fighting back tears in his own eyes. He took in a rasping breath and cleared his throat. His lips were red from his dripping nose before he raised an arm to wipe away the thick, salty smelling blood.  
He cast one devastating look at his father before speaking. "Back to work Grunts…" his voice was raw.  
"That girl is going to the guillotine!" Ghetsis demanded.  
N shot him a look of disbelief and tilted his chin up. Ghetsis was ignored as N pulled me along, his long fingers curled around my shoulders and not letting me go. I blinked, feeling refreshed now, and so proud of N it made new tears escape my eyes.  
The grunts made a path with no delay for N to walk through. He didn't look anyone in the eyes as he walked with me.  
I on the other hand… got every furious, bewildered, sorrow-filled, and pleading stare that they had to offer. Only a handful or so looked sorry for me. The elevators went on, the grunts dispersed, and Ghetsis slammed his huge room door. I wasn't sure how you could slam something so great, but he did.  
N didn't bother going into the elevator for one flight of stairs, so we walked silently down the dim corridor to the next magnificent hallway. This one was familiar and I realized the staircase had ended in a door that only opened into the small storage room that I never paid much attention to. I knew it was one of those doors you could only open with a code or a key by the way N stalled at it, his shaky fingers working over the lit up keys.  
My hallway was quiet and full of light, with no sign of the havoc that had gone on just above us. The huge window at the end showed the high daytime sun and few thin clouds. I sighed a shaky breath and came to a slow stop just before reaching my own huge door.  
N looked down at me with cloudy eyes. Dried blood was clinging to his face and smeared across his cheek, while fresh blood still dripped. I could see now that he had not only a bloody nose, but a neat slice in his right eyebrow. He sniffed up the blood as it threatened to pour.  
I grabbed his hand. "Come on. Let me show you what to do."  
None of us said a word as we entered my room, which felt slightly heavy and thick. It was almost humid, but N was too stressed to notice. My eyes flickered around, trying to catch a glimpse of Crypt, but knowing he was perfectly hidden somewhere, waiting for his turn to appear to me.  
He would be very worried and upset with what happened… judging by the way the room felt I knew he could already sense the trouble. I flinched; it was only a matter of time before N did notice something odd about my room's atmosphere…  
We climbed the spiral staircase to his floor quickly, my hand still in his, and the other clutching the railing. I felt kind of dizzy, but didn't let it bother me. N kept sniffing the blood back up and I knew that wasn't good. I used to get bloody noses often as a kid and my mother had always told me to lean over and just let the blood come out.  
I had never been in N's bathroom, but it was surprisingly normal, looking much like mine across the hall downstairs. Gold faucets and royal blue towels and marble floors. It was simple, but the smell of men's cologne filled the air.  
"Come here." I pulled him along to the sink. "Stop sniffing it back up, that will just make it get stuck in your sinuses. Lean over and let it come out on its own."  
He obeyed silently. It wasn't often he was so silent… so I was afraid that this time Ghetsis had really hurt him. My hand stroked his shoulder once or twice before I grabbed the smallest towel off the rack and rinsed it in warm water with the second sink.  
My fingers probed gently along his forehead and I could see he was really in pain. "Ghetsis didn't break your nose did he?" I whispered, applying very slight pressure to the cut in his eyebrow.  
N shook his head. "I don't think so." He sounded nasal, and coughed once. Blood spattered the counter and he groaned.  
I pushed his hair back behind his ear and looked at his troubled face. He glanced up at me and something more than sorrow passed through the emerald depths of his eyes. I felt my heart swell for him as I wiped his cheek clear of the dried blood. He blinked twice and then pinched the bridge of his nose.  
I figured asking him if he was ok wasn't exactly the right thing to do at a time like this, when it was obvious he wasn't ok, but I couldn't stop myself. I asked anyways.  
"Are you?" he replied weakly, rather than answering.  
I nodded and swallowed. This was a lie, but what was I going to say? My throat felt tight and my heart was thudding awkwardly. "I… I'm proud of you N." I rinsed out the small towel and left it on the sink next to me.  
"What?" he peeked up at me through his lashes again. The drippy-ness of the blood has stopped now and he was able to raise his head to look at me. He stayed over the sink just in case.  
"You stood up to Ghetsis."  
"He's going to hit me later… when the grunts aren't around." N's voice was barely more than a whisper. My heart was breaking for him.  
An eighteen year old with practically no life experience but was a king and had an abusive father than hated him. I wasn't sure how many times I had repeated that in my head. It just all seemed too impossible… something you only ever hear in the newspapers from regions and regions away. Unova had once been a sane place… I wasn't sure what happened to it now.  
Or was it just me?  
I pressed my forehead against N's arm and sighed. "Stand up to him… don't let him hit you." I said. "He can only do so much… those grunts fallow you, not him. I'm sure you could threaten him with that."  
N just shook his head, knowing he would never really do that. I felt helpless. What were you supposed to say to someone like that? Too powerful to ignore and too under his father's shadow to stand up for himself. This was impossible.  
"I'm sorry… Touko…" N said suddenly.  
"For what?"  
"I'm sorry… that Cheren is here."  
And now I was stuck. I pulled my face off his arm and looked away, trying to find it in me to be angry at him for keeping Cheren here as well as me. Cheren didn't deserve it… I didn't, but he especially was innocent. Cheren had only ever tried to stick up for me and never give up. That was his downfall in the end it seemed…  
But was that it? Was this really the end? I found it hard to believe so.  
"Are you very angry with me?" N asked, trying to look me in the eyes. He rubbed his sinuses gently and then touched the slice in his brow. He flinched.  
"I just don't think its fair…" the last thing I wanted to do was upset him any more than he already was. "Why are you keeping Cheren here? He was never a threat."  
"He would have had everyone who knows you try and get you out… He would have done anything to break you free and not even team Plasma can hide from eight gym leaders." N wouldn't stop staring into my soul. I was surprised to find that I wasn't mad about this. It was no longer N keeping me here because he was afraid of me beating him… he was keeping me here now because he needed me, regardless of what he said.  
I shook my head slowly. "This is so wrong…"  
He bowed his head. "I… I'm sorry…"  
How could I do this to him? Leave him and escape with Cheren just to beat him in the end and stop everything his life has ever been? How could I betray him like that? Of course it wasn't like I had a choice… but he was suddenly my friend and given the chance to run again, I wasn't sure I could do it.  
Could I face N in battle again one day? Could I set fire to the rain? And more importantly… could I ever think of him as the enemy again? I knew the answer to that and hated myself for being so stupid.  
My ribcages fluttered with butterfree as I realized I cared more about him than I ever should have. Friend or no friend… Mienshao or no Mienshao… he was still trying to liberate pokemon. It was wrong. So why did being with him feel so right?  
I touched his hand very softly and he looked up to meet my gaze. I didn't have anything to say at the moment so I just stared into his eyes.  
"Are we still friends?" N choked. "You are my only friend… I—I'm sorry I—  
I squeezed his hand and bent forward to put my face back into his bicep. He cut off mid sentence and I sighed. "We're friends."


	11. Chapter 11

I wasn't sure what either of us was thinking at the time, but we sure as hell didn't notice when sitting up talking in N's room turned into laying in bed whispering. My eyes were heavy and every time I brought up the desire to go downstairs and into bed, N distracted me, asking one more question that I just had to answer.  
So when I woke up in his bed with him I was about ready to scream with shock. His back was turned to me, but I was all curled up against it, his hair was curled between my fingertips as if I had been running my hands through it. I bit my lip when I realized I had caused this. Now I didn't even have to excuse of blaming him. I was the one who hadn't gone down stairs. I had fallen asleep in his bed with him… how embarrassing.  
The gentle rise and fall of his side proved he was still asleep, and I hesitantly twisted a lock of his tea green hair between my finger tips. I could have moved away from him, or gotten up and gone down stairs, but something held me there at his side. It was almost like I was enjoying myself.  
I had never noticed before how tight and toned his muscles were. He was in good shape despite the innocent atmosphere that made him seem like a child rather than eighteen. My fingers began to part a thicker lock of his hair until I was braiding the ends loosely. My heart felt full and my chest was light, much better than yesterday.  
Would he mind that I was curled up next to him? He must have noticed at some point in the night. I hadn't fallen asleep next to him after all. Last I remembered I had been at the foot of the bed on my stomach while he lounged lazily at my side. That's it… we hadn't even been lying correctly. So why were we all tucked under the blankets and why were our heads on the many fluffy pillows now?  
I didn't move once again, just sighed and breathed in the clean smell of the sheets. His hair was kind of straggly and wavy looking from sleeping on it all night, but I was sure mine didn't look any better. Gently I brought my hands up to my cheek and pushed my nose further into his shoulder blade, pinching the braid gently between my fingertips.  
I thought about Cheren while I was lying there… thinking about all the possible things they could have done to him… They wouldn't send him to the guillotine would they? I grew terribly afraid and pushed the thought away. No, they wouldn't kill him for nothing. Ghetsis had a big bark… not such a huge bite though.  
I tried to convince myself I believed this…  
And if Cheren was here, then what were the chances of escaping? He was the one I relied on most to break me out of here… and he had been stuck in this prison the whole time. Team plasma wasn't stupid… I hated to admit it, but they knew me and my friends too well.  
Poor Bianca was probably so lonely without us. Unless of course they had her here too… but I highly doubted it. Bianca alone was no threat. Not in the slightest.  
N stirred next to me suddenly. I released his hair and folded my hands together under my chin, just waiting, and my stomach flipping.  
There was a soft, pleasant moan from him and I could tell he was just barely coming out of his slumber. He rolled over onto his back and his face fell into the crook between my neck and my cheek. I shivered and fought a whimper rising in my throat.  
He made a confused noise once again, probably irritating the cut in his forehead or something, but either way his eyes cracked open for a split second then closed again. He sighed.  
"Good morning." He whispered with a very faint laugh. His lips turned up at the corners. "You fell asleep in my bed."  
"I noticed." I squirmed slightly.  
His emerald eyes opened once again and the smile twisted in confusion. His cheeks were turning red. "You look different in the morning." He mused.  
I looked propped myself up on my elbow and looked down across the length of my body. I didn't seem any different, though I was still wearing the same dress from yesterday. It was all caught up around my hips and I flushed and pulled it down quickly.  
"Why do you say that?" I looked at him. He looked back at me and blinked.  
"You look more like a pokemon."  
I rolled my eyes. "I'm not a pokemon."  
He shook his head like I was the crazy one then pulled his arms up under his chin to be laying on them. I noticed a faint bruise appearing along the length of his cheek and over his nose.  
"How is your nose?" I asked looking over at him. My hand caught the lock of hair I had been braiding and I pulled it up to twist more into place.  
He watched me for a long moment, perhaps not hearing my question. The bliss in the air seemed to fade after some amount of time, until N just took a deep breath and let himself relax. I got the impression he had one of those nights were you wake up feeling worse than you did going to sleep. My heart went out to him.  
"What are you doing there?" N whispered, eyeing my quick fingers.  
I stopped and blushed slightly. I ran my fingers through the brain and smoothed it out. "I was braiding your hair… sorry." I hadn't considered him not wanting me to touch him.  
He leaned over to his side and stared at me with gentle eyes. "I'm afraid, Touko." There was no denying the plea in his voice. "Ghetsis will hit me… and punish me…"  
I shook my head. "No…"  
"Yes." N seemed to have found a weak spot in my defenses. He was staring right through me now. In attempts to look away I pressed my face into his shoulder.  
Oh how I wished I could tell N that I would protect him… I wanted to say I wouldn't let Ghetsis hurt him, not ever… but it would have been an empty promise. Ghetsis just had it out for N… his own son.  
"Don't go anywhere that wont be filled with grunts." I suggested, remembering the way everyone had stared in horror at Ghetsis yesterday. He wouldn't harm the beloved Lord N in the presence of all his followers. He wasn't that stupid.  
"But I have to bring Ghetsis and the other sages paperwork today… and I have a meeting with a company that makes pokemon clothing and Ghetsis wont want the grunts—  
"What about Concordia and Anthea?" I asked. "They care about you like you are there little brother… cant you have them with you? Ghetsis won't hurt you around anyone else…" I hoped I was right.  
"Who will watch over you?" he mused.  
"Really N, I know how to handle myself." I gave him a cross look. "You know I was on my own for almost a year before… well you know. All this happened." I had to admit it; I was sick and tired of being "taken care of", which was code for being watched like a braivary.  
N didn't look very convinced. "I don't know how you did it."  
"Easy. I had my pokemon with me." for the first time in what felt like a long time I just wanted to find them and get out of here. Scrafty, Unfezant, Reuniclus, Samorott, and Eelektross…  
N felt the sudden despair between us and looked away, taking it the wrong way. Or maybe he was just guilty. He sighed again.  
"You know… your pokemon are more stubborn than you are." N finally said. "They don't do anything they are told even though they are treated better than any other pokemon here…"  
I felt a humorless laugh rise in my chest. That would be just like them… to misbehave and do everything they could just to drive everyone crazy. I couldn't quite smile though. This was confirmation for me. "I want to see them." I said.  
"I can't let you…" N looked up again. "I will get punished."  
I rolled my eyes. "But you say you are going to get punished from what you did yesterday… so either way you are getting punished right? What else could happen? What is the worst that the sages or Ghetsis could do to you?" I didn't realize how selfish I sounded until his hand crept up to his face and he probed the darkening bruise.  
I sighed. I didn't want N to get beat because of me…  
"Maybe…" He said when I least expected it. "If I can go back onto the top floor today and get them…"  
My heart skipped a beat and I felt a sudden swell of happiness. I would get to see my pokemon!  
"N… you don't know how much that would mean to me." I grabbed his hand and squeezed it lightly.  
He looked at me again now and a very soft smile lit his eyes. "How come you make me feel like this, Touko?"  
"Like what?"  
"Like I can get in trouble and be punished… And it won't matter because I just want to make you happy."  
"We're friends." I wasn't sure what the strange, tugging feeling was between us but it was starting to really gnaw on my heart strings. He was just so… so sweet.  
"I wouldn't do that for my pokemon friends though."  
"Some friends are more special than others." I wasn't about to explain to him how special Bianca was to me, or how special Cheren was when he was being pleasant. And I certainly wasn't going to tell him how much Mienshao had meant to me… I would have done anything for her.  
N smiled that same gently smile. It was the opposite of Tate's smile, which was always so twisted and mysterious. N was open and innocent. He had nothing to hide. I smiled back at him, wondering if even a month ago this was possible. Rivals being friends… different ideals, completely different people for sure.  
Water and fire.  
"You are my very special friend." N said, reaching forward and pushing a lock of hair out of my face. "No one else has ever made me feel like this."  
I breathed in the pleasant smell of the sheets, mixed with the musky, boyish smell of N lying next to me. "Isn't it weird though?"  
His eyebrows came down, as if to fight off any reason for this friendship to be weird.  
"Fire and water." I laughed. "If we are pokemon like you said we are… then shouldn't we dislike each other?"  
He may not know much about human emotions or how they work, but when it came to pokemon he knew exactly what he was talking about. He smiled a now wider smile at me, showing the perfect alignment of his white teeth. I had never noticed before, he had a very slight gap between his top front teeth. It was adorable.  
"Pokemon tend to adapt when they are out of their environment. When there is a type that is weaker than another they have to adapt to live in harmony with it." N explained.  
I shook my head. "Oh, ok." The sarcasm in my voice was light and teasing. He blushed slightly.  
"Or maybe I'm not a water type." He suggested. "Maybe I'm a electric type, or a grass type, or maybe even an ice type."  
I rolled my eyes, thinking of how Tate was the ice type. N wasn't even close. He was warmer, softer than that. Water… but water could be violent. Grass? Now there was a possibility.  
"N, trust me. You are NOT an ice type." He smiled sheepishly anyways.  
"I know."


	12. Chapter 12

I spent most of the day alone, waiting for either N to get back—hopefully with my pokemon—or for Tate to show up. Crypt was somewhat depressed, and I got the idea he wanted to do something other than just stay cooped up on a room all day every day. So I took him with me to the shower and let him play around in the water for some time while I just sat on the counter blow drying my hair, which I never took the time to do here.  
Crypt was a pretty great pokemon. He was mellow enough to be content in a boring place like this, but out going enough that I knew he would like battling… if he ever got the chance. I hoped I would actually get to train him one day… Or at the very least I hoped Tate would take the time to train him. He was kinda both our pokemon anyways.  
Speaking of Tate he never showed up. I was afraid that my lack of seeing him yesterday really did piss him off and now he didn't want to see me. But when you have nothing else to do but worry, of course you assume the worst. I sat on the royal blue sofa staring out the huge window with Crypt at my side.  
I sighed. "It's so nice outside Crypt."  
The look on his face told me he thought otherwise. Ghost types apparently didn't like sunlight, I knew this because he never stood directly in it if it could be avoided. But I did… and staring out the window was making me feel claustrophobic despite the size of this place.  
When was the last time I had felt he sun on my skin? It looked good and hot outside, the kind of weather that used to coax me out of the house for hours on end when I was little. It was during the hot season that my Mienshao had evolved in. Come to think of it, all of my pokemon seemed to grow in some way or another during the summer.  
I really hoped N would get my pokemon and let me see them…  
Crypt nuzzled my side with his misty body and made a comforting noise, not quite as throaty as a purr, not as high pitched as a squeal.  
"You're a good boy Crypt." I ran my hand through him. "And you know… you don't have to stay on this floor all the time… only I have to."  
He looked up at my in surprise; being an intelligent pokemon I knew he understood human speech fluently.  
"I trust that you won't get caught… so if you ever wanted to go explore the castle more… you could. Just as long as you don't cause trouble or find any pokemon that would pass on the word to N of you being here."  
Crypt nodded with excitement and I knew he was going now. He must have wanted to leave at some point.  
"Be back tonight…" I whispered as he wafted away from me and disappeared into some invisible force. The air always tightened when he did that. And now I was alone…  
I sat for a long time, trying to decide what to do with myself. Part of me wanted to go up into N's room and snoop around his stuff, but that might get me in trouble. Instead I stood and headed for the huge door.  
I had forgiven N quite some time ago for what happened to Mienshao, but I had never given his Zoroark the same kindness. Maybe Zoroark was in the play room now.  
I walked down the quiet hall quickly and stopped at the smaller, childish wooden door. It was cracked open already, so I just went in without stopping to think about it.  
Zoroark was curled up sleeping next to a large fan that was blowing his dark fur in ripples. He must be hot from the heat and having all that fur, I assumed. I had put on a pair of daisy dukes—the only pair I had because I requested them—and a white tank top. It made me think of the outfit I wore the day I set out on my journey. The only difference was the black vest I had worn. Without it I felt a little white trash, but I didn't care enough to let it bother me.  
I looked up past Zoroark's sleeping form and saw just past the mass of stuffed pokemon and toys was a cleared area. The rug was plush and there was a treadmill in the middle of it. I glanced to my left and could see some other basic work out things aligned neatly.  
So N really had put in a gym? I wanted to laugh, but was too excited. The only problem was that I didn't want to work out in a stuffy room like this.  
Zoroark stirred beside me when I shut the door, everything seemed to grow heavier without the air going through. He looked up, dazed and blinked at me once before seeing who it was.  
Suddenly he was on his feet, looking at me with a half surprised and half unsure expression. The guilt I had seen in his eyes last time was gone and I hoped he wasn't angry with me for not forgiving him sooner… surely my resistance was understandable.  
"Hi Zoroark." I said after taking a deep breath. My hand stretched forward, an open gesture for him to approach me.  
He did as I expected and came slowly, but put his long snout under my fingertips. I ran them back over his head as I spoke. "I know you wanted me to forgive you, Zoroark… I wasn't strong enough to do that before."  
He looked up at me with his dark purple eyes and waited, his expression was hopeful.  
"But I am now… I forgive you for what happened with Mienshao." Her name still felt raw on my tongue.  
Suddenly Zoroark wasn't hunched over, he was standing tall on his legs; I never realized that he was so tall before. My hand slipped off the top of his head as he rose. Gently he set his jaw over my shoulder and pressed his cheek against the side of my head.  
A hug.  
I ran my fingers down his broad back and felt heat seeping through all that fur. Despite the moment, I wasn't afraid to ruin it. "You need a haircut or something." I said, making him pull away.  
He smirked at me in a very human way and suddenly transformed. I watched in surprise as his body reshaped itself into something terribly familiar. I stared in shock at N/Zoroark standing in front of me. He didn't speak, but other than the silence everything was a perfect match.  
He flashed his teeth with a smile and I corrected myself. Not everything was perfect. That tiny gap was missing; the one flaw on a perfect king had been corrected by this master illusionist.  
I rolled my eyes as Zoroark stepped forward again and hugged me. His body was still burning up, but felt very human like. Everything down to his fingertips was able to move like a human, making me wonder how pokemon could really be that different than us.  
Zoroark transformed back to himself after a second and then stepped away and headed back tours the large fan.  
"Why do you stay cooped up in this room if it's hot in here?" I asked. Surely he would be able to leave if he wanted. I made my way over to the treadmill as I asked.  
Zoroark shrugged and made a rumbling noise. He watched as I examined the treadmill. Sure enough it had small wheels on one side of it. I smiled and bent down to pop them out.  
"Help me move this Zoroark." I asked, tilting down the heavier end so the wheels balanced without being held in place by the stop. I almost dropped the thing but steadied it with some extra effort. I huffed out a quick breath and turned it.  
Zoroark looked at me in confusion as I started rolling the machine tours the wooden door that would lead me into the hall.  
"I'm not working out in this room. There's no air in here." I explained as he came over and put his claws on the other end and supported it. Almost all the weight on my side vanished instantly. What a strong pokemon.  
Together we rolled the treadmill down the hall, getting disapproval glanced from few grunts, but no one said anything. Zoroark lifted the machine all alone while I opened the huge door wide. He brought it in as easily as if he was lifting the basket of clothes on my floor.  
I hoped Crypt wouldn't come back anytime soon, since Zoroark already looked more comfortable in my cool room. He made no attempt to leave after we got the treadmill set up near the window. Hopefully Tate wouldn't pop up while he was here either…  
The sun was high in the cloudless blue sea out the window. The forest below looked lush and thriving, and the ever-going distance looked to be swathed in buttery sunshine. I searched the nearest wall for a plug and found it just in reach, lucky for me.  
I pulled my hair back in a tight pony tail and put on the pair of tennis shoes I had before stepping onto the machine. Some music would have been nice, but I wasn't about to complain. Being able to work out was more than I could ask for. I needed to be able to work off all this extra energy from just lounging around all day.  
I pressed the button.


	13. Chapter 13

I woke up from a dull light casting in from the stain glass windows above the giant door. It wasn't as frightening this morning when I woke up, because I knew where I was and expected the splendor and glory of the room before I opened my eyes. But what I didn't expect was the gorgeous model boy laying in my bed with me, his arms behind his head and his jaw moving steadily as he chomped on a piece of gum.  
I was about to scream, finding a boy in my bed, but he covered my lips with a finger.  
"So help me god I will—  
"Calm down. I just got here." he assured with a smirk. "I'm not a pervert or anything." He winked at me.  
I flushed a dark crimson and wondered if I was going crazy or not. Was last night all just a dream? Had all that alarm going off madness really happened? Had me and N had some sort of breakthrough or not? It was hard to believe it.  
But his perfect face was just too hard to ignore. Too real…  
It was round still, showing the lingering teenager in his eyes. He had round eyes with slight lips and heavy set eyebrows. His body was lean and toned, his dark gray sweatshirt showed no mercy hiding it either.  
"Who the hell are you?" I clutched my hands into fists.  
"I'm still shocked you don't know." He twirled a piece of his white hair and chewed his gum loudly. The smell of mint was only too appropriate for his wintry appearance.  
"Well you won't tell me!"  
"I'm part of the Shadow triad." He snorted. "You probably don't recognize me without all my fancy gear and what not."  
I realized now that this was exactly who I had been trying to think of when I noticed he was familiar before. The Shadow triad… workers that had always seemed to be focused on bringing me to N and nothing else. I had never taken the time to notice them before, considering when they came around I knew I would be seeing N soon. On my journey I was too nervous to pay attention to them anyways.  
Yet here he was, young and sexy and sprawling all over my bed just chewing his gum.  
"Why are you here?" I challenged. "What about the other two?"  
He sat up next to me and blew a quick bubble that popped loudly. He drew it back into his mouth before speaking. "You see… the Shadow triad… we are sworn into serving the highest in command."  
"That's N." I assumed. "The king."  
"Well it was." the boy silenced me with another pop of his bubble. "But you see, part of the deal is if the king fails or is beaten in battle, we have to serve his successor."  
I blinked in astonishment.  
"That's you, incase you were wondering." His crooked smile made me look away.  
"What about the other two?" I repeated, feeling like they would pop up out of no where and scare me.  
"They left." He shook his head. "They didn't believe N could be beaten so they fled the region. Who wants to serve a boring girl like you right?" he teased.  
I just blinked, wondering what to think of that.  
"Does team Plasma know? Does N…?"  
He shook his head looking like it didn't bother him much. "Nah, they think we all left and, quite frankly, no one can catch me from teleporting out of their reach."  
I wasn't sure whether I was intrigued with that inhumanly beautiful smile or frustrated with the way it made me feel.  
"So you came here… to serve me?" I said, just to be sure.  
"Yep."  
"Then you can get my pokemon back for me and get me out?" I realized just the opportunity this could be for me. This was exactly what I needed!  
He laughed. "Not on your life."  
"What? I thought you had to serve me!"  
"Well there are two things wrong with that idea… you see, I cant teleport where I haven't been. And team plasma has a tracking device on me and the others so if they happen to get any ideas they will hunt me down. I'm not saying I couldn't take them…" he shrugged. "But it's not worth it."  
"If you won't help me then why are you here?"  
"To serve you."  
"Then serve me by getting me out of here!"  
"You're cute when you're angry, you know that?"  
I was fuming, my face hot with anger. How dare he! "You have the ability to teleport me out of here in a heartbeat yet you won't? Even though you are SERVING me?"  
"That's right." He folded his arms behind his head again and flopped back down, his head landing on my pillows and chewing his gum as simply as if we had never had the conversation.  
"What do you plan on doing then? To serve me?"  
He opened his eyes and looked up at me with his striking silver eyes. "I figure you would need a friend to keep you busy around here."  
"Why can't we just leave?" I moaned.  
"You would go without your team?" He challenged.  
I grasped the blankets in frustration. "No…"  
"Exactly."  
"But you could get me out of here for now and then I can get help… my friends Cheren and Bianca will help me think of a way to get them out."  
"A book worm and an asthma attack waiting to happen, yeah that will help."  
I glared at him. "Don't talk about my friends like that!"  
"I'm just keeping it real."  
"Well I don't appreciate it."  
He laughed. "I gotta go."  
"Wait… what?"  
"Bye." He winked once more before flickering out of sight. I stared in wonder at the spot he had just been laying in. I squirmed, balling my fists up and stretching them as if I had arthritis. I was just so angry.  
I didn't even know his name and he already drove me crazy.  
"Is someone down there?" N's voice interrupted my fuming and he was waltzing down the spiral staircase. I controlled myself quickly and put on a normal face. He looked around cautiously and saw me sitting awkwardly on the bed, still in the clothes from yesterday. I remembered that I wasn't wearing a bra and was happy I had the sweatshirt for cover up. I hadn't felt self conscious yesterday because I had been too busy thinking about everything else.  
I was now though.  
"No." I shook my head, trying to play dumb. "Why?  
I noticed N was wearing a collared shirt and khaki pants today, they looked pressed and smooth. Professional. His long hair was hanging down freely, showing off great length and a luxurious look to it. His eyes seemed a little brighter today and the red had faded from his cheeks. He still had a yellowing bruise on one of his cheek bones and I realized that it wasn't Ghetsis slapping that did that, a slap wasn't solid enough to make a bruise.  
"I thought I heard something." he said, walking over to the edge of my bed. "It worried me."  
"Hey N… I… did I…?"  
He looked at me like I was speaking another language.  
"Did I do that?" I pointed to the bruise on his face. I had punched him with all my strength that night. I actually might have been insulted if it didn't leave a bruise. I was still guilty though. Who was to say I was any better than Ghetsis?  
I felt my heart lurch and pushed the feeling down. No way. Ghetsis was a monster that hit his own son for no reason. I had hit his son for a very good reason. There was a difference.  
"Yeah… But it's ok."  
"No its not… I'm sorry." I looked him in the eyes. My mother always told me to look people in the eyes when you apologize because it would be more personal. She said it would help them understand that you had made a mistake.  
He nodded at me. "It really is ok."  
"I was just… freaking out. I wasn't thinking and I was… just so upset I couldn't control myself."  
"Touko, its ok. I forgive you. You are supposed to forgive people when they apologize and mean It." he repeated the words I had spoken to him when I first woke up here.  
Did I mean it? Did I really regret punching him that night? With everything I had seen here since I woke up the next day… I really honestly did. N had enough abuse in his life.  
"But… do you forgive me?" He asked.  
I wondered if I did. Was it really his fault my Mienshao had died? I knew the answer was yes in a sense… but that was just because I had been battling him. Because he was the king I had to fight over ideals with. Had that king been Ghetsis, it would have been his fault. Ghetisis was the root of this all anyways. N and all his beliefs and the way he looked at pokemon and especially pokemon trainers. It was all spoon fed to him since the day he was born.  
For gods sake N didn't even think he was a human!  
So how could I leave him un-forgiven?  
I looked up into his eyes and saw that they were losing hope. He pouted and looked down. "I'm sorry… and I really honestly do mean it."  
"Why are you doing this, N?" I asked him. "Why do you want me to forgive you so badly? I don't think I get it… I mean, we are enemies. We have completely different ideals and I don't think we live in the same world at all. You believe in what you believe in, and I believe in what I believe in. So why are we trying to apologize when at some point this will all just happen over again?"  
He was stunned by my speech, unsure of what to say.  
"So you see, N?" my voice grew quiet. "Why would I forgive you when things aren't going to get better? When this will all end in tragedy? When you apologize you have to mean it and learn from the mistake you made. We made a mistake when we battled; neither of us was strong enough to win. It was practically a tie, and the only way one of us is ever going to get what we want is if we fight for it. Right?"  
He nodded. "I… I guess your right."  
I felt absolutely terrible. All he wanted was three little words.  
I. Forgive. You.  
And here I was ruining the one chance I had of making his life even slightly better for him. Sure he was king and got practically everything he wanted in the exact second he wanted it… but he hadn't the love or the heart he needed to be… human.  
"I have to go check up on my workers…" N whispered after a long moment.  
I stared at him wishing I was a stronger person. If Mienshao was here she would be prodding me gently, encouraging me to let go of all the pain. She wouldn't want me to dwell on losing her. She would want nothing to ever get me down, she never did.  
She was the most loyal pokemon I had ever had and she was gone.  
How many times would those words invalidate my mind? How many times would I sit here wondering who was to blame for her death? Was it me for being too strong willed? Was it N and his Zoroark? Was it Ghetsis for creating this monster? Or was it Mienshao herself, for having too much courage.  
Nothing seemed to fit and I felt lonely as ever.  
N left without another word, pushing the huge door open with ease and going out into the hall. I didn't hear much noise so I decided to go investigate. Anything to keep me busy, but I waited a few minutes first. I wanted to make sure N was out of the hall way, even though that was still part of my floor, and I was secretly wondering if that shadow triad boy would come back.  
I had to convince him to help me. If he was so devoted to serving me then he would have to agree eventually. My hopes weren't high, he seemed like he wanted to annoy me more than serve.  
I felt dirty in the same clothes I had worn yesterday, so I figured a hot shower would work, even if I would be tempted to open that window again. I dreaded the thought of alarms going off again. How could something as big as team plasma be worried about one teenage girl?  
But then again… I was sort of the root of their destruction. I caused the fall through, I had the connections to Alder and all the gym leaders. Plus Cheren and Bianca. Though they weren't the best trainers in the world they sure were strong ones. Any association would be frightened of that right?  
The hall was empty when I went out of the room, except for one young lady that startled me. She had strange golden hair and her features were petite.  
"Oh!" she jumped back. "Sorry Miss Touko." She apologized for my fright but she looked to have experienced the worst of it.  
I gave her a strange look. Miss?  
"Do you need clothes Miss Touko?" I hadn't noticed that she had a full laundry basket at her side. "Lord N asked me to bring you them."  
"Oh… um yeah thanks." I nodded. "Are you part of team plasma?" she wasn't dressed like them.  
"Oh yes." She smiled a sweet smile and looked proud. "I'm one of the goddesses. My name is Concordia."  
"Oh. Ok." I said as she picked up the basket and handed it to me. I scanned it quickly and realized that I was missing bras once again. I figured if I had to ask anyone it should be Concordia. She seemed friendly enough.  
"N doesn't really know what a girl needs does he?" I mumbled before she had the chance to say something else or leave.  
"Oh no… I don't think he really even knows the difference between a girl and a boy. Anthea and I never taught him about that kind of stuff."  
Even pokemon knew the difference between male and female, I thought with disbelief.  
"Do you think I could get a couple bras?" I asked her before I could get side tracked. I hated not wearing a bra during the day.  
"Why yes." She bowed to me and then turned to leave.  
I watched her go before turning and going back into my huge room. I set the basket down and dug through it, finding a lot of the same things. Jeans, t-shirts, socks—I was happy about that—and underwear. Everything was my size, but nothing I would have ever bought myself.  
Simple grays… some blue and white, but not much. The best thing I found was a pair of black sweats I could lounge around in and a hair and tooth brush. I sighed with relief and grabbed them out of the basket. I was about to leave the rest of the clothes alone when I saw something black folded neatly at the bottom of it.  
A dress?  
I pulled it out and examined it, wondering why I would ever need this. It was knee length, tight, and had some electric blue beading. It wasn't exactly the kind of dress I would like, but I surprised myself with how much I did. I wasn't the dress wearing girl, not unless I had a very good reason to wear one, but this was just too luxurious not to notice.  
I couldn't picture myself in it. A dress like that made a girl like me look like white trash. I almost laughed before turning to leave the room.  
The shower was easier to manage today. I didn't make the stupid mistake of getting in before I turned the water on, so I wasn't adjusting things with my feet. The water was hot, almost burning me and filling the large marble room with steam. I couldn't see much more than three feet away from me, it was that bad.  
The shampoo on the ledge in the shower smelt like apples and cinnamon, but the conditioner might as well have been lard. It was so thick I almost decided not to use it. There wasn't an innocent smell to make it more convincing either, but the thought of running a brush through my knotted hair won the argument in my head.  
I lathered and rinsed three or four times before I was sure I was clean, free of all the rich filth of this castle. I wanted to feel like myself again. I was so convinced I could in that steamy room I thought that maybe when I got out I would be home, walking out into the long skinny hallway that overlooked the living room below. I wondered if my mother knew where I was…  
Was Cheren thinking of a way to get me out right now?  
I turned the hot water off, suddenly feeling cold and stepping out. The steam flitted around and made me shudder. I wiped my hand across the huge mirror to look at my flushed self. My hair looked like a hay stack when I dried it with the towel and I got to work with the new brush.  
Things were just as bad, if not worse, than they looked. It took me about ten minutes to get through all the snarls and I was tearing up at the way the pulling made me have to sneeze. The bristles were full of my hair when I was done. I pulled it out and tossed it into the waste basket by the toilet.  
I dried the rest of me quickly and brushed me teeth before wrapping the thick towel around myself before walking out into the hall. I was expecting a quick quiet walk back to my room, but to my embarrassment plasma grunts were busy once again. I bit my lip, wondering how long they would be running back and fourth on this floor.  
I decided reluctantly, when I realized that everyone was already casting me nervous glances, I would just go now. No one would have enough time to really notice me…  
Right?  
The huge door was much more of a hassle to open when you are clutching a towel around yourself. It took the unasked for help of a grunt to open it for me. I turned to say thank you but they already left. I scowled, everyone seemed pretty willing to help me, yet they were still rude.  
To my relief my room was empty and quiet. The door must be so big and heavy to keep out the noise, because I could hardly hear anything as soon as it shut. I walked swiftly to the clothes basket and grabbed the things I had left on top. Jeans and the only tank top that was probably meant for underneath the only button up shirt.  
There was a small plastic bag sitting on the edge of my bed with the bras I requested in it. Again, simple and bland. At least this wasn't a fashion statement. I clipped it around myself quickly and started to get dressed.  
Feeling refreshed and motivated I got up and went back out into the hall. I looked so different in my normal clothes compared to everyone else, and the stares I got this time didn't make me self conscious. It was almost like these people were envying me.  
I hadn't looked into the other doors besides the bathroom and the dank storage closet, though two more lay at the end of the hall. The first one had plasma grunts running in and out of like lightening, so I stayed clear of it.  
The other one was smaller and wooden, like my bedroom door back home. It had a simple doorknob with simple square shapes in it. I reached for the handle and opened it. It was exactly what I was expecting. The play room.  
Something in me felt strange, staring at all the stuffed pokemon and huge building blocks and the basketball hoop against the far corner. It was like I couldn't take any of this seriously, but at the same time it made everything even more vital. I looked around the stripped walls and the cloud covered floor and the toys, wondering what exactly it was all doing here. Did every floor have a room like this?  
Then I understood. This wasn't a room for any human, this was a pokemon room. I only figured it out when N's Zoroark came snuffling out from behind the skateboard ramp. I stiffened; hate filling my veins like fire.  
It didn't notice me at first, just buried itself into a pile of stuffed pokemon and made a happy groaning noise. I could hardly believe I was staring at the same pokemon that murdered Mienshao. I bit my lip and just watched it rolled around in bliss before it finally noticed me.  
It shot up, his face shocked. He closed his jaw tight and got to his two hind legs. He crouched over and just stared at me. Then, as if to be funny, it transformed.  
I was suddenly staring at myself. I grit my teeth together and balled my fists up. He saw the frustration and fell quickly back into his normal shape, his eyes sorry. He walked over cautiously, his head hung low with regret and I knew this wasn't just because of its nature of transforming. I grew more rigid as it approached me.  
God forbid I do anything to this pokemon… he meant the world to N and with no one around I could have thought of something to make N feel the pain I felt over losing Mienshao. I knew I would never hurt a pokemon, I wasn't that cruel, but my motives didn't falter.  
"Zoroark… you know you… you killed Mienshao."  
He snorted and shook his head, covering his ears and looked away like it hurt. He stared at the ground and inched closer to me. I waited until his eyes met mine once more.  
"You were already winning that battle… yet you still attacked her and killed her."  
He shook his head with dramatic movements. "Zoooarrr!"  
"What do you mean no?" I hissed.  
He pushed his head into my fist and tried to get it to loosen. He made strange begging noises and his soft fur tickled me. I waited once more, realizing that he was sorry. Truly, purely, agonizingly sorry in the way that only a pokemon could be. My heart of stone melted and it was just too much to bear.  
I pulled my tight hand away from him and turned to leave. He tried to fallow me but seeing that I left the room and slammed the door he couldn't. There was a faint cry as I stormed down the hallway once more. What was I supposed to do?  
Forgive him?  
Just like that…  
I couldn't.

…..

"Touko?"  
I was under the bed again.  
"Come on Touko I know you are in here somewhere…"  
Gorgeous lay at my side snickering.  
"Please tell me why Zoroark is so upset with you, he wont tell me!" N pleaded.  
I sighed softly and looked over at those silver eyes. "What do you want?" I whispered when N's feet were further away.  
"Not much." He shrugged, army crawling closer to the end of the bed and looking out further. "Why is the royal baby freaking out?" he asked me. "What did you do?" I didn't miss the flash of approval in his devious eyes.  
"I didn't do anything!" I hissed. "And… what are you doing—I mean… why are you— ugh!" he just had to be so perfect didn't he?  
"Yes?" his eyelashes fluttered at my disoriented-ness.  
"What is your name?" I blinked.  
"Trouble."  
I glared.  
He laughed quietly. "Alright, my name is Tate. Happy?"  
"Tate?" I raised an eyebrow,  
"You hang out with people that have a letter for a name and you're worried about Tate being weird?" he asked skeptically.  
I hated to admit it, but the name Tate was just as sexy as he was. It was so simple yet so… almost mysterious. Even so, it bothered me what he said.  
"I don't hang out with N."  
"Oh, right. I forgot you just sing to him."  
I turned cherry red. "I thought you were here to serve me? Not spy on me!" it was hard to control my voice and kept it low.  
He shrugged. "You are right. Let me help you out."  
I was about to ask him how when he suddenly spoke so fast it startled me.  
"Under here!" he squeaked in the best impression of my voice he could muster. I tried to grab him, thrust my hand in front of his mouth or punch him or something to make him stop. But as soon as I moved he vanished.  
I groaned. "Tate!" a little too loudly.  
"Touko?" N's voice became confused.  
I started squirming out from under the bed, wishing I wasn't such a chicken to have been hiding anyways. I didn't want to see anyone; I didn't want to have to look at this too big, too beautiful prison that was my room. I felt safe under the bed.  
He spotted me and came over quickly, looking at me in confusion. "What happened? Why were you under the bed?"  
I pulled myself up to sit and folded my arms. "I don't know."  
"Did you get lost?"  
"Lost under the bed?" I suddenly laughed. "It's not like the gateway to Narnia is down there or anything."  
"What…?"  
"Nevermind."  
"Touko, Zoroark is very upset and he won't tell me why but I know it has something to do with you." N suddenly became offensive. His eyebrows came together and I mimicked the action.  
"I didn't do anything to your Zoroark!" I defended myself.  
"Yes you did. Pokemon don't lie and he said it had something to do with you and he is upset so you must have done something."  
I stared at him in disbelief. "Are you kidding me N? Just because it has something to do with me doesn't mean I did something wrong."  
"But he is ups—  
"Because I wont forgive him for killing my Mienshao!" I cut him off. "He is guilty but I'm not ready to let this go. So I didn't forgive him."  
"But why not?" N's jaw was tight. "You're hurting him!"  
I stood up and faced N, my shoulders back. He may have flinched or may not have, I didn't notice, instead I jabbed a finger at him.  
"Now you listen to me ok? What would you do if your Zoroark died in battle? What if this situation was the opposite? Would you forgive my pokemon for being so ruthless?"  
N looked flustered and traumatized. Never before was he forced to think of the possibility of his pokemon dying. I could see it in his eyes. He didn't understand. He didn't get the pain because he couldn't make a choice.  
"I… I love all pokemon the same… if I was hurting one by not forgiving it I—I would…"  
"You wouldn't forgive my pokemon if it killed Zoroark and you know it!" I whirled away from him and stormed tours the door, not sure where I was going, but going somewhere other than here for sure.  
"Why Zoroark?" he called after me. "I would forgive it if it was any other pokemon. Pick a different one!"  
I stopped, my hand lingering on the door. "You are so human N. you think you treat all pokemon equally, but you know you love Zoroark more than anyone else."  
"That's not true!" his face turned a shade of red. "I'm a pokemon! I'm not a human!"  
I pushed the huge door open and left, ignoring him. I wondered when that boy would ever grow up. He was so stubborn.  
"I'm a pokemon!" I heard him call before the hefty door swung shut.  
I walked through a small crowd of grunts all staring in surprise, having heard N's plea. Some eyes were amused, some angry, and some sad. I spotted Concordia at the far end of the hallway, her eyes full of despair. She looked sympathetically at me as I walked to the bathroom door and went inside. I locked it.  
"You really shouldn't do that to the poor guy." Tate's voice came. He was sitting on the bathroom counter.  
"Why did you do that to me!"  
"You would have had to face him eventually. I was doing you a favor." He said cheerily.  
"I should punch you so hard." I curled my hands under my arms and bit the inside of my cheek.  
"Do it." he said simply. "See if you can catch me."  
I didn't move or speak. I knew he could teleport away in the blink of an eye. I wasn't about to make a fool of myself trying to punch him, no matter how badly I wanted to.  
"That's what I thought." he smirked and flickered. "See you later, Touko."  
And damn that boy winked at me and left.


	14. Chapter 14

The sound of music woke me. My eyes flitted open to the broad daylight and I couldn't understand what felt different. My fuzzy vision started to clear and suddenly N was right there, his face just inches from mine, his emerald eyes open wide with expectancy.  
I blinked, unsure of myself, and having forgotten for a moment that once again… I had done this. I had deliberately left my room in the middle of the night to join him in his bed. Something about the night must have gotten to me, because now that I thought about it… I just felt really stupid.  
So what if Tate had left me? Why should I have used it as an excuse to go sleep in N's bed?  
"Good morning." N whispered. I noticed in the light coming from the window, that he had a dark ring of purple around one eye, and his nose looked worse today.  
Horrified I brought my hand up and gently touched the bruises. "I'm so sorry." I mumbled, knowing that the plan with Concordia hadn't worked.  
N just blinked at me, probably not wanting to talk about it. He knew what I meant, and I hoped he could see how terrible I felt for him. Ghetsis had punished him after all.  
"Ghetsis said he wanted to move you to the prison in the basement." N didn't look at me as he spoke. "But I told him I wouldn't allow that. He knew that my orders would prevail over his… and he hit me."  
I pulled my hand up and touched his arm gently. "Now I'm even more sorry… you didn't have to do that for me." Let Ghetsis throw me in the dungeon; he would learn real quick what a pain I could be. He would wish he never captured me to begin with.  
N just stared at me. "I don't want you to feel bad…"  
I rubbed my hand up and down over his bare shoulder, seeing now in the light, just how perfect it was. Every contour of his chest was exposed to me, every vein in his biceps and neck and forearm, every few and far between freckle that I never knew he had. I stared at the beauty of it all for a long moment before N moved and I realized I had been zoning out.  
He pulled back and took a deep breath. "Please don't feel bad because I did this for you."  
I watched in horror as he turned and revealed his back to me. Long welts tattered his shoulder blades and down his spine. I felt my heart skip a beat, seeing the raw patches of skin and the dark bruising from were it looked like he was punched. Tears swelled in my eyes and I pushed myself up, choking with grief.  
"N, I… I don't know what to say…" I sniffed and tears began to pour over my eyelids.  
He pushed back a curtain of hair to hide the scars and turned back to me. His eyes were hard. "Don't be sad… it's not the worst."  
I just shook my head, my mouth open like I was gaping for air. "We—we ha—have to stop this."  
Very gently N wiped a tear from my cheek. "Please don't cry."  
"You don't de—deserve this." I grabbed his hand before he could pull away and I clutched it tightly.  
Once upon a time I had wanted nothing more than to defeat this innocent king. Now I wanted nothing more than to protect him. I held his hand up to my face and forced myself to stop crying, for his sake.  
His fingertips curled around my cheek and he brushed his knuckles along the length of my jaw before pulling his hand away. "I'm not so upset… I was actually happy to stand up to Ghetsis and tell him not to put you in the prison."  
"You got hurt for me." I shuddered.  
"I would have gotten hurt anyways." he repeated what I had said when I asked him to see my pokemon. Was I just the most selfish person on this planet? I wanted to sob but resisted.  
"Thank you for sleeping with me." N said suddenly. That brought my attention back to reality. Had I been in a different state of mind—a normal one—I would have told him the meaning of saying "sleeping with me", but I just couldn't bring myself to explain it right now.  
"Did I wake you up?" I wondered, thinking about how I had fallen asleep so fast at his side. I flinched, remembering that I had curled up into his shoulder blades. Hadn't that hurt him? My stomach curled knowing that I had touched the raw skin and the welts.  
"You kicked me once…" he admitted looking down at the comforter. "But that's ok."  
"I didn't mean to." I sighed, was it possible to hurt him anymore than I already was? Mentally and through his father and now in my sleep. How much worse could it get?  
"I know." He flashed me a weak smile. "It's ok. I like you in my bed."  
I looked around, unsure of what to say. Was I supposed to tell him that I liked being in his bed too? Sometimes I wondered if half the things I said made sense to him, or had a different meaning because he was so innocent.  
A song on the stereo caught my attention. It was soft and tender and every bit as beautiful as N looked in the dark with its blue glow on him. I listened to the opening with a heavy heart. Piano… light and somehow still playing on the strings of my heart. It grew darker, more familiar, and more pressuring as I listened.  
N was listening too.  
The female singer's voice started and I knew instantly who it was. Celine Dion. Something tugged on my heart again and I looked at N, finding him waiting, thinking about the words as they clung to the notes and wrapped us in a private moment of longing.  
"Do you know this song?" he whispered.  
In response I started singing along softly. Celine Dion was one of my all time favorite singers, she had a glorious voice and I memorized every word of every song she sang, even the ones in different languages.  
I looked up at him as the words slipped off my tongue, then cut off, not wanting to make the words sound any more realistic to my life. Was this just a stupid representation like "Set fire to the rain" was? I sighed, trying to ignore the words even more, and finding the piano to be what really burned in my heart.  
Suddenly the song stopped and I jerked upright to see that N had turned the radio off and was looking down at me. A single tear slipped over my cheek and I realized he was trying to prevent more tears.  
I sniffed and wiped my face swiftly. "Sorry… music makes me emotional."  
"I don't want you to be sad." His eyebrows came together.  
"It's ok, really. And I'm not." I told him. "You shouldn't worry about me."  
The silence was long and unbearable. I shook myself free of every unpleasant emotion and forced a happy thought into my mind. The sun outside the window gave me new motive, and when I looked back at N I spoke unexpectedly.  
"Do kings get to take days off?" I mused.  
He looked at me like I was crazy. "I can do whatever I want." He said even though we both new it wasn't true. Apparently doing everything you wanted included boring runarounds through the castle and getting beat by your father.  
"Let's do something fun today."  
His eyes grew lighter, the idea of "fun" giving him a younger expression. He nodded. "What do you want to do?"  
I looked at the window longingly. "What are the odds of going outside?"  
He frowned, fear coloring his gaze,  
"Or not." I sighed.  
"No." he insisted. "We can go out… but you have to… you can't run away." for once the usual reason wasn't there; he didn't want me to run because he wanted me here with him, not because he was afraid.  
To be completely honest I hadn't even considered running away. And I didn't let myself think about it now incase I would be tempted. "I won't." I insisted. "I promise."  
He nodded. "Where do you want to go?"  
I thought briefly about the city for a long moment. It would be a nice change to see something more than trees out a window for once, but at the same time a city would be full of pokemon and people together and that would put N in a bad situation. Was he going to try and liberate while we went out? Would I restrain from cussing him out if he did?  
"I don't care." I said finally. "But let's promise something, ok?"  
"What?"  
"Lets not be king and prisoner today." I spoke with confidence. "Lets just be N and Touko. No capturing, no training on my part. And no liberating on your part."  
He seemed to let it soak in for a long moment before nodding. "Ok." He agreed. "And no running away."  
I smiled, suddenly excited with the thought of going out side. I promised not only him, but myself that we would have a good time today. I vowed not to worry about anything but the exact moment I was living in. All those terrible thought of Ghetsis hurting N, and worrying about Tate and my pokemon and Cheren and Bianca just slipped away as I cleared my mind and thought of nothing but sunshine and fresh air.  
Today would be the best day I had in a long time.

"Where are we going?" I laughed over the roar of Reshiram's engine tail. My hair was blowing back, slapping N in the face no matter how hard he tried to get out of the way of it.  
"You will see!" N yelled back, ducking his face in-between my shoulder blades in attempt to get away. I laughed again.  
N was sitting behind me as Reshiram flew us over towns and forest and many other tiny things miles below us. I couldn't get over how much I loved the way it felt having the wind on my face and the adrenalin and heat of Reshiram's body. The short lived time I knew Zekrom as my partner, he had been hard and cold and very, very powerful. Reshiram was different though. His body was covered in soft white fur and he made me feel like I was sitting on top of the sun.  
We flew at great speeds and I wanted to believe this was how life should have been. I wanted to believe that at the end of today I wouldn't have to return to that dreaded castle. The thoughts were short and insignificant. I stuck to promise I made myself.  
I had worn a pair of tight ripped up jeans and a simple tank top, let my hair down and blown dried it relatively straight. Concordia had been more than happy to supply me with some makeup as well, so I did myself up pretty and curled my lashes tight. My lips were red, my eyes were blue, and my cheeks were a pleasant, warm color.  
N was a little more laid back with his attire. He wore a short sleeve black shirt and a pair of dickies. It was an outfit I had never seen him wear before, but I liked it very much. His hair was wild on Reshiram, but fell pretty much back into place when we slowed down. He had it pulled back in a loose hair tie once we landed around the outskirts of a city all too familiar to me.  
Nimbasa.  
I slipped off of Reshiram, my legs a little wobbly from the flight and my jeans feeling stuck to my thighs. I barely avoided my knees buckling and me making a fool out of myself before I stood.  
"Thanks Reshiram." N gave his legendary friend a pat on the nose before calling him back in the only pokeball he had brought with him today. I had high hopes that despite who he was, the simple boyish look would be enough to hide us from any suspecting eyes. And unless my face was on every milk carton in Unova I knew that no one would know who I was.  
"Ready?" N came to my side and smiled.  
"We're going to Nimbasa?" I looked through the trees to the entrance to the vibrant city. In the distance I could hear screams from people in the amusement park.  
N nodded. "It's the most fun place I could think of."  
I agreed silently and reached out, unthinkingly to take his hand. He flushed a shade darker and blinked at me with his emerald eyes. "You look really… different."  
I laughed. "Is that a good or a bad thing?"  
"Good. I like it… you look pretty." I knew he was trying to figure out a better word on his tongue, before opening his mouth again. I was already matching his shade of red as he spoke. "Beautiful, right? That's what some of the male grunts call girls…"  
I rolled my eyes. "That's right."  
"You look beautiful, Touko." He said again, more confident.  
I blushed and felt my heart grow slightly louder in my chest. "Thank you. You look pretty adorable yourself."  
He flashed his white teeth at me, revealing the one flaw that I found so abnormally perfect. We looked away from each other before walking towards the entrance to the amusement park.  
N paid for an all day pass and made sure the man taking tickets got to keep the change. I wasn't sure what kind of person gave a sixty dollar tip to someone that's job normally didn't receive tips, but I figured N could afford being generous, he was royalty after all.  
The light orange band was snug on my wrist before we entered the park and looked around, still holding each other hands. N's eyes were wild and filled with excitement. He truly looked like a child in that sort of light. It was hard to believe this was the same person I had woken up to find scarred and beaten. If it wasn't for the bruises on his face I was sure to have believed it was all just a dream.  
"What do you want to do first?" N looked down at me. His hand tightened around mine.  
I looked around the park, seeing the world turning with excitement. Families with two or three children were running around frantically trying to keep up with each other, groups of friends walked lazily to benches in the shade of trees, and couples were holding hands and busy sharing ice-cream cones, love shining in there eyes as bright as the sun. I blushed again, wondering if N and I looked like that.  
What caught my attention most though was a sign across from us that was pointing to the water ride down the tree-lined path to our left. The sun felt great, but a cool down would make walking around in it all day easier.  
"Let's go on the water ride." I suggested, giving N a tug.

I was right about today… it had been by far the best day I had had in quite some time. It was probably the best day I have had since the day professor Juniper gave me my starter pokemon and my pokedex. That was a year or so ago, give or take some months.  
N and I had gone on everything from the quiet tour around the park to the wild and crazy roller coaster that made me swallow my stomach about six times.  
I had watched—despite our promise to be just ourselves today—a pokemon battle between a Tepig and a Snivy. N had insisted the Tepig would win because it was a fire type, but I could see that the Snivy was more determined. I bet him another ride on the swings, my favorite, if the Snivy would win; it just so happened that I was right. N had to endure another two minutes of swinging in circles and flying through the air. He was pale and clammy when we got off.  
I held his hand all day, glancing up at his pleasant expression and seeing that a dry moment had never come to his eyes. The sun gleamed on his face and made the bruises almost invisible in the right moment. I was loving everything, even when I sat in gum and had to pry it off of my jeans. N laughed the whole time, a sound I still wasn't used to, so it made it alright, despite the embarrassment. He teased me about it all afternoon.  
After another late trip on the water ride it started to get cold so we found one of those huge human-sized hair dryers and sat in it for a long time, leaning on each other and trying to ignore the way our hair was getting more and more knotted. I had never realized how lovely N could be when he wasn't your rival. He was a gentleman, holding every door open for me, buying me dinner and winning me one of those little plush pokemon. It was a Litwick, with heavy beans in the bottom of it like the stuffed pokemon I collected as a child.  
Not one unpleasant thought ever crossed my mind throughout all the excitement of the day, but I had to admit, I was getting to be somewhat exhausted, which was bringing me down. I felt like the sun setting was bad omen, like as soon as night would fall it would all be over and I would wake up from this beautiful dream. Or more realistically… I knew I would have to go back to team plasma's castle.  
But despite my fears the sunset was stunning, and left me feeling like I was walking on air, and soon it seemed, I actually was. Well… you know, on a ferriswheel though. Close enough.  
N sat next to me as the quiet ride climbed higher to the top and slowed to a stop. I could see everything from up here. The long expanse of desert out one window beyond the city gates, and a scarce forest out the other direction. Orange and red rays lit the area and in the distance I could see that most of who was left at the park was couples.  
A familiar longing grew in my chest and I could feel my promise beginning to slip as I stared off in the distance, trying to imagine I could see across miles and miles of land to my hometown.  
What was Bianca doing right now?  
Was my mother and professor Juniper ok without me?  
I sighed, my high spirits starting to drift between the fine line of sadness and happiness. What a perfect day… of course it had to come to an end.  
N looked down at me when he heard my sigh and gave my hand a squeeze. "What's wrong?"  
I smiled softly at him, determined not to ruin this "Nothing. I was just wishing that today didn't have to end."  
He mimicked the bittersweet look on my face. "I've been thinking that most of today…" he admitted.  
I sighed again and looked back out the window tours the setting sun beyond the mountains. It was hard to imagine that somewhere out there all the people I cared about and loved were still living normal lives. I briefly wondered if Tate was alright, wherever he may be, and my cheek tingled, thinking about the last moment I had spent with him.  
I tried to hide the blush on my face, not because I was thinking about Tate when all day had been spent with N having the time of my life, but because guilt grew in the pit of my stomach. Something in me said Tate wouldn't appreciate my quality time with N. And I was blushing because I knew I didn't care what he thought.  
"What was your favorite part about today?" I asked, trying to lead my thoughts in a better direction.  
He gave my hand another squeeze. "This."  
"But I've been holding your hand all day." I raised an eyebrow at him.  
"I know, and I really enjoy it." he said sheepishly. There was some other emotion in his eyes today… something I couldn't quite put my finger on. It was like he was free… and the depths of his emerald gaze opened up like the expanse of land below us.  
I set my head on his shoulder gently, careful not to agitate the nearby bruises. He shifted down lower so the crook of his neck was snug against my head.  
"I really enjoy that too…" he murmured. "This is my favorite part."  
I wasn't sure what came over me, but as I stared up his jaw line to his purplish cheekbone I realized that this was not the moment I expected to have put myself in. And yet, I didn't bother to stop myself.  
I remembered swiftly, the conversation we had about kisses. I remembered telling him about boyfriends and girlfriends and what it meant to be in love and all that terribly mushy stuff. I remembered Tate kissing my cheek… even that didn't stop me.  
My eyelashes fluttered the way Bianca had once taught me, like little sweeping wings against N's neck, traveling upward to his jaw.  
He looked at me in shock, his eyes blazing with tenderness, but didn't say anything as I shifted upward and tilted my head against his temple. My lashes fluttered along his closed eyelid for a second, and then I moved down his cheek bone, wondering if this counted as a first kiss at all.  
"Butterfree kisses." He said in such a way that I wasn't sure how to respond. It wasn't a question, but not a statement either. He whispered it so softly under his breath I wouldn't have normally noticed.  
Gently I pulled back and looked up at him with half-closed, sleepy eyes.  
"That was my—my favorite part…" he was a shade darker and his fingers were trembling in mine.  
I smiled at his innocence and set my head back down on his shoulder.  
"Should I…" he looked down at me and blinked twice quickly. Without finishing his sentence or getting an answer he bent forward and brushed his eyelashes along my shoulder, his fingers uncurled from mine and my hands were limp as I tipped my head back.  
His fluttering was different than mine, it was sweeping, more concentrated, and I could almost feel the shakiness of his breath, though he was holding it in. Goose bumps raced up my arms and attacked my chest when he let out a puff of air. I brought my hand up and curled a piece of his hair gently, my stomach tingling.  
The butterfree kisses disappeared after a moment, but his nose continued to sweep up my neck. I could feel his hot breath on me now and he stopped with his cheek against my chin, waiting, feeling the skin along my jaw before moving.  
His cheek brushed mine in a very inhuman kind of way. I felt too much like a pokemon getting rubbed by a friend, rather than a girl sharing a moment she would remember her whole life.  
I brought my fingers up slowly and took his face between them, I held him in front of my face and with a hesitant laugh I rubbed the tip of my nose against his. He smiled and blushed before opening his eyes to me.  
"Eskimo kisses?" this time it was a question.  
I nodded. "Right."  
"I—I thought you only did things like this with—  
"Shhh…" I cut him off, not wanting him to ruin it by pointing out the obvious. "There are exceptions to everything."  
The sun was just a faint glow beyond the mountains and I could feel my blood beginning to grow thinner, running too quickly throughout my veins and making me light headed.  
"You know what my favorite part of the day is?" I asked him, tilting my forehead towards his until they touched. My nose skimmed his and I parted my lips and took a deep breath.  
"Hmm?" he squeaked, his eyes closed.  
Every so gently I kissed his lips, forcing myself to be slower than I wanted to be. I wanted to yank my lips away as quickly as I had pressed them to his, but I made a damn good attempt at prolonging the moment.  
He never moved under my kiss, and I could tell he was thinking, trying to remember, perhaps through dizziness, what this kind of kiss was. Not a chocolate, or a butterfree, or an Eskimo. But a real, genuine kiss.  
Finally he shuddered under me and his mouth parted. Whatever human instinct he had, no matter how forgotten it once was, it came back. His fingertips curled around my waist and I pushed down on his soft mouth, allowing myself to breathe in the sweet smell of him and buttery smell of the amusement park that clung to our clothes.  
He pulled in a shaky breath after I curled my hand along the back of his neck and I realized that he was trying to breathe. My foggy mind cleared almost instantly and I pulled back to look at him.  
"Breathe, N." I sighed and let my hands fall in my lap and shrank back, unwilling to believe that I did this to him. My heart was rapid in my chest, and a tiny grin was spreading to the corner of my mouth.  
He swallowed hard and forced air in and out of his lungs. He was nearly hyperventilating.  
"You were right…" he managed to say in a small voice. His eyes were wild with delight and sudden understanding.  
"About what?"  
"I—I am a human." He whispered.


	15. Chapter 15

(back tracking just a bit guys. You will get it though)

~Tate~

"STOP FALLOWING ME!" I snarled at Kayne, who was desperately clutching my shoulder, trying to keep up with me as I ran from ride to ride, checking the lines of people and getting cussed at for shoving them.  
Kayne gripped my shirt collar and tried to hold me back. "Stop drawing attention to yourself!" he begged as I ran back from a crowd and noticed a gift shop. I ignored him and threw open the doors with a bang.  
Blood was boiling in my skin, anger and hate pulsing through me as I scrambled about, looking for Touko anywhere and everywhere. I had even run into a girls bathroom for a few seconds, which made the security get on my case. I kept teleporting out of there reach though. No one could catch me.  
Except Kayne of course. He was the biggest pain in the ass I had ever had to put up with. He was always a heartbeat behind me, his impeccable skill teleporting, almost as good as mine, was keeping him at pace with me. I couldn't get him out of my sight.  
I would have wished Bobby a thousand years in hell if it wasn't for the fact that he was already dead and I wouldn't really mean it. This was still his fault, for making sure Kayne understood he was to stay with me no matter what I said. Bobby was full of B.S. though. He said he wanted me watching after Kayne because he was the youngest and was still alive, but I knew he really wanted Kayne watching me. He wanted Kayne to be a wedge between me and Touko.  
As if I needed another one…  
I was about to teleport to the opposite end of the park once again when suddenly I spotted a tall figure with a bruised face and green hair walking through the crowds. I flitted forward, ignoring the confused gasps from the uninformed people around. No one had to know why I was teleporting or who I was. I knew all of them would think I was part of this park anyways, an illusionist here to entertain.  
I grabbed the beanie I brought out of my back pocket and through it on quickly, knowing that without my eye-catching white hair Touko wouldn't recognize me. Not easily at least…  
I watched from about four people back as N walked quickly to a park map. Touko was no where to be seen but I knew he would lead me back to her eventually. I glowered as he turned, his eyes showing the same pathetic child emotions they always did. He started walking back my direction, and as I passed by I pulled on a pair of sunglasses. No one would notice me.  
He walked my way as I walked his, and I prayed that Kayne wasn't so stupid as to be seen by the "king". I held my breath as he came within reach and unable to control myself I stepped ever so slightly in the way.  
Our shoulders collided and I may have put more force into it than necessary. A sharp hiss slipped through his teeth and he turned to apologize—as if it was his fault—but I was already gone. What a wimp, I snorted and spit on the pavement. Who lets s little bump to the shoulder hurt them?  
Kayne appeared at my side as I slowed to a stop and turned to find N's back walking away from me.  
"Are you crazy!" Kayne punched me in the chest to get my attention. "What do you think you are doing? Running into Lord N on purpose!" he threw his arms up and glared. "Are you trying to get us killed?"  
"I'm already dead." I bared my teeth at him and pushed him aside. "And I told you I don't serve N anymore, I don't care what he or the rest of team Plasma thinks of me."  
"You are so stupid sometimes." Kayne fallowed me tirelessly as I walked through the on-coming traffic and kept N in sight. Finally he turned the corner onto another pathway, one lined with trees and bushes to shade the area from the hot sun.  
I watched as he walked to a bench and sat down to wait.  
"Watch it!" someone said to me as I held up the line of people trying to walk by. Kayne shoved me out of the way of the person and I curled my hands up into fists. He pushed me along the edge of the walk until the ropes ended and I was able to step behind the cover of some foliage.  
I ducked down and had a perfect view of N from here. Kayne was too close to me, terrified for what reason I wasn't sure, but breathing down my neck. I was about to punch him in the arm for the third time today but suddenly Touko was in sight. My heart—if it was beating—would have galloped at the sight of her.  
She was wearing tight—and I mean TIGHT—jeans with rips all in them. They were wet and so was her tank top. Something in me stirred and I realized I wasn't close enough. I filtered my energy on her and the mass of plants closest, but far enough away to where I wouldn't be seen.  
I teleported, leaving Kayne one second behind once again. The bush trembled but no one seemed to notice. I strained to listen.  
"Shh!" I commanded to Kayne before he could say anything. His mouth shut with a snap and he folded his arms.  
Touko was bright red, her hands behind her back as she bound over to N. Her voice was a tight, frantic whisper, yet humor colored her tone.  
"Is there gum on my butt?" she turned to show her back side to N, and I didn't miss the lack of excitement from him. What wouldn't I give to have Touko turn to me like that? And even so, I had to choke back a laugh.  
"Only on the button." N's quiet voice spoke and I could see he wasn't sure of himself.  
If it was me I would have grabbed that gum so fast…  
Touko groaned and her eyes rolled. "It wont come off." she—to my horror—held her hand out to N. He took it and stood up off the bench quickly. My skin must have been on fire…  
I watched as the two of them walked, N blocking the view of her ass, across the pathway tours the bathroom signs. How easily would it have been for me to just teleport into the girl's bathroom right now and surprise her…  
Unfortunately I would have to surprise quite a few other women as well… and I already had one security officer on my case.  
I strained to listen as there voices grew further away.  
They were laughing. My heart sank and I hung my head. Touko would never want me if I ruined this for her… she was finally out of team plasma's castle, how could I take that away from her? She looked like she was having fun… why would I ruin that? For my own selfish desires…  
I was a very selfish and jealous person…  
But her voice… her laugh, it was holding me back. I restrained myself and turned to Kayne, the blood draining from my sweaty face. I had explained how I felt about Touko to him after Bobby ruined my chances of ever living alone. Kayne was surprisingly ok with the whole thing, which was nice, but he still thought I was bat-shit crazy.  
Despite how much I hated having to share these feelings with someone, I was glad it was Kayne. He was still alive… he felt these emotions more often than I did and I knew he would understand more over anyone else. Especially Bobby.  
I had punched the poor kid in the shoulder out of my own anger for crying out loud! And yet… here he was, right at my side making sure I didn't do something I would regret. Not to say he hadn't taken a few shots at me to return the favor… but he was still on my side.  
He shook his head. "Sorry man…"  
"You don't know how it feels." I hissed. "You haven't been in love. So don't feel sorry for me."  
"Stop trying to be a tough ass." He rolled his eyes. Sometimes I felt like Kayne was taking on too many of my bad habits.  
"I don't have to be anything I don't want to be. Not around you I don't." I looked back at Touko disappearing in the girls bathroom while N waited patiently.  
He was never alone… as a king he had to be protected all the time… and yet here he was, completely alone and perfectly fragile. I could break his nose… I could kick his royal ass so easily… but Touko would never forgive me.  
She doesn't have to know…  
No…  
I fought with myself, back and fourth, wondering how long it would take to get my point across. Kayne would probably stop me anyways…  
Not to mention from the looks of it, someone had beaten me—literally—to the punch, judging by N's bruised face. A very small part of me imagined Touko hitting him, and a very huge part of me enjoyed it.  
"Let's get out of here." Kayne sighed. "You know you can't do anything now."  
Touko came out of the bathroom a moment later, her jeans gum-free and her eyes still sparkling with humor. I couldn't hear what N said to her, but it made them both laugh. I felt wretched inside and wanted to vomit acid all over N.  
My nostrils flared with hate and I turned back to Kayne, knowing despite my anger, that he was right. "Fine." I said through gritted teeth. My eyes flickered back to N and Touko though, once more before I teleported away.  
She was mine…

~Touko~

The light always looked more beautiful coming from N's window, rather than the one in my room below. Golden rays cast through the sweeping, see-through curtains and showered my face. It was warm and felt amazing. I breathed in a deep breath, thinking that this couldn't have felt more wonderful.  
I turned to the side gently, rolling between the sheets and facing the other direction, tours the piano. My hands searched the bed for N and I was starting to come out of the bliss. My head was foggy until I opened my eyes and saw that he was no where to be found.  
I shot up in an instant, looking to the window to see how high the sun was up. Surely he wouldn't have left for patrol already?  
"N?" I said in a low voice.  
There was no reply, just a deep confusion settling in my chest. I suddenly felt alone, and the water that poured down between the railing was trickling too loudly.  
N had been so happy yesterday… surely he wouldn't have gone back into the old routine so quickly? Didn't… what happened… mean anything to him? I stared around the empty feeling room, losing all the tender feelings I had woken up with.  
I had spent all night dreaming about N. I had dreamt that me and him escaped from this place. We ran away together…  
Was I being too fairytale-ish? So what if we had spent the day together holding hands and laughing at nothing. Who cares if I had kissed him…  
My heart felt numb for having thought that maybe that perfect day could have lasted. I kicked the blankets off of me and swung my legs over the end of the bed. My hair felt tangled and while I rubbed my face I could feel where the blanket had left creases on my skin.  
"N?" I called again, walking tours the submarine door and opening it. I started to climb down the spiral staircase slowly, looking around the room somewhat frantically. Something felt different about the air.  
When I didn't see N anywhere I called out to Crypt very softly. He would have heard it… he always heard when I called, whether it was a whisper or not. Anyone would have heard me now though, it was too silent…  
The air was thinner I decided, when Crypt didn't come. Something in me stirred, Crypt didn't usually leave until after I got up in the morning and started working out, where could he have gone already?  
I never asked Crypt where he went during the daytime, I trusted him enough to come back safely so it didn't bother me. He usually came back before N did during the day which gave us some time together anyways, and still… something felt different.  
I never kept Crypt in his pokeball because I knew if someone found it they would take it, and I didn't want them to happen to find it while he was inside, they he wouldn't be able to defend himself. I figured if he was kept out of it then at least he had a fighting chance.  
Even so, I walked swiftly over to the end of my huge, perfectly made bed and got down to me knees. I glanced around once again; making sure no one was around. I had a habit of checking the window to see if anyone was there, even though we were way too high off the ground for that to be possible without a pokemon.  
I slipped under the bed and army crawled to the back where I left the dusk ball. There was no where else in this terrible place to hide something except for in the bed. I had ripped a hole in the bottom of the box spring and shoved the pokeball up in there.  
When I flipped over onto my back though, and twisted my fingers into the hole above me I couldn't feel anything. The pokeball could have rolled around inside the box spring but it should have come right back down to the slant the rip made.  
I reached my arm inside and fished for the pokeball, and groaning when there was nothing. Was that why N wasn't here this morning? Had he found Crypt's pokeball?  
Had he found Crypt? My heart nearly stopped…  
Not only did that mean I lost my favorite—my only—ghost type, my only pokemon in this place, but I had let Tate down… he told me not to let him get caught… and I had this horrible feeling that Crypt had indeed gotten caught.  
Who would have been so determined to search my room for a pokeball? The only person I could think of was N because he would have found Crypt first. N had a way with pokemon, I wasn't surprised—just a little pissed off—that he had found him. It really was just a matter of time.  
I stared at the bottom of the bed, trying not to think the worse of this situation. Maybe someone had found the pokeball and not found Crypt? I knew it wasn't rational to think that… because it made no sense… but I had to hope.  
Tate would be so disappointed in me… he may leave me and not want to be my friend anymore. I sighed heavily and started crawling out from under the bed. I squirmed beneath the metal frame and sat cross legged on the other side, staring at my hands in my lap.  
How had things gone from amazing to ruined within ten minutes?  
"Miss Touko?" A familiar voice made me jolt upright.  
I scrambled to my feet and ran to the huge door as a faint knock sounded. Concordia waited on the other side. I opened it to find her holding my usual tray of breakfast, and her soft face looked worried. I looked down at myself to make sure I didn't look like the mess I felt. Nothing was out of place… my hair was a little crazier than normal but that was it.  
"Thank you, Concordia." I said in a low voice. My sadness must have shown on my face, because she didn't hand me the tray as quickly as she normally would have.  
"Are you ok, Miss Touko?" she worried.  
"Yeah… Yeah I'm fine." I tried to perk up and make myself sound more like I normally did. A girl like me would have all the reason in the world to be depressed wouldn't she? After all I was technically a prisoner… It was a terrible excuse I knew… but I still hoped.  
"Oh… ok." She said, handing me the tray of eggs and the bottle of orange juice. Orange juice tended to give me heartburn, and my stomach was already in a knot.  
"Umm, Concordia?" I stopped her as she turned to walk back down the hallway. She looked back at me.  
"Do you know if N is doing his patrol right now?" I asked, trying to hide the fear in my voice.  
The worry in her eyes seemed to sharpen as she stared back at me. "I don't think he has even started the patrol yet actually. Lord N said he had something more important to attend to this morning."  
I nodded solemnly and felt absolutely miserable as I turned to shut the door. Something important to do… Was he releasing my pokemon? Was he taking Crypt to the rest of my bunch? The same loneliness I felt after losing Mienshao hit me and I wanted to cry.  
I dumped the tray of food quickly and took a tiny sip of the orange juice just to clear my tight throat. It didn't help. The depression was setting in.  
I scuffed my feet along the plush carpet and walked over to my bed. Without thinking much of it I flopped down and curled up into a ball. What was I going to say to N when he came back? What would he have to say to me? I knew I wasn't supposed to have a pokemon here… but a part of me was growing into an angry flame. Didn't he realize I was capable of being with pokemon? Obviously Crypt wanted to be with me… So N really had no reason to take him away.  
If this was some scheme having to do with his liberation I would be furious. I wanted so badly to believe that he cared more about my feelings than to just take my pokemon like that. Didn't that kiss mean anything?  
I sighed.


	16. Chapter 16

N~

I paced outside the huge door to Touko's room, trying to rework the words in my head to sound more understandable. She would be so sad… and I didn't want to make her sad… but her having a pokemon in her room was too dangerous.  
Ghetsis and every other sage had a key to her room and had the ability to hurt her if she stepped out of line. I wanted… despite myself I wanted her to be happy and have her pokemon with her. I had spoken with all of her former team members and every one of them was as loyal to her as gravity was to the world. I got the idea that Touko WAS their world.  
Samorott was brave and patient. He would have waited a lifetime for her without question. Unfezant was more selfish, and barely spoke to me at all. I knew he would devote the same attention to her but he wasn't as pronounced about it. Reuniclus was somewhat frightening. She had a master mind, something beyond what even a human could understand. She—if she really wanted to—could have deformed the ways of her world as easily as if she snapped her fingers. It made me wonder why she hadn't taken action yet…  
Eelektross… well he was frightened… and not nearly as loyal to Touko as her other pokemon were. He was going crazy cooped up here, without the same persistence as the others. He had tried to take a liking to me even, just to be able to do something, anything other than sit around and wait. I hadn't told Touko… but I released him a week after she got here. He had left with little hesitation and I knew he was happier.  
Scrafty… He wouldn't even look me in the eyes when he spoke his mind so freely. He hated me and everything about me and on Touko's command would gladly kill me. I knew pokemon didn't lie… but I wasn't afraid of him. He was just hurt.  
Touko had told me once that Scrafty loved Mienshao. I wasn't sure what that kind of emotion could feel like between pokemon, let alone between human beings, so when I spoke to Scrafty I was shocked. He had even shed a tear for the fallen pokemon… Mienshao.  
His heart was broken, which was making him violent. I wanted so desperately to bring him—even more than the others—to Touko, so she could comfort him. I hated seeing pokemon suffering, even if they hated me.  
All of Touko's pokemon deserved to see her. They were falling into a slow, dragging depression without their trainer… their friend. But none of them was as terrible as what I had felt during Mienshao's dying mind.  
I didn't resort back to the memory often, because I didn't understand what she was saying to me at the time. I wasn't sure if I understood correctly now… but she had said that sometimes… no matter what the circumstances were, you just didn't give up. She had hit the wall with such force that her mind had crumbled inside of her, and yet what she said to me while she choked on her crushed lungs was more than I could have ever been able to bear.  
She had told me not to give up. She said that she hadn't given up. She said she would die trying and that I should to. Mienshao had not been angry with me for losing the battle, because she didn't think of it as a loss… she wasn't even disappointed with herself. She had said simply that if I tried hard enough, I would achieve.  
At the time I was sure she meant liberation…  
Now I knew I had misunderstood. She had meant something about my heart. She had said that I would find myself. And I had never expected a dying pokemon to have such effect on me. How this pokemon understood me… like she was my friend, it baffled me. Why should Mienshao have had such an impact on my heart when she had never even seen it?  
Her dying speech had been what brought tears to my eyes, not just the fact that she was gone. I felt like I was dying as well, like she was taking a part of me away with her as she left this world. But it hadn't been a good part. She had taken something bad… she had taken my one track, too manipulated mind with her.  
I had been skeptical of myself since her death… but I never felt more unsure than I did right now.  
My hands were shaking as I pushed the door open and looked inside. Touko wasn't in my sight at first, so I stepped in and shut the door behind me.  
She was sitting on the royal blue sofa looking out the huge window, and didn't move a muscle as I walked over to her. My heart sank and I knew she knew that I had taken her pokemon. I hadn't expected her not to notice… but it still made me feel awful.  
I walked over quietly and came around the opposite side of the couch. I put my hands in my pockets and looked down at her. She still avoided my gaze, just staring out the window like she was lost.  
"Touko…" I said softly.  
Finally her dark blue eyes turned up to mine. The light coming in from the window made her look somewhat possessed. I flinched and sat down on the furthest cushion from her.  
She brought her legs up tighter under her and pulled a throw pillow up to her chest. "You… you found him." she whispered.  
Despair flooded my chest and I felt like I was drowning. Even my thoughts sounded like they were under water. I closed my eyes and sighed. "Yes…"  
"And… you just… took him…" she assumed.  
"I had to." I whispered. "Its not—  
"Yeah I know!" suddenly she snapped. "It's not right to keep pokemon in their pokeballs and pokemon and people should be segregated so they can be perfect beings and equals to human." Her voice turned extremely bitter.  
I flinched again. That wasn't what I had been going to say… I had been going to say it's not safe for her to have a pokemon here. But my voice was caught in my throat and I had to swallow it back down, making it harder to breathe, let alone speak.  
She took my silence as assurance. "You know… I respect you for how you feel about pokemon… but I thought that maybe…" she stood as she said this. "I thought… maybe we had something more than just respect for each other."  
I had always wondered what it felt like to have a broken heart. And as I watched Touko walk away, grief and regret shrouding her tone, I suddenly understood.  
A broken heart was that feeling when you knew that you had done something that would hurt someone you care about. A broken heart was having your one and only friend turn her back on you because she felt like you betrayed her. A broken heart was the way it felt to have nothing, not even your dignity left to help you stand up and stop her from leaving.  
A broken heart was the scars on my back, the lack of air in my lungs… and the tears pouring down my face.


	17. Chapter 17

One terribly long week, seven torturous days, one hundred sixty eight hours of hell had gone by without talking to N.  
I was a mess.  
Every evening I spent sitting alone, curled up on the bed wondering what to do with myself, wishing that I had Crypt with me to waft against my skin, or Tate here to make me laugh, or Mienshao to curl up at the foot of my bed, or that I would just wake up from this terrible dream altogether.  
I watched N walk past me every morning, and I watched him walk past every evening to go to his room once again. He wasn't playing his piano at night, and that made me feel like I had taken the music out of him. I was so guilty I couldn't stand it.  
I had run away from the problem when it approached me… instead of talking to N like a normal human being would have I freaked out. I had gone into the hallway and sat in the storage room, cussing at grunts that dared enter all that night. I had cried, missing my pokemon, missing Tate, missing my mother and Cheren and Bianca and Professor Juniper. But mostly I missed N.  
I couldn't stand being upset with him. I hated what he did to me, but I was so strung up on him that I could hardly think straight. All I knew was that I had gotten my pokemon taken away from me and that I wasn't going to be getting Crypt, or any of them for that matter, back soon. The more I thought about it, the more I realized I wanted nothing more than to throw my arms around my pokemon and hug them to death. It would be hard to hug Crypt, but I would find a way.  
The only thing perhaps, that I wanted more than to hug my pokemon, was to hug N. I just wanted to see him smile again. I wanted to curl my fingers in his hair and hug him like I never hugged him before. It was impossible though…  
Our friendship was at a standstill. It was only a matter of time before one of us cracked though, and I was determined not to degrade myself by doing it first. Yes I wanted N back… but I had to put my pokemon in mind too. So it was either I crack now and be friends with N without my pokemon… or I wait and see what happens. If N cracks I would get my pokemon back and him back… but who knows when that would be… Who knows if N would ever crack?  
I looked out the window at the sliver of a mood stretching high above the low, dark grey clouds. It was one of those nights when lightening flashed ever few moments, and thunder was rolling in the distance. Mienshao and I used to stay up on nights like this to watch the storm overhead.  
I sighed. Ever since all this happened I couldn't get Mienshao off my mind… I was missing her more and more. It was like without N I had to have Mienshao, and without Mienshao I had to have N. It seemed one of them was necessary for my sanity at all times.  
Rolling over onto my side I covered my face, bringing the pillow up to cover my ears from the never ending trickling sound of the fountains pouring down from N's floor to mine. It wasn't helping, and I knew this would just be another sleepless night, so I got up and decided I might as well try and make it interesting.  
I sat on the blue couch and curled up to watch the storm. I knew that tonight would have been an eerie silent one if it wasn't for the thunder. It would have been one of those nights that made me think I was being watched.  
Something about sleeping on the couch felt immoral when I had such a comfortable bed, but I couldn't bring myself to move again. I felt like if I did go back to the bed, the effort it would take to move would be enough to wake me up completely again, and then the effort would be pointless anyways.  
So I stayed put, trying to drown in the inner turmoil and just sleep. I was almost there, nearing the blackness when something caught my attention. A heavy footstep, fallowed by a much lighter one.  
I jerked my eyes open to find a figure looming over me. I almost shrieked but a familiar, cold hand was shoved over my mouth.  
"So Crypt got caught huh?" Tate's bitter voice made my stomach curl. He pulled his hand away, now sure that I knew it was him, and sat beside me on the couch. I would have been angry at him for disturbing me when I was so close to finally sleeping, but I hadn't seen him in over a week.  
"I—I'm so sorr—  
"Don't worry about it. I will find him and bring him back." though his voice was still hard, I could see the crooked smile on his lips. The faint light was just enough to reflect in his silver eyes.  
"Tate… I didn't mean for this to happen…" I whispered, not sure what exactly to tell him. Last I had spoken to him he said that he would be gone for a few days. An intense curiosity nagged at my heart. A few days to a normal person would be two or three, not a week and two days.  
"Touko, its fine." Tate insisted. "Just leave it to me ok?"  
I nodded, not feeling any better.  
"Are you worried about Crypt?" He asked. "You shouldn't be. Ghost pokemon are my specialty. I will find him easy."  
"I'm worried about Crypt and all my pokemon…" I said. Part of me wanted to tell Tate all about how I was missing N and his company… but something convinced me otherwise. I just couldn't see Tate sympathizing with me over N. He never seemed all that fond of his former king.  
And what if I got stuck having to explain my day in Nimbasa to him? I was positive that would NOT go over well.  
"Don't worry." He dismissed it quickly. "Remember how I said one of the other shadow triad had gotten caught?"  
I nodded. "You said you would be gone a couple days…"  
He didn't understand what my words really went. That or he didn't realize how much time had really gone by. "Right, well it turns out he wasn't captured, he actually went willingly."  
I looked at him in surprise. "He went back to team Plasma on his own? But I thought you couldn't serve plasma because I had defeated them…"  
Tate shook his head. "I forgot about that."  
"What?"  
"I lied. Team Plasma didn't catch Bobby; we thought that Team Rocket had captured him for investigation. They are huge in Kanto. But that's not the point. Bobby wants to serve Team Rocket, he went to them."  
"But… why?"  
"Because he doesn't know any other way of life."  
"No. I mean why did you lie to me?" I asked, playing with the little tag on the corner of a pillow. "And you were gone for a week…"  
His silver eyes turned suddenly soft. "I'm sorry… I got caught up… and I have been in charge of the third team plasma member. He is the youngest, I couldn't leave him alone."  
"Yeah right! You wanted to leave me. But you promised Bobby." Suddenly a shrill, too loud voice sounded.  
I jumped and looked behind me, seeing across the room was another figure. The lightening flashed again and I could see the most recognizable of the plasma members. His hair was about the same length of Tate's, but didn't fall in quite the same fashion. He was shorter, with thicker shoulders. And most importantly he had icy blue eyes.  
"Shhhh!" Tate hissed. "Stop yelling."  
I was watching the submarine door for any signs of movement, so I didn't notice when the youngest boy came over and plopped down on the couch next to Tate. I would be lucky if N thought his voice was more thunder and didn't bother to come down.  
"Touko." Tate brought my attention back. "This is my youngest brother Kayne. Kayne, Touko." He looked annoyed.  
"Umm… Nice to meet you." I said softly, glancing back up the submarine door. I was almost positive a part of me wanted to see N come downstairs to check on me. At least that would prove he still cared.  
"You were right, Tate." Kayne scoffed. "She's a real winner."  
Tate smacked him in the stomach. I didn't take Kayne's remark as unfriendly to me, just something to get on his brother's nerves. Even so, I flushed.  
"Shut up." Tate rolled his eyes and smiled at me, determined to be unfazed. "So come on, spit it out. What's wrong?"  
I swallowed awkwardly and played with the tag on the pillow some more. "I'm just worried about Crypt and my other pokemon… N took Crypt away and I'm afraid he will release them all now."  
That wasn't all a lie, though I was pretty sure N wouldn't release me pokemon. He had to value me as a human being at least… If he did he wouldn't release my pokemon. If he valued my sanity at all he wouldn't release them.  
"I told you not to worry. We will get them." he assured.  
"What do you mean we?" Kayne demanded. "I said I would come with you here but I was not going to be your or her slave."  
"That's not slavery, that's a friendly order from your older brother." Tate flashed his white teeth.  
"Well it's still going against Team Plasma… I won't do that."  
Tate let out a short, frustrated breath before looking back at me. "I will get them back." he muttered.  
"How?" I didn't realize until now that, as much as I wanted my pokemon back… I really just wanted N to be the one to give them back to me… Plus if I just magically had my pokemon back, N would never forgive me or let me go without demanding how.  
"Don't worry about it." Tate was just so high and might wasn't he?  
I sighed. "Tate if you just bring my pokemon back to me, someone will notice and then I will be in trouble or you will get caught…"  
"So you don't want me to rescue them?"  
"No!" I shook my head. "I mean… I do… I just… I know they would find out and then they would just take them away from me again."  
"You do realize once you have your pokemon we can bust you out of here right?" he looked at me like I was stupid.  
It hadn't even crossed my mind… I racked my brain for an excuse.  
"Unless you want to stay?" he said in a sickly smooth tone.  
"No… of course not… it's just they have my friend Cheren here too… I can't leave him behind either."  
"Do you know where they have him? I can get him too."  
I shook my head, not exactly sure why I was lying. Something just wasn't right with me. Even now… with every opportunity to get my pokemon back and leave this place… to see my mother again and Bianca and professor Juniper… I just suddenly felt like the only thing that mattered was making sure N wasn't mad at me… and that our friendship had another chance.  
Again I looked at the submarine door.  
"You really look miserable." Tate commented. "You sure that's all that's bothering you?"  
Kayne muffled a laugh I didn't understand, which made Tate shoot him a death glare.  
"I'm fine." I tried my best to sound somewhat ok. "So tell me about what happened with, Bobby right?"  
Kayne's eyes lit up. "I got to destroy an underground base with my Garchomp."  
That caught my attention. How could such a young teen have that much power… to control a Garchomp? From what I knew of, those dragon pokemon had nasty attitude problems. But more than that I was surprised.  
"Another foreign type?" I looked at Tate then back to Kayne. "Do you all raise foreign pokemon?"  
"I only raise dragon types." Kayne said proudly. "But not just foreign ones… it just so happens Garchomp is my only pokemon and he is foreign."  
"That's cool." I said mildly polite, my heart wasn't in it.  
"Do you have any dragon types?"  
"No…" I shook my head. "I have mostly the basics. Fighting, water, electric, flying. I do have a physic type." I added, thinking about all my team.  
Tate laughed once. "What a battle that would be huh?"  
"What?"  
"My ghost type's against your physic type."  
I thought about it and wondered if Reuniclus would have a chance against a Gengar or Froslass. The odds weren't good based on type alone, but I sure liked the idea of a good battle right now.  
"My Garchomp could beat your Gengar, Tate." Kayne challenged.  
"You're full of yourself." He leaned back until he was pressed up against my side, his back facing me. I may have stiffened a little bit, but he just looked so relaxed. "Gengar would fair perfectly fine against that disobedient dragon. And Froslass would have him down in a heartbeat."  
"Well Froslass is an ice type!"  
I ignored their debate and looked around, trying to imagine myself sitting here alone staring out the window, waiting, wondering if I could fall asleep. Would I be asleep by now if they hadn't shown up? The back and fourth arguing was making me uncomfortable. I didn't have siblings; I didn't know what it was like to even have a sibling figure in my life, so this was weird. Kayne punched Tate in the arm and one point.  
"Hey!" I put my hand on the cool spot were he had hit him. "What was that?"  
Tate laughed and glanced back at me, he was sliding down so that his legs were being pushed up against Kayne and his head was resting on my side. "Brotherly love." He snorted.  
I frowned.  
"Love hurts." Kayne crossed his arms. Tate lifted his foot to kick him in the side. I watched as he disappeared with no time to spare, leaving me and Tate alone on the couch.  
It grew awkward with Tate laying halfway on me. He yawned and brought his hand up to lay it against his forehead. I bit the inside of my cheek, remembering how he had kissed it the last time he saw me.  
Did he remember?  
I sure didn't. Well… of course I remembered he did it, but it was almost like it had never even happened. My heart stuttered. I remembered kissing N as clearly as if it had happened only a moment ago. The same faint feeling would attack my head every once in a while when I thought about how lovely a first kiss could be.  
If you wanted to get technical, my first kiss was a Hershey kiss, and my second was a kiss on the cheek, then a butterfly kiss, and then just a regular one. But as far as lips to lips, an actual, genuine kiss. N was my very first.  
The sadness was creeping up in side my heart again. It hadn't left… but it was getting stronger again.  
"Where did Kayne go?" I asked to distract myself.  
Tate shrugged. "I don't know but that feels really great."  
I looked down at my hands, realizing that I had replaced—without knowing—the tag of the pillow with Tate's thick hair. I pulled my hands away, surprised with myself and stopped.  
Tate opened his eyes and looked back at me. "Well ok then…"  
I blushed. "Sorry. I thought I was still playing with the pillow." His model face was soft, almost tired looking.  
"So what?"  
I forced myself to smile back at him, but it was kind of fake and sheepish as I grabbed a piece of his wintry hair and played with it again. He sighed and closed his eyes.  
"So how were you while I was gone?"  
My stomach twisted into a knot. I had to swallow before answering. "Just… kind of mopey I guess."  
"At least you weren't baby sitting the whole time."  
"Kayne seems like he could take care of himself." If the boy could train a dragon pokemon I was sure he was capable of being on his own. Even if he was younger than me and Tate.  
"Oh he is… he would be best off on his own, finding his own path in life, but Bobby insisted."  
"Why are you listening to Bobby?" I wondered. Tate had mentioned quarreling with is shadow triad siblings before.  
He shrugged again. "I don't know. I guess it's because I don't want to fight with him… and it's only a matter of time before Kayne moves on anyways. He won't want to just sit around with me all day."  
"So does that mean you will be around?" I mused, trying not to wonder if he would understand my position with N, then I remembered N and I were kind of out of luck right now. Tate being here wouldn't make a difference to that.  
"As much as I was before." He said.  
"Oh, ok." I ran my fingers down his hair, thinking that I would still have the nights to myself. If I ever got the chance to spend them with N again… I wouldn't have to worry about Tate showing up and thinking the worst.  
"I missed you a lot Touko." He said suddenly, his voice alluring and almost as luxurious as he looked.  
The normal attraction I felt for him was gone though. "I… I missed you too." I said half-heartedly. I had missed him… but not as much as I was missing N right now. To be completely honest with myself… I was wishing that this was N with his head in my lap, not Tate.  
He looked back up at me, some strange emotion in his eyes. His silver eyes were striking as lightening flashed in the window. Thunder fallowed shortly, cutting the silence and making at awkward.  
"Really?" Tate whispered. "Did you really miss me?"  
I nodded.  
Something in his eyes told me he didn't believe me.  
I shivered.

(those of you who read regularly please leave me comments! It would be really nice to hear what you all are thinking as you read.) 3


	18. Chapter 18

~N~

"Lord N, please… what's bothering you?" Anthea begged for the hundredth time. Concordia sat on the corner chair in the large office, with her hands folded in her lap full of papers  
"Lord N, you did it again." Concordia stood up suddenly. "You signed this paperwork stating that this business could keep making pokemon clothing."  
I sighed. "Give it here."  
She handed it to me reluctantly and I read over the guidelines once again. She was right… and this was the second time I had signed something I should have denied, simply because I wasn't paying attention.  
The first time I had done this Ghetsis had stabbed me in the shoulder with a hard stake of some sort. It was the only thing near him at the time, and the black metal tip had ripped a deep gash in my shoulder. I felt queasy thinking about it, and felt numb thinking about what he would do to me this time.  
"Do we have another form?" I whispered crumpling the ruined one up and tossing it in a recycling bin at my feet.  
"Yes, Sir." Concordia left to go get it in an instant. I hid my face in my hands, trying not to groan or look pained, but feeling very terrible. There was a notebook in front of me with tally marks on it from a previous counting I had done. I forgot what it had been fore exactly, and without thinking much of it I started doodling on the lined paper.  
"Lord N, won't you please let us help you. Why are you so upset?" Anthea asked again, sitting by my side and reaching out to touch my hand.  
I yanked away, and looked at the floor. I wanted to tell her not to touch me and leave me alone, but that would be rude. She was only doing her job. I scribbled out the pokeball I had drawn, trying to imagine a world were I could scribble out all the pokemon trainers. It was my biggest dream at one point…  
All I wanted now was for Touko to forgive me. Every night I stayed up late, wondering if I should try and play my piano, then giving up hope when I convinced myself it wouldn't work. Touko was stubborn… and she had every right to be…  
How could I give her back her pokemon though? How could I take that chance of Ghetsis or any other sages finding out? They would execute Touko…  
I wanted to throw up at the very thought.  
"Here you are, Lord N." Concordia was back again with another identical form. She set it in front of me and then dipper her head. She tended to be more aware of my personal space lately, while Anthea just pried for details. It was getting to be a problem.  
"Just put an x in this box." Anthea assured as my pen hovered over the two possibly boxes. I read the sentences over and over again, but they sounded the same to me. I just couldn't focus.  
I marked the one she pointed to and then signed my name on the line just below it.  
N Harmonia… the king of Team Plasma, the future ruler of this whole region, the segregator of pokemon and people that was set out to create a better world. I sighed; none of those things mattered anymore.  
My whole world had turned black and white in an instant. I couldn't take it any longer.  
"How are Touko's pokemon, Anthea?" I murmured, pushing the signed paper over and pulling up the next in the stack to look at.  
"The same as usual." She said, knowing that I asked the same thing every day, hoping that maybe sometime it would have a different answer.  
"I would like to see them today." I didn't look up as my heart raced in my chest. I knew what I had to do.  
"Yes, Sire" she bowed her head to me. "I can take you to them after—  
"I want them." I said suddenly.  
"E-excuse me?" she blinked in surprise.  
"I want to take care of them now. You can be off duty." My voice grew harder as I scribbled my signature onto another paper. I reread it three times, knowing that it was the right line before passing it onto Concordia, who was peeling stamps out of a booklet.  
"Yes… Lord N." Anthea agreed reluctantly, not daring question me.  
"How is Miss Touko lately?" Concordia murmured in her most friendly voice. She and Anthea knew that this was the source of my depression lately. I didn't like it… I wanted them to just leave me alone.  
"Please stop." I said, getting to my feet and leaving he chair pushed out and the papers unstacked for the goddesses to finish.  
"My apologies, Lord N…" they said shamefully, echoing each other.  
I shut the door with a thud.

…

I was wrapped up in a towel, my hair still dripping wet one morning, a week and four days since N and I had our downfall. Neither of us had broken down yet and even apologized to each other, and I was beginning to think it wasn't worth it anymore. I couldn't possibly be so miserable just because he wouldn't talk to me.  
Like always I walked through a line of oncoming grunt traffic to my room and slinked inside the huge door. It shut heavily behind me and I looked around swiftly, making sure the submarine door was shut before pulling the towel off of me and running it through my hair once again. I shivered and bounded over on my tip-toes to the end of my bed. The towel dropped to be around my feet and I grabbed the first pair of underwear I saw.  
I got dressed hastily, not caring much about what I was throwing on over a pair of black sweats. With jerky movements I took the towel off the floor and through it in the basket of dirty clothes. When I looked back across the bed I was shocked to find a perfectly folded note.  
I reached for it, praying, but trying not to get my hopes up too much. My heart soared as I opened it; sure enough N's neat handwriting was scrawled across the page.

Get what is under the bed… and if you forgive me, please come upstairs.  
N

I bent down instantly and looked under my bed. It was a bit hard to see anything, so I started crawling, my blood roaring in my ears.  
He cracked… he gave up trying to stay away from me, I know it. He is giving me my pokemon back… Crypt at least.  
I shoved my arm through the box spring and fished around for pokeballs. My hand came in contact with something, but it wasn't what I wanted. Reluctantly I pulled it out and squinted to see what it was.  
A Hershey kiss.  
My face fell, was this really happening to me? I remembered the first time I had told N we were friends… and the conversation about different types of kisses. I sighed, knowing that this wasn't just a chocolate… this was a kiss, this was N's way of saying he still wanted me to be my friend. He still cared about me…  
And yet, why would be hide it in my bed as if it was my pokemon? I might have wanted to believe it was to mock me, but N wasn't the mocking kind. I examined the kiss, thinking that this was genuine, something that I needed to fully understand and never would.  
I lay under the bed thinking for a long time, turning the silver-wrapped kiss in my fingertips and debating on what to do.  
If you forgive me… please come upstairs…  
Did I forgive N? Was I strong enough to forgive him? Guilt was ebbing at me. If I was strong enough to let go of all the regret I had after Mienshao had died… if I was able to forgive him for that? Then surely I could forgive him for this…  
But then again… this was different. N had hurt me knowingly this time. Mienshao's death had been an accident. My head was spinning in circles as I argued with myself, until suddenly I could hear something aside from just my muffled thoughts. I stopped and opened my eyes—which I had closed unknowingly—and stared at the bottom of my bed.  
N was playing his piano in that perfect way that only he could, calling to me, begging with ever sad note that rang down with the sound of trickling water. I wanted to believe if I just stayed here and ignored it, it would go away… but I knew that was wrong.  
I started crawling out from under the bed with uncertainty. The logical, stubborn side of me was losing the battle against what my heart wanted. I got up slowly, clutching the Hershey kiss with shaky fingers.  
What did he want from me anyways? If he wasn't giving me my pokemon back then what was the point? Our friendship was doomed to end in tragedy without him giving me them back. Because I surely would never forget about my team…  
I sighed, looking at the submarine door. I ran a hand through my damp hair and couldn't stop myself from turning in the direction of the staircase. Before I knew it I was walking with dragging, fearful feet across the room.  
The piano got louder and more demanding as I approached the first stairs and started climbing. Mienshao would want me to be happy… Mienshao would understand the desire to be something more… better than just stubborn.  
But still I wondered if maybe I was just losing my fire. Which brought to my attention… was I ever going to set fire to the rain? Or was rain really going to win this battle.  
I knew with a sinking feeling… that rain was winning right now. Water was putting out the fire. I stared up and held my breath before knocking very faintly on the submarine door. I couldn't see clearly through it, but I knew that the window was open in N's room from the light coming through.  
The piano stopped suddenly and I racked my brain, trying to think of something I could say to him once he answered. I bit my lip and tried to hide the desire to run and hide beneath my bed once more.  
Suddenly the door opened… and N was staring down at me with terrified eyes that reflected my own despair. He blinked once at me.  
"You forgive me?" he whispered, though he really sounded surprised. "I didn't think you would."  
I stared into his emerald eyes without speaking until he stood up and unblocked the entry to his room.  
"I'm not sure yet." I answered honestly, not making any attempt to move.  
He crouched down and held his hand out to me, his fingers shaking ever so slightly. There was a burning in my fingertips… the desire to reach out and take his hand…to let water take me to its lair.  
"I have something that will make you forgive me." He said without looking at me. "Close your eyes."  
"What?"  
"Close your eyes and take my hand… please Touko." He asked, his perfect face showing signs of whitening. His lips were pale and his cheeks lacked color. The most of it came from the purple under his eyes, which proved he had been just as restless as I had been.  
I nodded once and put my hand in his before closing my eyes like he asked. The Hershey kiss felt heavy in my free hand and I knew this had to be a chance worth taking. N was suddenly my world around this place. Not to mention that but I was extremely curious… the way he said he had something that would make me forgive him. As in, he didn't THINK it would work, he knew.  
He led me up the last few steps and helped me to my feet once I was on his floor. I kept my eyes closed like he kept whispering, but I wanted very badly to look at him and see his expression. His voice sounded like it was being strangled, but not in a bad way.  
Ever so gently he put his hands on my shoulders and turned me around. I heard him take a deep breath.  
"Ok…" he whispered in my ear. "Open your eyes."  
I opened my eyes.

My world must have shifted. Everything around me spun; the walls, the floor, and the glorious fountain pouring down the far wall. Everything… just jerked to the left… or to the right I wasn't sure. But it was all I could see before my knees hit the floor and my shaky hand clutched N's for support. He bent at my side, but left the moment to me.  
They all rushed me then.  
I released N's hand and brought it up, seeing through glossy eyes as my pokemon gathered around me. Samorott nearly tackled me, and his snout rubbed against my cheek somewhat roughly. I clutched his thick waterproof fur and sobs started breaking away from my chest. Happy sobs.  
Unfezant impatiently battered Samorott back and demanded my attention. He crooned and ruffled his feathers affectionately against my skin. I held him tightly, knowing that he was probably the most traumatized with everything they had been through. He was a very fearful and skittish pokemon… I was shocked he had lasted as long as he did. It did bother me that he looked a little frail and his feathers looked dirty, but I was too thrilled to really care at the moment.  
I released Unfezant and looked past Samorott to see Reuniclus, her very intelligent eyes choked with emotion. My only girl… since Mienshao had passed. She floated over to me, her sleek body catching the light and looking beautiful. I held my arms out to her and she wrapped me in a hug as if she was a human.  
The three of them embraced me with very little space, the tears falling were breaking through the barrier in my heart, and I was suddenly whole again… well almost.  
"Where—where is Scrafty a—and Eelektross?" I trembled and looked around, trying to find them.  
I spotted Scrafty a little ways off, his head was down but he was looking longingly at me, a terrible pain was in his eyes… and I knew he knew. I forced myself up from the group and walked over to him. He looked at me with begging eyes, wanting me to tell him it wasn't true. I could see he was hoping… that seeing me would prove her death wrong and she would be here.  
I curled my hand around his shoulder and bent on my knees beside him. "I'm—I'm sorry buddy." Tears dripped down my cheeks. "I know you- you loved her…"  
I wrapped him in the tightest hug I could manage, and being the roughest of my pokemon… the one that wasn't in it for hugs or close emotions, I was shocked to find him holding onto me for dear life. His legs were weak, and his hot breath was on my neck, panting, shaking for air.  
He was crying and for the first time I didn't know what to do to help him. Scrafty had always been easy… he was the one that didn't let the world get him down, he was strong and always stood on his own two feet… and now he was broken. He was broken and I couldn't help him. I didn't know what to do…  
"She would want you to be happy." I told him though I wasn't sure it was working. "Mienshao wouldn't want you to be like this."  
Samorott, Unfezant, and Reuniclus gathered around us then. Everyone was trying to comfort Scrafty. It was almost like I could understand what they were saying. It was simple enough.  
We were a family… this wasn't just my team; these weren't just the pokemon that I raised and trained and fought with and for. We were a family and nothing, no distance or time without them could change that.  
I had almost managed to stop crying, but thinking that the only thing that could change that was death… and thinking that Mienshao should be here right now…  
Tears came rushing back out.  
N hung back for a long moment and finally when things seemed to die down enough for him to get a word in he spoke.  
"Touko… I… I have to apologize."  
I looked up at him from over my shoulder, my vision foggy from tears.  
"I let you Eelektross go… He wasn't happy… he didn't want to fight for you, I'm sorry"  
I looked around at my team, wondering if he was telling me the truth for a moment, then knowing without their reassurance that N wouldn't lie to me either way. I sighed and wiped my hand across my face. Scrafty pulled away and mimicked the action, trying to be strong.  
I wished very badly that Eelektross would have had the desire to stay with the group and be my pokemon… but he hadn't yet been attached to us. I hoped that maybe he was happier now. Not all pokemon were meant to be trained anyways.  
I nodded at N and closed my eyes. "It's ok."  
Samorott pushed his face against my shoulder and made a low rumbling noise of affection. Unfezant was standing at my side, as close to me as he could get without being on me, Reuniclus was watching me with beautiful grace, her human-like touch was making me feel more like one of them. We were finally back together.  
I looked up at N, trying to see the emotion on his face, and shocked to find it was more potent than I expected. Something caught between remorse and jealousy flashed in his eyes and he looked utterly miserable. Almost as terrible as he looked that morning I yelled at him and we stopped talking. My heart went out to him and I knew he felt left out.  
It had once been me and him, and no pokemon or team to get in the way of that, the look on his face proved that he was feeling alone again. He turned and looked away, never meeting my eyes.  
"N." I stood and walked over to him. He looked up at me. You would have thought I was saying goodbye forever.  
He didn't answer me as I reached forward and took his hand in mine.  
"Thank you, N." I whispered giving his hand a tug. "Friends?"  
He looked down at me with terribly sad eyes. "You have your team back now… You don't need me to look after you."  
"Your right." I rolled my eyes. "I don't need you to look after me. I've NEVER needed you to look after me."  
"You don't need me…" he echoed softly.  
Whoops.  
I looked back at my confused team. Everyone except Scrafty seemed to be fighting with this, trying to grasp the emotion between us when all they knew was hate for each other. If only they knew what me and N had found in each other since we had been here…  
I pushed N's arms open and fit myself into them, wrapping them tightly around his back and clutching my fingertips into his shoulder blades. He didn't return the embrace at first, just stood rigid. I waited, my heart beating too loudly in my chest and my throat tight with emotion. Who was he to think that I didn't need him?  
"I have been a mess without you." I admitted when he still refused to show me any response. "I hated not being with you…"  
"You're—you're hurting me." He flinched back and I hadn't realized I was clutching his shoulders very tightly now, my fingernails digging in.  
"Sorry." I released him. "I just—  
"It's not your fault." He pulled down on his collar to reveal huge purple bruises along his shoulders, showing me that this wasn't just because I was hugging him so tightly. The wound only made me want to hold him tighter though.  
I pushed my face into his chest and clutched at his shirt instead. "What did he do to you…" my voice was strained.  
"I messed up on paperwork…" N explained. I felt his long fingers brush over the top of my head and his longing eyes peered down at me. "I was so distracted knowing you hated me."  
"I never hated you." I pulled back to look at him. "I was just upset because you took Crypt…" Speaking of which, where was he? I looked around expectantly.  
N shook his head. "You thought I took him because I wanted to liberate, Touko. That wasn't it… I took him from you because I didn't want you to get caught… I don't want you to get hurt."  
"Where is he now?" I asked, scanning the room. He normally came when called, and he was no where.  
"Touko, I'm sorry… his pokeball… it disappeared…"  
I sighed heavily, knowing that this couldn't be as bad as it seemed. I would have liked to tell N that Tate was probably the one behind that, but I couldn't blow his cover either. So I brought down my eyebrows and looked upset.  
"So… he's gone?" and I did think for a minute, of the chance of Crypt actually have disappearing… My stomach did nervous flips at the thought of losing my favorite ghost type.  
"I think he escaped to be honest…" N admitted. "He wasn't in the pokeball anyways, because he always broke out of it on his own."  
"Crypt is smart… and he wont get caught easily." I assured myself. "He will be ok… he will come back to Me." but was that true? I had thought that Eelektross would stay loyal to me as well.  
Samorott strode over with his long, rippling wolf-legs making thuds on the second floor. He pushed his horn between me and N and turned to me, forcing me to back away. His icy eyes were prying.  
"Why are you showing him affection?" N said suddenly.  
"What?"  
"That's what Samorott is saying…" N looked away sadly, his face turning somewhat flushed. "He doesn't like me…"  
"Samorott… N is my friend now." I put my hand on his muscled jaw and looked into his eyes. "Be nice."  
N scuffed his foot on the ground awkwardly. "If you say so." He translated Samorott's rumbling.  
I gave him a pat and then a swift kiss on the nose. "You're a good boy."  
He snorted and nudged me with affection.  
"He wants… he wants to know when you are leaving…" N spoke hesitantly. "They all want to know…"  
And suddenly it hit me… I had my pokemon, plenty strong enough to shatter the glass windows and way more than willing. But was I ready to leave? I looked at N, my mouth open slightly in a silent plea. I could see the creeping purple on his neck and knew that beneath his shirt were many, much worse scars.  
"Touko…" N blinked at me. "Please don't leave…"  
My heart ached in my chest and I felt like I could have died right then and there. He was so innocent and so scared. I could see it in his eyes. And I knew then that I couldn't just leave him… I would never be able to leave him like this. Because no matter how terribly bad I wanted to get out of here, or wanted to stop the liberation, or wanted to see my family and friends again... I just couldn't leave him alone.  
He needed me.


	19. Chapter 19

I thought long and hard about what needed to happen next in this whole situation. It was a long time since I had considered someone other than N and my pokemon and I felt terribly guilty. My heart was wretched in a bad position as I remembered that my pokemon and I weren't the only ones trapped here. Cheren was here too…  
I brought up the nerve the next day while I ran on the treadmill in my room, getting out all of the previous laziness that I had exerted while wallowing. It felt good to run, and not only that, but have my pokemon at my side once again.  
Samorott, too noble to do silly training exercises lay in front of my bed where the sun wasn't reaching through the huge window. It was a hot day, probably the hottest so far, and I was sweating like crazy before no time.  
I had retrieved the weights from the playroom where Zoroark spent most of his leisure and brought them back to my room. Scrafty was reluctant at first, but I knew the desire to work out, something me and him had spent countless hours doing on the journey, would win him over. I even asked N if a punching bag could be hung in this room; he was all too willing and told me it would be up my tomorrow.  
I ran fast, trying to remember all those stressful moments early on my journey when Mienshao and Samorott—Oshawott at the time—had been too weak to battle some of the wild pokemon we encountered. Running away had been a normal thing back then, but it was a quick phase.  
Unfezant was perched over the top of the treadmill, his eyes bright and his feathers already looking better. He still seemed frail, but was getting back to his normal self every moment we were together. Part of me wanted to think that the time apart was good for him. He needed to detach at some point and stand on his own two claws.  
Huffing loudly, swallowing the dryness of my throat, and feeling the sun baking me through the glass window I clicked the arrow button down once. I slowed to an easier pace, a fast jog and looked over at Reuniclus, who was watching me like my life was in danger. She always had that look in her eyes though.  
"Looking good girl!" A boyish voice startled me and I had to yank the cord from the treadmill before I flew off the back of it. I through my arms around the front and Unfezant battered his wings in shock. He flew to Samorott and landed beside him, his head low with fright.  
Gasping I slowed to a stop and stumbled off the side. I walked swiftly, feeling like the ground was still moving beneath me, to the bed where I collapsed.  
"What do you want Kayne?" I said in a strained voice. He came right over to me, waving his hand through the air and scrunching up his nose.  
I scowled. "Did you expect me to smell like flowers after working out?"  
He chuckled. "No. But some air in here would be nice. Don't those windows open?" he pointed with his thumb to the window wall. The harsh sun was beating through and I wanted nothing to do with it.  
"It's so hot out today I wouldn't open the window anyways." I wiped my hand across my forehead and made a repulsed noise.  
Kayne sat down at the other side of the bed and looked around at my pokemon. Scrafty was at my side, looking critically at the strange, icy-eyed boy.  
"These are all yours?" he asked. "Impressive."  
"Thanks." I took a deep breath, feeling my lungs expand and letting it out slowly. My heart rate was high and my legs had the remaining strain of running on them.  
"No ground types?" he observed skeptically. "Or dragon?"  
"No offence, but why are you here? Where is Tate?" I wasn't used to having more than one stalker, this was a surprise.  
"Tate just wanted me to tell you that he has Crypt." Kayne said simply. "And he wouldn't let me go with him on a "mission"." He glared at nothing.  
"Why not?" I sat up and looked at him, wondering what kind of mission Tate could be on now. I wanted to believe he would have told me… but lately I felt like I didn't know Tate as well as I thought I had.  
"Oh he hasn't told you?" Kayne suddenly looked like a sulking kid. I realized with pity that that was exactly what he was. "I'm annoying and get in the way and can't put myself in danger like he does."  
"I'm sure he is just trying to protect you." I wondered if that was true. Tate wasn't much of a care-taker. He was a one hand man; I knew that from the moment I met him.  
"He can't protect me." Kayne snorted. "I'm already dying."  
I looked at him in surprise. Dying? "Wha—what do you mean?" don't tell me Tate wasn't letting his cancerous brother go on mission with him or something?  
And he grinned a sheepish-almost as beautiful as his brothers-smile that made me glower. "Whoops."  
"Kayne, what are you talking about dying!" I demanded, but he was flickering.  
"Gotta go." He winked, just like Tate would have, and was gone.  
"Kayne!" I looked around furiously. He was dying? Then why was he smiling! And what kind of mission was Tate on?  
I flopped back down on the bed in my sweat-drenched clothes and looked up at the ceiling. Something was going on… something was up with Kayne and Tate and I was determined to find it out. If Tate would ever show up to see me I would get some answers out of him…  
I sighed. At least I knew that Tate had found Crypt and rescued him.


	20. Chapter 20

My pokemon were tucked safely away in their pokeballs for the night at the appropriate time. Me and N had agreed that when the sun went down, they would have to be kept in their pokeballs safely in a drawer up in his room. No one dared go through his stuff, and whatever grunts cleaned my room didn't do it during the day unless it was a quick trash take out or vacuuming.  
I never understood why they cleaned during the night, and no matter how many times I woke up in the middle of the night I never saw anyone. I didn't think much of it though; I had just assumed that the grunts were secretly ninjas.  
I wasn't allowed to have my pokemon out of their pokeballs during the breakfast hour, the lunch hour, or the dinner hour when Concordia and Anthea delivered my food. N said it wouldn't be as big a deal if either of them found out I had them, but he didn't want to take any chances.  
So I obeyed without question and had everything put away on time like I had for the past two nights. I was up in N's room, kissing Scrafty's pokeball goodnight when N came in. I blushed, knowing it was silly to kiss them… as if they could feel it.  
N walked across to the bed and pulled his shirt off without hesitation. A wave of heat came over me and I wondered if he had noticed me at all.  
"Rough day?" I cleared my throat, seeing his jerky movements as he pulled off the usual necklace he wore and set in on the bed. He sighed.  
"How bad does it look?"  
I came over to him after placing Scrafty's ball in the drawer and shutting in tight. His back was tattered with the lingering scars from almost two weeks ago, but his shoulder, which had been bugging him more and more, was looking angry and probably infected.  
I lifted my arm to him and touched just under the gash. "N what did Ghetsis hit you with?" I couldn't imagine the Sage doing that with his hands alone.  
"Something sharp… I think it was metal." He admitted.  
"It wasn't rusty was it?" that was the last thing N needed… getting lock jaw. Kings got their shots didn't they? Probably more than the average person did.  
"No." he shook his head. "It probably wouldn't be so bad if it wouldn't stop opening up."  
Look at him… trying to be brave.  
"It usually opens up in the night when in sleeping." He looked at me with his emerald eyes. "I don't really know what to do, its too big for a Band-Aid."  
I examined it carefully. "It doesn't look like it would need stitches." I remembered the one time I had cut my forearm open from falling in the yard as a child. I hadn't needed stitches for that, and it seemed worse than his wound.  
"What about liquid band aid?" I asked, remembering that Professor Juniper had put that on my gash for me. My mother was always faint with blood so growing up Juniper had taken over healing all my cuts and scratches. I was a careful child though, incidents didn't happen all that often with me.  
"Maybe." He ran a hand through his hair and pulled the loose tie out of it. He shook it out and let the long wavy strands hang over his chest. I liked that look on him. Wild… free.  
We walked to N's bathroom quickly and he opened a medicine cabinet over the furthest sink. Inside was every imaginable band aid brand and alcohol wash there was. He dug through the shelves of aspirin and antacid tablets till he revealed the liquid cure. It was the good brand, unlike the one that had sealed me shut so long ago.  
He handed it to me, obviously not sure how to use it. I told N to wash it out the gash while I read the directions, just in case. It was simple enough, and I made N lean against he counter so I could see better.  
"You're like a nurse." He commented as I undid the cap. His eyes where smiling at me. I was so happy our little dispute was over. With Butterfree in my stomach I pulled up the small brush and went to apply a thick layer.  
N screamed, out of no where, shocking me into dropping the brush and backing away. "What?" I demanded.  
He clutched the counter gritting his teeth with pain. I put my hand over his, realizing that liquid band aid on an open wound probably wasn't the best idea.  
"I'm sorry! I'm sorry! I'm sorry!" I saw his eyes loll from the pain and I squeezed his hand tight. Of course he wasn't good with pain… that was just my luck.  
But when he looked down at me with glossy, strained eyes I didn't see faintness, I saw a very faint trace of humor. He blinked once and flinched, looking surprised with the yowl that had escaped his mouth.  
"Its—ok." He swallowed. "I think its working." But he didn't dare look at the wound. It might as well have been sizzling.  
He was such a terrible liar. "You don't have to be brave." I said with a slight scowl. I looked up into the cabinet and found some medical tape, which would be better than torturing him any longer.  
He smiled at me, but his eyes were hesitant as I gently lifted his arm and unwound the roll. I started just under his bicep and worked my way around, never noticing how toned he actually was.  
"Do you—do you work out?" I asked awkwardly, not taking my eyes off my work.  
"Only when I have time in the day. Why?" he flinched twice, but never complained again. After having such terrible pain he must have felt like this was a walk in the park.  
I blushed and didn't answer him. There was a faint tingle in my stomach and I had to force myself not to laugh out loud. Me and N where friends… sure we kissed once, sure I would keep myself here to protect him if possible… but for me to feel even the slightest bit turned on by him…  
He saw my blush. "Tell me." he said as I fastened the sticky side of the tape down and pulled away. It was a neat job to say the least, and didn't look too unprofessional.  
"It's nothing." I waved him off. "Come on, you should go to bed and let that heal."  
He didn't move until I made the mistake of looking in his eyes. "I don't understand." He held his arm out to me, assuming it was this that made me blush.  
I stroked my fingers along a vein in his inner forearm and bit my lip. Had his skin always been this soft and warm? I shook myself internally. Don't be so stupid.  
Ever so slightly he smiled at me and I could see the very small gap between his front teeth. Adorable… my stomach twirled and the only reasonable thing to do was tell him the truth.  
Too bad I wasn't all that reasonable.  
I shook my head, signaling to just forget about it. I changed the subject again. "Why don't you take some aspirin for the pain?"  
He looked over my shoulder to the open medicine cabinet and shrugged. "I think I will be ok. Concordia told me I shouldn't take medicine unless I really need it."  
"She's probably right." I agreed honestly and turned to shut the cabinet. We walked out of the bathroom slowly, him lingering on the counter as I turned and walked to the door. When I glanced back I realized he was still staring at me, his hands curled around the counter and his back showing to the mirror.  
He smiled at me. "I'm so happy you are my friend again." His innocence made my heart flutter. He walked over to me then. His hair was free, his eyes were tender, and ever contour of his long torso looked sleek in the bright bathroom lights.  
I wasn't sure what to say to him, but he stopped and looked down at me, his eyes prying. "Touko, you know… your pokemon… do you know they love you?"  
A sad smile crept over my lips. "We're a family." I thought about Eelektross leaving on his own free will… and Crypt with Tate on his "mission" right now. And I thought about Mienshao… and how much—despite the letting go—I still missed her. We were a family… a somewhat broken one now, with missing pieces, but a family just the same.  
"I thought families where just human beings?" N asked flipping the light switch off. We walked out of the bathroom and into the blue glow of the radio, which was playing very softly to a song I didn't know. It was tender… like N's emerald eyes.  
"Everyone has their own meaning to the word family… I have my blood family, my mother and cousins and the people I'm physically related to." I explained. "But my pokemon family is my team. And I have a family with my friends too…"  
N looked down. "I've never had any type of family." His voice wasn't pitiful, and I knew he wasn't looking for sympathy; it was just his way of putting the words into action. That didn't mean I didn't feel terrible for him.  
"You can be part of my family." I reached for his hands, unthinking all the while, and listening to the soft music. It had meant to sound somewhat joking, in attempts to lighten the air, but it just thickened the emotion. "After all, you are my friend." I added in a second attempt.  
"You are my only family." N whispered, stepping closer to me.  
The two of us somehow, lost in the conversation had accidentally fallen into one another's arms. He had his hands around my waist, and I had mine sitting limp on his chest, since he was a bit tall to just reach up and wrap around his neck.  
We were dancing.  
"I don't think I understand though." N murmured in my ear. "I thought you said pokemon and people couldn't fall in love?"  
My fingertips curled around his neck and I felt myself sliding onto my tip toes with every sway that brought us closer. "I told you there are different kinds of love… The love for my pokemon isn't the same as being IN love with someone."  
"How is there a difference? Isn't it all just love?" he closed his eyes and his cheek rested on the top of my head. His musky, boyish scent filled my nose and I couldn't stop myself from stretching up and sucking in a huge breath of it. My lips hovered over his bare chest, my mouth parted slightly.  
I shook my head. "When you fall in love… its different."  
"How do you know?" the question barely registered in my mind, my lips where inching tours his throat. What was wrong with me? I had never felt this way about Cheren before… he was my friend. Hell, even Tate who was every girls dream couldn't make me feel so… so high.  
Slightly dizzy with the emotion I forced my heels back on the ground and opened my eyes. The blue light danced off of N's skin and he was looking down at me, still waiting for an answer.  
I blinked. "I… I don't know… it's just… when you feel it you will know."  
"Have you felt it?" there was something prying in his eyes, critical.  
I shook my head again. "No…"  
He looked at me like I was crazy, or he didn't believe me, but didn't ask anymore. His face fell, and my heart skipped a beat, making my blood rush to my head and I stopped swaying. I thought he was going to kiss me, I braced for it…  
I realized I WANTED it…  
But he just let his cheek skim mine and whispered in my ear. "What if I already love someone?"  
I knew that I shouldn't jump to conclusion. I KNEW that it wasn't rational to believe he was toying with my heart and making it hard to breathe. I knew that it was stupid to believe we had anything more than friendship with one another… Friendship and one kiss…  
"I—I don't know, N." I looked up at him, my stomach flipping with butterfree. No one could have explained this feeling.  
He didn't speak again, and after an awkward moment of looking at the wall over each others shoulder we came apart, him rubbing the back of his neck and me scuffling my bare feet on his plush carpet.  
"Well I guess I should go to bed…" I mumbled, but my eyes betrayed me. They flickered to his huge bed.  
"Stay." His voice was smooth, too quick to allow me in his bed. His hand twitched tours me and I couldn't even begin to think of a better reason to go downstairs. Sleeping in N's bed with him didn't feel like anything bad, it barely felt like anything at all… except peace.  
I caught myself looking at him too helplessly, too willing to jump into his bed and cuddle up at his side. Nearly two weeks ago I had been holding him, running my eyelashes along his face, kissing his lips… and now it felt like this was the first time in the world I felt this way.  
I could remember as clear as day how our kiss had gone… everything down to the six or so seconds it took to get a response out of him. Yet I couldn't even begin to understand this feeling.  
N had turned away from me and headed for his bed. I watched him remove his shirt from the foot of the bed, and to my surprise, he started unbuttoning his pants. It was a good thing his back was to me too, because he didn't have to see me drool.  
I had never seen so much of him before and it made me want to pinch myself, like I was dreaming. His, dare I say, ass, was perfect under his boxers, and the back of his thighs were toned in just the right way.  
I was wrong. Tate wasn't a model… N was a model. N was a boyish model that posed for boxer commercials. At least… at the moment in my mind he was. I swallowed hard, trying to distract myself with what Bianca would be thinking right now if she was here.  
She wouldn't be thinking though, she would be having an asthma attack because she would be so breathless. Bianca didn't have control of that kind of stuff. Looking at N now though, I felt like maybe I would combust. My skin was on fire.  
Why now? Why all of the sudden was I so attracted to N? I walked to the opposite side of the bed and lay on top of the bedspread. It was far to hot to be under the covers, but nothing would cool me down either way.  
N turned to me then, his arm curling up next to my side and his breath tickling my neck.  
"Touko?" he said my name so softly I wasn't sure I heard right.  
"Hmm?" my bottom lip quivered and something in my mind was screaming "kiss me" over and over again.  
"I think I know how it feels to be in love."  
I looked at him, our noses skimming each other and my toes curling into the sheets. "How do you suppose?"  
He swallowed at me sheepishly, his face turning red even in the dark and his tiny gap between his top teeth making me want to rip my hair out. I couldn't stand that look he gave me. I loved it too much. It was too much of a good thing. He was making me crazy.  
"I think I understand now what love feels like." he repeated. "I think… I think I understand because…"  
I blinked at him, trying to read his mind and make sense of what he was thinking or how he was feeling.  
"I think I love you, Touko." He finally admitted. My heart stopped and picked up again in double time. It galloped in a way I had never felt before. My chest felt too full of air. Before I could even register what he was telling me, or how that was going to effect me I was bringing my hands up to cup his cheek. I sucked in a shaky breath.  
And then I was kissing him.  
Mentally I was gone, lost in the thickness of his lower lip, but physically I could feel everything. I was shaking, my hand curling around the back of his neck and my stomach tingling with fierce determination to get my attention. I ignored it and pulled myself closer to him, my hand getting tangled in his hair and my toes cramping up from their death grip on the sheets.  
Finally, needing air, I pulled back, gasping. It bothered me that he, once again, had barely reacted. It was like he just went stiff and was a statue. I was panting as quietly as I could manage, and he seemed to be unfazed by the whole wild thing. And he thought he loved me?  
I laughed a shaky laugh and rolled away from him to be lying on my back. His hand slid over mine as I moved and I trembled, a smile playing on my numb lips. This was how a first kiss felt? I realized that I hadn't given our real first kiss on the ferriswheel all that much thought.  
This was different, this was my desperate plea of wanting… this was the sudden desire to kiss him more and feel him. I wanted to run my hand along his bare chest, up his neck and across his gentle cheek bones. I closed my eyes and forced myself to stop thinking such nonsense.  
Cheren, Tate, Bianca, my mother, Professor Juniper, all my pokemon… those were the people I should be focused on. I knew rationally that this was exactly what I needed to be thinking about. I forced my thoughts deep down into my chest and back to reality. Back to before I was trapped in this place. Back to before I was friends with N… before I was falling for him.  
The liberation…  
The lies…  
Ghetsis and his evil plans.  
It all came crashing back on me and I through my hands over my face in horror. What was I doing here exactly? Everyone I knew probably spent night after night worried sick about me and I was here…  
Kissing the King…  
"Are… you ok?" N's voice brought me back to the fantasy world I had been living in for the past month.  
I looked at him, my teeth gritted slightly together. I didn't know whether to be upset or thrilled. I was so confused.  
I opened my mouth to tell him I was fine, but no sound came out, instead I was launched upright by a sudden crashing sound. The floor below us trembled and groaned. I gripped the sheets in sudden terror and my heart tried to leap from my chest.  
Familiar alarms… The alarms that went off when Cheren had escaped. My heart wretched, what would I do?  
N sprinted to the submarine door and started climbing down so quickly I was racing just to scramble off the bed after him. He disappeared by the time I was halfway across the room. Suddenly though, something was there in front of me.  
Glistening, rage filled silver eyes.  
"Tate?" I hissed, trying to go around him. There was another crash from below, not as loud, and the sound of the huge door swinging open from my room made me flinch. Ghetsis roaring voice bounced all the way up the stairs to me and I shoved past Tate, forgetting all about him.  
He teleported into my way again and grabbed my shoulders much tighter than he ever would have before. His piercing eyes bored into me and I was frozen, stuck in the icy glare.  
"You don't like him." Tate snarled. "You just think you do because he is the only person you ever see around here."  
I shook him off and yelled over the alarms. "Tate, stop!  
He refused to let me go. "Touko, you don't know him."  
"I do!"  
"No you don't!" he shook me lightly but with firm hands. "You don't know what you are going to get yourself into…"  
His eyes turned sad and the anger in his face faded into something closer to remorse. Everything about his strong personality just seemed to deflate and it made me consider what he was saying. Tate was never one to give up… he was arrogant and annoying and had too much dignity.  
I didn't know why his character meant so much to me but it did. He was different, something about him, like there was something about N, made me wonder if he was human at all.  
Ghetsis's voice below made me come back to the moment. The sirens came back and I shook my head to break the boundary between us. I shoved past Tate again and this time he disappeared for good, only he was replaced by Crypt at my side.  
If I wasn't so terrified for N's sake I would have been thrilled to see my pokemon again.  
"Crypt!" I gasped and stalled for a split second before rushing down the stairs and into my illuminated room. Every light was on and I raced to where N was cowering, his back against the edge of my bed with Ghetsis looming over him, his hand half raised.  
"WHAT HAPPENED?" He demanded, pointing behind him to the huge gaping hole in the wall. The glass window was shattered and the beams holding up that half of the room were creaking with pain. I gasped in shock at the destruction.  
"I… I don't know!" N was shaking. I could see it as I stopped at his side and put myself in between him and the sage. His voice trembled.  
Ghetsis raised his fist to strike.  
"DON'T!" I cried and whirled around to wrap my arms around N, protecting him from the blow. I braced myself and the adrenalin must have been what made this somewhat bearable.  
His fist struck my shoulder blade, not holding back at all until Concordia and Anthea were racing into the room with the other sages fallowing quickly. A numb feeling made me whimper, but I refused to turn around and face him. Moister dewed up in the back of my tank top and I realized that one of the huge rings on his hand had cut me open where the skin was the thinnest over my bone.  
The whole room seemed to flicker, my stomach twisted and my head spun and I clutched N for support, though he could barely hold onto himself.  
An eerie, frightening sound echoed out of the shattered window and the lights started to go out, one by one, dying down into a low glow. I glanced over my shoulder at the familiar thickening of the room and spotted a dark purple and black shadow race forward.  
Crypt bared teeth I had never seen before, hundreds of them, an allusion beyond the depths of his mystery. Ghetsis was taken by surprise, and he backed away from us as the shadowy mass passed right in front of him. He gasped and I stared in shock as it lashed out at him. Ghetsis was jolted backward and I could no longer see Crypt, all I could see was the sage's skin turning a ghostly purple and his eyes growing weak. He convulsed and gripped at it his chest with horror.  
He started choking, unable to get air into his lungs. N and I watched, still clinging to each other as Concordia and Anthea rushed to Ghetsis and started shaking him out of it. I didn't understand why…  
"Sage Ghetsis!" Anthea begged. "Fight it!"  
But Crypt was strong as he took over Ghetsis's body and tightened the walls of his wind pipe together. I wanted to cheer for my pokemon but I was too shocked by the sudden cruelty of his actions. Crypt had always been a tender Mismagius, and now all of the sudden...  
Ghetsis face went blue, and his eyeballs looked ready to pop from his head. N twitched beside me.  
"Crypt enough!" I burst.  
The release was quick and Ghetsis was wheezing with effort as soon as the air had reached his lungs. Crypt's shadowy figure, nothing like how he normally presented himself, appeared at my side. The last pokemon to obey my commands so quickly was Mienshao.  
"You—You wret—wretched—  
"Ghetsis!" Anthea seemed more worried about him than Concorida. She was just staring in shock at the whole thing, her face pale and slick looking.  
The other sages gathered out of no where, rushing to Ghetsis's side and putting their large hands on his shoulders to support him. He tried weakly to push them aside, but his dark, ugly eyes where lolling.  
I watched, trying to figure out what just happened and how fast things had taken a turn for the worst. Ghetsis cast one death glare at me before the dizziness obviously took over.  
He fainted right at our feet, pulling Anthea to her knees with him.  
"Sage!" she cried. "Get a medic!"  
Concordia just stood in fright, her skinny shoulders slumped forward, her eyes distant as she stared down at her controlling sister.  
Suddenly sages were rushing forward to help Ghetsis up. He was out of it, and couldn't stand without support, but the hate in his eyes was clear as day. He looked somewhat drunk, his eyes looked as bloodshot and red as the thing he used to wear over one of them. I could see where blood vessels had popped and I was shocked to find that I was cowering.  
It took all of a second to gather myself and remember the days in which I was stronger than all of these team plasma morons. I straightened and pulled my shoulders back defiantly.  
At my reaction to Ghetsis glaring, two sages grabbed my arms, and another shoved N away.  
"Get the pokemon!" Someone demanded as grunts started hauling ass into the room with pokeballs in their hands, ready to fight if they needed to.  
"Crypt, run!" I started kicking and lashing out, trying to dislodge my arms from the grip the two youngest sages had on me.  
Red beams shot out everywhere and I saw a flurry of Patrat, Woobat, Boldore, and even some Galvantula spring from their trainer's balls.  
"No!" I yelled as the growing mass surrounded my beloved ghost type. "RUN!" why wouldn't he run! He couldn't take them all! "CRYPT!"  
The black mass turned tours me and I could see his normal shape start to take place again.  
"Touko!" N gasped as a grunt came towards me, his eyes looking somewhat guilty already, but he didn't hesitate to pull his hand up. Something silver flashed in the bright, unnatural light and my eyes grew huge as he pressed the metal thing to my side.  
I howled in agony and started thrashing, my legs flailing as the sages lifted me from the ground and dragged me away. I landed one swift kick to the grunts groin before the sizzling pain ebbed away and static bolts zipped across my spin. Tears swelled in my eyes as I looked around for Crypt.  
He was no where to be seen and all the grunt's pokemon were standing dumbfounded by his sudden disappearance. I forced a smug smile on my face. "Good boy, Crypt."  
And I was shocked again. This time I did not scream or kick or try to bite anyone, I just took it with gritted teeth and burning skin.  
"Stop! Now!" N was trying to order the sages, but no one would listen to him. So much for being king.  
"Let her go!" he resorted to begging.  
I watched through fuzzy eyes as Concordia gripped his arm and tried to stop him from fallowing. Ghetsis was being lead out of my destroyed room with his huge arms around the sages that weren't occupied with me.  
The wall spun, so I was confused to see Ghetsis going to opposite direction from me. Saliva was dripping from my mouth and my fingernails felt brittle suddenly from the shock. I was shaking, losing strength quickly, though all my senses, despite sight, seemed to heighten.  
"NO!" N's voice cut through me like a knife as my vision abandoned me and the fuzzy, colorless shapes made less and less sense.  
I could smell blood and feel ever inch of pain as someone forced another lightening bolt inside me. This time the pain was strongest at my thigh and everything below it was growing numb. My head whirled and my breath was ragged.  
N…  
N, I'll protect you…  
But my thoughts couldn't even register before they where gone again. I could hear the crunching of glass from somewhere below me and my fingertips were gone… or… at least I couldn't decide if they were or not. The worse part was knowing that my eyes were open and not being able to see. Blackness engulfed them, yet I could still tell. Was this how it felt to be blind?  
"NO!" N was sobbing…  
I wanted to see him… I wanted to touch his beautiful face and laugh with him and help me. I wanted to kiss him… to be there for him.  
The world seemed to shift and hot night air blew against me. The last thing I could feel was the tight hands gripping me, and even they suddenly disappeared.  
I wanted to love him…  
Wind gushed past my weightless, stunned body. A feeling close to that of getting band aids ripped from your skin hit me and I started throbbing, twisting in air, listening to the lonely echo of my heart. My eyes closed now and I could smell nothing but the forest and the moisture in the air. My eyes flickered once more, in a final attempt to see, and I was surprised to find them working.  
But not nearly as surprised as what I saw through them. Window after window after window passed by like flashes of lightening… but the pain was too much to bear. I closed them again, trying to focus on N and nothing else.  
Somewhere in the back of my mind I could hear Mienshao's dying cry… and N's pleading, and ever rustle of every leave below me. Tears swelled beyond my closed lids and pushed their way out, gliding in tiny droplets into the air. My hair whipped me in the face and I couldn't breath. The world seemed to slow down and everything just vanished…  
It was just me and air and voices in my head as I fell down ninety-eight stories to the forest floor below.


	21. Chapter 21

The sound of light conversation was the first thing I heard. My body felt like it was on fire, and the sound was too faint to make out the voices. I would have used them as closure, I would have convinced myself I wasn't dead, but it was all too muffled to understand. I was forced to believe I splattered like a water droplet hitting the floor in a rainstorm.  
And speaking of rain, it smelt heavily of it. The summer kind of rain, when any cement or asphalt was thick with the smell of wet dirt. I loved that smell; it reminded me of my beginner days as a pokemon trainer.  
I fidgeted, trying my hardest to bring my eyelids up and look around at the new world I belonged to. I never knew if I should believe in Heaven or not, but I couldn't think of anything too terrible I ever did to keep me from going there. So if I awoke to find myself high above the clouds like many believed you would when you died, I knew I would never know what exactly happened back there…  
Someone—no—two of the seven sages had thrown me out the broken window on the ninety eighth floor of the team plasma castle. It was the last thing I could remember.  
They murdered me…  
And for what?  
For defending myself? For trying to protect N from his terrible, disgusting, scourge of a father? Or was it because I was simple who I was? I wasn't sure exactly what they were thinking at the time… all I knew was that it was all over.  
But if this was Heaven—or wherever the afterlife took me—then why was I feeling so miserable?  
Every piece of me felt twisted out of place. My joints were stiff, my sides were heaving and throbbing slightly, and my toes were twitching, trying to cope with the feeling of blood finally filling them. I couldn't open my eyes quite yet, I was trying to pick out the worst part of all this. I decided that if I could pinpoint the hell I might be able to stop it.  
Stop it or dwell on it…  
My heart was slow in my chest, my blood sluggish and it felt like there was something weighing me down on the inside. I realized with a start that it was this part of my that hurt the most…  
If I was dead… I would never see N again. Something like tears tried to push their way out of my eyes but wouldn't break. I managed a shallow, scratching breath and my lips parted in a silent wail.  
He thought he loved me… or… or did he love? Did it matter? I was dead… my hopes of ever being with him or loving him in return were gone. My heart was breaking as I thought of all the possibilities of living with myself now. Heaven or Hell or wherever I was, nothing could make me feel better.  
Not even the smell of the rain. Even that felt like just another way to drown me. I was sinking further into the idea of fire being put out by the rain that I didn't even realize I was starting to be able to hear the muffled voices more clearly.  
"What are you going to do now?" someone with a high pitched voice was saying. I fought with logic, trying to remember who the voice belonged to because I had definitely heard it before.  
"I… I don't think there is much else I can do." Another frantic, but lower voice replied. This one was also familiar.  
"You have to fix her!" the first voice came again, begging this time. I could hear tears in their eyes and I could suddenly feel a warm hand on mine.  
This was much too dreary to be Heaven, and not painful enough—though still very painful—to be Hell. I decided that if I didn't open my eyes soon I never would be able to, and the familiarity was going to drive my crazy.  
So I forced my mind through the depths of blackness and focused on where my face was, and what was happening around me.  
"Can—can someone just… d—die from sho—shock?" a wheezing, pitiful voice seemed to grab me by the arm and yank me past the thick unconsciousness.  
I wasn't dead!  
My eyes flew open then and I gasped as if someone had scared me, as if my heart had been silent for a very long time. Everything was fuzzy for a second and I couldn't understand the spinning walls or the uncomfortable, hard thing beneath me. The warm hand on mine slipped away and found itself again on my face, touching my forehead like it was checking my fever.  
"Bia—Bianca?" I croaked as my vision came back to me and huge gray-blue eyes where blistering with emotion.  
"Touko!" She gasped and I went limp in the embrace of my mother, the first voice I had heard. Tears soaked my throat and I knew that I was home… Somehow, miraculously, I was home…  
Not dead…  
"Oh my baby!" my mother shrieked, crying into my sore and stiff shoulders. Her hands tightened in my hair. Bianca was clutching my wrist, looking down at me as if I was an alien from another planet, or had just been brought back from the dead.  
"We—thought you—you were gone." She spluttered, tears dewing in the corners of her eyes.  
"Deep breaths." I rasped with a very faint smile. It was exactly what I used to tell her when she was having one of her episodes. It seemed like suddenly that month—give or take a week or so—spent with team Plasma was nothing now. It was almost like it had never happened.  
Tears of joy flooded me as lightening flashed in the small window above my head. It was so dark out because of the storm I couldn't be sure if it was nighttime or daytime. I brought my shaky hands up to wrap them around my mothers neck and moaned as I did so. My thigh, ribs, and lower back throbbed with a lingering pain. I didn't have to look to see there would be large bruises from where they had injected me with lightening.  
"Is she awake?" Professor Juniper's voice rung out loud and clear as she ran up my stairs to the second story of my house. She threw herself through my doorway and raced to my bedside. "Oh, Touko!" her eyes were relieved and watery.  
"Go get Tate." My mother finally pulled away from me and brushed my messy hair back around me ear. I could tell it was feeling somewhat greasy from not being washed in some time, which made me wonder how long I had been here.  
And more importantly, how had I survived?  
"Tate?" I looked around, expecting to see a pair of silver eyes boring back at me. Was he still mad? Why was he here? What had he told my family? How did he know…?  
"Touko!" his naturally smooth voice filled the room like music and made me close my eyes. I tried to take a deep breath but my lungs screamed with pain halfway there.  
"Tate?" I turned my head to the left and looked past my mother. He stood mouth slightly open with an expression on his face I had never seen before. It was relief, just like everyone else had, but much more pained. Tate wasn't he kind of person to show emotions like that and it surprised me.  
He squeezed himself between my mother and Bianca at my side and leaned over the bed tours me. I watched the expression fade and turn into a playful smirk. He blinked once. "I thought maybe I wasn't a very good servant."  
I didn't know what he was talking about.  
"You nearly died." He huffed a humorless laugh and then swallowed. "I thought I would lose my job."  
I could tell he was trying to cover up with sarcasm and distaste. He was trying to hide the real feelings in him. His eyes betrayed him though, and I could see the tears trying to swell.  
"Oh, Tate." I whispered and brought my hand up to brush his thick hair back behind his ear.  
He sniffed and wiped his hand across his face. "I'm glad your alive." He muttered.  
"What… what happened?" I looked around at the wondering faces, all waiting for their chance to ask me a million questions. My mother was clutching at he collar of her shirt, still trying to get a grasp on this whole thing. Her makeup was running and her hair was pulled up lazily.  
Professor Juniper looked shaken, like she had never known what sort of emotions could come from almost losing a child. She never had kids so she would never fully understand that… fear, I suppose, but her sensitivity tours others was making her soft. Her lip was quivering.  
Bianca looked so confused even I didn't know what to make of that.  
"Team Plasma…" Tate gritted his teeth together. "A couple Sages decided to throw you out a window…"  
"I know… that's not what I meant. I mean… how am I alive?"  
Tate couldn't force a smile on his face this time. He flinched, though I didn't know why. "I caught you."  
"What?" even I know that was ridicules.  
"Well… me and Gengar caught you." he specified. "I guess you could say we teleported in air with you, and though it didn't break the fall, it slowed you down enough not to get too hurt."  
"I don't feel like I was thrown out a window." I agreed. "I feel like I have been lying in a bed for a week."  
"That's because you have been." Bianca chirped, her pale eyes darting back and fourth between me and Tate. "You've been asleep for a long time."  
I looked at my mother, fighting more tears, and Professor Juniper shaking her head slightly.  
"Touko you went into shock… And then a coma." She whispered.  
My eyebrows came down together and I fought with that. A coma? I didn't want to believe that this was possible. Didn't people get messed up from comas and not remember things, or have brain problems, or other serious problems? I wasn't sure…  
I decided it didn't matter what had happened to me for the past week, I was just happy to be alive. I was happy that Tate saved me life… actually, I was thrilled. And I didn't have brain damage, for the first time in what felt like years, I actually felt normal… back to myself.  
I was free…  
"I thought I had lost you." My mother choked and squeezed my hand tightly. "I was so afraid."  
"I'm sorry mom…" I said, though of course none of this was my fault at all.  
Tate was staring down at me with pleading eyes. I knew he was waiting, waiting for his moment to interrogate me and demand what we do next. The look on his face proved that he hadn't given my friends and family the whole story. I wondered what he did tell them.  
"Touko…" Bianca's small voice brought me away from my thoughts.  
I looked at her, seeing now that despite her relief for me, she was still very troubled.  
"Touko… they still have Cheren, don't they?"  
I didn't have to look at Tate to know the answer. I nodded, guilt clawing at my chest for not having demanded his release while I was there. Maybe N would have given in… maybe Cheren wouldn't be in prison right now…  
N…  
A tremble rolled up my spine as I tried to imagine what happened after I was thrown out that window. N had been so afraid… he had tried to stop them from hurting me. Did I know I was alive? Did he still have my pokemon? Did he protect Crypt? I felt sick with all the questions.  
"And Touko…" Bianca's eyes narrowed with remorse. "They took my pokemon from me."  
"What?" Professor Juniper turned to her in shock. "When!"  
"A long time ago… right after the big battle." She looked ready to cry. "Touko I thought maybe they were with you… wherever you were, but they weren't, were they?"  
I wished I could lie to her and tell her that they were back at the team Plasma castle… but I had never seen them and I doubted anyone would have kept them.  
I shook my head and watched the tears roll from her eyes. Professor Juniper put her hand on her shoulder and squeezed gently, trying to comfort her in any way possible as she entered a flurry of gasps.  
I felt like I had the world sitting on my shoulders and everything that was happening and had already happened was my fault. Cheren being in prison, Bianca losing her pokemon, all the sorrow and pain and Tate's secret sorrow, it all seemed to be crushing me.  
If a panic attack and a coma couldn't kill me then surely this would.  
Unable to lie any longer I gathered my strength and sat up. My mother wanted me to stay put but I insisted that I had to stretch. I looked out the gloomy, rain covered window of my familiar room and felt a lump rise in my throat.  
Where was N right now? Was he ok?  
"Oh." Tate seemed to remember something then. He reached for his pocket and pulled out a familiar pokeball.  
My mother looked repulsed as he handed it to me.  
"You saved Crypt?" I took it quickly and dropped it on the old wooden floor. It erupted and gathered in a mass in front of me. I held my hand out to him and my favorite ghost type pokemon raced into my arms, feeling more solid that he ever had before. He made that strange purring noise he always did and I felt slightly more at ease.  
My mother on the other hand…  
"No!" she curled her hands up into fists. "No more pokemon!"  
"Cheryl." Professor Juniper cautioned, reaching for my mothers hand.  
"No!" she repeated desperately. "Team Plasma has already ruined so much I won't let them have a reason to come here again!"  
"They never came here." I said softly. "Mom… you're just going to give them what they want?"  
"Touko, I will NOT take the chance of losing you again over a pokemon."  
"Crypt isn't just a pokemon!" I couldn't believe my ears! My mother, who had been a trainer once herself, who had a pokemon of her own at one point, was all of sudden going to let team Plasma win?  
"He is part of my team…"  
"Your Mienshao died, Touko!" My mother was fighting her own fears and beliefs. "You are going to risk another pokemons life?"  
I glared, suddenly furious with her cheap shot. I knew she just wanted to protect me, but she had to realize I wasn't just going to give up everyone I believed in because I was back in her house and back from a coma. Pokemon or not I knew what I had to do.  
"You can't take her pokemon from her." Tate said smoothly, only it sounded like a challenge in my mothers ears.  
"Stay out of this." she didn't look at him, but waited for my response.  
"Mom… I know this isn't what you want to here, but…" I swallowed hard, thinking of N and the promise I made him.  
More importantly than getting my pokemon back, or getting Cheren out, or stopping the liberation altogether… I had to keep that promise to N. He loved me… He was the only person that had loved me in that dreadful place. He had made it bearable and tried to protect me and make me happy even when our ideals where different. He made me sane.  
I promised him I would protect him and I was determined to keep that promise.  
All the eyes in the room were turned to me, even Crypt's which were filled with fear of having to leave me, were waiting for what I had to say. Tate looked hopeful, Bianca looked pleading, my mother looked absolutely terrified, and Professor Juniper looked like she was going to side with me no matter what. I took a deep breath and spoke with more authority than I expected.  
"I have to go back."


	22. Chapter 22

~N~

"GET OUT!" Even I had never heard my voice so violent before.  
The two grunts that had been picked by default to come "check on me" vanished instantly, back down into the construction of Touko's old room below me. I listened to the lonely sound of drills and hammers until the door leading down was closed and soundproofed the room. I lay in the dark then, listening to the radio, clutching the remote and knowing my heart would never be the same.  
Zoroark was curled up at my feet, sleeping now, but trying to protect me from myself. My hands where numb, my feet too, actually… everything felt numb. I breathed in a desperate breath, trying to get the last smell of Touko off of her Litwick stuffed pokemon that was tucked under my cheek.  
I remembered the day I had won her it at the amusement park, being nothing but N and Touko, not king and prisoner. I had realized that day that I loved her. Somewhere inside of me, something had changed. It felt like the world was turning in one direction, and then everything stopped, changed direction completely, and was whirling the other way twice as fast.  
She had kissed me on that ferriswheel in cart number six with the sun setting out the window and my shoulder hurting from when someone had run into me. I had felt so stupid for not knowing what to do, and then dreadfully happy when she didn't seem to mind. My throat had grown tight, and my stomach had been battered with butterfree, causing that thing to grow, despite my best efforts. I didn't think she noticed, but I still couldn't be sure, she had been very close to me after all.  
Suddenly something caught my attention on the radio, and I pulled my hand up weakly to turn it slightly louder.  
There's a side to you that I never knew. All the things you say, they were never true, and the games you played you would always win.  
My eyes grew heavy with remorse as I listened to Adele sing Set fire to the rain. Touko had told me once that she wasn't as good as the original singer, but I didn't believe it now. Touko had desperation in her voice that made it astounding. Even singing happy songs, there was something that made me wonder if she had a deeper meaning beneath the words.  
Adele was good, passionate and strong, but Touko was real; she was firm.  
Tears poured from my eyes as I fought with the truth once again.  
Was this how Touko felt when her dear Mienshao had died? Like she was drowning upside down and never finding the surface? Never seeing the sun again… never feeling whole? I could remember how violently she had acted the night her beloved pokemon had died… and it explained the way I was acting now.  
No one had gotten near me in the past week since… what happened. The only person that had even gotten remotely close was Concordia, and that was only because she seemed to miss Touko as well.  
Though "miss" wasn't the right word… no, I NEEDED Touko. I was destroying myself over her. Every guilty and wretched vein in my body was aching, losing the battle with who I am. Seconds turned into minutes, and minutes turned into hours, and hours turned into days that never ended. The sun had not risen, the moon had not changed, and the stars didn't shine anymore. I was gone; as lonely as a ghost pokemon, always wondering… always trying to remember what there life was before they died. Ghost pokemon were not born… they were killed.  
Was that what I was? Was I a ghost pokemon now? Was Touko?  
Tears soaked my face as I thought about how completely horrible these people were to me. How horrible these people were in general. The grunts… most of them… the Sages…  
Yes the Sages… they're evil. I was convinced that none of them have hearts, or even anything remotely close to a heart. They were cold… selfish, scourges. And they would keep going with or without me…  
I wasn't a King, I was a puppet.  
Touko told me to stand up for myself, she told me to be brave and not to give into them. She made it perfectly clear when she thought differently than the way I thought, though our ideals were different, she knew we could be something. I wasn't sure how she could have foreseen that, but I knew she was right. She and I… people and pokemon… water and fire… we could survive together. She proved that to me.  
I whimpered, without her the world would never understand. The Sages... my own father would never truly be defeated. It was a terrible fate for Unova.  
Touko was dead…

~Touko~

I was somewhat repulsed with my mother, no matter how happy I was to see her after being gone and thought to be dead for so long. Turns out, no one knew where I was that month I spent in the Team Plasma Castle with N. But Tate had gone and blabbed his big mouth. Now my mother really didn't want me leaving.  
I knew Tate had only done that to me because he didn't want me going back there himself, but it was selfishness on his part. He didn't even have the excuse of wanting to protect me, he just simply said that he didn't want me seeing N anymore. And thus, I wasn't speaking to him.  
He and my mother all of sudden were best friends, she fancied him over anyone else, even Bianca who had grown up as a sister to me. My mother would have chained me to my bed if she could have, and that was really saying something. She had always told me to do the right thing and to stand up for what I believe in. She had once been an encouraging force behind me, driving me forward, now she was a leash holding me back.  
My mother seemed to be taking this whole thing too seriously. So what if I was thrown out a window? So what if I went into a short coma? No one would ever understand that this wasn't important… No one would ever understand how it felt to have the world sitting on your shoulders.  
Even Bianca, who was determined to rescue Cheren and help me any way she could, wasn't on the same page as me. In her eyes this wasn't realistic; this was a chance to prove herself worthy of a fairy-tail world that she wanted to live in. One where her asthma was gone and her pokemon had never been taken from her.  
I was thankful for her support despite the hassle it would be when I went alone and left her behind. She would give me her life story for the hundredth time and make me feel guilty about how everyone makes her stay behind and never gives her a chance. She would use her asthma as the excuse and try and convince herself that it wasn't personal and that I really just wanted to protect her. But she would never say it out loud. Bianca was smart and wanted to be courageous, but unfortunately she got the short end of the stick when it came to strength. Her heart was just too soft for the world I was living in.  
Professor Juniper was my biggest ally against my mother, saying that this needed to be stopped before it got any worse. Her pokemon assistants had been stolen from her and I knew how much they had meant to her. She couldn't have kids, so she didn't have a husband, which made her only real options for company pokemon and neighbors. She had lost her pokemon already, and now she and my mother were fighting over me.  
I found it hard to believe anything could get much worse around here. I almost laughed when I wondered if it was easier to live at the Plasma Castle. Of course it was easier, no one had to suffer or be afraid because of my choices.  
I sighed and put my chin on my knees. I was sitting on my porch, letting the sun bake the top of my head and my shoulders. It felt good to get some sun, but nothing could have changed the overall hell going on around me. Once upon a time I was sitting on this porch with the hose in my hands, spraying my Samorott—Oshawott at the time- to keep him cool, Mienshao would have been at my side chewing on a ripe berry.  
Those days of simplicity were over. It was just me and Crypt now. I sighed, he didn't eat berries, and water went right through him. Crypt was my favorite ghost type to say the least. I loved him for what he was; a ghost, something that was always there whether I could see him or not. But he wasn't warm or huggable, he didn't eat or sleep or even have blood running through his body.  
Crypt would always have a place in my heart, but I was missing the rest of my team—especially Mienshao—very much.  
The hot air stirred around me and made the dark green-leaved trees rustle. The sky was a cloudless blue, and the white wood of my house looked like it was glowing. This was a relatively old-fashioned town, if considered a town at all. The fanciest place here was Professor Juniper's lab, which it was barely up to standards. Any less attractive and they would shut her down. I wondered why looks always seem to mean more to people than the quality.  
Like N and Tate…  
I buried my face in my legs and stifled a moan, pushing the thoughts out of my head. How would I ever get to see him again? I didn't even know where the team Plasma Castle was, and Tate sure wasn't going to take me.  
Suddenly something hit me, making a whole new outlet open up in my brain. I lifted my head and stared in awe with new hope. Kayne!  
Kayne could take me… he knew the castle as well as Tate did, maybe even better, and he didn't have any selfish reason to keep me here. Hell, he might be all for the idea. The only thing that might stand in the way was the fact that he could still be loyal to Plasma, and then he wouldn't want me stopping them.  
I would have to lie to him… I would have to tell him I just wanted to get Cheren out of there and get my pokemon. He would understand that wouldn't he? Besides… that would be the same lie I had been telling everyone anyways.  
Free Cheren; yes I would do that. Get my pokemon back; yes I would do that too. But what no one knew was that I wouldn't be coming back until I had N wrapped around my finger.  
We had spent a month together and never once had we really talked about our ideals. We never took the time to dig up the problem that got me put their in the first place. And regardless of what anyone said or did, I was still the girl who defeated team Plasma.  
They all were afraid of me, and if they thought I was dead… no one would be prepared for my return. If I could get N alone and make him realize… make him understand that liberation was wrong and that he could have a better life free of Team Plasma and the Sages… he would have to come with me.  
If N really loved me he would come around. Who knows, maybe he was already coming around? After all… he had given me my pokemon back while I was their. Speaking of which…  
Had he released them?  
My heart lurched with fear. If N thought I was dead then he might have been tempted to release my pokemon into the wild. I wasn't sure where the castle was, or if it was even remotely close to my home town. What if my pokemon couldn't make it back to me?  
And what if N knew I was alive? The chances were slim, I knew that, but if he knew somehow that I hadn't hit the ground when I was thrown out the window… maybe he was looking for me?  
I looked up at the sky, trying to understand all the possibilities and what I would do with them. Crypt was flitting around in my yard, weaving around the flower bed up against our porch and making little waves of water on the bird bath by the window. I never knew ghost pokemon could enjoy the sunshine, but apparently he did.  
My front door swung open behind me and I turned to see Tate coming towards me. He sat on the step just below mine, not speaking until he was situated with his silver eyes catching the sun and making me squint.  
"For someone who almost died and is now free of prison you sure aren't very happy." He commented.  
I ignored him. He knew exactly why I wasn't happy. I had every right to be.  
"Touko you can't ignore me forever." he rolled his eyes. "You are just too nice for that."  
"You would be surprised." I muttered.  
"Look, see? You're already talking to me again." He joked lightly. I knew that this was all just a façade. He was really going crazy inside without me talking to him.  
He stared around the quiet little town and then glanced back at me. "Touko, you do realize that… its not that I don't want to save Cheren, it's that I don't want YOU saving him right?"  
"You just don't want me going back to N." I couldn't look him in the eyes. "You really don't care about Cheren either way."  
"I will go risk my life and set him free rig—  
"Tate you don't get it do you!" I stopped him mid sentence and glared. "I have to go back…"  
"No you don't."  
"At some point… Whether it is to see N or not I have to."  
"Why?"  
"Because I'm the only one that can stop this… My mother lost her Lilipup, Bianca lost her team, and Professor Juniper lost her assistants. I can't just let this go. How many other trainers do you think lost their pokemon to Plasma?"  
"It doesn't concern you. Just because you beat him once… just because—  
"It does!" I was yelling now. "The region thinks I'm dead… that brave trainer you heard about in the newspapers for the past month, the girl that Zekrom accepted… that's me, Tate."  
"It could have been anyone."  
"But it wasn't anyone, it was ME."  
"Things change!" he insisted. "I'm not the same person I used to be. Ill be damned if I am! I think you just want to get the king.-He spat the word.-wrapped around your little finger."  
"And why shouldn't I?" I challenged. "Why shouldn't I try and get him wrapped around my finger if it will prevent more of this?"  
"Because that's not the real reason is it?" his white teeth were clenched tight, his silver eyes cold. "You mean to tell me all this affection is part of your master plan to stop things peacefully?"  
I didn't know what to say… Tate was right. I didn't want to wrap N around my finger just because I wanted all this to stop. It was a big part of it sure, but whether I knew I could stop this or not I would still be going back to see N. I couldn't leave him thinking I was dead, he didn't deserve that. He loved me…  
Well… he thought he loved me. Who knows if N's emotions were real or not. He was so innocent he might just think he loves me. How did he even know what love is anyways?  
I was forced to reason with the chance that he already had forgotten about me and was moving on with his daily life. The mornings he would spend patrolling, by noon he would be on the phone with people and that would last to at least two or so. He would sign things, talk to companies, order around patrols for certain cities, then finally by sunset he would make his way back to his room.  
I wondered if he had moved back into his real room at the very top of the castle instead of staying in the one above my old room. Had they fixed the window in my room?  
I looked at Tate, who was smug as can be, knowing that my silence had confirmed his thoughts. He had been there when the window broke.  
"Tate…"  
He turned to look up at me, his face gentle now, angle-like and his silver eyes clear.  
"Do… do you know how the window broke that day?"  
Something flickered in his eyes, but whatever it was he pushed it away so quickly I couldn't be sure I didn't imagine it. He turned his eyes away from me and looked towards Crypt wandering around a tree by the side of my house.  
"No." he said smoothly.  
"So you just happened to be there?"  
He nodded. "I do have great timing."  
I wasn't buying it. "Tate…"  
His eyes were darker when he looked at me, cautious. "Yes?"  
"You aren't lying to me, are you?"  
He smiled a wicked smile and a shiver rolled up my spine. His face was eerie, ghost like even in the sun.  
"I saved your life Touko. Why would I lie to you?"


	23. Chapter 23

I stood very close to Kayne, my shoulder pressed up against his and my arm twined with his. He gave me a quick nod and mouth "one… two… three." To warm me.  
He told me that if this teleport was going to work right I would have to hold my breath and hold on tight. He said it would be over really quick, but he never mentioned that preparation could take some time. Tate seemed to be able to teleport whenever he wanted with a blink of an eye; I guess I expected the same from Kayne.  
It was the night after we had talked. He told me to stay up and wait for him around one in the morning and to be packed for however long I wanted to stay. He gave me a cell phone and a number to call whenever I wanted to be picked up. He told me that it might take a day or so for him to reach me, but I was ok with that.  
Apparently he being in this region would be too "close" to Tate and the chances of him finding out what was going on would be too good. I hadn't realized that them being who they were, the former Shadow Triad, they had connections whether they appreciated it or not. As soon as Tate was suspicious of Kayne he would pinpoint him and demand answers.  
But that only worked for so much time and space. Kayne told me that their oldest brother, Bobby, was in another region because he didn't want Tate interfering. I could tell the subject was touchy though, so I didn't pry for many details. All I knew was that I was going back  
I gripped Kayne's arm tighter and he flashed me a friendly smile before he closed his eyes and held his breath. It must be harder for him to teleport with me rather than just on his own. The preparation was killing me.  
I squeezed my eyes shut tight and suddenly it felt as thought he ground disappeared beneath me. I was falling… falling fast. My arm was gripping his so tightly I was losing the blood flow to my hand, and my free hand was curled up into a fist. A sensation of weightlessness came over me and I couldn't even tell that I was wearing clothing.  
Everything except for me and Kayne at my side was gone. The backpack full of clothes, the pony tail holding my hair back, even the clear fingernail polish I had on seemed to fade away. Kayne was a brick wall beside me, not breathing or moving, no indication that he hadn't died and trapped me in this world of wind and fear forever. I ground my teeth together and pushed down the desire to take in a jagged breath.  
My lungs were burning by the time it all just came back. Everything hit me hard suddenly again, and I realized that Kayne was gone. I hit the wall with a thud and slid to the marble floor groaning. My eyelids wouldn't open for a second, so I wasn't sure which room I was in, but the silence told me I was alone.  
I wasn't sure where Kayne had gone so fast, but I wasn't too concerned. I had the cell phone, I had the charger, I was good.  
My eyes fluttered open to the moonlit room. Everything was perfectly arranged, just like I remembered it. Giant royal blue bed with a golden frame, huge window covering most of the far wall, cold floors and large plush rug a little ways off… even the treadmill was still in place where I left it.  
I looked over, my heart rapid in my chest, to the beautiful spiral staircase that went up to the submarine door. Was N in that room now? Or had he gone back to his real bedroom? I didn't want to say my chances were bad, but I knew with two weeks of time he could have very easily left.  
Shakily I got to my feet and walked over to the huge royal blue bed and set my backpack on the foot of it. My bed…  
My nerves were on end as I walked over to the staircase, every little sound my tip toes made on the floor sounded like an earthquake, and I wished for a second that I wasn't alone. Kayne could have waited a moment or two just to make sure I didn't have a panic attack. That's all I needed… to go into another coma.  
I forced myself to walk swiftly up the spiral staircase, and I found myself crossing my fingers as I went. My head reached the submarine door and I tried to remember the last time I had gone through it. My heart was racing, pumping in my ears and I pressed my hand on it and tried to push up.  
It was locked.  
I bit my lip, not sure what else to do. Kayne should have dropped me off in his room rather than in mine. I bit my lips and squeezed my eyes shut, trying to figure out why I should be nervous while I rapped lightly on the door. The knock sounded very loud and made me flinch every time.  
I kept repeating "N loves me" in my head as I waited for a reply that wouldn't come. Sure I could have knocked again, but despite the hour of the night I had the feeling he was ignoring it.  
"N…" I whispered softly before realizing he wouldn't hear me. I sucked in a deep breath and opened my mouth louder.  
"N." Still… the volume wouldn't come.  
"N!" I squeaked and set my hand to knock again.  
Was he deaf? Blood pumped through my neck hotly and made me feel somewhat faint. I didn't hold back this time when I knocked and called his name. The room above was soundproof… but not… THAT soundproof. I was trying to remember the way that crash had sounded to me when Garchomp broke the window. It had gotten N out of bed so fast.  
But still… there was no response to my knocking. Maybe he really had moved back to his real room… I wanted to believe I hadn't gotten my hopes up, because now I would have to go out into the hall and find a grunt. But then what?  
The sages killed me… Or so they thought. What if they tried again? I shivered; what if they stuck those lightening rod things on me again? The memory of pain flooded me and I sighed, now feeling desperate.  
After too long of waiting for no answer I began treading down the stairs again. I stopped at the bottom step and sat, thinking about what to do. Tell a grunt and take a chance? Or call Kayne back and pray he knew where N's real room was. Surely he wasn't out of the region just yet?  
It would be a terribly painful conversation on the phone with him, but I knew it was the only real option I had after I stopped to think about it. With a heavy heart I got up and left the staircase. I moved slowly to the end of the bed and reached for my backpack when suddenly something flickered on behind me.  
I whirled; my heart hammering as the room from above was lit up, sending a spotlight down onto the stairs. I swallowed hard and waited, holding my breath, wishing that damn submarine door would open.  
A shadow crossed over it first, hesitant, then I watched as the shadow blocked out all the space for the light to shine. I took a slow step forward, thanking what little luck I had left.  
The door slipped open and I could see a dark figure peering down into my room. I opened my mouth, not wanting to frighten him, but not wanting him to leave either.  
"…N…" I forced myself to whisper.  
His figure suddenly grew stiff, and I couldn't yet make out his face.  
"I—I'm ali—alive." I choked, not noticing the lump pushing its way up in my throat. I watched as the figure slid his legs over the entrance and touched down on a step. He looked somewhat like a descending angel, coming down from heaven with the golden light of the room above shining down on him. I could see the green of his long hair, the broadness of his shoulders and the narrow part of his waist, and the ever so slight arch of his neck. His features seemed to fade into the dark world below me and I trembled.  
"Touko…" his voice was steady, too steady, and much more than beautiful. Had I never noticed before just how perfect he was?  
Tears started to pour from my eyes unexpectedly, but I couldn't move, not even to wipe them away. I felt like I was bolted to the ground as he took that last step down and stared across the room at me.  
"Is… that really you?" now I could see it... the emotion and fear in his eyes. It was building into something I couldn't understand. Excitement? Sadness? Splendor and glory? It was some bittersweet cross over between all of those things that made water spring from his eyes.  
We stared at each other, lost in what we didn't understand and what he had misunderstood. Finally he seemed to understand, and his reaction proved it.  
"You're alive." He whispered to himself, his eyes widening in the dark. He took a step forward. "Touko!" he shouted, making me jump. "You're alive!"  
And then he was racing across the room to me. I trembled as he came forward, his hands skimming my face light as feathers and his eyes looking absolutely astonished. I stared back at him, trying to understand the sudden emotion pushing up from my chest. My hands curled around his waist gently and then slid around to the small of his back. I pushed my face forward and pressed it into his chest, the tears turning into waterfalls.  
"H- how?" N sounded somewhat strangled. His face buried into my hair and I could feel him breathing heavily, along with the confusion. His wet eyelashes skimmed the side of my face and I felt like a piece of my heart was being put back together.  
Ever since I had left N I hadn't been quite so complete. I had been missing something… I had been lost in a sense. I was shocked at how fast the feeling of longing was gone, and how fast it was replaced with something stronger. Everything that had felt mildly numb for the last two weeks felt full again… luscious and pumping with hot blood. Even my fingertips seemed to feel the change.  
I couldn't bring myself to even comprehend the question he asked me, and I felt too disgruntled to commit to answering him. This was all that mattered suddenly. Not my mother or Bianca or Professor Juniper or even Cheren. For one long, bittersweet moment it was just me and him. The only thing that seemed to stop was the faint sound of Mienshao in the back of my mind.  
I blinked rapidly and took in a shaky breath, misunderstanding the voice in my head. I wasn't sure how or why but I knew that she was here with me… somewhere hidden in a second world. If the afterlife was real I knew it had something to do with the world she belonged in. The one in my head that made me feel so miserable when I was alone and so unbelievably happy when N was with me.  
She was here…  
For the first time since she died I felt like I had my pokemon back. My faithful companion… my first team member and my best friend. I had put so much effort into ignoring her memory and forgetting about her death that it hit me like a brick wall. I had been hiding from HER…  
I could even smell her fur around me as I clutched at N's back and sobbed, trying to grasp the depths of sanity as they pushed the boundaries of my mind.  
"I missed you." I whimpered, not sure if I was talking to N or Mienshao. "I missed you so much."  
N rubbed his hands along my shoulder blades and set his cheek against my head. He sniffed once and had to breathe before speaking.  
"I—I th—thought you we—were gone."  
I shook my head. "No... No, N I was… ta-taken away from here…"  
He held me tighter, so recklessly close I could barely control the urge to go limp and just melt into his arms. He brushed my bangs back and set his cheek against mine. His eyelashes swiped up and down twice in a poor attempt to give me a kiss.  
It was just so… so silly.  
A shaky laugh escaped my lips and I couldn't believe that of all things a butterfree kiss was what made me laugh. All the emotion and sorrow and sweet relief just flew away from me and I found his innocent ways just too perfect.  
Naturally, as if second nature to me, I leaned up and let my wet lashes flutter against his brow. He dipped his head to me as my lips skimmed across his jaw and a salty tear covered them.  
"I—I love you, Tou—Touko." He spluttered like a child. My heart was mending itself back together in my chest and making my lungs feel sore. I planted a kiss on his cheek and held him very close to me.  
Never would I have thought this reunion could be so sweet. I wondered now what I had been so nervous about. All I knew was that I was here… and we were together.  
Mienshao's voice echoed beyond my thoughts and made me shiver.  
"I love you too, N…" I whispered.


	24. Chapter 24

The sun seemed to never rise the next day, despite the lightening of the sky. It was still cloudy and very dank outside. I was listening to the trees, trying to find comfort in the gently scratching sound of bare branches on each other. Whimsicott was looking better, and N was more or less happy to be alive.

He had left for a while in search or oran berries, which I told him wouldn't be growing this time of year, but he insisted anyways. So I was especially surprised when he came back, his jacket slung over his arm and a whole bunch of them wrapped carefully inside. Whimsicott sat up a little straighter, looking happy to see the food.

"They really aren't that great…" he came over to us and unfolded the jacket. Most of the little blue berries where wrinkled and some had marks where a bird had pecked at them, but they were ok.

"No this is more than I expected." I picked one up and popped it in my mouth. "Where did you find them?"

N shrugged. "It's easy when pokemon are willing to help…" he smiled. "In other words, a little Pidove in a tree told me."

I laughed a nervous laugh and swallowed the somewhat bitter thing. "I was thinking… if I can find Bianca and Cheren… they could help us N."

He seemed to frown. "How?"

"Well… Bianca has connections with Elisa and… being that I am sorta the champion of Unova… I think I could get a hold of the Gym leaders… some of them might be a little weary but I know they would help. The former Champion, Alder, he would vouch for me."

"But what good will that do anyways? It's not like you are being hunted down, it's me." He raised a hand and set it on Whimsicott's head. He was too busy stuffing his face to notice.

"But with their help we can prove you innocent. It's the law N."

"Since when has team Plasma ever cared about the law?" he grumbled to himself. I sighed.

"I don't suppose you have a better idea?"

"I could… well…"

"What?"

"I could go back and…"

"NO!" I grabbed his hand as it reached for another berry. "You can't go back!"

"I know there are people that would follow me Touko." He tried to explain. "They would side with me… because they never wanted to put up with all that was happening before anyways. A lot of the Grunts only worked for me and team plasma so they could feed their families."

"So you want to just prance back in there and ask who wants to join you in going against your own father. Their leader?"

"I could make it seem like I really was coming back to do my job…" he looked away. "I could make them believe that I want to be king again; they know with my ability to talk with pokemon I can do it. They would have to let me have another chance…"

I shook my head. "It's too risky. What about that photographer, she saw what happened… she would… she would ruin it anyways!" I hadn't the heart to tell him that I was really just too afraid of being away from him.

"Touko…"

"Please…" I bit my lip. The worst part was that his plan was better than mine and I knew destroying team Plasma from the inside out was the way to do it…

N looked down, not sure what to say. Finally be mumbled. "I probably wouldn't be able to pull it off anyways… I would miss you too much."

I smiled and laughed shakily. "You are a pretty terrible liar." Relief washed over me.

"There is a problem with your plan though." N went on. "You don't have any of your other pokemon and… something tells me you will need them if you are going up against team plasma… again."

I cursed under my breath. "Maybe I can sneak into my house and-"

"No." N cut me off.

"What?"

"You need to clear things up with you mother." He looked terrified, not having much experience with a child to parent relationship. But he was right. "You are going to need all the help you can get right?"

I nodded with a sigh.

"It's not that bad." He gave me a gently nudge. "I would do it for you if I could."

"I know I know… parents can be so difficult sometimes though…"

N laughed, startling me. "Hey, your mom might be a little secretive and over-protective, but I would take her over my father any day."

I rolled me eyes. "I guess I should feel pretty lucky to have the mom that I do…" I murmured, the humor leaving my face in a frown. "I will clear things up with her… She is my mom after all, I love her."

N smiled at me.

"But if you think I am going to forgive and forget about that wretched man that thinks he is my father—

"No one said anything about that…" N muttered. "But if it is really a problem we could always trade fathers."

I looked at him, raising an eyebrow. "You need to stop doing that you know…"

"What?"

"Being so smart all the time." I said simply, ignoring the fact that he was so clearly saying my father was better than his. I didn't doubt that either.

He smiled at me, his emerald eyes dancing. How could the two of us be so happy together in a time of crisis? I knew the only answer was the fact that we were just so in love with each other.

"So off to your mother's then?" N asked after a long moment of listening to the sound of the squishy berries in Whimsicott's mouth.

I nodded and sighed again. "Right…"

….

I took a deep breath as I approached the front door of my home… the place I knew like the back of my hand. Every crevice or scratch in the old house was familiar. I could count ever window and tell you exactly which ones opened and which ones would get stuck about halfway through. But what wasn't familiar to me… was the way I felt. Like I didn't quite belong here…

We had abandoned the truck in the forest, knowing that brining back would do nothing but cause more problems. So N stood back, on the dirt road that leads down the center of town. He was watching me, blinking and nodding with encouragement.

I stalled for a long moment, trying to figure out what exactly to say… the only thing that would be prudent enough was "I'm sorry" though… I knew I had to admit defeat.

My shaky hand rapped on the door quietly.

There was a long silence before the door opened and my mother through herself around me, her arms stretched across my body and she was shaking, babbling through her teeth, trying to understand that every part of me was ok. I tried to ignore the fact that this was her fault to begin with… She had been in on it… the whole thing with the Liza.

But I couldn't be angry, or even somewhat upset, I was just too happy to know that my mother still loved me. Teas swelled in my eyes and she started to rock back and forth, hugging me tighter and tighter.

"M- mom. I'm s-so sorry." I started to sob. "I shouldn't have l-left."

"I'm sorry." My mother whispered. "I just… I wanted you to be safe and I know the way I was going about it… was wrong"

One of the best things about my mom was she always knew when she was wrong. In this case though, I didn't quite understand her reasoning.

"I know now… you're not going to leave N are you? No chance in you just forgetting about him and being safe at home with me and your pokemon?" she said looking me in the eyes with her identical ones. I saw my bedraggled reflection there and slowly shook my head.

She sighed, but understood. THIS was the woman I had come to know as my mom, not someone who sneaks out in the middle of the night to go see my runaway father.

"What am I gonna do with you?" she brushed my hair back and wiped away a tear from my eye. "You're just like me when I was younger… only more stubborn."

I tried to laugh but it was stuck in my throat.

"I hope you will stay now…" I could see her eyes flickering to N, who was hanging back, holding Whimsicott tenderly.

"No, it's too dangerous now." I shook my head, finally finding the things I wanted to say. "I don't… I don't want to stay here anyways." My mom flinched. "I love you, that won't ever change but… but I can't just stay here forever."

"For now though?"

"No. Mom, I can't… we can't." I shook my head. "I… I came to apologize and get my pokemon."

Her eyes filled with tears and for the first time in a long time she looked sickly again. "Just like that?"

I fought back my own tears. "I'm sorry… But we are going to the gym leaders, we are going to get help and get something done about this."

My mother was choking with sorrow. "I hate you being gone… how do I know what will happen to you, after you came back from getting chased by the police and… and what am I supposed to do?" her hands trembled around my face. "I don't want to lose you."

"Mom… you don't give me enough credit." I nearly moaned. "I… I can take care of myself!" but my heart wasn't in my voice. "Besides I have N with me… and my pokemon…"

MY mother just shook her head. "You want me to just sit back and watch you get hunted down by the police?"

I nodded. "That's all you can do… Bianca and Cheren will help me… and the gym leaders."

"You're in over your head… but then again you always are." She took her hands off my shoulder and wiped her tears away. She took a deep breath, shaky and pain filled. She coughed once then turned to open the front door. I shot N a glance before going in.

"I will be fine mom… I promise." I said heading up the stairs to my too familiar room. I opened the door and found Galvantula clicking around the ceiling. She came over to me quickly and I gave her a half hug before running to my dresser. Bisharp, Carrocosta, Samorott, Swoobat, and Galvantula's balls where sitting right where I left them. I took them all quickly, called her back and then stuffed them in the biggest backpack I had.

I also grabbed another pair of clothes and the few potions I found, they where nothing special, just leftovers I had from who knows how long ago. I headed back out, looking at my beloved room one more long moment. This wasn't the first time I had parted with it, but it was by far the hardest. Tears ebbed again, but I shook them away. It may have been the fact that if me and N didn't get things solved quickly we might not ever have the chance…

I flipped the light switch off and headed for the stairs.

"Touko…" my mother said from below me. "I… I know what Matt told you…"

I flinched, having completely forgot about the other night. She didn't have to bring it up… I was almost home free from the whole thing.

"I know you will never forgive him… I don't expect you to, but I have and… just know that he won't hurt you again."

I nodded, wondering with a heavy heart if my mother knew that I had bought condoms or not. It wasn't exactly at the top of my worry list, but it wasn't at the bottom either. I didn't know what to say, so I just continued down the stairs.

She stopped me at the bottom and forced another hug. I didn't resent it, but I was so traumatized that I couldn't enjoy it either.

"I love you." My mother told me.

"I love you too mom." I whispered. "I will be fine."

"Do you have your house key?" she asked, releasing me.

I gave her a look of misunderstanding.

"This will always be your home too…"

I reached into the front pocket on my jeans and pulled out the silver key I had used so many times.

She gave me a weak smile.

…

Bianca!" I yelled at the pay phone, interrupting her babbling. "I am in Striaton city! Can you and Cheren get here by this afternoon?"

"Cheren's Tranquill can't carry me and him Touko!" she yelled, making me flinch away from the phone "Why do we have to get there anyways?"

"I will tell you when you guys get here!"

"I don't understand…"

"It's important ok… please Bianca…" I felt my hopes beginning to slip. I looked outside sadly.

"Scott!" Whimsicott yelled into the end of the phone. I shushed him.

"Is that little Whimsy?" Bianca laughed. "Touko, I don't think we can get there by tonight but if not then tomorrow morning."

I sighed. "Ok."

"You ok?"

"Yeah, thank you Bianca, tell Cheren I said thank you too…" I felt bad… last I talked with Cheren he had been furious at me. I wondered if him and Bianca had ever gotten that night back on the ferriswheel together… part of me felt terrible for having been so hypocrite. If Bianca loved Cheren like I loved N… I shouldn't be standing in the way of them.

"No Problem." I heard Cheren's rusty voice on the other end.

"Oh Cheren… Are we ok?" I asked quietly.

There was a strange laugh. He sounded different on the phone… but then again, all guys did. "We're cool."

I smiled. "Can't wait to see you and Bianca."

"Me too." He said softly, maybe a hint of sadness in his voice, and then he hung up with a quick goodbye.

I glared at Whimsicott. "It's rude to interrupt when someone is talking on the phone."

He gave me a sheepish smile and shrugged.

"You don't use your voice much do you?" I pulled him around to be in my arms like he used to. It dawned on me that he had grown very much since I first found him. Not in size, but in personality. He was brave and devoted, maybe a bit more mischievous, but devoted none the less.

I walked away from the payphone and headed down a hallway. This pokemon center, at least right now, had open rooms. So I had paid for one and decided the only thing to do was buckle down for the night and wait. I wasn't about to go bother Chili, Cress, and Cilan right now. I would wait to explain everything to Bianca and Cheren and then go approach the flamboyant brothers.

Me and Whimsicott took the first left and down to the very end, our room was the last door. I didn't have the card key because I had left it with N so I knocked softly.

He didn't answer for a long moment and just before I was about to knock again Whimsicott shot from my arms and slipped like wind under the door. It opened a heartbeat later, Whimsicott hanging from the knob.

I looked past him and saw N sitting on the edge of the full size bed, in his hands where the face of my Carrocosta. He ran his fingers along his head and closed his eyes, looking troubled.

"Whats wrong?" I walked over. Never before had he escaped from his pokeball. "Did you let him out?"

Carrocosta looked at me with cloudy eyes and N's fallowed shortly.

"He isn't happy."

I sat beside N and placed my hand on the large pokemons head. "What's wrong?" I asked him.

He made a low grumbling noise.

"He just… doesn't feel very… well…" N looked up at me. "loved…"

I felt absolutely terrible, now that I realized I hadn't used Carrocosta in quite some time, and even then it was just a quick battle with Black's Zebstrika. I bent down to look my pokemon in the eyes. He looked sorry, not for himself, but for having felt the way he did.

"I'm sorry Carrocosta…" I whispered. "You know I value you just like any of my other pokemon."

N looked very emotional. Sometimes I wondered if it was too much for him, the ability to read pokemon and their emotions.

"Scott!" Whimsicott ran up to him and looked the huge turtle in the eyes. "Whims!" he smiled brightly.

Carrocosta, who never seemed fond of young pokemon, looked to except whatever Whimsicott had said. He nodded once then looked back up at me, a new light in his dark ocean blue eyes.

"Tell you what." I gave him a gentle nudge. "What do you say we go swimming?"

His face turned up completely, happy with the idea. I bent and hugged his huge head before getting up and walking across the room to my bag with my stuff. I still had the swim suit I wore for the photo shoot; Elisa had given it to me, probably in trade for my pain in the ass Emolga at the time. I didn't want to trade, it just happened that way. Still, it was a beautiful swim suit.

N looked up at me. "Swimming? When it's this cold out?" he knew I didn't appreciate the cold so this baffled him.

"I won't get soaked…" I pulled all of my hair up in a tight pony tail.

N shrugged when I headed to the bathroom, and then turned his attention back to Carrocosta. I was happy N wasn't the type of guy to protect me from things he knew I would do anyways. Had it been Cheren sitting there, he would have lectured me on why it was irrational to go swimming in the cold. IF it was Black… he probably would have cracked perverted jokes on how he wanted to swim with me too.

I looked at myself in the mirror and there was something different there, I never noticed before, a slightly different lightness to the whole idea of swimming in the chilly water in winter with N and Carrocosta. Memories of fighting N came back, along with memories of reviving Carrocosta more twice… he had been the weakest of my team at the time, but proven himself in the end. It was him that had beaten Reshiram.

I shrugged my clothes off quickly and folded them. I set them on the sink and stepped into the little bikini bottoms that shimmered a silvery-blue. The top wasn't much different, but sent chills of memory back to me. I remembered falling into the ocean when modeling and how freezing that water had been. Hopefully the little lakes around here would be that cold…

It also reminded me that Samorott would like a good swim… come to think of it… all my pokemon could use a little exercise.

I looked at myself in the mirror and tied the string to the top around my neck. It fit nice and snug.

"Are you going swimming too?" I asked N as I stepped out into the hotel room. My answer was right in front of me, considering I got a whole shot of N's back side as he slipped on a pair of khaki shorts. He didn't have an actual swim, but that was good enough.

"Of course." He flashed me a brilliant smile. "You know there is a lake around here that doesn't have many run-offs from the mountains. It shouldn't be very cold." He told me.

"Trainer lake right?" I said.

"What?" he suddenly looked pale… "That's what they call it?" memories flashed in his eyes.

"Yeah why?"

"Well… back when… all that was going on." He ran a hand through his hair. "Team Plasma was ordered to run the trainers out and… liberate." He looked ashamed, and I noticed how he never said HE ordered team plasma, even though we both knew very well it was him.

"Oh…well last time I checked trainers where still letting their pokemon out there." I said, remembering how I stopped there at the beginning of my second journey, before I found N.

"Oh… good." He flinched and stood up. "Let's go." There was a forced smile on his face.


	25. Chapter 25

The sun seemed to never rise the next day, despite the lightening of the sky. It was still cloudy and very dank outside. I was listening to the trees, trying to find comfort in the gently scratching sound of bare branches on each other. Whimsicott was looking better, and N was more or less happy to be alive.

He had left for a while in search or oran berries, which I told him wouldn't be growing this time of year, but he insisted anyways. So I was especially surprised when he came back, his jacket slung over his arm and a whole bunch of them wrapped carefully inside. Whimsicott sat up a little straighter, looking happy to see the food.

"They really aren't that great…" he came over to us and unfolded the jacket. Most of the little blue berries where wrinkled and some had marks where a bird had pecked at them, but they were ok.

"No this is more than I expected." I picked one up and popped it in my mouth. "Where did you find them?"

N shrugged. "It's easy when pokemon are willing to help…" he smiled. "In other words, a little Pidove in a tree told me."

I laughed a nervous laugh and swallowed the somewhat bitter thing. "I was thinking… if I can find Bianca and Cheren… they could help us N."

He seemed to frown. "How?"

"Well… Bianca has connections with Elisa and… being that I am sorta the champion of Unova… I think I could get a hold of the Gym leaders… some of them might be a little weary but I know they would help. The former Champion, Alder, he would vouch for me."

"But what good will that do anyways? It's not like you are being hunted down, it's me." He raised a hand and set it on Whimsicott's head. He was too busy stuffing his face to notice.

"But with their help we can prove you innocent. It's the law N."

"Since when has team Plasma ever cared about the law?" he grumbled to himself. I sighed.

"I don't suppose you have a better idea?"

"I could… well…"

"What?"

"I could go back and…"

"NO!" I grabbed his hand as it reached for another berry. "You can't go back!"

"I know there are people that would follow me Touko." He tried to explain. "They would side with me… because they never wanted to put up with all that was happening before anyways. A lot of the Grunts only worked for me and team plasma so they could feed their families."

"So you want to just prance back in there and ask who wants to join you in going against your own father. Their leader?"

"I could make it seem like I really was coming back to do my job…" he looked away. "I could make them believe that I want to be king again; they know with my ability to talk with pokemon I can do it. They would have to let me have another chance…"

I shook my head. "It's too risky. What about that photographer, she saw what happened… she would… she would ruin it anyways!" I hadn't the heart to tell him that I was really just too afraid of being away from him.

"Touko…"

"Please…" I bit my lip. The worst part was that his plan was better than mine and I knew destroying team Plasma from the inside out was the way to do it…

N looked down, not sure what to say. Finally be mumbled. "I probably wouldn't be able to pull it off anyways… I would miss you too much."

I smiled and laughed shakily. "You are a pretty terrible liar." Relief washed over me.

"There is a problem with your plan though." N went on. "You don't have any of your other pokemon and… something tells me you will need them if you are going up against team plasma… again."

I cursed under my breath. "Maybe I can sneak into my house and-"

"No." N cut me off.

"What?"

"You need to clear things up with you mother." He looked terrified, not having much experience with a child to parent relationship. But he was right. "You are going to need all the help you can get right?"

I nodded with a sigh.

"It's not that bad." He gave me a gently nudge. "I would do it for you if I could."

"I know I know… parents can be so difficult sometimes though…"

N laughed, startling me. "Hey, your mom might be a little secretive and over-protective, but I would take her over my father any day."

I rolled me eyes. "I guess I should feel pretty lucky to have the mom that I do…" I murmured, the humor leaving my face in a frown. "I will clear things up with her… She is my mom after all, I love her."

N smiled at me.

"But if you think I am going to forgive and forget about that wretched man that thinks he is my father—

"No one said anything about that…" N muttered. "But if it is really a problem we could always trade fathers."

I looked at him, raising an eyebrow. "You need to stop doing that you know…"

"What?"

"Being so smart all the time." I said simply, ignoring the fact that he was so clearly saying my father was better than his. I didn't doubt that either.

He smiled at me, his emerald eyes dancing. How could the two of us be so happy together in a time of crisis? I knew the only answer was the fact that we were just so in love with each other.

"So off to your mother's then?" N asked after a long moment of listening to the sound of the squishy berries in Whimsicott's mouth.

I nodded and sighed again. "Right…"

….

I took a deep breath as I approached the front door of my home… the place I knew like the back of my hand. Every crevice or scratch in the old house was familiar. I could count ever window and tell you exactly which ones opened and which ones would get stuck about halfway through. But what wasn't familiar to me… was the way I felt. Like I didn't quite belong here…

We had abandoned the truck in the forest, knowing that brining back would do nothing but cause more problems. So N stood back, on the dirt road that leads down the center of town. He was watching me, blinking and nodding with encouragement.

I stalled for a long moment, trying to figure out what exactly to say… the only thing that would be prudent enough was "I'm sorry" though… I knew I had to admit defeat.

My shaky hand rapped on the door quietly.

There was a long silence before the door opened and my mother through herself around me, her arms stretched across my body and she was shaking, babbling through her teeth, trying to understand that every part of me was ok. I tried to ignore the fact that this was her fault to begin with… She had been in on it… the whole thing with the Liza.

But I couldn't be angry, or even somewhat upset, I was just too happy to know that my mother still loved me. Teas swelled in my eyes and she started to rock back and forth, hugging me tighter and tighter.

"M- mom. I'm s-so sorry." I started to sob. "I shouldn't have l-left."

"I'm sorry." My mother whispered. "I just… I wanted you to be safe and I know the way I was going about it… was wrong"

One of the best things about my mom was she always knew when she was wrong. In this case though, I didn't quite understand her reasoning.

"I know now… you're not going to leave N are you? No chance in you just forgetting about him and being safe at home with me and your pokemon?" she said looking me in the eyes with her identical ones. I saw my bedraggled reflection there and slowly shook my head.

She sighed, but understood. THIS was the woman I had come to know as my mom, not someone who sneaks out in the middle of the night to go see my runaway father.

"What am I gonna do with you?" she brushed my hair back and wiped away a tear from my eye. "You're just like me when I was younger… only more stubborn."

I tried to laugh but it was stuck in my throat.

"I hope you will stay now…" I could see her eyes flickering to N, who was hanging back, holding Whimsicott tenderly.

"No, it's too dangerous now." I shook my head, finally finding the things I wanted to say. "I don't… I don't want to stay here anyways." My mom flinched. "I love you, that won't ever change but… but I can't just stay here forever."

"For now though?"

"No. Mom, I can't… we can't." I shook my head. "I… I came to apologize and get my pokemon."

Her eyes filled with tears and for the first time in a long time she looked sickly again. "Just like that?"

I fought back my own tears. "I'm sorry… But we are going to the gym leaders, we are going to get help and get something done about this."

My mother was choking with sorrow. "I hate you being gone… how do I know what will happen to you, after you came back from getting chased by the police and… and what am I supposed to do?" her hands trembled around my face. "I don't want to lose you."

"Mom… you don't give me enough credit." I nearly moaned. "I… I can take care of myself!" but my heart wasn't in my voice. "Besides I have N with me… and my pokemon…"

MY mother just shook her head. "You want me to just sit back and watch you get hunted down by the police?"

I nodded. "That's all you can do… Bianca and Cheren will help me… and the gym leaders."

"You're in over your head… but then again you always are." She took her hands off my shoulder and wiped her tears away. She took a deep breath, shaky and pain filled. She coughed once then turned to open the front door. I shot N a glance before going in.

"I will be fine mom… I promise." I said heading up the stairs to my too familiar room. I opened the door and found Galvantula clicking around the ceiling. She came over to me quickly and I gave her a half hug before running to my dresser. Bisharp, Carrocosta, Samorott, Swoobat, and Galvantula's balls where sitting right where I left them. I took them all quickly, called her back and then stuffed them in the biggest backpack I had.

I also grabbed another pair of clothes and the few potions I found, they where nothing special, just leftovers I had from who knows how long ago. I headed back out, looking at my beloved room one more long moment. This wasn't the first time I had parted with it, but it was by far the hardest. Tears ebbed again, but I shook them away. It may have been the fact that if me and N didn't get things solved quickly we might not ever have the chance…

I flipped the light switch off and headed for the stairs.

"Touko…" my mother said from below me. "I… I know what Matt told you…"

I flinched, having completely forgot about the other night. She didn't have to bring it up… I was almost home free from the whole thing.

"I know you will never forgive him… I don't expect you to, but I have and… just know that he won't hurt you again."

I nodded, wondering with a heavy heart if my mother knew that I had bought condoms or not. It wasn't exactly at the top of my worry list, but it wasn't at the bottom either. I didn't know what to say, so I just continued down the stairs.

She stopped me at the bottom and forced another hug. I didn't resent it, but I was so traumatized that I couldn't enjoy it either.

"I love you." My mother told me.

"I love you too mom." I whispered. "I will be fine."

"Do you have your house key?" she asked, releasing me.

I gave her a look of misunderstanding.

"This will always be your home too…"

I reached into the front pocket on my jeans and pulled out the silver key I had used so many times.

She gave me a weak smile.

…

Bianca!" I yelled at the pay phone, interrupting her babbling. "I am in Striaton city! Can you and Cheren get here by this afternoon?"

"Cheren's Tranquill can't carry me and him Touko!" she yelled, making me flinch away from the phone "Why do we have to get there anyways?"

"I will tell you when you guys get here!"

"I don't understand…"

"It's important ok… please Bianca…" I felt my hopes beginning to slip. I looked outside sadly.

"Scott!" Whimsicott yelled into the end of the phone. I shushed him.

"Is that little Whimsy?" Bianca laughed. "Touko, I don't think we can get there by tonight but if not then tomorrow morning."

I sighed. "Ok."

"You ok?"

"Yeah, thank you Bianca, tell Cheren I said thank you too…" I felt bad… last I talked with Cheren he had been furious at me. I wondered if him and Bianca had ever gotten that night back on the ferriswheel together… part of me felt terrible for having been so hypocrite. If Bianca loved Cheren like I loved N… I shouldn't be standing in the way of them.

"No Problem." I heard Cheren's rusty voice on the other end.

"Oh Cheren… Are we ok?" I asked quietly.

There was a strange laugh. He sounded different on the phone… but then again, all guys did. "We're cool."

I smiled. "Can't wait to see you and Bianca."

"Me too." He said softly, maybe a hint of sadness in his voice, and then he hung up with a quick goodbye.

I glared at Whimsicott. "It's rude to interrupt when someone is talking on the phone."

He gave me a sheepish smile and shrugged.

"You don't use your voice much do you?" I pulled him around to be in my arms like he used to. It dawned on me that he had grown very much since I first found him. Not in size, but in personality. He was brave and devoted, maybe a bit more mischievous, but devoted none the less.

I walked away from the payphone and headed down a hallway. This pokemon center, at least right now, had open rooms. So I had paid for one and decided the only thing to do was buckle down for the night and wait. I wasn't about to go bother Chili, Cress, and Cilan right now. I would wait to explain everything to Bianca and Cheren and then go approach the flamboyant brothers.

Me and Whimsicott took the first left and down to the very end, our room was the last door. I didn't have the card key because I had left it with N so I knocked softly.

He didn't answer for a long moment and just before I was about to knock again Whimsicott shot from my arms and slipped like wind under the door. It opened a heartbeat later, Whimsicott hanging from the knob.

I looked past him and saw N sitting on the edge of the full size bed, in his hands where the face of my Carrocosta. He ran his fingers along his head and closed his eyes, looking troubled.

"Whats wrong?" I walked over. Never before had he escaped from his pokeball. "Did you let him out?"

Carrocosta looked at me with cloudy eyes and N's fallowed shortly.

"He isn't happy."

I sat beside N and placed my hand on the large pokemons head. "What's wrong?" I asked him.

He made a low grumbling noise.

"He just… doesn't feel very… well…" N looked up at me. "loved…"

I felt absolutely terrible, now that I realized I hadn't used Carrocosta in quite some time, and even then it was just a quick battle with Black's Zebstrika. I bent down to look my pokemon in the eyes. He looked sorry, not for himself, but for having felt the way he did.

"I'm sorry Carrocosta…" I whispered. "You know I value you just like any of my other pokemon."

N looked very emotional. Sometimes I wondered if it was too much for him, the ability to read pokemon and their emotions.

"Scott!" Whimsicott ran up to him and looked the huge turtle in the eyes. "Whims!" he smiled brightly.

Carrocosta, who never seemed fond of young pokemon, looked to except whatever Whimsicott had said. He nodded once then looked back up at me, a new light in his dark ocean blue eyes.

"Tell you what." I gave him a gentle nudge. "What do you say we go swimming?"

His face turned up completely, happy with the idea. I bent and hugged his huge head before getting up and walking across the room to my bag with my stuff. I still had the swim suit I wore for the photo shoot; Elisa had given it to me, probably in trade for my pain in the ass Emolga at the time. I didn't want to trade, it just happened that way. Still, it was a beautiful swim suit.

N looked up at me. "Swimming? When it's this cold out?" he knew I didn't appreciate the cold so this baffled him.

"I won't get soaked…" I pulled all of my hair up in a tight pony tail.

N shrugged when I headed to the bathroom, and then turned his attention back to Carrocosta. I was happy N wasn't the type of guy to protect me from things he knew I would do anyways. Had it been Cheren sitting there, he would have lectured me on why it was irrational to go swimming in the cold. IF it was Black… he probably would have cracked perverted jokes on how he wanted to swim with me too.

I looked at myself in the mirror and there was something different there, I never noticed before, a slightly different lightness to the whole idea of swimming in the chilly water in winter with N and Carrocosta. Memories of fighting N came back, along with memories of reviving Carrocosta more twice… he had been the weakest of my team at the time, but proven himself in the end. It was him that had beaten Reshiram.

I shrugged my clothes off quickly and folded them. I set them on the sink and stepped into the little bikini bottoms that shimmered a silvery-blue. The top wasn't much different, but sent chills of memory back to me. I remembered falling into the ocean when modeling and how freezing that water had been. Hopefully the little lakes around here would be that cold…

It also reminded me that Samorott would like a good swim… come to think of it… all my pokemon could use a little exercise.

I looked at myself in the mirror and tied the string to the top around my neck. It fit nice and snug.

"Are you going swimming too?" I asked N as I stepped out into the hotel room. My answer was right in front of me, considering I got a whole shot of N's back side as he slipped on a pair of khaki shorts. He didn't have an actual swim, but that was good enough.

"Of course." He flashed me a brilliant smile. "You know there is a lake around here that doesn't have many run-offs from the mountains. It shouldn't be very cold." He told me.

"Trainer lake right?" I said.

"What?" he suddenly looked pale… "That's what they call it?" memories flashed in his eyes.

"Yeah why?"

"Well… back when… all that was going on." He ran a hand through his hair. "Team Plasma was ordered to run the trainers out and… liberate." He looked ashamed, and I noticed how he never said HE ordered team plasma, even though we both knew very well it was him.

"Oh…well last time I checked trainers where still letting their pokemon out there." I said, remembering how I stopped there at the beginning of my second journey, before I found N.

"Oh… good." He flinched and stood up. "Let's go." There was a forced smile on his face.


	26. Chapter 26

Morning light filled N's bedroom in the way only it could. My previous heavy head and frantic emotions faded into a soft, light bliss, and I no longer felt the pain of knowing what had been lost. It was just me and N and nothing else mattered anymore, the past was behind us, and the future was looking somewhat bright.  
I ran my hand down N's head, stroking the long tendrils of hair and remember with a faint blush what had happened only a few hours ago. I supposed his sweats were still soiled as well.  
It wasn't hard to imagine that everything I had done and seen wasn't a dream. I knew I had been thinking that a lot lately… but it was all just so hard to believe. Almost as hard as it was to believe Mienshao had risked her life as well as her unborn baby's in that final battle against N's Zoroark. I sighed.  
Mienshao had always put battle and loyalty to me before anything else. She loved Scrafty of course… but he had been her second best. Maybe it should have bothered me to know that her baby was also second best. Even so… I couldn't find the strength to be upset about her risking its life, how could I? She had been so loyal and faithful to me. Everything she did was for me.  
I had spent enough time thinking about these things throughout the night that it was unnecessary now, like I said… the only thing that mattered now was the future and the present.  
N stirred over me, his peaceful sleep being disturbed by the light like mine had been. This room really did get to be bright.  
"Good morning." I whispered kissing the top of his head. I couldn't see him smiling but it was in his throaty voice when he spoke.  
"That's nice…"  
"Hmm?"  
"You being here again… to wake up and see you." he turned and propped himself up on his elbows to be looking down at me. His thick lashes cast soft shadows on his cheeks and his emerald eyes were more vivid than I remembered. The color of his skin seemed more luscious, and the tiny gap between his front teeth brought back a wonderful lull in my chest. I smiled.  
"You can wake up with me every single day of your life." I said softly to him, brushing strands of hair out of his face. "As soon as we get you out of here."  
"And we can do THAT every night." his face turned a darker shade at the memory.  
I laughed under my breath. "Well I don't know about that…"  
He refused to be bothered. "No, I think we can." He nodded, but I could tell he was dropping the subject. I breathed in the musky smell of him and let it drench my throat. Wait until he feels real sex…  
"So what is the plan?" he brought me out of the daydream forming in my head.  
I had spent some time thinking of a way around all this, but I came to the conclusion that N was just too closely monitored to do it secretively without anyone else's help. I would have to call Kayne on the cell phone he left me and see where he was and how long we would have to wait. Or we could just break the hell out…  
"You have Reshiram's pokeball?" I asked.  
He nodded.  
"And my pokemon?"  
He nodded again.  
"That's all we need." But still… leaving Kayne waiting for a phone call wasn't right. He was the one who brought me here anyways, he was the one who was giving me that chance needed to save N and stop team Plasma once and for all.  
"Wait… Touko there's something I have to tell you first." N said as I squirmed under him. He refused to let me move even an inch.  
"What's that?" I didn't understand this sudden seriousness.  
He blinked awkwardly before going on. "Well… I'm not exactly sure if Plasma has done it yet… but they are after a legendary pokemon and I'm not sure that… that you can stop it." he admitted.  
"What?" my hopes seemed to slip beneath me and fly away at the sound. At the time when N had recovered the legendary Reshiram, I had recovered Zekrom… and my rule about legendaries had left me to freeing the pokemon after he helped me battle. When Zekrom had been worn out after defeating Reshiram I had released him, in hopes that it would spare his life or capture from Team Plasma.  
Of course I didn't know for sure at the time that I would to N, I had actually been pretty sure I would win, so setting him free in the midst of battle hadn't felt like a mistake. I knew now that maybe if I would have kept him a bit longer I could have changed the fate of Mienshao and my own capture.  
And now I was legendary-less and apparently Team Plasma wasn't.  
"Who? N!" I looked him in the eyes with slight panic. Why? Why was it whenever we had a good thing going something just HAD to go and ruin it? "Not Zekrom right?" That's all I needed to know… that my attempts at saving the pokemon from capture failed in the end anyways. I couldn't help but feel like the pokemon was still mine, despite the release.  
"No… no it's a completely different pokemon." N shook his head. "I was going to tell you… and… I just forgot… last night." he turned another shade darker.  
"What pokemon is it?" I asked softly as he put his head back onto my chest. His nose skimmed the length of my jaw and I felt like I was holding a child.  
"Its name is Kyurem." He said slowly as if the name was foreign to him. "It's very powerful, an ice and dragon type."  
"But you don't know if they have captured it yet?" I stared at the ceiling with wonder. I had never heard of this pokemon before so I couldn't begin to picture it. When I thought of an ice type, thanks to previous analogies all I could picture was Tate.  
What was Tate doing right now? I flinched, trying to picture him furious over me leaving… or more importantly furious with Kayne for taking me away. I tried to picture what Kayne had told me the night in my bedroom… Tate crying… over me…  
"The sages took over pretty much everything after you left… I think they were happy that I couldn't do my work…" he stated calmly. "So no one told me about it… I've just been overhearing things."  
I sighed. "Then all we can do is hope they haven't found it yet… You have Reshiram though. A fire dragon type will easily beat an ice dragon type."  
My logic seemed to amuse him for some reason. The seriousness faded from his eyes almost as soon as it came. "Right."  
"What's so funny?" I glowered.  
"You being a trainer… I had almost forgotten."  
I knew he was just joking but it still bothered me. "Mind you." I poked him in the side. "I beat you in battle once already, how could you forget?"  
He just laughed and slid away from me, leaving my bare chest exposed to the light. I glanced down at my horrid tan lines and pulled my arms up over me in attempt to hide myself. He hadn't actually seen anything last night… felt things sure… but he still didn't know what a female's upper half LOOKED like.  
He rolled to be on his back next to me as I sat up and looked down at him. I frowned, seeing that still, despite all my hoping and praying it would stop, he was still tattered with cuts and bruises.  
"Why are you hiding yourself?" N didn't notice my frown. He tugged on my elbow, trying to dislodge my arms from my chest.  
I pulled slightly away. "We should probably talk about this kind of stuff…" I bit my lip, searching the huge bed for my bra. It must have fallen on the floor.  
He sat up eagerly. "Teach me."  
"Where is my shirt?" I said first.  
"I don't know." He shrugged. "What does it matter?"  
"Ughh…" I groaned and hauled the heavy blue comforter up to my chest instead. "Ok… well to start with, most girls don't take their shirts off in front of people."  
"Why not?" he cocked his head slightly to the side.  
I blushed. "Well… never mind… let me just… ugh…"  
"What's wrong?"  
"I don't know where to start…" I looked across the bed to the foot where Mienshao had manifested herself to me. A cold shiver crawled up my spine. She was here now…  
"We are friends, N." I said simply, catching a glimpse of his glee-filled eyes at the word. "But usually friends don't do things like what we did last night."  
"Why not?"  
"Most friends you just… talk to and hang out and have pokemon battles with. That kind of stuff. Only… really special friends do things like we did."  
He was beaming. "Then that's a good thing right?"  
"Well… sort of. What we did was something a boyfriend and girlfriend would do. Remember those grunts we saw in the hallway a long time ago? They were kissing?"  
He nodded.  
"They were boyfriend and girlfriend."  
"Are we boyfriend and girlfriend?"  
I huffed a laugh and couldn't look him in the eyes. "Well… yes. Otherwise I wouldn't kiss you and stuff."  
"I learned that when you love someone, like I love you, you are supposed to marry them. Is that true?" he asked. "Would you still be my girlfriend or would you be my wife?"  
Well at least he had some sense of relationships...  
"I would be your wife. But it's not that simple."  
He smiled. "I like being boyfriend and girlfriend better anyways. Then you kiss me and do what we did last night with me."  
I nodded. I could have told him that being married would mean MORE of that, and even better versions of it too… but it just seemed like a complex conversation not worth getting into right now.  
I was looking down at him, trying to decide what to say next when his eyes grew wide and I realized he wasn't looking at my face anymore. I glanced down and found the comforter having slipped down off of me.  
"Don't look!" I yanked it back up and buried my face into it, hiding the devastation. My eyes were squeezed shut so tight it hurt and only shut tighter when N's hand reached forward and pried the blanket away from me.  
His voice was soft. "Why are you acting strange now?"  
I peeked at him, trying to ignore the fact that he had seen my breasts and terrible tan lines. His face was soft as his voice.  
"Why are you ashamed? I like it…"  
His hand curled around my side gently and he smiled sheepishly at me. "It makes me feel good… and…" his face fell then and he pulled back.  
I pulled the comforter up again and this time he didn't try and stop me. "You really don't know anything about yourself do you?"  
He blinked nervously and shook his head. "I don't think so."  
"That feeling you get when you see my breasts… or when I kiss you… or any of that." I took a deep breath. "That's just you being a horny teenager."  
"What?"  
"Horny, N, Horny." I shook my head and the blush rose to my cheeks. "That thing that happens to you." and I pointed with one reluctant finger to his crotch. "Is because you are horny, or turned on."  
"What does that mean?"  
"It means you want to… well, I guess it just means you are attracted to someone." I fidgeted nervously.  
"Of course I'm attracted to you." he made it sound like I insulted myself. "But… can I ask you something?"  
"Sure." I rolled my eyes.  
"Why did it erupt last night?"  
I wanted to laugh so hard, but I knew it would only upset him. I knew it would just make him feel bad about not understanding. So I held it in and ground my teeth together for a minute to stabilize myself.  
"That's what happens when you… do things like we did last night." I couldn't look at him now. "When you rub it or stroke it…" I almost choked on the words. "It builds up and then you just…"  
"Explode?"  
"Sure." I allowed. "You release that…"  
"Slimy stuff."  
This time I couldn't help but let a giggle escape my mouth. "Yeah, that stuff. You release it and they you feel better right?"  
He nodded. "But it feels best when it's happening."  
"I can't believe you came…" I whispered under my breath, thanking that someone in the world invented pants at one point. I would have had full on sex with him last night…  
"I what?"  
"Well… that "slimy stuff"" I quoted him. "It's called… cum… and when it… came out of you… Well… the… verb, I guess…"  
His eyes were content, kind of prying.  
"You were cumming. Or you came."  
"Coming?"  
I nodded, knowing he didn't quite understand.  
"I hope you know not to talk about this kind of stuff with other people." I crossed my arms over the blanket shielding my chest. "It isn't a normal conversation to just have."  
"Thank you for telling me then." He smiled gently. "I'm sorry I made you embarrassed."  
I touched his face gently and sighed. "It's ok… but seriously where is my shirt?" I crawled to the edge of the bed and looked over. I didn't see my shirt but his was lying in a heap. I reached down and took, still shielding myself with one hand. I could feel N's eyes boring into my back as I through the black tshirt over me.  
He was smiling when I turned and slid off the bed.  
"Do you want to see your pokemon now?"  
My spirits rose and my face lit up. "More than anything."

~Kayne~

Everything was hurting…  
My heart wouldn't pick up the pace, and it felt like every time it beat it was drumming on my ribs, shaking my insides like some serious bass. I groaned, my head resting limp against a palm tree trunk. It was pitch black out and the only light came from the moon reflecting on the water.  
The cool tide was creeping up below me, touching the tip of toes as my feet dangled down from the petrified log I was sitting on. I was slumped over, barely able to hold myself up as the sound of the waves grew softer and the sound of my heartbeat grew louder. Silence stretched on for moments at a time as I waited, anticipating it like one would a hiccup.  
Another thundering blow struck me in the chest, making me groan. I whimpered, hating this more than anything. I was so scared…  
Tate never wanted me to know what it was like to die, and Bobby never cared enough about me to tell me. So I wasn't sure what to expect. I had actually signed that plasma contract in my own blood without reading it… they said they would spare my pokemons life if I did…  
They promised me a medicine that would cure my Flygon's cancer and I had been stupid… too willing to hear the double meaning in there words. They "transformed" me into a member of the shadow triad, and then took my pokemon, saying that I wouldn't be getting him back until he was fully cured.  
I still didn't know if he was ok…  
The only thing I had to hold onto was the hope that Plasma had upheld their end of the deal and healed him. Even if they let him go afterwards, hopefully he was still alive. It was the only thing I had to hold onto anymore. There isn't another thing in this world I would give my life for… my pokemon meant everything to me.  
And here I was… dying in place of my long lost Flygon.  
Garchomp's pokeball kept shaking, trembling and begging to be opened. It was attached to my belt, making it hard to ignore, and also hard to refuse. But Garchomp shouldn't have to see me like this.  
My nails dug into the palm trees bark as another pulse erupted in my chest. The blood was roaring in my ears, making it hard to focus. Even my vision was fading.  
Was this what I had agreed to? I was dying… and for what? For Team Plasma to take my pokemon? For my brother Bobby to hate me? For Tate to ignore me?  
I had to get out of here… I had to survive… to fight this and live…  
I stopped, forcing myself to breathe in and out and push my lungs further apart with every breath. I tried to hurry and sum up the strength to teleport but it wasn't working. I was heaving with effort, trying to imagine Touko's room in the Plasma castle. It was simple enough to see; normally I wouldn't have a problem getting there, even if I wasn't in Unova.  
Just when I thought I might have enough strength to make it somewhere another heartbeat stopped me and flung all that gathered will backward. I almost fell off the log into the salty water below me, but I barely caught myself.  
Suddenly Garchomp flew from his pokeball and cried out to me. He landed in the sand and the mud splattered my face. I shook my head and looked up at him, gritting my teeth.  
"Get back in your pokeball." I hissed.  
Without hesitation he screamed at me. My eyes grew huge as he bared his teeth and anger pulsed through his eyes.  
"Garchomp…" I squinted to understand. "What is it boy?"  
He snarled and ducked his head down, nostrils flaring to warn me.  
"Garchomp it's… its me!" I shoved away from the trees and my feet sunk into the sand. I stumbled with a sharp pain in my chest and landed on my knees, water lapping up to my elbows. "It's me Kayne!" I rasped.  
He roared, his dagger teeth glinting in the moonlight. One warning slash went out to me, as if to say not to come closer. I felt the air from his bladed arm and flinched.  
What was happening!  
"Garchomp you obey me!" I demanded, salty tears mixing with salty water on my face as I tried to find the strength to stand. "I'm your trainer… I'm your friend."  
But it was no use… he didn't know who I was anymore. He didn't recognize the trainer I once was… he no longer could see a living Kayne with blood moving throughout his body. All Garchomp could see was a moving corpse.  
I stared up into the eyes of the strongest pokemon I had ever raised. Since he was just a Gible we had been together. Tears fell. I ruined everything in making that damn deal with team Plasma. I felt like I had made a deal with the devil. I might as well have…  
"Please… Garchomp it's me… Remember… I dug you out of cave that collapsed…" I begged, trying to make him remember. "We're a te—  
My voice cut off into a wretched wail of pain. My body trembled and I felt like every tendon was tightening.  
Garchomp wouldn't stop snarling. He wouldn't stop screeching at me. Water slapped my in the face as I lay down on the cold sandy floor, unable to find the strength to speak.  
Garchomp opened his mouth wide to me, gathering an eerie blue flame in the back of his throat and threatening to let it loose against me. My eyes lolled as I prepared to feel the full power of an attack I had taught him. My whole body seemed to go numb with fear.  
In a last, desperate attempt to get away I sucked in a deep breath and balled my hands up into fists. From somewhere in me I managed the strength to teleport, though too late I wasn't sure. I could feel a terrible heat as I tried to grasp what little life was left in my veins. Lucky for me though I was gone before my own pokemon could kill me.  
Or would I have been happier dying by the fate of my pokemon?  
Either way death was death.


	27. Chapter 27

N and I were waiting impatiently unsure of what to do next. I had explained to N all about how the two shadow triad members have been coming to me for quite some time now. And I have to admit, he wasn't all that happy…  
N told me that Tate was trouble. Pure disloyal and disobedient trouble. He said that he could never trust him and that the two never seemed to get along. N even told me—not knowing that me and Tate were as close as we were—that he purposefully didn't make Tate the leader of the triad because he didn't like him. He had made Bobby leader, which I'm sure pissed Tate off at the time.  
I spared N a lot of the gory details about me and Tate and how he had kept me company many times during the day while N was out doing his normal rounds. I had told him—though he already knew—about how it was Tate's duty to serve me and how Kayne was just along for the ride. He was actually surprised that it was only Tate who was that devoted to the separation between Plasma.  
There wasn't much else worth talking about, unless I gave away Bobby's secret about working for Team Rocket somewhere in Kanto, but I didn't see what good that would do. It had nothing to do with me anyways.  
And I didn't tell N that Tate was the one who wanted to set off the alarms that night I was thrown out the window. N would have been furious and despite the slight desire to see him in such a state, I wasn't going to chance it. Besides, you would freak out if you found out who got the person you loved thrown out a window.  
The only thing I did tell N actually was that Tate had been the one to save me that night. As much as I hated to believe it myself, I knew the only reason I hadn't splattered on the ground was because Tate had caught me and teleported me away. N was about as thrilled with the idea of Tate saving me as I was. It was clear as day in his eyes though.  
He loathed Tate.  
I sighed, thinking about what to do. I was staring at the cell phone sitting on the bed in front of me. As if staring would make it ring…  
I almost laughed a humorless laugh, but Unfezant stopped me with a gentle crooning noise. He ruffled his feathers up next to me, more than happy to be by my side. I rubbed the long antennae like things coming off his head and then scratched at his well muscled neck.  
Scrafty was on my other side, sitting with his legs out in front of him and staring out the window to his left. The longing in his eyes was raw, and it made me wonder if he had known about his unborn child before Mienshao had died. If he knew then I could understand how much real suffering was in his eyes. It was almost like now that I knew I could see it more clearly.  
With my empty hand I reached out and gave him an affectionate nudge. He turned to look back at me smiling at him, any attempt to be happier. He returned the favor but it took some effort on his part.  
"As soon as we get out of here guys we're going to have some great battle practice." I spoke across the whole room, calling to Samorott and Reuniclus who were dozing in the sunshine by the window. The both looked up at me and nodded in agreement.  
Crypt spun excitedly around my head, whirling in the line of fire from the air vent and playing some sort of peekaboo with Unfezant. He stopped to make his unmistakable purring noise and then nuzzled against my chest.  
"He really loves you a lot." N spoke from his spot on the bed. His Zoroark had insisted on cramming himself between us and the thick fur was making me hot.  
I had turned once already—to lean over and kiss N—only to find that Zoroark had morphed into a second perfect copy of the guy I loved. And so I had planted a kiss right on Zoroark/fake N's forehead. It was somewhat humorous, but I couldn't really get the taste of pokemon off my lips now.  
So when I turned to look at N I had to double take and make sure that it was actually him. The tiny gap showing between his top teeth was reassurance.  
"Of course he loves me." I said simply running a hand through the mist-like body of Crypt. "He's my favorite ghost type."  
"He is your only ghost type." N laughed. Zoroark yawned from between us and looked up at Crypt with a bored and slightly annoyed expression. The two didn't seem to get along, and it was making Crypt weary.  
A dark type like Zoroark would have an advantage over Crypt; of course he was being cautious. I wanted to believe the type of a pokemon wouldn't make them dislike each other so quickly, but it seemed to be the only option. There was no other reason why Zoroark would dislike Crypt anyways.  
And if that was the case then Reuniclus would dislike Crypt as well, and the two had become great friends within the last couple hours.  
Maybe Zoroark just needs an attitude adjustment, I thought simply, about to ask N what his pokemon was thinking of mine, but a familiar swish caught my attention. I glanced across the room as a faint flash was echoed with a thud.  
Kayne dropped to the floor, soaked to the bone and gasping, clutching his chest and the nearby windowsill for mercy. Agony ripped across his face and I was off the bed in a second, racing to his side with my pokemon gathering more slowly. N stayed back but was watching with intense eyes; I felt his stares boring into my back.  
Kayne must not have noticed me at first, what with all the pain and distractions, but when he went limp on the ground and his whole body just succumbed to the floor, he must have heard my terrified gasp.  
I dropped down next to him and my hand flew to his shoulder. "Kayne!" I shook him violently.  
He turned over, eyes closed and lids quivering. His chest was heaving and his lips were parted ever so slightly, but it was a frightening sight. I had never seen someone look so absolutely white. He was so pale and sickly, with horribly dark circles under his lids.  
"Kayne…" I whispered, pushing a frantic Unfezant back behind me.  
A quiet moan slipped from between his teeth and his face scrunched up slightly in pain before he opened his eyes. I looked down in shock, having expected to see his pale blue colored iris's, and finding nothing but a vast, snow colored expanse there. I blinked in shock, trying to understand. The color from his usual dust-lined hair was gone as well, and to my shock, his freckles—which I had never noticed before—were now white, looking like flecks of snow across the bridge of his nose and over his cheeks.  
If I wasn't so worried about him I would have managed to notice how absolutely stunning he was. That boyish innocence was suddenly gone, replaced with the same mysterious sex appeal that Tate had. The only difference was Tate's was angry and cold like ice.  
Kayne looked soft and tender… like the first dusting of snow on the ground in winter. It was like looking at the way you felt going out to play in it as a child. Tate was the dead of winter, when sheer cold and ice storms were daring to cross you.  
Tears slipped from Kayne's eyes, and rolled down his cheeks. One dripped onto my wrist and it was cold enough to make me flinch.  
"I'm dead." He rasped. "My—my…" his eyes lolled with effort.  
"Shhhn…" I shook my head and whipped my head around to stare at N, who looked traumatized. "We have to do something."  
N just stared, looking like he couldn't understand what was happening. His face wasn't hard like when I talked about Tate, it was soft and sorrow filled.  
"Garchomp…" Kayne croaked. "He tried to attack me."  
I narrowed my eyes in confusion. "N, can't you call a nurse?"  
He just stood there. "But… but they will know about this… they will find you!" the edge to his voice was desperate. He didn't want to leave Kayne in misery, Kayne was the one shadow triad member he liked, but he didn't want to risk me.  
"Don't worry about me…" Kayne seemed to gather his strength and pull himself up. I helped him gently, seeing as though his shoulders were shaking with effort. "I… I will be fine."  
I frowned. "You knew this was going to happen." It suddenly hit me, the short conversation we had a long time ago, when he accidentally told me that he was dying. I had wanted to ask him about it, but got so held up with needing to see N I had forgotten. Guilt gnawed at my chest as he took in quick breaths of air. Every exhale felt like a chilly gust of wind against me.  
N came over and squatted next to us. His face was guilty as well. "I—I didn't… know."  
"Didn't know what?" Kayne seemed to be fighting the pain easier as the seconds ticked by. His white eyes kept rolling back into his head though, and it was hard enough to see the different between iris and the regular white of his eye. He looked somewhat like a demon to me, and somewhat like an angle at the same time. His pupils were a lighter shade, a coal color rather than pitch black.  
N sat and curled his legs up. His hands were limp in his lap and for the first time he didn't look very pasty—in comparison to Kayne of course. "What is this? That happened to you?" he whispered, not meeting his gaze.  
"I died."  
"But how? You are here… you're… talking and breathing…"  
"But my heart isn't… it's…" Kayne was getting all choked up again. He was shivering and looking surprised with himself. His young face was pulled down and his eyes met the floor beneath us. "I guess I'm just a… solid ghost."  
N looked at me pleadingly, wishing there was something I could say to make him feel better.  
"I didn't know that the Shadow Triad was dying…" N insisted. "When I asked for special help… when I wanted you three to work for me… I didn't know you would have to give up your life."  
Kayne looked somewhat sick now, but in a different kind of way. My eyes flickered back and forth between the two guys. Both feeling sorry for each other they looked away, not sure of how to respond.  
"We didn't either…" Kayne finally whispered.  
"I'm not a murderer." N bit his lower lip. "I didn't mean for this to happen… I was lied to."  
"It's ok." Kayne spoke so softly N didn't hear.  
"I'm sorry Kayne!" he begged, his eyes brimming over with moisture. "I—I—  
"It's ok." Kayne answered louder his time, cutting him off mid sentence and bringing his eyes up again. "I knew this day was coming… not when I signed up for this but a while ago I found out."  
"Why didn't you tell me?" I spoke up. "You said once you were dying and then you left."  
"Why should I have told you? So you could feel sorry for me? There's nothing that could change it…"  
"We could have tried… maybe Plasma could have reversed the effects! Maybe you could have been human again…"  
"Plasma wouldn't have done that for me." Kayne sighed.  
N silence was a painful agreement.  
The three of us stared at each other in deep concern, wondering what to do. A few and far between tear fell from Kayne's eyes, only it looked like he wasn't sure how to control it, rather than being seriously upset. IT wasn't until N spoke up that he really got upset again.  
"Why did Garchomp attack you?" he didn't realize the tug on Kayne's heart that would have until it was too late.  
Kayne gritted his teeth together. "While it was happening… it was like he didn't recognize me anymore. Garchomp never liked strangers… and he was treating me like one."  
N studied his face and reflection in his eyes for a long moment. "But… Tate's pokemon are still loyal to him."  
"Tate raises ghost pokemon." I said suddenly. It struck me so quickly I couldn't believe I had never realized it before. Tate, and the rest of the shadow triad for that fact, was dead. Tate had told me once that Bobby didn't raise pokemon anymore, though he never explained why, and Kayne hadn't been dead until now.  
I swallowed hard. "He raises ghost pokemon because he is dead… they must be the only pokemon that understand him."  
My assumption was proven correct by the way all my pokemon were standoffish, while Crypt was inching closer, a sudden magnetic like attraction between him and Kayne.  
Both of their eyes flickered as he came closer, now understanding in his eyes. Kayne frowned, but raised his hand in front of my pokemon.  
"You don't treat me like a stranger." He whispered to my pokemon. "Me and you are the same."  
I watched as his hand stroked the now solid Mismagius in front of him. I watched in surprise, knowing that if I were to raise my hand and try to touch Crypt my fingers would flit right through him.  
A final, cold teardrop fell from Kayne's face. "You're warm…"


	28. Chapter 28

"What are we going to do?" Kayne was asking between sips of the drink I had made him. His hand was shaking as he brought the warm liquid to his lips and took a swig. I had mixed honey and milk and hoped it would give him some energy, but he wasn't all that thrilled. Apparently he was too good to be drinking anything with honey in it.  
"This is pretty awful you know." He added, curling his lip in distaste.  
"You need something substantial." I snorted then sighed. "And I don't know… The only thing I can think of is just breaking out. There is a better chance of us getting caught but with N's Reshiram I can't imagine it's impossible… we would just have to be quick."  
"And where do you plan on going?" Kayne cocked his head to the side in wonder. "You know the whole region has already given into letting their pokemon go… do you really think freeing N is going to change anything?"  
"That's not the initial point." I bit the inside of my cheek, knowing he was right. "And we aren't just freeing N, we are stopping team Plasma as well."  
He looked at me like I was crazy. "And you plan to do that…?"  
"I can defeat Ghetsis… and the other sages."  
"No you can't." Kayne shook his head. "Touko you defeated N last time, and your pokemon were completely wiped out. You wouldn't have won against one Sage, let alone all of them."  
I looked half heartedly tours N, who was sitting at my side playing with my fingertips lightly. He didn't meet my gaze and didn't answer. We both knew Kayne was right, but no one wanted to believe we couldn't do it on our own. How many more lives would I have to endanger?  
"Cheren will help us…" I assumed, though thinking about it… I hadn't talked to Cheren in so long he could be supporting Plasma by now and I wouldn't even know it. Would he want to be a part of this war after being locked up for so long because of a battle? I knew locking Cheren up would only anger him even more… and that was enough to give me hope.  
N's eyes came up. "We don't know where Cheren is." He reminded calmly.  
"Well I can guarantee it was Tate who rescued him." Kayne said suddenly. "He had been talking about it for a while, even before Touko got thrown out the window."  
N flinched, but I was happy Kayne was treating it like an everyday memory and nothing more. No one had a right to fuss over me so much.  
"Do you think Tate knows you are here?" I asked suddenly, fear rising in my throat. "You said he could tell where you were…"  
Kayne shrugged. "I think if he knew he would have come here by now."  
My mind whirled as I remembered the days I spent with Tate here in this very room. Something tugged on my heart and I had to pull my hand away from N, to wallow in my own guilt for a fraction of a second. Tate and I were friends… maybe even best friends at one point… and now I was hiding from him. What happened to us?  
I looked across the room to the royal blue sofa facing the far window and remembered the day he first brought Kayne here to meet me. He had lain on that couch with his head in my lap telling me all about the situation with Bobby and how he was stuck watching after his youngest brother.  
Did I miss that? Did I miss… him?  
N was looking at me with hurt eyes, reflecting my own sadness. He blinked when I reluctantly placed my hand back in his and I knew he didn't understand. I didn't understand either.  
Tate got me thrown out a window. I knew that wasn't his motive but it was still true… how could I forgive him so easily?  
I bit my lip.  
N got my very first pokemon killed and I forgave him after just a couple weeks… So it wasn't fair to say that I wasn't the forgiving type.  
"We have to talk to Tate." I decided with a sudden burst of determination.  
"What!" N jolted up and stared wide-eyed at me. "No!"  
Kayne was smirking in a nervous kind of way. He and his brother never got along but they loved each other just the same. I figured Kayne would be more than happy to have his ally once again.  
"Tate is going to kill me." He rolled his white eyes and laughed a hard laugh. "But I was thinking the same thing."  
I nodded at N. "Tate serves me now… He will have to listen and at least give us a chance to explain."  
"Tate hates me!" N worried. "He won't listen if it has to do with me." I didn't miss the flash of fear across his face. N was afraid of Tate?  
"N, I know it's not what you want to hear, but Tate was my friend… and I think we need to clear things up with him. I think you need to."  
N pouted.  
"And not to mention Tate is the most powerful out of the three shadow triad members. He's clever and devious." Kayne's eyes showed signs of respect for his brother. "Knowing him he already has thought of a way to destroy Team Plasma for all its worth."  
"Touko please…" N frowned at both of us.  
"We need to try."  
"I think it's worth a shot." Kayne spoke simply. "Besides, if we are going to defeat all of the sages we are going to need more pokemon help. Tate has the strongest ghost pokemon I have ever seen."  
"My Chandelure is plenty strong if we need a ghost type." N muttered under his breath.  
Kayne rolled his eyes. "What wouldn't I give to have my Garchomp back…" his face fell a bit and I saw the same flash of pain that he held earlier. "We would be able to destroy everyone."  
I would have told him not to be so arrogant if it wasn't for the fact that he was honestly upset. His Garchomp meant everything to him.  
"Maybe we could find him for you?" I suggested. "After we defeat Plasma and know it's safe to travel."  
There was a glitter of hope for a second but he pushed it away quickly. "Garchomp won't obey me even if we could find him again. He won't want anything to do with me… now that I'm dead." The last word stuck like a barb on his tongue.  
"Even if you re-capture him?" I looked at N, hoping he would have an explanation for why the pokemon became disloyal so fast. Kayne didn't look THAT different… and nothing changed in his personality.  
"I would have to ask Tate…" Kayne's eyes narrowed. "He wouldn't ever tell me about dying before, so it's the least he could do now."  
"You don't seem very worried about your Garchomp." N commented suddenly, his face growing skeptical.  
Kayne shrugged. "That's the strongest pokemon I have ever raised… He is second next in line to being indestructible. Why should I worry?"  
I wanted to slap him and tell him that pokemon weren't just about being ok physically, but I envied his strength. I was a wreck when I didn't know where my pokemon were or how they were being treated. I guess when you have enough faith in your partner's strength worry takes a back seat to anger; because Kayne suddenly looked pissed.  
"If I wasn't dying, literally, at the time I would have taught him whose master."  
N shuddered and lightening flashed in his green eyes. "You wouldn't hurt your pokemon." The ancient memories of pokemon abuse flooded his face and I was shocked to see such passion after not seeing it for so long.  
"I wouldn't hurt him." Kayne rolled his eyes. "I would just make sure he knew who was boss."  
N didn't look convinced. I was trying to picture Kayne standing up to his Garchomp and demanded it to obey him. To my surprise all I could picture was Tate's demanding exterior. Kayne wasn't nearly as forceful as his strongest brother, and I knew that perhaps too much of Tate had worn off on him.  
"It doesn't matter right now anyways." I flicked my hand to change the subject. "You do realize that we have an escape mission to get started on right?"  
The two boys nodded solemnly at me, Kayne smirking and N scowling while I slid my legs off the edge of the bed and snatched up my pokeballs. I curled my hand around Unfezant's and called him out. N had reached for his pure white pokeball around his belt and was holding Reshiram in his lap, his fingers trembling around our one way out.  
Kayne slid the glass of honey milk across the dresser and jumped upright, looking energized and ready to go. His snowy eyes glittered like new frost on a frozen lake and I had to feed off of his determination in order to take N's hand.  
"Are you ready?" I said breathlessly to him as he handed me my backpack. Unfezant fluffed out his wings and made an eager cooing noise.  
"Your look out ok?" I put my hand on the top of his head and he gave me a curt nod. "If you see anything coming from below us, or fallowing us while we escape you come tell us."  
He ruffled his feathers in response.  
Squeezing N's hand I took a deep breath. Kayne was on my other side, wild eyed and ready to break out. This wouldn't be his first time.  
"Ready…" N whispered brining up the pure white pokeball.  
"Go Reshiram!"


	29. Chapter 29

N might as well have called Hell out of that pokeball. Fire shot across the room like a flamethrower and a screeching howl cut through the air, making my hands fly to my ears. Reshiram stretched her wings wide making the pretty spiral staircase collapse and shatter like a piece of glass. Her neck stretched up and she had to hunch over to fit before N's room above blocked the way.  
"Shhh!" N raised his arms to the legendary pokemon who turned her ocean blue eyes on him. They flickered in discomfort as the ceiling began to crumble around her. The floor groaned with effort and I noticed a beam to the far left, supporting the Swanna statues by the fountain, was snapping.  
The lights were flickering, the alarms going on an off, wailing with effort as a blinding red light flashed above. Kayne's triumphant wail sounded above the roar and even N managed a smile, unable to hold back his excitement.  
We were going to be free!  
Reshiram, fed up with the lack of space, turned and blasted a gaping hole in the wall with the largest window. The hot summer sun poured in and made the flames lick the walls like hungry beasts.  
"Unfezant!" I yelled as N hauled himself onto Reshiram's shoulders. The alarms were getting louder, and the angry, buzzing speakers were announcing something above out heads.  
"Hurry!" N reached down to grab my hand. I latched onto a fistful of Reshiram's long thick fur and he helped me up with little effort.  
"Kayne?" I yelled wrapping my arms around N's back. "Unfezant!"  
Suddenly a blur of gray and green feathers flashed in front of us and Unfezant dove for the hole leading to the outside world. His terrified call faded and I hoped he wasn't so scared as to forget his job.  
Don't let me down now, I chanted.  
Kayne jumped up onto Reshiram with not a heartbeat to spare. She was turned with half her body stretched out of the wall, her tail engine glowing a vibrant bed and making my shoulders burn with the strength of ten suns. My skin was fizzing until Kayne pressed his cold bloodless body to me and held on tight.  
"PRISINOR ESCAPE! PRISINOR ESCAPE!" the alarms wailed louder as the castle floor trembled like an earthquake.  
"Over the mountains! South!" N commanded to the legendary pokemon, who flapped her giant wings twice before launching herself, lopsided from the floor and into the mid-day heat.  
The sound of gun shots behind us made me flinch and I scanned the area for Unfezant with a sinking feeling. If there was anything I taught that pokemon about stealth it was to use its speed above anything else. He would be fine… he was strong and careful. Still, I couldn't find him in the sky anywhere.  
I turned and looked back past Kayne to the castle behind me, having never seen it from outside before. Window after window after window was stacked in lines showing every floor of the monstrous sized building. There was a terribly tall iron fence surrounding the thing, and billowing clouds of smoke shrouding up into the sky from what I could only guess were kitchens throughout it.  
A violent flapping sounded beside me. "Unfezant!" I turned, expecting to see my pokemon and finding something completely different.  
"Touko!" N shouted as I was struck by an impossibly strong force. Under a layer of white feathers was firm muscles, strong enough to knock my arms free from N's waist. I heard his wild frantic gasp as I slipped off Reshiram's back and scrambled at her side for anything to grasp. My life flashed before my eyes as hot blood oozed from my side where the Braviary's talons had clawed me.  
"I got her!" Kayne howled, making me realize that his hands were gripping my wrist with all his might.  
"I'm slipping!" I cried as the Braviary hurtled tours me for one more striking blow. They wanted me to die… it was the only explanation why this Plasma pokemon was after me and no one else.  
"NO!" N turned and risked his grip in Reshiram to try and grab me. My hand slipped from Kayne's too soon though, and I slid down Reshiram's solid stomach into the air, Braviary missed me by a hair and clipped Reshiram's foot on the way down, but it was the least of my worries.  
I screamed in horror, knowing that I couldn't possibly live through two falls like this. My arms flailed, my hair slapped me in the face, and my eyes watered against the wind as the forest floor approached me at a terrifyingly fast pace.  
Let N be free…  
It was the final thought that crossed my mind before I lost all the air in my chest and my scream cut off into a choking gasp. I could feel myself trembling, prepared to die for the second time in my life.  
Mienshao's wail echoed in my head, but was echoed by Unfezant's screech of warning. My eyes flashed open for a fraction of a second before I was hit hard by something under me. The wind was knocked from my chest almost as soon as I had begun to recover it, and I dug my fingernails into the mass falling with me.  
We started to slow, the ground taking its time now as it approached us, but we were still falling.  
Unfezant wailed, trying to find the wind, trying to flap his wings with my weight dragging him down.  
"Come on Unfezant!" I rasped, releasing the hold on his shoulders and sliding back. I found myself clutching under his stomach and my face hidden between his wings. They tucked in for a second, making us spiral downward fast once again. My squeezed my eyes shut, about ready to jump and save Unfezant from this death as well.  
Then his winds unfolded and stretched into the wind. Like a parachute we were launched upward and all the strength in my arms lifted as Unfezant determinedly dragged my weight through the air tours an approaching Reshiram. Wide eyed with terror I saw the legendary approach.  
"Touko!" N swallowed his fear and reached tours me, his arm stretching across the space between Reshiram and Unfezant.  
I crawled slightly further up Unfezant's back and reached out, my fingertips shaking with effort.  
"Just a little further!" Kayne directed Reshiram, now sitting in the drivers seat on her neck.  
Unfezant's wings collided with Reshiram's for a terrifying second before he disappeared beneath me, his strength decreasing quickly. I clutched N's hand and he yanked me up to him in no time at all. Panting I turned and buried my face into his chest.  
"No time for reunions!" Kayne hissed back at us. "We have company!"  
The Braviary dove back and fourth under Reshiram, daring to come to close. N clutched me even tighter, refusing to let me slip away again. But it didn't seem to have me in mind this time.  
"Unfezant!" I gasped as the much larger bird bowled into his side and sent his spiraling to the floor. I fumbled for his pokeball, ready to call him back if necessary, but he was a fighter, that's for sure.  
My pokemon, the third one I raised and the very first pokemon I had ever caught on my own, opened his wings again and dove through the air in swooping strokes. His shape appeared back in my sight within a moment and I could see the Braviary preparing to attack again.  
"Archeops!" N shamelessly launched another pokeball into the air. His rock flying type exploded in a fit of rage and battered the air furiously in shock, eyes blazing. I remembered having Samorott defeat this pokemon so long ago. It was wild and almost uncontrollable, but that made it fearless and powerful.  
This bird type was the complete opposite of mine. He hurtled his rock hard body through the air and rammed the Braviary before it could ram my Unfezant. This turned into a sky fight instantly, and as we made our sweet escape the three bird types fell further and further behind.  
"Turn her around!" I commanded. "We have to make sure Unfezant and Archeops are ok!"  
N didn't argue and Kayne started directing the huge pokemon in a long circle to be facing the castle, which was just a dot in the distance. Two shapes flapped by, heading straight tours us. I crossed my fingers, praying that Unfezant, who was weak from saving me, hadn't fallen yet.  
I pulled my pokeball up and squirmed from N until I had a clear shot. I aim at the two flying shapes and held my breath.  
A red beam cut through the air and I breathed a sight of relief as one of the flying shapes was sucked back into my pokeball.  
N called Archeops back as well and then the two of us turned and settled tight onto Reshiram, scanning the area for any other attackers. Everything was growing quieter, making the sky turn into a peaceful wonderland instead of a battle zone. Finally I looked up at N, finding his green eyes smiling hugely, victorious.  
"We did it." he whispered.

A very nauseous Kayne was clinging to my back, groaning with discomfort as we approached the town closest to mine. Reshiram was descending slowly, her tale engine flickering and leaving a trail of black smoke behind us.  
"We're almost there." I called back to him, my thighs tightening around N. I had spent at least twenty minutes braiding the length of his hair and now that I was reaching the ends I realized that we hadn't been flying as long as I expected. We didn't feel like we were moving all that fast either, it was too much like being in an airplane. I didn't understand why Kayne was the motion sickness type, what with his teleporting abilities.  
"See that little bunch of houses?" I pointed, trying to distract him from puking all over me.  
He nodded, his breath hot on the back my neck. "Nuvema, I know."  
I had forgotten that he had been to my town already, to talk to me. I turned my attention back to N. "Do you see it?"  
"Yes, but my grunts never said it was so small!" He shook his hair, making pieces of come loose from the braid. "I wouldn't have assigned so many to invade the town…"  
I flinched. "You sound like you are happy with the results!"  
He glanced back at me, a small smile playing on his lips. "Sorry. I'm not… I just didn't realize that you came from a town consisting of five houses."  
"And a local market!" I challenged as Reshiram neared the tree tops, her tail completely out now so she wouldn't start a forest fire. Things seemed to speed up for the last and final moment of our ride, and I realized that I would be facing my mother very shortly.  
I had been dreading this moment almost as soon as we took off, and it wasn't getting any easier. She would be livid… if she wasn't already gone looking for me. Would Professor Juniper be there with my mother? Would they be best friends again and care about each other like they used to? Or would my mother blame the Professor for my escape?  
I was sure poor Bianca was still stationed with her parents, unable to leave her own little protected bubble, but it dawned on me that Cheren may have come back. If Kayne was right and his brother had rescued him then surely they would have come back to Nuvema town. Hope flared in my chest as well as terror. Would Cheren realize how long I put off his rescue for my own selfishness?  
I swallowed the lump rising in my throat as Reshiram landed just outside the small town, in a meadow filled with grass and short thick leaved trees. There was just enough room for her to stretch out her wings and let us scuffle down to the ground. My thighs hurt as if I had been riding a Zebstrika or Ponyta all afternoon, and the burnt skin from her tail engine was feeling somewhat tender against the long grass. Why hadn't I worn jeans?  
N scrambled down after me and smiled, his green eyes matching the green of the trees. Something in his eyes told me he was waiting a very long time for this… to feel like he was free at last. The last time N had even been out of that terrible castle was the day we went to Nimbasa together. I hadn't realized that my measly month—give or take some time—didn't compare to the years he spent locked away being used by his own father to take over the Region.  
Kayne stretched and cracked his back, having been the closest to the tail engine his skin was cherry red and he looked very sickly covered in sweat. Between the summer sun and the heat of Reshiram's body I could only imagine the way he felt. I wasn't surprised when he stumbled away into a mass of shrubs and vomited violently.  
I flinched and turned to see N, as peaceful as ever, completely unfazed by the whole journey, call his legendary back into her pure white pokeball. Her blue eyes sparkled before she disappeared.  
"Right…" Kayne groaned, wiping his mouth with the back of his hand and walking back over to us. "What's the plan?"  
"Oh there is a plan now?" A chilly voice slipped through the trees and whispered into the clearing. The three of us turned in shock, looking in all different directions to try and find Tate. It was his voice, no doubt, but he was no where to be found.  
"Tate!" I swallowed hard and forced myself to stand straighter up. "We want to talk to you… We want to explain."  
"I'm not talking to either of those two." His voice was hard and his response was fast. It was the way he spoke when he knew he wouldn't be swayed, regardless of who said what. He was furious.  
"Me?" I suggested.  
"Of course."  
"Where are you?"  
"Come into the trees." he called icily calm.  
N clutched my arm before I could make any move. I could feel the intensity in his grip and I knew that I was going to have to assure him I would be fine. His mouth was parted slightly in a silent plea.  
"Don't worry… Just stay here…" I bit my lip, knowing that there wasn't a way around this. Tate always won… he was a cheater to begin with, but he always won. I flashed Kayne a sorry look and began to wad slowly through the long grass to the far side of the meadow. His voice was clearest in this direction but I couldn't see him yet.  
The dark shade of the trees shadowed my face as I peered into the undercover. Thick air filled my lungs, sickly sweet with the smell of foliage. N and Kayne were watching my every step.  
I forced myself to remember the days when me and Tate had been something. Friends…  
"Tate…" I whispered into the trees. The whole world seemed to mend itself around those tree trunks and branches. Even the few pokemon chirping away happily seemed to stop.  
"Tate…" I repeated. "I'm sorry…"  
And then he hit me.  
Not in the literal sense of course, but the force of his landing having just teleported, made the wind push straight up out of my chest. I gasped as his cold arms wound around my back and his chin settled on my shoulder. He was hugging me in an angry kind of way. I stiffened and stayed perfectly still, aware of the fact that my fingertips were twitching in response.  
He pressed the side of his face to my neck and I could feel every muscle just roll back lazily into a hopeless lapse of emotion. He shook for a second, not answering me, and not breathing. There was no heart thudding in his chest and I realized that all those times I thought something was different about him and couldn't figure it out, it was this.  
Tate was dead.  
Just like Kayne, Tate had his life taken from him a long time ago when he signed up with team Plasma. I wasn't sure when his heart had stopped beating completely, because he sure never acted like Kayne did, but I knew that at some point it happened.  
I could also feel all the hurt, all those blocked emotions he never let anyone see just come rushing out of him. My heart seemed to roar in my ears and I couldn't bring myself to understand why I never noticed this about him before. It was like suddenly the piece of Tate that was always missing was there, calling out to me.  
I'm hurt… I'm guilty… I'm lost…  
The unresponsive part of me snapped and my hands came up, my fingers knotted in his wind blown hair and I hugged him back twice as hard as he hugged me. The iciness of his chest made me shiver and the cool air pushing its way out of his mouth tickled the strands of hair on my neck.  
"Why the Hell did you leave?" Tate sighed after a long moment. I could tell it took a lot of work to put those words into action and not sound angry. He was trying at least…  
For me…  
"I… I love N." I whispered. How could I deny that? It wasn't possible… and I was convinced that Tate needed to know the truth. "I promised him I would protect him… I had to… to go back."  
"So you used my brother?" Tate snorted and pulled back to look at me. His face was more stunning that I remembered it. A freckle-less Kayne with more definition along his jaw and brow. "What a cheap shot."  
I shook my head, getting lost in the silver depths of his eyes. He was… sad. No matter how hard he wanted to hide it. Regret shadowed his face like a ghost pokemon ready to pounce on its next victim.  
Something seemed to trip up my heart. I had MISSED this disobedient boy. I hadn't realized it until now…  
"And you don't love me?" Tate asked his voice more tender than I had ever heard it before.  
Some foreign guilt gnawed at my heart and my lower lip quivered. How could I do this to him? How could I hurt him like this? A single tear rolled down my cheek, but I forced myself to shake my head.  
"No…"  
Tate, in his entire attempt to be sincere, just couldn't hold on any longer. The pain escalated across his face and was replaced in a silent heartbeat by a wicked smile. A fraud. Tate was in pain and the only way he could control it was with a bone-chilling attitude.  
"I'll just try harder then." His voice was icy again… too slick.  
I shuddered.


	30. Chapter 30

~Tate~

It was about fucking time. A little peace and quiet around here while Touko took her posse down the street to see Cheren.  
The furious friend that I had rescued. You know… the one that no one gave me credit for? I had been shocked by one of those damn things Plasma liked to stick into your sides. It felt like lightening, but it wasn't the worst pain I had ever felt.  
Poor, poor Cheren was getting all the love in the world while I stayed back with Touko's mom, trying to figure out why my own brother betrayed me. Kayne knew I felt absolutely wretched about what happened, and I would snap his neck if he it hadn't have worked out in my favor.  
After all… Touko came back on her own. Sure my little brother drove me crazy, but for her return I owed him big time. I also owed him an apology. I had to tell him I was sorry for not warning him about dying as a Shadow triad member. I needed to tell him that it was only because Bobby and I had been trying to preserve his human life as long as possible.  
I wasn't sure where Kayne had run off to, but he wasn't thrilled to stick around and hear Touko's mom cuss her out and nearly slap N. I enjoyed it, but hey… that's just me.  
I was happy she took that sad sack to Cheren's to "Clear the air" and left me alone. Not that I didn't want to be with her, but if I had to watch her touch him one more time I would be doing much more than just slapping the king. I hoped Cheren was still furious enough unleash some kick ass on him for me.  
I was debating with myself, trying to decide if it would be worth it to just tell Touko straight up about mine and N's former quarrel. He never liked me to begin with, and he was determined to have his grunts possess me with their life taking promises. I was a stupid kid at the time… I didn't know any better. All I knew was that I wanted to be a trainer. Him and his followers promised me that and then took it away from me.  
The night I had "died" all my pokemon turned on me. One by one they broke from their pokeballs, fearing from the cold air and the stranger I was becoming. Even my very first pokemon, which was a Dieno on the verge of evolving, had become enraged. He had nearly killed me with an attack. I couldn't even try to defend myself either, because Dieno was blind and couldn't see that it was still me.  
He knew something was different and he thought I was something else… so he attacked me and I had the scars to prove it.  
My other pokemon had just run away. All of them except for my Gengar. He was a Haunter at the time and he just stared at me like it was for his life. I spent the night in Castalia City, lying in the greasy corner behind a dumpster with a ghost pokemon staring down at me. Until that night Haunter had never obeyed me.  
I thought at first it might have been because he was foreign, and maybe he didn't understand my commands. I was wrong… he just didn't obey me because we were too different. Once I died me and him were exactly the same. He evolved very soon after that night as well. We have been together ever since.  
I found that I could capture ghost pokemon and make them obey me with ease, but I never wanted to go back to the sloppy ways of my young training days. I made Gengar the most powerful ghost pokemon he could be before even catching Froslass.  
She was just perfect. My baby girl in a way. I wasn't afraid to admit that I had a soft spot for her, so soft that I didn't make her train critically like I did to Gengar. I knew the icy pokemon loved me more than anything else in the world. Sometimes I even thought that she was IN love with me.  
I laughed once thinking about this, and looked across the room to where she was floating above the airvent in the floor. She looked up at me with her clear, piercing blue eyes and tilted her head down in a flirtatious kind of way.  
The radio was playing softly from the giant T.V shelf and bookcase across from me, and I recognized the country song with a jolt of embarrassment. I was a pretty musical person; I had a band with some long lost friends when I was only thirteen. I played guitar and I spent my most pleasant days singing to songs like this on the front porch of my house.  
Know one ever took me for the old fashioned country boy, but had you seen me before I joined team Plasma you would understand. Once upon a million years ago, it seemed, I had sand colored hair and light green eyes.  
I wallowed in the song that brought me back to my life before I died and went to living Hell. My stomach twisted in a way I couldn't explain. It was the kind of way I felt when I wanted to be mad at Froslass but she was just too damn adorable.  
Speaking of which, she came over to me raising her small human like hands to me and smiling a wide smile. Her eyes glittered like diamonds and she blushed.  
I rolled my eyes at her and looked around the room, seeing that no one was around before standing and taking her little hand in mine. The two of us used to dance to songs just for fun when we had nothing going on. Bobby would always make fun of me and say I might as well be having sex with her too. He never cared much for pokemon like me and Kayne did, so I didn't let his sarcasm bother me.  
It felt weird but natural to dance with Froslass. She was graceful and careful with every twirl and invisible step she took. I couldn't describe the relationship I had with her, but this was a pretty good way to prove it was more like a father-daughter situation than a trainer-pokemon one.  
I spun her and laughed the laugh that I only did when I was alone with my pokemon. Despite the havoc going on in my heart over Touko and the desperate loathing that was scratching up the back of my throat for N… things seemed to be pretty normal again.  
I started humming along to the song first, closing my eyes as Froslass sang her purest note. She remembered the song too.  
Words started to slip from between my lips and before I knew it I was twirling her around the room and forgetting all about everything. My heart was thudding quickly, and I had to admit, if it wasn't for the fact that her little hand was FREEZING, I would have sworn she turned into Touko.  
That's what I wanted right now… Touko…  
"Tate?"  
I smiled. Her voice was clear as day in my head.  
"Tate!" she squawked, bringing me out of my fantasy world. I released Froslass's hand, sending her flying across the room and whirling right into the girl I dreamed about. My face must have turned cherry ass red.  
"Touko!" I gasped, seeing N glaring down at me from behind her. My defenses arose instantly and I gritted my teeth together.  
Why?  
Why did he have to be here!  
I stepped back from Touko and turned, shoulders stiff to go pick a very furious Froslass up off the floor. She turned and glared at me, having hit the garbage can and it tipping over on her. I would have laughed at her expression, if I wasn't so pissed off that N was here, ruining my time.  
She made an angry, ice squealing against ice- kind of noise and I winced. "Oh stop!"  
She pouted and turned away from me, floating to the staircase and climbing it with prickling irritation. I assumed she was going back to her pokeball that was in the extra bedroom, hidden in the drawer. I rolled my eyes.  
"Were… were you dancing?" Touko was fighting back laughter. Her dark blue eyes danced with humor. I would have loved it if N wasn't there, holding her hand like he was the only one in this world that loved her.  
I glared at the two of them. "Yeah. So what?"  
"With your pokemon?" N said softly.  
I didn't answer him, just folded my arms across my chest and took a harsh breath. Nothing good would come from breaking N's nose, but I wanted to so badly.  
"She was enjoying that." N added. "Froslass was very happy."  
I snorted. "Yeah, why do you think I was doing it?"  
Touko was smiling at me, her hand twitching in N's. "And singing?" she teased in a poor attempt to make this ok.  
"You could have knocked." I hissed.  
"This is my house!" she threw her arms up with a huff. Nothing could have ruined her good mood right now, and I wanted to spit knowing that Cheren had most likely forgiven the king. I'm sure they had a nice pity-party going on over there.  
I turned my back to them and headed around to the other side of the island in the middle of the large open kitchen.  
"I think Froslass was mad at you." I heard N whisper to Touko as she tried to pull away from him. That was another thing I hated.  
Every time Touko wanted to come near me N gave her this warning tug like she had to be reminded of what I did. As if I had to be reminded…  
I wasn't perfect; I knew that. I was far from it actually. Quite frankly, it was a damn good thing I was already dead because if I was still a fragile human I would have to suffer the inevitable fate of Hell in my afterlife. There was no way Heaven would be taking someone like me.  
Touko ignored N and came into the kitchen, leaving him standing a little ways off looking like a lost lilipup. I watched as Touko opened her fridge and pulled out a bottle of chocolate syrup and milk.  
She still stunned me. Every day of my life, the little things she did just managed to catch me off guard. Here she was, the strongest trainer, the bravest, the only person willing to stand up to team Plasma… making chocolate milk.  
I watched as she swirled a spoon in the milk, the metal clinked awkwardly against the glass as our eyes met. I didn't break away like one might have, I stared back, forgetting about N and imagining her loving me and only me. My stomach fluttered in that strange way before anger flared back up and ate away at the feeling.  
She ignored my silent questions and the determination on my face, and turned to put away the milk and syrup. I smirked as her back was turned to me and reached across the island. I slid the glass over to me and leaned against the counter with it in my hand until she turned to look back.  
I loved the way she glared. And I loved that I had the ability to drive her absolutely crazy just with a flick of my eyebrow. Her face turned red with anger as I took a sip of her milk and then slid the glass back over to her professionally.  
I heard a low groaning in the back of her throat as I walked past her. I snagged a killer look at N as I passed the living room and headed for the stair case. He looked confused, lost because of our silent conversation. But the jealousy was raging in his eyes. I flashed him an evil smile.  
"Good night, Touko." I called back softly, my voice alluring.  
My eyes never left N's as I spoke.

~Tate~

Someone wouldn't stop snoring in the middle of the night and it was very hard to stay asleep. I assumed it was Touko's mother, because no one else could snare loud enough to pierce through two walls but her. I couldn't help but hope it was N that made such an unattractive noise though.  
Either way, I couldn't sleep. I crawled off of the stiff underused bed that I had been staying in lately, and slinked over to the open window. Warm summer air was blowing through the screen in heavy wafts and the strikingly white moon gave off enough light for me to fumble around in the dark and find a pair of sweats. I slipped them on over my boxers and snatched Gengar and Froslass's pokeballs from the ancient dresser drawer.  
The world was asleep around me as I concentrated and brought my attention to Touko's bedroom. I blinked once before teleporting into the room just across from mine. Why open creaky doors when you didn't have to? I landed soft as a feather on her wood floor and stepped lightly to her bedside.  
She was sleeping silently, her face peacefully calm and unbelievably beautiful. I had never seen her look so innocent before and it struck me right in the chest. Damn I loved that girl.  
I might have wanted to stay and watch her sleep for an hour or so, but I was much too eager to settle a score I had been dying to since I met this girl. I reached down and put my hand on her shoulder, over her thick comforter.  
"Touko." I said quickly in a harsh whisper. I shook her ever so slightly.  
Suddenly she jolted upright with shock. She gasped and I saw sheer terror cross her face for a split second. All her senses must have come back slowly, because she didn't seem to recognize me or where she was for a couple seconds. She blinked once her eyes adjusted to the moonlight and looked up at me with a flustered expression.  
"Tate, what do you want?"  
I loomed over her so that I could see her pupils clearly. She looked me straight in the eyes and I had to fight back a creeping smile.  
"Let's have a battle."


	31. Chapter 31

"You're crazy." I said, though I wasn't sure if I meant it or not. Me and Tate hadn't exactly been on the same page since I came back, and he was infuriating me beyond belief. I got the feeling it was on purpose to, which only made things worse.  
Even so, I couldn't help but think about hugging him the other day, when I first showed up and he found me out in the meadow with N and his brother Kayne. He looked so hurt and raw. The shield of emotions he put up didn't mask the intensity of how he was feeling in that moment.  
And not only that, but I had caught him being completely sincere just a few hours or so ago. I had been at Cheren's house with N, making amends and pleading with Professor Juniper, who I knew would understand over anyone else. N was innocent, it was team Plasma who had to lose this fight, not him.  
We had spent quite some time arguing, and no one would listen to me at first, they just wanted to hear N speak… to bask in the glory of the once powerful team Plasma king. To them, seeing him basically hide behind my words was like seeing him defeated. It made me angry, but even I had to admit that was better than them not trusting him at all.  
Everyone except Cheren seemed to be willing to listen. While we made progress he just stood in the background, looking at his feet, not speaking his mind like he usually did. The hate on his face was almost as prudent as it was on Tate's, whenever N was around.  
Cheren had been treated somewhat normally down in the basement of the Plasma Castle, but he was alone, except for the accompaniment of three grunts, two being the couple that N caught kissing in the hallway so long ago. I knew Cheren wasn't one to give up, but they took the one thing that made him who he was away from him. Cheren was nothing without his pokemon…  
I tried to talk to him; I tried to tell him that we would get revenge for his pokemon. I had tried very hard to get him to understand that I knew how he felt, but he made it very clear our friendship was gone. The boy next door that I grew up with my whole life hated me because I was forced to tell him the truth about having gotten my pokemon back. I was forced to tell Cheren that despite being held against my own will, I had been living in paradise for some time.  
Paradise only because N was there with me… but still paradise. That fact made Cheren hate me almost as much as N. And I couldn't blame him either. It hurt to know that my whole life was falling apart around me because of my feelings for the fallen king.  
I was working myself up over all this that I forgot to remember the good that had come from our meeting yesterday. My mother and me made a very strong attempt at amends as well, and we did succeed. We were on the same page once again, and she was convinced now that with N on our side we could win this fight. Professor Juniper took a little more time to come around, but she ended up thinking the same way.  
Poor Bianca was determined like always, but her family just hated everything that had to do with her being in danger. I had decided that I wouldn't leave her out again, regardless of what her parents had to say. She would be by mine and N's side come time to battle…  
I wanted so desperately for Cheren to be there too… but he didn't even have pokemon anymore, and professor Juniper had no way of getting him even one to start training because of the effect N's words had on Unova. The whole region stopped training and catching pokemon, expect for very few skillful trainers able to hide it.  
"I'm not crazy." Tate retorted, bringing me back to reality. "You are the one who has been putting this off."  
We walked through the shadow filled trees, back to that sheltered meadow outside of my small town. I could hear pokemon scuffling about in the darkness, and the warm air brought with it the smell of the ocean.  
"I have been kind of busy if you haven't noticed." I muttered, clutching the belt of pokeballs I had around my waist. I felt like if I let go someone would snatch it right off of me. I didn't want to lose my pokemon again.  
Tate smiled at me, his mood too good. I remembered with a flash where my thoughts had originally been headed. To Tate dancing with his Froslass, the most beautiful and graceful pokemon I had ever seen. I had walked in on him and found it simply adorable. Of course Tate would never have admitted it, but I could see lightness in his face. All his defenses had been down.  
"Alright, maybe you are right. You have been busy." Tate allowed, for once, and agreed with me. "But seriously when is the last time you had a battle?"  
I flinched. "Not since…"  
"Since you lost your Mienshao." Tate nodded to himself. "You need this."  
I glowered, thought the urge for battle stung in my fingertips like needles. I did need this; I needed to just let loose and fight with all my might. I was happy it would be against Tate too, he deserved a good knock off his pedestal. The boy was so cocky.  
"Why do you want to battle me?" I asked suddenly as we approached the meadow. I hoped it would be far enough away from anyone so that we couldn't be heard.  
"Why wouldn't I?" he huffed. "You are one of the strongest trainers I have ever seen."  
"You should be scared." I teased with an edge in my voice. "We have a lot of stored up energy."  
"And I have a lot of reasons to win this battle." Tate's perfectly white teeth flashed in the moonlight. "You have never seen me battle before. So how can you know what to expect?"  
"I have battled every kind of trainer Tate." I rolled my eyes. "You don't honestly think you are going to beat me?"  
"You are very sure of yourself." He stopped walking and turned his silver, penetrating eyes on me. "Let's make a bet."  
"What?"  
"Yeah if—  
"No." I scowled.  
Tate crossed his arms over his muscled chest—why hadn't he worn a shirt?—and his smile faltered. "So you're scared you are going to lose?"  
"No!" I balled my hands up into fists. "I just know that nothing you could bet me would do me any good." I didn't want to admit it, but part of me was afraid I would lose. Because losing to Tate would be a HUGE downgrade. And he was right when he said I didn't know how he battled.  
I had never battled a ghost specialist before…  
"Then bet me." He leaned close to me, and his face turned very soft suddenly. All the intensity was lost with the lulling breeze. "If I win I want one day… twenty four hours, just me and you."  
I thought about the precious time that day would waste and shook my head. "Tate that's irrational."  
"And if you win…" he took a deep breath. "I will help you defeat team Plasma."  
My eyes widened. "You're lying." Tate's expertise on the castle and his strength would be a huge benefit to our battle. If there was anyone in the world that I could ask for help on this mission it would be him. Desire to accept tugged at my chest.  
"I swear." Tate held both his hands up to me, putting one over his heart. His silver eyes seemed to glow. "I will help you."  
I took a deep breath. "And if I lose I have to spend time with you?" the idea should have bothered me more than it did, but instead I was curious to know what he could possibly want to do for twenty four hours.  
"One day." He nodded.  
I sighed. "Ok."  
He smiled and held his hand out to me. "Deal?"  
I took it as tightly as I could, but his long, cold fingers made me feel small. I nodded. "Alright fine… it's a deal."

…

"Froslass!" Tate threw her pokeball out first, letting the pokemon with impeccable grace dance onto our battlefield. She made a squealing noise, which was strangely beautiful.  
I would have liked to ogle at the beauty of this pokemon, but it would have been too obvious. I reached down, having already decided that if he used Froslass I would start with Scrafty.  
This was a two on two battle considering he only had two pokemon. I didn't see how things could get much fairer than that, so I agreed, though it would have been nice to exercise more of my team.  
"Alright Scrafty… don't let me down." I brought my pokeball up to my chest and closed my eyes. I wanted to tell him how much I loved him and respected him for the pain he went through with losing Mienshao and his unborn child. He was a fighter, and I wanted nothing more for him to keep fighting. Part of me was fighting with the thought that he would be different now though…  
I threw the pokeball and he burst into the clearing, a gush of wind flattening the long grass for a second. "Scrafty use all the dark power you can!" I called. "Sucker punch!"  
He pulled the skin hood up over his head and let it shadow his face from the moon. I could barely make out his shape as he trampled through the grass, purple light glowing from his hands. He ran tours the awaiting, unmoving Froslass and launched his attack with a little strain. I could see he was a little rusty though, in the way he moved.  
Tate raised a single hand, his lips in a tight line, and as if his pokemon had heard the silent command she bolted backward and was merely skimmed by the attack. I swallowed hard, seeing as though she didn't seem to flinch at all.  
Tate never said a word; everything he seemed to do was with his hands and his eyes. Though he did smile wickedly. Anger swelled in my chest. He wasn't even commanding Froslass! He was just letting her fight on her own.  
I realized Tate was right when he said I had never battled a trainer like him before. Froslass, if not both his pokemon knew what to do without commands. I stood in surprise too long, long enough to let my pokemon be battered with a huge lashing of snow and ice.  
"Scrafty!" I gasped as the force of the attack sent him shuddering back to my feet. "Get up! Come on!" I insisted.  
He ground his teeth together and stood on his feet before launching back into the battle. "Use dark pulse!" I called, but I hadn't a clue what Froslass was going to do.  
Without your opponent calling out commands in battle, you would never know what to expect, and that was throwing this whole thing off.  
My Scrafty didn't know many dark attacks, but I was determined to land at least one good hit. I hated that fighting moves wouldn't affect her, and I also hated that I didn't have any other dark types.  
I sighed when Scrafty managed a hit, and then brought my eyes up to Tate's across the meadow. He was still smiling, still smug with himself.  
"Again Scrafty!" I howled with anger.  
Froslass dodged easily this time, dancing away with a whirl of powdered snow. Her dark purple eyes opened wide and I watched in horror as Scrafty was plucked off the ground by a black mass that kicked up out of her shadow. He was launched backwards and I watched him tremble in pain.  
Scrafty was a fighter… but he had brute strength, not tactical strength. "Try again!" I called. Now the fear was growing in me. Would I really lose this battle?  
"Froslass!" Tate called for once, and I expected with hope, to hear the next attack, but nothing came. Scrafty hauled himself up and was about to release another pulsing attack when a blizzard swept through the area, dusting the trees with white flakes and the grass with frost.  
"No!" I stayed planted to the ground as Scrafty fell, fainted into the middle of the clearing. My eyes were wide with shock.  
"Forfeit?" Tate called to me as he returned Froslass to her pokeball. "You look a little shaken."  
"I'm fine!" I tried my best to sound normal, but having to return Scrafty, really was a shot on my pride. Who else could stand up to Gengar? I remembered Tate telling me once that Gengar was his main pokemon and that he was still raising Froslass. So if a pokemon that was still being raised could be strong enough to defeat Scrafty… then who could stand up to Gengar?  
I looked down at my belt. Unfezant would be the least affected by Gengar's abilities, but he was still resting from the battle with the Braviary the other day. Samorott was the most durable, but water wouldn't do too well either. Reuniclus was a definite no. What about Crypt? I unclasped the little pokeball and held it up in the palm of my hand. He was a ghost type too, but I knew it was impossible. I had never even battled once with him.  
I shook my head and snapped the ball back onto my belt. "Don't let me down Samorott." I hissed, wishing I could fight ghost with ghost.  
Tate waited patiently for my pokemon to gather his rippling strength before throwing his next pokemon out onto the soggy field now. The dusting of snow melted almost as fast as it had come and left the grass slippery.  
Samorott roared, his shiny fur sleek in the moonlight. Every tooth in his mouth was sharp, and every giant paw was studded with four thick claws. He looked back at me and nodded once, happy and deviously ready. He wanted this battle the most.  
Tate called Gengar out with a low voice. I watched, waiting for the pokemon to show itself to us, but it vanished beneath the grass like a fish underwater. I scanned the clearing for a shadow, a movement, anything to show us where he was.  
I gritted my teeth together, irritated with Tate's silent battle strategy. What could I do but sit her and wait?  
"When you see it…" I said only loud enough for Samorott to hear. "Use your hydro pump. Don't hold back." I insisted.  
But nothing happened.  
A long, dreading silence stretched on. Samorott was rigid, trying not to fear the moment Gengar would show itself. I had always hated things that popped out and scared you, so this made my skin crawl.  
"Did your pokemon just—I had started to say, but was cut short, due to the huge erupting monster that made the grass look like an oil slick. I nearly screamed, and the force of the pokemon, showing itself and its hundreds of snaggly teeth, forced me to fall backwards. I gasped.  
"Hydro pump!" I demanded, watching as Samorott was stuck in the full force of the pokemons silver eyes.  
Tate laughed triumphant. "Shadow ball."  
It was the first command I had heard him say this whole battle, I was pissed.  
"Dodge it! Samorott!" but his eyes where fixed on the enlarging blob growing in the claws of Gengar. It didn't even look like a pokemon I had ever seen before… and certainly not like how I expected it to look.  
"Samorott!"  
I clutched at the grass, my knuckles turning white with effort and holding my breath as the attack surrounded my pokemon and engulfed it in a wave of black. The moon was covered for a second, by the shape of the great monster, and I blinked just to make out the shape of what was happening.  
I looked up and could finally make out Gengar, not the mass that he carried with him, but just his actual shape. He was smaller than Samorott, with a round body and short limbs. I was shocked. That pokemon presented itself as something much more threatening.  
I stared in horror as the pokemon dove down from the black night sky and into my pokemon.  
Samorott wailed in pain, and though I couldn't see his shape, I felt the ground shake when he fell. How…?  
Gengar gathered the attack back into his monster form and then disappeared beneath the grass, as if nothing had happened.  
"Samorott!" I shoved up off the slick ground and ran over to him, dropping to my knees at his heaving side and laying my hands on his neck. "How did this happen?" I shook my head, blinking in astonishment. Ghost pokemon weren't that strong… there was no way.  
I pulled out his pokeball and called him back quickly, but sat, flustered in the cool grass, not daring to look over my shoulder at Tate. He was walking tours me, slowly by the sound of it.  
I stared up at the moon and tried to picture Gengar's shape in front of it. I was shocked not only with the power of the attack itself, but with the way he presented it. Had Samorott not been caught off guard, he would have stood a better chance. I would have called this cheating, but all was fair in pokemon battles. Even if your opponent wasn't calling out attacks…  
Tate sunk to the ground at my side and leaned back to look up at the starless, black sky. You could just make out clouds rolling in the distance in the direction of the ocean.  
"Sorry." Tate finally said, and it did sort of sound sincere. "We don't like to hold back."  
I shook my head and looked at him. His silver eyes looked soft as feathers, and I was struck once again by how stunning he was. His normally hard look was gone, only when the two of us were ever alone. I sighed.  
"A battle is a battle."  
He nodded in agreement and smiled slightly. "Can I tell you something?"  
I nodded, holding Samorott's pokeball in the palm of my hand, thinking about how terrible it would be to have my pokemon taken away from me again. It was hard enough seeing them lose a fight.  
"A long time ago, before I died." Tate began. "I really… never thought twice about ghost pokemon. I wanted to raise fire and dragon types."  
I looked at him, not sure why he was telling me this, and also not sure how to respond.  
"I had a dragon type…" he mused. "It was close to evolving too… But it turned on me once my heart stopped beating… it was like it couldn't handle the change."  
I flinched. "That's exactly what happened to Kayne. His Garchomp treated him like a stranger and tried to attack him."  
Tate snorted and rolled his eyes. "I could have told him that would happen."  
"Then why didn't you?"  
Tate looked at me with surprise and raised an eyebrow.  
"Kayne was in so much pain… I saw him the night it happened and he was a wreck. He blames you for not telling him about what would happen!"  
Tate swallowed before answering, and I could see the defenses rising again. "I never wanted Kayne to know that he was going to die."  
He knew as well as I did that was a stupid excuse.  
"What would you have done?" Tate asked. "If you had a brother or a sister that you knew was going to die… would you have warned them about it and made them fearful for the rest of their life?"  
"But Tate… whatever death this is… for you guys, you are still hear… you are still able to communicate and… an—  
"Touko I can never go back to the life I once knew." His voice made me shrink back. His eyes pierced through mine. "I had a life once. I had a twin brother—not Kayne but one that shared my blood. I had a mother and a father and dream to raise pokemon and become to strongest trainer to ever live."  
The scowl on my face faded as he went on.  
"I was ambitious… and when I signed with Team Plasma it was because they promised me power, they said I would be strong enough to battle anyone and win… what they didn't tell me was that I had to give up everything else for it."  
I couldn't imagine what it must have been like to be a young teenager with a dream and nothing to hold you back. A contract like that would surely be persuasive. And the regret in Tate's tone made me want to hug him. I had to restrain myself.  
"No one told me that I would be giving up my life and my pokemon. It just happened. And you know what? I realized that that's life. Shit happens." He hissed, but I knew it was just his attempt to shield the pain. "I didn't want Kayne to wallow in his own fear of dying… I wanted him to live while he could. I wanted him to train that Garchomp as long as possible."  
"You thought you were protecting him?"  
"It was the least I could do… he's the only brother I had left."  
"Why don't you guys get along more? Why don't you talk to him about this kind of stuff? Clear the air." I advised. "He would be happy if you did that."  
Tate seemed to take time to think about this, and the moon reflecting in his eyes made me think he was never going to come back to reality. His face was grave.  
"I don't want you and Kayne not to get along." I said after a long moment. "It would mean a lot… to me… If we could all get along." As soon as the words were out I regretted them. Not because it wasn't true, but because I wasn't just referring to Kayne and Tate.  
I realized that I wanted N and Tate to get along too. I didn't want to have to keep leaving one of the other out just because they couldn't get along.  
"I will talk to Kayne…" Tate said simply. "We will be fine. We are brothers after all. And we can't stay mad at each other for very long."  
"Good."  
"So…" Tate changed the subject at this chance. "Looks like it's just me and you for twenty four hours."  
I groaned. "I was hoping you forgot."  
"About your side of the bet?" Tate laughed. "Honestly, did you really think that you could beat me?"  
I rolled my eyes and nodded. "I guess so." With a grunt I leaned back in the soggy grass and folded my hands behind my head. It was a beautiful night out, warm with just enough of a breeze to make it comfortable. It was slightly eerie being out in the trees where no one would see you, but it was peaceful. I hadn't felt peace and serenity like this for a long time.  
"Never underestimate your enemy." Tate advised, leaning back to be lying next to me. He put the back of his hand over his forehead as if to shield the moonlight from his face. "Ghost pokemon are strongest in the shadows, and on nights like this they can summon up more strength to battle with."  
"Ghost pokemon are strange." I mused. "I don't think I knew anything about them until you showed up."  
Tate smirked. "Are you trying to change the subject?"  
I sighed. "So you want me for twenty four hours alone tomorrow?"  
He shrugged. "Well I suppose that would be wasteful, since I have you alone right now."  
I wanted to flinch at the way he spoke; so calm and seductively, simply by accident.  
"You should be happy." I grumbled halfheartedly. "You're getting extra on your side of the bargain."  
"Do you want me to take you home?" he said, though I wasn't sure it was a real offer or not. I pondered the way it would feel lying in my bed right now, with the window open and the hot sheets tangling around my legs while I tried to stay cool. The breeze blew over my face and I couldn't quite think of anything better than this. At least not at the moment…  
"No…" I whispered. "I want to stay here for a little while." and I kid you not, as corny as it may sound, a shooting star flashed above our heads so fast I wasn't sure if it really happened or not.  
"Make a wish." I said, as if to reassure myself it really happened. Tate looked over at me with his silver eyes. He blinked once and a very faint smile touched his lips.  
"My wish already came true…"


	32. Chapter 32

Sun as hot as a stove baked me with a numbing slowness, and it wasn't until I thought my face was on fire did I move.  
My fingers curled into the springy stalks of grass that I had fallen asleep on last night. The pain in half my face made it hard to open my eyes, and the sound of angry humming from a nearby pokemon made it hard to focus. They flickered, trying to adjust to the broad, inescapable sunlight. Disoriented I pushed up, my shoulder stiff from having slept on it, and looked around.  
I was still in the meadow, of course, but Tate was no where to be found. I sighed, now thinking logically. My family must think I ran off again…  
Gently I touched the side of my face which had been facing the sun and flinched. It couldn't have been any later than eight in the morning or so, and I was already starting to burn. With achy legs I got up and started to walk forward. I knew my way back to my house from here, but it was a good mile walk or so. I used to train Mienshao in this meadow.  
Visions of last night flooded me, and I couldn't picture much else but Tate's monster pokemon engulfing my Samorott and defeating it with one blow. I flinched, trying to understand how much devotion was put into raising Gengar.  
It also struck me hard to think that I had indeed lost that battle, and lost he bet. I needed to win that! I groaned. Tate not only with his devious mind and his knowledge of the Plasma castle, but with all his strength, would have been the key to defeating the sages. My hopes spiraled back down to earth and I had to figure out what I could do now. Another bet wouldn't work, consider I couldn't beat Tate, and had nothing that he would want in return for helping.  
My stomach growled, scattering my already troubling thoughts. What would N think when I said I had gone out for a midnight battle with Tate last night and was just left in the meadow alone? He would be livid…  
Guilt ebbed at my stomach. I had only wanted to exercise my pokemon a little! And now I was going to be in a heap. My mother would probably chain me to my bedroom door after I got home.  
"Touko!" From somewhere nearby I heard my name being called. It was frantic, and not the voice I expected. I cocked my head to the side and stopped.  
"Bianca?"  
"Touko!" Her soft shape came running over to me and she stopped with a heavy breath. "Where have you been?"  
"I—I fell asleep in the meadow." I said, unsure of how she would react.  
"Well your mom is freaking out." Bianca huffed, leaning over and holding her knees for support. "She didn't believe Tate when he said you went out for some fresh air last night."  
"Fre—oh! Well… Yeah I just ended up falling asleep…"  
"I know that but she doesn't." Bianca rolled her eyes. "Come on."  
Thank you, thank you Tate for not ruining this even more. I sent a silent prayer and fallowed Bianca. I didn't understand why Tate wouldn't have rubbed it in N's face that I was with him, but I sure was glad he didn't. Maybe Tate and N did have a chance of getting along…  
Of course not. The very thought fell like a brick in my mind. Friendships couldn't be made off of lies, and Tate was lying to him, even if it was doing me a favor.  
"So why did you want fresh air, Touko?" Bianca asked. "I'm surprised you just went alone…"  
I knew she was hinting at why I didn't take N out for a little fresh air too. Guilt gnawed at me and I couldn't look her in the eyes. "I just… I guess I needed some time alone to think."  
"What did you think about?"  
My mind was blank. All I could picture was Tate's strength and unique battle strategy… and his silver eyes. My head whirled back to anything that was relevant to the past few days.  
"A plan." I nearly choked.  
"To defeat Plasma?" She flashed her slightly crooked teeth at me. "Did you come up with anything?"  
I shook my head, remembering what Kayne had said back at the castle. Tate probably already had a plan to destroy team Plasma… too bad he wasn't willing to help us…  
Bianca frowned. "I was talking to Cheren…"  
My eyes came up then. "What did he have to say?"  
"He wants to help… even if he is mad; he wants to stop them as much as you do. He said he was going to the pokemon league to talk to Alder."  
"Alder?" Flashbacks of that terrible night I lost Mienshao hit me and I remembered the champion vaguely giving into Plasma. He hadn't done a damn thing to try and help us that night.  
"He thinks that Alder can help us." Bianca, who hadn't been there, probably didn't think much of this.  
I didn't respond. Maybe Cheren had a point? The champion must have had a good reason for giving into that battle… I would like to talk to him personally some time actually. Giving him a piece of my mind seemed like a good idea. Of course at the moment I was irritated and flustered with all these thoughts.  
"You don't look very good." Bianca commented. "Are you ok?"  
"Lets just hope I don't have sun poisoning." I ran a hand through my tangled hair. "I need a cold shower."  
"Half of you face is red." Bianca tried not to laugh, but the humor was thick in her eyes.  
I sighed, suddenly too exhausted to be angry.

….

"Touko!" My mother's angry howl came as I clutched Bianca's hand, not allowing her to go home until my mother finished her wrath. She would go easy on me with a friend there.  
"Girl you better have a damn good reason for leaving in the middle of the night!" She flew down the stairs, hair still wet, body wrapped in a towel. N fallowed faithfully, eyes full of relief. Butterfree battered my stomach at the very sight of him, but not because I was in love with him, no… this time it was because I knew I was lying to him.  
Bianca tried to turn and leave but I pulled her back around to face my mother. I might as well have been cowering behind her too.  
"Where were you!" My mom growled, pointing a finger at me. I felt sick.  
"I had to get some fresh air… didn't Tate tell you?" I swallowed hard, my dry throat scratchy.  
"Next time you want fresh air you open the window." She snapped and looked at Bianca. "Why don't you go home now? My daughter and I need to have a talk."  
Fury shot through me like lightening, but I didn't stop Bianca from turning and leaving. She shot me a sympathetic glance before shutting the front door. I gritted my teeth together, looking past my mom to N standing behind her, looking at me like I was someone else.  
"So… why?" My mother began, folding her arms over her chest. "I hope you have a good excuse."  
Something in my snapped then, and I realized that this was completely outrageous. "What the HELL does it matter! I told you I needed some fresh air is all!"  
"Don't you dare use that kind of language!" her eyes lit up, reflecting my own anger.  
"You never used to care when I went out! You let me out on my own for a YEAR and never had a problem with it! Did you think I stopped being a trainer? Or did you think we went back in time to me being five again?"  
My mother raised her fist in the way she always did when she was angry. She would never hit me of course, but to anyone not used to the gesture might think that. I was jolted back when N put himself between me and my mother, his back to her. I curled my fingers into his shirt and looked at my mom, my eyebrows pulling together.  
"It's ok, N." I nudged him aside and faced my mother again, though he stayed next to my side, looking skeptical the whole time.  
"It's not ok!"  
"You can't be afraid of letting me out of this house!" I snarled. "I can protect myself you know!"  
"You've proven that you can't!" she through her arms up. "What do I have to do?"  
"What do you mean?" I crossed my arms.  
"Ground you?" she looked at me like I was stupid.  
"What!" I gaped. I hadn't been grounded since I was eleven years old and she wanted to start again now?  
"I don't know what else to do."  
"I haven't done anything wrong!" I screamed, now desperate. If my mother thought she could just take my pokemon like she used to take Mienshao away she was crazy. I was plenty old enough to be out on my own, let alone being grounded!  
"You left in the middle of the night! Don't you realize how dangerous that is! You could have been attacked! You could have been killed!"  
"Mom your psycho!" I pulled my arm away from N and stormed around her, heading for the stairs.  
"Get back here!" she began to fallow me, hiking her towel up higher under her arms.  
I ran to my room as quickly as I could, trying not to picture N's lost stair. It was plain as day on his face that he didn't understand normal parent to child arguments. He never stood up for himself. He was too afraid.  
Slamming the door and locking it I went to my window and threw it open. Dust billowed in the air and I stuck my head out the window and sucked in a deep breath. Whenever I was frustrated I used to stick my head out the window and pretend I was somewhere else. It wasn't helping this time though.  
"I knew this would happen." Tate's voice made me jolt around. I surprised myself; for once he was the only person I wasn't mad at, when usually he was always on my shit list.  
I ground my teeth together, not realizing until now that tears were rimming in my eyes. Tears of anger for having a mother that didn't trust me when I had never done anything wrong. We were all against Team Plasma and their ideas of liberation, why was everyone so afraid of me going off on my own!  
Tate gave me a look of quiet surprise. He took a step over to me and reached for a bag I hadn't realized was sitting on my bed. It was black and had a long zipper over the top. He picked it up by the strap and held his empty hand out to me.  
"Need those twenty four hours?" he smiled.  
I wasn't sure exactly what I was thinking, but suddenly nothing felt more reassuring than some time alone with the one person who wasn't afraid of the world. If there was any good quality in Tate it was that he was willing to let me break a couple "rules" now and again. Anger faded into a devious smile across my face and I grasped Tate's hand tightly.  
"Yes please." I said solemnly.


	33. Chapter 33

Alright guys the next few chapters might confuse you a little just because they skip perspectives a lot. So bear with me and keep in mind that this is all over a TWENTY FOUR hour span in the story. a lot is said for such a short amount of time. pay attention to details! Thanks and enjoy!

Also~ Im terribly sorry for past confusion. Especially with the duplicate of one chapter. It was an accident but my numbering will be screwed up if I try to fix it at the moment.

~~~~

~N~

"Touko!" My stomach was in a knot as her mother pounded on the bedroom door, screaming and yelling terrible things through the wood.  
I was leaning stiffly against the wall, watching with wide eyes, wishing that I could just be with Touko and hug her and make her feel better. Was she crying? Was she hurt? Or afraid?  
Touko didn't seem to be afraid of her mother, even when she threatened to hit her. My mouth twisted down into a tight scowl and I couldn't break free of the memories of Ghetsis hitting me. Touko had told me that wasn't normal… that it was wrong, and here her mother was on the verge of it herself.  
Was Touko the one who was wrong about this? I shook my head, no… Touko was always right when it came to this kind of stuff.  
"I will give you three seconds to open this door young lady!" Her mother howled in a way that made me cringe. As she said this she reached up and clawed along the top of the door. I watched in horror as she found a key and brought it down.  
"Three." She hissed, shoving the key in. "Two!" her voice crackled with anger. "Touko! That's it!" and she flung the door open.  
A thud sounded against the wall and I peered in, expecting to see her climbing out the window or something crazy. But she was no where to be seen at all. My heart kicked up into a shallow trot and my mouth hung open in shock. She just… vanished.  
"Touko…" Her mother's voice became clouded with fear, and I could see all her muscles, which had been stiff, roll back into a defeated limp.  
I had never raised a voice to anyone higher up than me, and it was hard to believe that Touko's mother deserved this, but even I thought her actions were too harsh. So what Touko left? So what if she decided she wanted to go skydiving and land over the ocean? What would her mother do to stop her then? She couldn't possibly think Touko would stay here in this house forever?  
A strange sensation came over me, it was one of those human sensations that I knew I'd never feel if I hadn't fallen in love with Touko. Would I have stayed in that castle my whole life? I flinched, knowing that without Touko I would have… until the day I died.  
Slight anger ebbed at me, and I ground my teeth together. "She's gone again!" the words were out before I could stop them. Her mother whirled and looked at me with a daring expression.  
I stood my ground. "You can't stop her…"  
"You are wrong! She is MY daughter! I can do whatever I want with her! And when she comes back you can bet she will be grounded for life."  
Suddenly my thoughts seemed too real. The blood boiled under my skin and I had to fight to keep my voice down. "She has the heart of a pokemon."  
Her mother looked darkly at me, probably thinking I was mad. I continued anyways.  
"She is wild… and powerful, and you know as well as I do that she will always do what she knows is right. She is stubborn and arrogant but she is smart. She is pure. Like a wild pokemon. She can't be tamed." It was the longest speech I had ever given to anyone except grunts and Touko herself. I swallowed hard.  
"And you know you can't keep her here." I turned then, my heart racing, my skin tingling in all the normal placed Ghetsis used to hit me. I felt like I was burning, like I was on fire. Her mother didn't move though, she stood in the line of sunlight from the open window dazed as I turned and headed back down the stairs.  
I wasted no time once I was out of sight. I wanted Touko here and safe as much as she did, maybe even more, but I knew that her mother was going about this the wrong way. Whatever life Touko had grown up living for the past seventeen years of her life, she was different now. Those long two months of hell since her Mienshao died, in the time it took for the trees to grow leaves and for the sun to get hot, she had changed.  
Her mother didn't realize it because she hadn't seen it. Angry, I threw open the front door and was faced with an invisible dilemma. I had never been out on my own before… even when I appeared to be alone the shadow triad has always been right there, somewhere hidden but within a safe distance.  
I didn't know what came over me, but suddenly staying in this tiny town waiting just felt like a disease waiting to kill me. With a grunt I yanked out Reshiram's pokeball and threw it out in front of me. I took a deep breath, waves of heat wafting over me like a boiling ocean.  
I could find Touko myself.

"So what's the plan?" I asked, trying to find any way to distract myself from the guilt of leaving N. What was I thinking? Was I just stupid? Or was this really necessary? I couldn't be sure… all I knew was that going home just to get yelled at again sounded like a terrible idea. My mother would learn really quick that she was being unreasonable as soon I didn't come home for a few hours…  
Twenty four to be exact.  
"It's 10:16 right now." Tate said matter of fact, looking up at the giant clock facing north of Castalia City. It was a proud piece of art work that was at the top of the most stunning hotel, almost as beautiful as the team plasma castle, but not nearly as miserable.  
"Alright, first, I want to take you somewhere." Tate spoke up. "I don't know if… if you care, but it's worth a shot right?"  
"Shot at what?" I couldn't make myself seem even remotely disappointed. Anything to be out of the house… anything to be away from my mother.  
"I want to show you where I grew up." Tate looked sincere now. "And I haven't been back since I left… so… I might need a hand to hold?"  
"Very funny." I shook my head. "I thought you could never go back?"  
"Well I can't really, but I can show you the house. I think you will see me in a different light too."  
I sighed softly and shrugged. "Sure, what the hell we have twenty four hours to kill."  
Tate laughed. "We don't have any time to waste!" and just like that he grabbed my hand. I yanked it away from him though. "You don't think I can just hang around out in public wearing this all day do you?" I challenged.  
The tank top I had gone to sleep in last night was stained from the grass and water last night and the shorts looked like they hadn't been washed in a year. It was bad enough people were looking at me now, and I had just gotten here!  
"Oh right…" Tate pursed his lips. "How luxurious do I have to treat you?" he handed me the black bag with the long zipper and raised his eyebrow.  
"You better treat me like a princess." I muttered sarcastically. He flashed me a perfect smile and grabbed my wrist this time, though gently enough not to make me flinch. Hi skin was so cold it made me wonder how I had not guessed he was dead before.  
"Sounds good to me." He agreed and with a flash we were falling. I squirmed in the dank air, desperate for anything to hold onto to save myself. I really had a problem with free-falling lately…  
But it was short lived, even before I had a breath to take we had landed somewhere that smelt of lemon freshener and clean sheets. I blinked open my eyes and found myself clutching to Tate's chest, having feared for my life for a split second there.  
The magnificent room was large and a lovely olive tone. Everything matched from the walls to the carpet to the bed to the amazing chandelier hanging above the huge bed that's headboard was candle-lined. Suggestive… I quivered.  
"What is this?" I growled, but Tate seemed to be gone already. I didn't know what to do, so I stood like a deerling caught in a pair of headlights for as long as I could until the impulse to look around came over me. Outside the glorious balcony was the whole Castalia City, shining in the bright sunshine. The smells of restaurants cooking brunch came wafting over and made my stomach growl.  
"Tate!" I called again louder. There was no reply. What was his problem! Abandoning me in the most amazing hotel room in the region… how dare he?  
I walked awkwardly to the bathroom door, afraid that if I wasn't careful someone would jump out and scare me. Suddenly things were too silent… too stunning. I put my hand on the doorknob and a voice startled me.  
"TATE!" A familiar voice blasted the silence away. "Tate!"  
Kayne skidded to a stop by me, having just teleported and needing a landing spot. I noticed how much more perfected Tate was at teleporting in comparison to Kayne.  
"What!" I jolted nearly out of my skin as he crashed into me and snagged his hands around my waist. I squeaked in terror.  
"You will have to do!" he threw me over his broad shoulder and held me like a child. I felt all his muscles tighten and the smell of wilderness clung to him like the dirt on his face. I was about to punch him in the face for not telling me what was happening, but the familiar rush of teleporting stopped me in my tracks.  
It was similar to the feeling of your lungs screaming for air and still having many feet to go to the surface. I raked my nails down his neck and shoulder with fear, begging for a landing. These two boys needed to stop doing this to me!  
We hit the ground hard and I was plucked like a ragdoll from his back, a magnetic pull dragging me across the ground. I grunted with pain and slammed my fist into the pine needle covered ground.  
"What the HELL!" I hissed as he clutched my arm and yanked me upward.  
"Hurry! Come on!" His white eyes were wild, exuberant. I nearly tripped and fell on my face, but suddenly the mood shifted.  
"It's my Garchomp! I found him!" Kayne charged ahead faster. I noticed in his hand was a pokeball, old and worn looking. It was obviously the same one he originally caught the pokemon with.  
"But! But Kayne!" I raced after him, a step or so behind.  
"Go that way!" He ordered me. "Head him off!"  
"What! What way!" I turned and started to go in a painfully diagonal path, weaving through trees.  
"HURRY!" Kayne yelled. "Help me fight him!"  
I couldn't believe my ears, not because this was all happening so fast, but because Garchomp's furious roar was bouncing off the trees and making it hard to focus on anything. I ran though, suddenly realizing what this could mean. If Kayne could re-catch him… maybe they did have a chance?  
The giant blue dragon crashed through the foliage suddenly and halted, sliding in the mud and a large gash in the front of his leg. Blood swelled and pumped and I could see the tangle of barbed wire still clinging to it, digging in further. My heart went out to the pokemon, but my common sense made me realize I would either die facing it or fight it.  
I stopped dead in my tracks and whipped out my pokeball. "Samorott!" I yelled. "Let's go!" and I threw the ball as hard as I could at the Garchomp.  
My pokemon, thought still somewhat weak from fighting Gengar, was ready. He turned and with my quick say so, launched a hefty water pulse. The rage filled dragon fell back with a shriek and the ground trembled. I caught a glimpse of Kayne, sliding down over the top of a boulder to his pokemon's side. Terror was in his eyes, making me race over.  
The blood was washed away by Samorott's attack and left a thick, but clean gash revealed. Kayne yanked his shirt off before the blood could seep any further and wrapped it around the wound. I put my hand hesitantly on the pokemons neck, assuming it was defeated and not that it was just too shocked to fight back.  
I growled a low rumble at me and I had to back off. Kayne came over to where I had crouched and placed his hand over the thick, rough skin. His eyes gleamed with fear and relief at the same time.  
"Garchomp…" He croaked. "It's me Kayne."  
The pokemon opened its jaws wide and a blue flame flickered in the back of his throat, but it turned into a pathetic stream of smoke. Kayne didn't flinch, nor would he have if Garchomp did attack him. He bravely stroked the pokemon on his neck and jaw.  
"You badass." He laughed. "Think you can just attack me." But love shone in his eyes like diamonds. "You stubborn pokemon. You know who I am!"  
Garchomp snarled weakly, but an understanding lit his gaze.  
Kayne held up the pokeball to his pokemon and smiled. "Get back in your ball."  
I had to assume that the way Kayne told him pokemon he loved them was by insulting them or barking orders at them, but at the same time I was envying the relationship. Samorott was standing back watching his content eyes. I raised my hand and set it on his furry chest.  
Garchomp tried to raise his head but it only flopped back down after a second of strain. He was breathing heavily, his eyes lighter than I had ever seen them. The noise he made this time was softer, apologetic.  
Kayne patted his jaw once more and then raised the pokeball and called him back in. I stared in awe as he stood back up, looking just as much like hell as he looked triumphant. His clothes were tattered and his hair was so dirty you wouldn't know it was white. His freckles were hidden beneath smeared mud and I smiled back at him.  
"Whoever said I wouldn't be able to do it was wrong." He breathed heavily. "Garchomp is mine."  
"Nice one." Tate's solemn voice sounded like music in comparison to Tate's. I looked around, remembering that he had left me in a hotel room only moments ago. I cocked my head to the side, trying to think of a reasonable explanation for all of this. I didn't even know where I was, just that Kayne had caught back his beloved pokemon and that Tate's face was too hard to read.  
Was he angry?  
Kayne blinked with a strange expression and I understood. Tate and Kayne had yet to talk about what happened with me and the castle. Neither of them looked very threatened or willing to fight, especially Kayne.  
"What the hell have you been doing little bro?" Tate strode forward, his shoulders rolled, his neck glinted in the dappled sunshine, and for the first time he didn't look like something of a demon, but more like an angel. Excusing his language of course…  
Kayne let out a shaky breath and an unspoken conversation flashed in the boy's eyes. Tate walked up to Kayne only to receive a friendly punch in the shoulder.  
Tate snorted and rolled his silver eyes. "Don't think you are off the hook just because you impress me."  
"Oh shut up." Kayne looked about ready to collapse, but his eyes were bright as the sun. "Don't tell me you aren't going to forgive me?" he added sarcastically.  
Tate raised his hand, and at first I thought he would punch his brother back, but the palm of his hand came down on his shoulder and he gripped tightly. "You did good."  
Was it just me or did they both flash me the same humor, smug faced, gleaming smirk? I couldn't be sure; all I knew was that I was feeling a swelling happiness in my chest. I will be the first to admit I didn't have a clue how siblings worked, but I knew they weren't supposed to hate each other, especially not over a girl. Not over me…  
Kayne was beaming, looking as if he had finally earned his keeps with Tate. He scrubbed his arm across his face and moved the mud from the bridge of his nose. You could see a few freckles coming through, which turned into an opportunity to change the subject.  
"Hey look at that." Tate chuckled. "Freckles?"  
Kayne scowled half-heartedly. "Don't ask me how they got there."  
"Right." Tate nodded, raising his brow skeptically. He turned and looked back at me. "Did you even get to see our room?"  
"What?" I hadn't realized that I was leaning all my weight on Samorott, running my fingers through the long white fur under his jaw. For the first time since the Plasma castle I felt the effects of exhaustion.  
"The hotel room." Tate was trying not to grin evilly. "You didn't think I would be spending twenty four hours with you in your house right?"  
Part of me wanted to slap him, but the other part was being battered with butterfree. I hadn't really considered that Tate wouldn't want to spend out time together back at my house, but then again that would be too easy for me. Tate always had to go and make things difficult. I bit my lower lip and looked past Tate to see Kayne fighting laughter.  
I sighed. "I hate you Tate." It struck me like a bolt of lightening that I didn't hate him at all…  
Tate flashed me that wicked smile and returned the punch owed to Kayne, only it was harder than it needed to be. He rubbed his shoulder and perched his lips, but didn't argue.  
"Good luck." I heard him grumble as Tate strode tours me.  
I pushed back off of Samorott and pulled his pokeball back out to call him in. The massive pokemon disappeared from me side and before I had time to wobble my weight back onto my legs Tate scooped me up.  
I gasped as my weight disappeared beneath me, and was somewhat repulsed to see him wink at Kayne before teleporting. I raised my hand and smack Tate on the face, only the lack of energy turned into a lulling swoop of my hand. The scowl never faded from my face, and my narrowed eyes got narrower when I couldn't find it in me to pull my hand away. My fingertips slid down the length of his neck and stopped over his collar bone.  
What was wrong with me?


	34. Chapter 34

I hastily showered, cleansing myself and dirtying the beautiful bathroom at the same time. I barely had enough sense to wash my hair, let alone dry off once I got out. Why was I so tired all of the sudden?  
I was still damp when I reached for the black bag with the long zipper and undid it. I reached inside, trying to imagine what Tate could have possibly thrown together in such a short amount of time. I pulled out a soft material, thin and silky, and then dropped It. I pursed my lips together and called weakly.  
"Tate, you don't really expect me to wear this dress!"  
There was no reply. An aching wave of exhaustion made the inside of my skull throb painfully. I groaned and stood, leaving the bag on the floor behind the door and going out into the room with nothing but a towel on.  
Tate had vanished again. My eyes lolled with sleepiness and I couldn't understand. At first the cold shower had helped, but then I felt as thought my chest was alight with bubbles of air, popping and dragging me further into exhaustion. I stumbled over to the giant bed, suddenly aware that nothing was more important than sleeping.  
I didn't know what was wrong with me, but I didn't feel all that bad. It was kind of peaceful actually. Before I knew it I had collapse on the far right side of the bed and buried my wet face into the huge pillows. I made one final attempt to cover myself, but I couldn't get my arm to lift the blanket. A towel would have to do… it didn't matter…. I …. Had… to…  
Slee…

"Mien!"  
Glorious flowers dotted the field in front of me and blue sky stretched out as far as I could see. My heart galloped and a hallow, giddy feeling ebbed at the back of my mind. Things felt suddenly right… perfect. Cool air glided over my wrists, my hair, and my fingertips. They twitched with delight and I could smell something similar to honey and ferns in the breeze. I smiled.  
"Mienshao!"  
Her lithe, long body came rushing over to me on all fours. She ran with a swiftness even a leipard couldn't match. Her long silky fur was flowing out behind her, and her strong shoulders rippled with lean muscle. I held my arms out to her and dropped to my knees.  
She leapt and bound over, thrusting her face into my neck and making a purring noise.  
"I missed you so much." I pressed my face into her fur and breathed in the familiar scent. It brought back memories of training her when she was just a Mienfoo. My heart was racing in my chest. She licked my face once and then pulled back to look into my eyes with her intelligent ones. Sadness swelled in them for what reason I couldn't be sure.  
"You look so pretty." I choked, tears starting to swell in my eyes. "Where have you been?"  
She just shook her head and jumped out of my lap. "Mien! Miens!" she squeaked and started to dash away.  
"Wait!" I yelled and scrambled up to fallow. I had to nearly spring to catch up with her, and she didn't slow until we neared the edge of this field. The buttery sunshine seemed to stop like a wall where the trees lined up like soldiers. Mienshao broke through the first layer and then suddenly halted, ears pulled back. She sat up on her hind legs and pointed past a gushing river.  
Directly on the other side was a mass of gray. I blinked in surprise, seeing as though the heaven I was standing in now was split by the violent water. And not only that, but halfway through the crystal clear liquid it turned into a churning expanse of brown. I noticed that no trees grew on the other side, probably too soaked to sustain any life. I couldn't tell where the clouds parted into the sunshine above me and Mienshao, but I knew that I was happy to be here.  
Thunder cracked on the other side and swallowed hard.  
"What does that mean?" I whispered to Mienshao. She looked up at me with narrowed eyes and gestured for me to look again. I squinted into shadows and could see that just past the bank was a glowing ball of light. I stared in confusion at the little orange thing until something else caught my eye.  
"N!" I shouted, unable to control myself. The silence broke like glass on concrete and Mienshao flew up my leg and my back to be perched on my shoulders. Her face was frantic, but expectant.  
I blinked in confusion as N just stared; no… he was scowling at me from across the river. A frown turned my lips down and I opened my mouth to speak but couldn't find the right words. His expression was… violent. I hadn't seen that amount of hatred in his eyes since his liberation days.  
I looked at Mienshao, desperate for an answer, and then gasped when that little orange ball flashed like lightening. My eyes grew huge as the rain pouring down took flame like droplets of gasoline, rather than water. The dead grass crackled and spread literally like a wild fire. I gaped in horror as N stood motionless in the center of the hell.  
"N!" I yelled to him, but his eyes only narrowed at me. Tears started to swell in my eyes and suddenly my hands felt numb, all the warmth slipped through them. I balled them up into tight fists and fought the urge to dive into the raging waters in front of me.  
The rain turned into a fall of fire beyond me and I couldn't take it anymore. N was covered by the mass, burning in it, smothered by black smoke and ash. My face turned white as the wind blew and embers danced across the river in the wind. Mienshao jumped down from my shoulder and landed in front of me, her face serious, and her eyes pleading.  
"Mien…" A very unnatural voice slipped from her mouth, it was almost human sounding. I swallowed hard, my gaze flickering from her to N.  
"Mienshao!" She cried suddenly, and I understood.  
Run…  
She was telling me to run.  
"Mii!" her voice was desperate, trying to tell my something, trying to warm me about the dangers on the other side. My heart was racing and I took a few steps back, unable to see N's shape anymore.  
My beloved pokemon charged towards me, edging my back to the safety of the meadow and the sunshine. She kept glancing back frantically as the embers dared to reach our side, and kept yelling at me. Run! Run! RUN!  
Finally I turned and fled, as much as I didn't want to leave N, I had to, I had to run and save my pokemon from standing in the line of fire. Mienshao wouldn't move until she knew I was really going. Tears fell from my face as I reached the giant field once again and saw the dandelions swaying the in the peaceful breeze.  
"Touko…" a very soft voice made me look up. My chest tingled with that strange airy feeling again and I shook my head, horror making me unable to speak.  
I left him… I left N for himself and I didn't protect him… I couldn't save him. My heart nearly stopped. I watched the destruction engulf him and it didn't quite come to me that the destruction might just so happen to be my fault. After all, fire had been set to the rain.  
Was this an omen?  
I shuddered as Mienshao looked up at me, her eyes sorry. I could see the reflection of myself in them and I knew I looked as bad as I felt. Guilt ate away at me as Tate came over from across the field. I squeezed my eyes shut for a quick second, trying to make sense of this. When I opened my eyes again he was right there in front of me.  
Tate held his hand out to me and I didn't understand what was going on. Tell me Mienshao… help me understand, I begged. But she was gone now, vanished like a ghost pokemon.  
My lower lip quivered with terror and for the first time I felt like I wasn't the one protecting, but the one needed to be protected. The wind brought with it the smell of smoke, and I had to force all the horrid thoughts back into the pit of my stomach. I wrapped my arms around Tate's waist and cried into his chest.  
"What does it mean!" I whimpered to Mienshao, wherever she may be. "Why can't I protect N!"  
Tate's hand stroked the back of my hair but he didn't say anything that could help me. Why? Why was this happening? Just as I thought maybe I could look up and beg Tate for an answer the familiar sickening jolt of adrenalin hit me. I clutched tighter to him, my fingernails digging into the small of his back as we teleported from this nightmare.

~Tate~

It was happening… Finally after so many days and nights wondering what Touko could possibly see in N and not me… it was happening.  
She was falling in love with me. Slowly but surely, like the way she touched my face, in a poor attempt to hit me, she was falling for yours truly. I was jittery with excitement, thinking that this was going to work out in my favor. Twenty four hours, another bet, twenty four more ours, then two days, three, up to week of time alone with her. She would come around, she would love me and the time we had together and she would forget all about the king.  
I was bubbling with a strange high, my hand lying palm up in hers as she slept in the giant bed. Wet hair sprawled out all over the place, clinging to the plush pillows and her face. She wasn't aware of my hand there… just lying in hers, but she also didn't know that she had curled her fingers around it twice unconsciously. A vague attempt to get closer to me... she didn't know it because she wasn't coherent asleep, but somewhere in the back of her mind she knew it was me there with her. Instinct was what drew her fingers around the cool shape of my hand. That was all I needed.  
Turns out back in Kanto, where Kayne had made his amazing catch, Touko must have stepped too close to an oddish hole or something, because she had barely enough energy to take a shower and wrap herself in a towel before collapsing in the bed, dead asleep. And yes, she was still in nothing but a towel, but I wasn't looking. I would take a lie detector test to prove you wrong, I wasn't looking because I wasn't stupid. Why would I ruin a good thing I had going?  
Even if I DID want to look at Touko and her bare body while she was completely knocked out, I wouldn't risk the chance of her waking up on me. And yes, you can believe I DID very badly want to. But I was being extra careful; I had put the sheet over her and the towel, except for her right arm and hand.  
She needed to get a feel for my hand; she needed to unconsciously know the temperature, the texture of my skin, the contour of my long fingers, and everything else that would plant a seed of thought in her mind. It would whisper my name to her while she slept.  
I could have been upset about these wasted hours, but we were together, so it was enough for me.  
Part of me was actually sort of happy for this sensual time. The sound of her breathing was willing the silence to stretch on and on, and the smell of expensive conditioner was edging ME on and on.  
Let this moment never end…  
I smiled and stretched out my other empty hand. It slid off the end of the bed and hung limp, fingers twitching for Gengar to come. Crypt beat him too the gesture though, being faster and more willing. I remembered now, feeling the warm pokemon, how excited I was to give him to Touko, and how thrilled I was when she loved him.  
Genger slipped like a shadow up the side of the bed and crawled over me. A thick mass of purple and black fog manifested at me feet and frowned at me, seeing as though both my hands were preoccupied. Jealousy flashed in his eyes and with a devious wide, smile he brought his claws up.  
"Don't you dare!" I whispered harshly.  
He stuck his tongue out at me and with a quick wave of his arms he flung the sheet off of Touko and flipped the towel back. I fought with every compelling urge to punch him in his head, knowing that he would jut disappear and laugh anyways. Crypt let out a shrill wail as I jumped off the side of the bed and reached for the sheet.  
Touko stirred, the sudden cold air making her uncomfortable. I wanted to be good and not take the chance, but a little voice in the back of my head made this impossible to pass up. I pulled the sheet up over her, but held it with my arms for a moment, my eyes scanning her bare body quickly and thoroughly before setting the cover over her.  
I swallowed hard, my whole body feeling suddenly hot. Had N ever seen her naked? Did he know how stunningly gorgeous she was? I imagined myself clutching and ripping my hair out. Since when did I use words like "gorgeous"? But then again… since when did I get the chance to look at the girl I loved in her birthday suite?  
I closed my eyes, burning the image in the back of my mind where it would never be forgotten. Did N know that she had a scar just below her left nipple? Taking a deep, shaky breath I looked back at Gengar, who was growing into a larger mass, teeth jutting out like those of a Sharpedo's. Crypt was mimicking the action, his silver eyes glowing angry.  
"Stop it!" I snapped at the two of them. Crypt retreated quickly to my side and Gengar just morphed back into the fat blob he usually was. I shook my head at him.  
"I ought to disown you." I tried my best to look pissed instead of pleased. How could I look pissed though when he had, in a sense, done me a favor?  
Gengar stuck his tongue back out at me and it wriggled like a wurmple. I shook my head at him, about to say something when a darkening came over the window.  
I looked in just enough time to see the shape of a famous dragon pokemon behind the pale curtains. A fist of rage hit me square in the chest and I silently willed Touko to keep sleeping.  
"Damn you N." I snarled under my breath. "I won't let you find her until these twenty four hours are up."

~N~

Citizens cowered in the shade of the buildings below me as I flew across the sky with Reshiram. It was no surprise to anyone of course… they had been waiting for their king to come back out in public ever since Touko "died", or so they thought. That night so long ago, when Mienshao had been killed and Touko had been captured, they all gave up hope. I felt sick.  
Not because of guilt, or because I was sorry for their fear, but because for the first time in a long time I felt powerful… feared…  
And I liked it.  
No! No… you are here to find Touko and that's all. I argued with myself, trying to focus on the ground belong me. Reshiram circled the city quite a few times while I searched, looking for a red tinted wave of hair in the crowds. If she was here it wouldn't be hard to find her though, because she would be the only person that hadn't gone home or somewhere out of sight. I flinched.  
They feared me…  
I couldn't believe that no matter how much fear I felt myself, with Ghetsis and battling and losing Touko, I couldn't comprehend that I was making others fearful. And I liked it…  
With a sickening crunch Reshiram landed where there was barely any space, making the bricks of a wall crumble. I scowled but wasted no time. She was too hot to stay on very long, and I wanted to get a feel for this first hand.  
The people scattered like frightened pidoves, leaving nothing but an angry humming noise to linger in the air. The neon of a sign flickered in the mid-day sun and I had to look away, pretending the waste of energy didn't bother me. I scanned the area, about to call out Touko's name, just in case she was around and hadn't seen me.  
I stopped though, my mouth open slightly, and to my left, beyond a dumpster was a soft whimpering. My heart kicked up into a gallop and I strode over, leaving Reshiram to rest her wings in the sun. The sound stopped suddenly and was replaced with a gasp as my shadow covered the stinking thing. I scowled and peered around the side.  
My eyes opened wide, and to my shock it was a little boy and a pokemon. His face was dirty, his hair tangled, and his clothes ripped and dirty. He had a small cut on his cheek and his big brown eyes looked ready to pop out of his head. Tears were in his eyes. But none of this was what I was focused on.  
Anger flared in my chest.  
"What have you done!" I hissed, seeing as though the very tiny Patrat he held was on the brink of death. Starvation made it tremble, and its eyes were closed. I looked at the boy and ground my teeth together.  
"Don't hurt him!" He bared his teeth at me and I could see he was shaking.  
"What did you do!" I didn't realize all those feelings of pokemon and abuse and liberation had come suddenly rushing back until I raised my hands, acting on instinct, and tried to take the pokemon away.  
The boy yanked backwards and scrambled to his feet, ready to flee, but he was cornered.  
"I didn't do it!" he cried. "I found him like this!"  
I didn't believe it. "You aren't allowed to have a pokemon." I mustered up my best leader voice. I was king… I was the one making the rules.  
"You're not taking him!" The boy shouted. "He's m—mine!"  
"He's going to die!" I snarled at the boy, reaching once again for the pokemon in the arms of its stinking owner. Regardless of the law or not this pokemon needed medical help now.  
"No!" Tears streamed from his determined eyes. "No!" I was shocked when he turned then, shoved the dumpster as hard as he could with his shoulder and squeezed between the opening into the back part of the alley.  
How dare he refuse to help a sick pokemon? Had he even considered it being ill? Surely he was too young to know what he was doing…  
I moved the filthy metal tub and walked back there to fallow him. He had disappeared but the sound of his cries lead me to a strange piece of tarp covering two broken chairs.  
"You can't keep that pokemon!" I said. "It needs to be healed!"  
"You're just a big bully!" the boy cried back, then broke off into a fit of coughing. I flinched and strained to listen to something beyond the torment.  
I would fight you if I had strength…  
I stopped, standing outside the make-shift ten and listening. The Patrat… it was speaking to me?  
I am the protector of this boy… He is homeless. Leave us alone. You are frightening him…  
"But… but you are…" I whispered.  
Sick? I know. Dying? Yes, but I would rather die beside my partner than in the arms of a stranger.  
I felt absolutely wretched. What did he mean he didn't want help? And this boy wasn't homeless… obviously his home was right here in this tent. Though why anyone would want to live behind an alley in the city I didn't know…  
"Go away!" Brown eyes peered out from a rip in the tarp; they were puffy and infected looking. The boy was in almost as bad a shape as the Patrat.  
"Your pokemon…" I quivered. "It needs help…"  
I'm going to die…  
The little voice was determined to haunt me. I balled my hands up into fists. This was no environment for a pokemon to begin with! It was this kid's fault that he was dying! Tears swelled in my eyes. Didn't he know pokemon needed to be taken care of?  
"Help it!" I screeched at the kid.  
"Go away!" he wailed back, hiccupping and choking on another cough. "Don't take my pokemon!"  
My heart went to my throat as the little Patrat sent his last thoughts to me.  
Leave us to d-  
With a sickening gasp I turned, my mind whirling and my heart pounding. My throat was tight and my whole body felt numb as I fled from the alley, leaving the boy and the still warm corpse behind.  
How could people be so cruel?  
How had I even begun to believe that pokemon could live with people without consequences?


	35. Chapter 35

What a terrible dream…  
My eyes flickered open to see that it was surprisingly dim out. I was disoriented for a second, having forgotten all about where I was and trying to figure out why N wasn't next to me, where he was safest. The dream lingered in my mind until I turned and could see the olive toned sheets covering my bare body. I almost screamed, but caught myself in just the right about of time.  
Tate was curled up, his back facing me and his shoulders exposed between the thin material of a white tank top. The room was hot, despite the obvious air going and the covered windows.  
"Tate?" I murmured, thinking about that dream. I had run from N on behalf of Mienshao's word… and ended up in his arms. What was wrong with me?  
I should have gotten out of that bed, stark naked or not and left. I should have gone to find N to make sure he was ok. I needed to do something about this, and yet the way he had glared at me…  
That dream just ruined everything I ever thought about his gentle, innocent soul. Mienshao didn't even trust him. Was that the real reason why she had shown up the night me and N had nearly done it? Was she warning me then?  
But warning me of what? N hadn't done anything wrong…  
I flinched as Tate turned to look at me, his silver eyes soft like feathers again. He blinked once, and I noticed for the first time, a scar jutting through his right eyebrow. His lips twisted into a crooked smile, not nearly as deadly as his usual gleam, but just as heart-wrenching.  
"Good afternoon." He rolled his eyes at me. "Just had to sleep didn't you?"  
"I don't know what happened to me…" I murmured, trying to remember anything past that awful dream. Kayne had caught his Garchomp again… that's right.  
"I do." He turned his head and look up at the ceiling. "In Kanto there are pokemon called Oddish; adorable little grass types with nasty sleep powder attacks. I think you may have stepped too close to one."  
"That makes sense." I murmured, just to move on with the conversation.  
"I never knew you slept all natural though." Tate flicked his scarred eyebrow up deviously, making me turn a cherry red color. I didn't know what to say. I was too baffled to be angry, and too terrified of that dream to care about what he could have seen. It came back to me though, that I hadn't put clothes on because the only thing to wear in that black bag was a dress.  
"I wasn't going to put on a dress." I challenged, some anger hinting at my voice.  
"You didn't even try it on did you?" Tate's voice was sarcastically offended. "I know you will like it once you try it.'  
"How do you know a thing about me liking dresses?" I glowered. "I'm putting my other clothes back on." But I made no attempt to move.  
"Oh really?"  
"Really."  
Tate shrugged and rolled to be facing away from me again. I sighed and had to convince myself that it was the sleeping powder that made me have such a crazy dream… and nothing else.  
I wrapped the long sheet around myself twice and pried it out from under Tate to walk away. He made a show of covering his face with both his hands, promising not to peek. I half-ran to the bathroom.  
"How many hours did I waste?" I yelled back to him once the door was shut and locked. I guess it was unnecessary, considering if Tate really wanted to come in he would just teleport.  
"Only all the daylight." I heard his voice almost instantly, it sounded much closer to the door too. "But that is ok, I liked watching you sleep."  
"I hope you didn't enjoy what you saw too much." I swallowed, reminding myself of how self conscious I had been when it was N seeing me naked for the first time. No one else had ever seen my body up until… well now.  
"Touko, I put the sheet over you." Tate stated calmly.  
"What is that supposed to mean?"  
"It means I'm no pervert who looks at you while you are naked." I could almost hear his eyes roll as I examined my dirty clothes. I realized how repulsive they really were and decided that I didn't have a choice but to wear the dress.  
"So you didn't see anything?" I said, pulling the dress up to my face. I scanned it thoroughly, seeing that it was shorter than I expected. It was all black, with lace and a strappy back. I groaned.  
"I didn't say that." Tate corrected. "I was sort of forced to see things… But that doesn't mean I was looking."  
I didn't understand so I ignored him and started untying the back of the dress. It was actually very beautiful, and I loved the pattern of black roses around the sweet-heart top.  
"Do you like it?" Tate said after a moment.  
"How did you know I was putting it on?" I shot back, not wanting to admit that it was the best looking thing I had ever seen myself in. Where had he even found it?  
"Because no one would deliberately wear those rags you call pajamas." He laughed. "Especially not covered in mud and dirt."  
I made a face to myself, trying not to think that Tate was always right and I would never get the chance to prove him wrong because of it.  
"So you like it?" he assumed.  
"I hate it." I grumbled, just to make him upset. I wasn't sure why I was suddenly trying to be mean. It was like I was fighting with the idea of actually enjoying time with someone like Tate, rather than going home to N.  
"You love it." he corrected.  
I pursed my lips and tied the final string around my back. I reached for the doorknob and unlocked it before looking in the mirror.  
"What do you think?" I opened the door.  
His silver eyes flickered with delight and he smiled at me. "I wonder if my attire will compare."  
I knew that was as good as any compliment he would give me, so I took it without question. And I did indeed look fantastic in this dress. A little slutty, a little beautiful, and a little unique. It was perfect. I looked at Tate in the mirror for a long moment, scanning him up and down.  
He was in a pair of dark jeans. They were the expensive kind, and somewhat tight on his hips. Over his chest was the plain white tank top, also tight over his well muscled chest. I had seen him shirtless before, but I never really paid attention to how firm he really was.  
"Well you don't exactly have the same look as this." I pointed at myself in the mirror. His smile widened.  
"I didn't want to outshine you, but I do have a jacket." He turned, shaking his head and left the bathroom. I watched him go; trying to think of how I would have to tell him that I couldn't do this. I had to go home and see N…  
"Why are we getting all dressed up to go see where you grew up?" I asked, fallowing him and tugging on the ends of the dress to make sure it wasn't rising up in the back.  
"I changed my mind about that. I want to take you somewhere more appropriate instead."  
I scowled. "You know, Tate… I have to tell you… I just… I don't think that I can do this." I twined my fingers awkwardly together and stared at the floor. My eyes darted up for a split second, flashed at Tate, then went straight back down before I could register the look he was giving me.  
I whipped my head back up and my cheeks grew red. He looked…  
Sexy…  
My swallowed hard, seeing the black studded leather jacket he wore. It had quite a few zippers and pockets, and there were buckles on the cuffs and shoulders. The collar was smoothed down and I could see that the largest zipper in the front had a few chain links dangling from it. Tate ran a hand through his slicked back hair, disappointment flooding his gaze.  
"You owe me twenty four hours." He stated calmly.  
"Yeah… but… I—I just." Could that dream have simply been a side affect from Oddish's sleep powder?  
His silver eyes bore into mine. "Why do you want to go back now?"  
I couldn't quite answer him.  
"You feel like being yelled at by your mother for nothing?" he snorted. "Or is it your little pet you are feeling sorry for?"  
I forced myself to glower. "I love N… he's not my pet." But my voice was weak. That terrible dream was haunting me. I could no longer picture N's gentle green gaze, and that terrified me. All I could see was anger and hate... it made me more determined to get home, but at the same time it made me want to run away and hide.  
"And you are not allowed to go out with a friend for the day?" he challenged, his voice icy.  
"Is that what you are?" I crossed my arms and pouted. "Because friends don't usually hold friends hostage."  
"You lost a bet." His mouth twitched, and I realized he was slowly creeping forward, pushing his eyes even further into mine. I couldn't look away.  
"I—I know." I bit my lower lip. "But this is wrong…"  
"Say's who?"  
"Me…"  
"So that's it then?" he blinked and I could feel, with a jolt of fear that his cold fingers were slipping around my wrist. I curled my hand up into a tight fist and my eyebrows came together.  
"What?"  
"You think this is wrong?"  
"I… I don't… I don't know." Was this wrong? Was my enjoying time with Tate wrong? If it wasn't wrong would I feel this guilty? But at the same time it wasn't as if I couldn't have friends just because I was on love with N…  
And he was right about my mother… she had no right to yell at me when I had done nothing wrong.  
"Look my in the eyes and tell me this is wrong." Tate hissed, his face very close to mine.  
I shivered and couldn't open my mouth, so I just shook my head.  
"No?" he whispered.  
I nodded.  
"It's not wrong." Tate insisted.  
With a painful surrender I nodded again, defeat making my throat tight. As much as I didn't want to believe it, this wasn't wrong. We weren't doing anything…  
N was the one haunting my dreams…  
Mienshao didn't even trust him! There had to be a good reason why she was weary, and a little while longer without him, enough time to clear my head, wouldn't do any harm. I had run off plenty of times and I always came back. No one would really be worried about me anyways.  
Tate smiled and released his hand from my wrist. The raw look in his eyes faded and he took a step back. "First I'm taking you to dinner."  
Horror struck me square in the chest.  
"And then we are going dancing, considering you are so willing to make fun of me." he reminded gently, of the night I had seen him dancing with Froslass. I had actually found it adorable…  
But not this. "That sounds too much like a date. I would rather go see where you grew up." I didn't move, stubbornly waiting for his reaction to this. Of course he had to have expected me to put up a fight, the look in his eyes made me want to pull my hair out.  
"But its not." He said simply. This boy was bound and determined to make me crazy!  
He knew damn well that this was a date!

Well I had to admit, though it pains me to say, I had a great time tonight…  
Tate had made me laugh, cry, and try a spicy kind of pasta that I never in a million years would have wanted to try. Sure it sounds strange, but trust me it was even stranger at the time, when he pinned me down across the table and fed it to me. The whole restaurant had been staring, but it surely broke the ice. I had been laughing ever since, having forgotten all about N and that horrible dream.  
Tate took me to a place to dance almost as soon as we finished, just like he said he would. And let me tell you, he knew how to dance. I had never seen someone move so fluently through a crowd of people. It had even shocked me when he interrupted another pair, stole the chick, twirled her and then sent her disoriented back to her date. She had been happy, but I was stabbed with jealousy at the time.  
This was the only part of the night that made me feel guilty. I had started out forcing them away and forcing myself to have a good time, but that passed quickly into a genuine enjoyment. I wasn't stressing out, I wasn't thinking about that dream, and I wasn't worried about why Tate was determined to take me out on a date. Because it wasn't a date, no matter how much you might think so… I had to convince myself of this.  
It had turned out that I wasn't the best at slow dancing, and I wasn't quite ready to be that close to Tate either, were I would have to look into his eyes. So I had turned the tables on him and made him take me to a club instead. Here I felt a much larger and consistent stabbing of jealousy. Every girl in that place was eyeing Tate. I knew I had no right to be jealous, it was stupid of me to be in the first place, but I couldn't fight it either.  
Something else had come over me at the club as well; a mass of guys, all ages. Tate sent them all away one after another, giving them death threats and glares from Hell. No one bothered me when he was at my side, except for him himself. A strange electric current seemed to be sparking between us, always aware of where we were, always watching from the corner of our eyes. I can't tell you how many times we had made eye contact and both flushed.  
All of this was unsettling and hard to swallow and wonderful at the same time, but the worst part was that I felt completely at ease with Tate. It was natural to be with him… easy…  
My mind was whirling as he brought me back to our hotel room, which I had never realized was our place to stay for the night. My stomach churned with butterfree and I couldn't help but look at him as we teleported to the balcony overlooking the city. Lights flickered and danced below us as a warm wind brushed my hair across to Tate's shoulder.  
He grasped the railing and leaned over, looking at the world below us. There were people rushing around, always busy and never slowing to just take a deep breath. We hadn't managed to avoid the crowds tonight either, which kind of made me want to throw something at them. City people weren't always the nicest folk.  
"What was your favorite part of tonight?" I asked Tate without thinking.  
"I don't think it's happened yet." He murmured, eyes glimmering like silver stars. I wasn't sure what that was supposed to mean.  
"Well… so far?"  
"Watching you dirty dance." He chuckled "I never thought I would be the classier one."  
"Hey, just because I know how to dirty dance doesn't mean you have more class than me." I teased. It was true though, he had proven himself worthy of some serious class tonight. Not only because he took me slow dancing and was good at it, but because never once had he made me feel uncomfortable or tried to hard.  
He laughed. "Right, right." The sarcasm was thick in his voice. He looked down at me though, suddenly becoming serious. "Did you have a good time tonight?"  
I sighed and nodded. "I did actually… A better time than I've had since…" I had to stop and think back to that day in Nimbasa when N and I had our first kiss. Something snagged on my heart and tripped up my thought process. The flood gates of guilt opened and I had to look away.  
"In a while." I finished lamely.  
He ignored the falter in my voice. "I think that's the best time I've had since I was alive. Maybe even the best time I've had ever."  
I felt flattered, but covered it with a yawn.  
"How are you tired?" Tate rolled his eyes. "You slept plenty."  
"Like you have anything else planned." I waved my hand at him, dismissive, and turned my eyes back onto the city below. It really was stunning. The first time I had come here Bianca, Cheren and I had pitched in to get a fancy hotel room just so we could feel on top of the world. It was a memory that I thought very kindly of, but was bittersweet because it was so long ago. When I had first met N… back when I still hated him.  
"I have plenty of things we can do, but none of them sound as nice as watching you sleep." Tate nudged me affectionately with his shoulder before turning and heading into the hotel room. I stayed on the patio for a long moment, looking up at the faint stars and trying to think things through without being overwhelmed.  
Tomorrow around ten I would be going back home and facing my mother. I would go back to N and make sure he was ok, but I would also have to go back to avoiding Tate. Not because I wanted to avoid him, but because him and N being near each other wasn't a good match. What if Tate didn't want to go back? Surely he was tired of staying in an uncomfortable guest room anyways?  
Now that I thought about it… Tate really had no reason of staying with me and my mother and N anyways. Something twisted in the pit of my stomach. I realized with a start that I didn't want Tate to leave…  
"Are you going to make me sleep outside?" His voice made me jump, as I wasn't expecting it. I looked back at him.  
"Or do you want to?"  
I knew he was just joking, but it really did make something jump in me. A strange flicker of… excitement? I tried to hide my scowl but couldn't. My face twisted down. "I… I don't suppose either of us has to sleep outside."  
He was perfectly composed. "Should I bring a pillow into the bathtub?"  
I knew he was just trying to get me to let him sleep in the bed, and it disturbed me to know that he would be uncomfortable somewhere while I took up one fourth of the huge bed. It was kind of pointless… but at the same time…  
How could I just let him sleep in the same bed with me?  
"You get the left side." I muttered, storming past him into the room. I didn't miss the flash of brilliance cross his face.  
"There should be pajamas in that black back somewhere!" He yelled back at me as I headed for the bathroom. What a surprise… he packed everything, even for the night.  
I flinched as I dug through the pockets, pulling back zippers until I came across a brush and the pajamas he must have been talking about. To my relief they were simple. Shorts and a T shirt.  
It seemed like all night Tate had been silently proving me wrong, almost as if it was on purpose. Every time I found a reason to doubt him, or a reason to think he was being a pervert, he just went ahead and pulled something off. I had been keeping tabs on it all night, and the looks he was giving me made me think he was too.  
He had thought of every which way things could have turned and prepared for it. He was too good… too conniving and perfect when it came to these kinds of things.  
I got dressed hastily, washed my face with cold water and sweet smelling soap, then ran the brush through my hair with quite some effort. The snarls came out after a few moments.  
Going back out into the main room was probably one of the easiest and hardest things I had to do. I felt like I was betraying N, but at the same time… I couldn't explain it. Tate was already lying in bed with the same tank top he wore all day, but he had replaced the jeans with black sweats. At least he covered himself.  
He shut the lights off as I walked over and slipped under the top layer of sheets. I didn't say anything to him at first, but the desire to hear his voice made me prickle with annoyance.  
"Good night." I said stiffly.  
"Touko…"  
"What?"  
"I have a plan."  
I turned then, completely surprised, to look at him. He rolled to his side and was facing me, propped up on one arm. "What?" I asked in confusion.  
"I decided I will help you defeat team Plasma." He whispered, his hand reaching forward. He brushed my hair back behind me ear and sighed.  
"Tate… I… thank you!" I choked with surprise. I knew Tate cared about me of course, but for the first time it felt real… like his fingertips on my cheek. And I didn't flinch this time, I embraced it. The cool texture made my head whirl.  
"I will tell you about it tomorrow." He said quietly, pulling his hand back. I watched in the low glow of the city out the window, as he put his fingertips to his lips. He then brought them back up to my cheek without hesitation and brushed a kiss as light as a feather across my face. A cold shiver ran up my spine.  
"Good night Touko." He whispered, a very faint trace of sorrow lingering in his tone.


	36. Chapter 36

Nothing of the last twenty four hours felt even remotely real. Not the way my mother yelled at me, or Kayne re-catching his Garchomp, or me having that nightmare, or the evening out with Tate. Especially not that…  
Now that the morning had come I had to face the fact that I had pretty much cheated on N last night. It hurt so much I thought I would stop breathing. Never before had guilt done so much to me, and I kept reverting back to the dream to try and make this ok. Something was wrong with N… there was something that Mienshao had been trying to warm me about and it had to do with him, and I was using this as an excuse.  
What would N do when Tate and I showed up, having run off together? I felt sick…  
He didn't deserve this! I had to fight back tears as Tate got the black bag from the bathroom. This was wrong… I promised I would protect him… not leave him.  
Crypt wafted over to my side, having felt the change of atmosphere. He gave me a aerie nudge in the shoulder to try and cheer me up, but it didn't work. I sighed and raised my hand to the Mismagius and let it run through his body. He made that strange purring noise he always did when he was happy.  
"So what is the plan?" Tate's low, disappointed voice caught me off guard. Neither of us was in the best mood this morning. I knew he was upset because he liked spending time with me much more than he should, and he knew I was upset because I was horribly guilty. I appreciated that he didn't bring it up though.  
"I don't know how to tell them…"  
"Tell them what?" Tate sat on the edge of the bed next to me. "Where you were?"  
I nodded. "And I'm going to hurt N so much. I know you don't care but—  
"Who said I don't care?" he stopped me. "Obviously this is bothering you, and I care about that."  
"But you don't care about how I feel for N."  
"You think you love him." He assumed.  
"No, Tate. I DO love him." My shoulders sagged and I pinched the bridge of my nose, willing my headache to go away. "Yesterday shouldn't have happened."  
I could feel his pain in the air between us, and I surely wasn't expecting him try and comfort me. He leaned over and wrapped his arm around my waist, setting his chin on my shoulder. I could feel how cold his chest was against my shoulder and I shivered as he brought me into a tight hug.  
"Would it make a difference if I told you that I love you?" he said half-heartedly. "Would it make a difference if I said the only reason I will help you defeat team plasma is because I love you?"  
I nodded. "That's making this so much harder."  
He pushed his face into my neck and took a long breath. "Do you want me to leave? You know I am under your order… I'm your servant; I have to do as you say."  
"That has never stopped you before." I tipped my head back, revealing my throat to his lips.  
"Are you changing the subject?" he murmured.  
"We can't do this." I shook my head, forcing N into my vision. "I can't let you love me."  
"So you do want me to leave?" he wound both arms around me. Chills rolled up my shoulders and made my skin tingle. The pain in his voice was real, and I realized that no matter how many times he had disobeyed me before, he really would do anything for me. He loved me…  
Picture N… Picture N, I ordered to myself. His perfect green eyes… his lanky figure… his love for pokemon… his terrible past. I said I would protect him… I promised. And all I could picture was the hate in his eyes from that dream.  
Where was Mienshao now? When I needed her to guide me most?  
"Touko." He lifted his face from my neck but looked down at the ground. I caught a glimpse of how solemn his eyes were. "Do you want me to leave?" he demanded.  
"No." I shook my head. "I—don't."  
"Why?"  
"Because I think I love you…"

~N~

How was I supposed to tell Touko?  
I sat in the same living room that her mother had sent her storming up to her room in, waiting for her to come back like everyone said she would. I had been out on my own looking for quite some time, but it turned out being more than I could handle. The region… it was fine.  
Everyone; Cheren, Bianca, their parents, even Touko herself made everything seem like it was in ruins, but going about and seeing the lives of people without pokemon for myself… it wasn't nearly as hazardous as I expected. Everyone made it seem like people were dying because of what Plasma had done. I really saw no harm…  
How was I going to tell Touko that I was having second thoughts? Life would be good right now if she was here with me and we weren't planning an attack. I had been out for hours searching the different cities and routes for any sign of her and the only pokemon I had seen in pain was that one in the arms of a "homeless" boy. The Patrat had died, right in front of me because it was with that boy…  
This was the only pokemon that I had seen with a human partner, and it was the only one in pain. All the wild pokemon I had come across were perfectly happy and well. So what was I to assume?  
Now that I thought back to all those things shoved into my brain growing up… nothing seemed all that off from the real world. I didn't want to go back of course, I would never go back to Plasma, but was liberation really that horrible?  
I was second guessing everything that I had been raised to believe, and now I was second guessing everything Touko ever got be to believe. I didn't know who was right and wrong and I didn't know what to think. All I know what that a pokemon had lost its like today because of a human. It was moments like this that made me sure I wasn't one of them.  
Touko would hate me for wanting to go back on our mission…  
I was faced with a terrible decision. Do I go back to everything I used to believe in and give up Touko? Or do I keep Touko for myself and watch the world fall to pieces around me?  
"N." Touko's mother called to me from the other room. I nearly jumped out of my skin. The hairs on my arms rose, reminding me how afraid of her I was.  
"Ye—yes ma'am?" I didn't turn to look, but spoke as clearly as I could manage.  
There was the sound of the front door opening and I could see her standing with a suite case in the reflection of the television. I stared in shock as she spoke.  
"You tell Touko to call me when she has done what she needs to do." Her mother whispered and sniffed. I watched in the reflection of the black screen as she wiped her arm across her face and forced away the tears. "Tell her I'm sorry..."  
You and me both, I thought with a heavy blow to the chest.  
"Tell her I love her but I have to leave while she does this… I wont be apart of something that I don't believe it… but I wont stop her either."  
Tears were pooling in my eyes, a new found respect for the woman that raised Touko. I had never realized until now that the two of them were very similar. They both had headstrong and determined personalities, and they both loved with all their hearts. I swallowed.  
"I—I will te—tell her." a hot tear slid down my cheek as she shut the front door and left.  
Was it possible for two people who loved each other so much to have different beliefs? Was it possible to pursue different ideals together at the same time? Her mothers words echoed in my mind.  
I love her but I have to leave while she does this.  
Can you love and leave someone at the same time?  
I won't stop her.  
I swallowed again, suddenly realizing that loving someone must mean more than just being with them. Loving someone wasn't all just kisses and nights of passion and hopes and dreams. Loving someone was much more complicated than that. And here I thought it was all so simple.  
I knew what I had to do now.


	37. Chapter 37

~Kayne~

I knew about the whole "twenty four hour" thing between Touko and my brother, and I knew Touko well enough to know that she would be perfectly on time when she went home.  
I had been with Tate and her after she helped me re-capture my Garchomp, but she didn't know I had been there. She fell asleep for quite some time, and when I came back after dropping Garchomp off at a pokemon center in Kanto Tate was more than willing to have someone to talk to.  
I had never seen my brother with such high spirits before, even at the peak of our existence. The look in his eyes and the way he spoke of Touko made me want to feel it. He was in love, no questions asked. We had talked for an hour or so about this, but also about the reasons behind what had happened before.  
I wasn't sure if Tate forgave me for bringing Touko back to the Plasma castle to get N, and I never had the balls to ask him directly, but it felt better all the same. We were on speaking terms, which was good. He couldn't stay mad at me anyways, I was his favorite brother. Even if Bobby wasn't much competition.  
Speaking of which, we had discussed Bobby for quite some time. And we had come to the recognition that he was dangerous. The whole Team Rocket deal didn't seem to be working out for him. I had gotten the chance to see him when I was in Kanto looking for my Garchomp, and he told me about leaving Rocket for good. I knew that it was never going to work out for him, but when I thought back to the day me and Tate found him locked in a cage, he had seemed so sure.  
There was a growing taste of hate towards Bobby for making Tate take care of me so that he could be with Team Rocket, and now he was quitting. It wasn't as if watching out for me was his top priority now either. Bobby never did anything for me; he had always treated me like I was just baggage. And seeing him this last time proved that again.  
"Shouldn't you be with Tate?" he had said, mentally able to tell that Tate wasn't even in the same region.  
"I died Bobby… I think I can handle myself." I had retorted with scorn.  
"Died? Already?" his face was smug. "Neither you are Tate resisted it very long."  
I couldn't understand when Bobby had said that… as if he was happy about it, or knowing that he had lasted the longest with his real life gave him some cheap pride. He didn't care about me… he didn't even know me.  
I felt like I had grown a lifetime in the short months of fallowing Tate around and helping Touko. I wasn't the younger brother anymore… I knew this, but Bobby just didn't get it. I would only ever be the younger brother to him, and this disturbed me. Didn't he see how much I had changed?  
I had told him that I was out in Kanto looking for Garchomp, determined to find him regardless of me being a ghost or not. He had said that my pokemon was a waste of time and that I wouldn't be helping myself.  
Oh how I wished he was here now… to see the way my pokemon obeyed me, even more so than before. I HAD caught him, I had done what Tate couldn't, I pulled off something that no one believed I could. He would have to understand me now.  
A low rumbling in the sky brought with it the promise of summer rain, but it was very far off, still over the ocean while I stood around the side of Touko's house. I could barely see the gray clouds, so I didn't think much of it.  
I wanted to see Touko so I could thank her for helping me. That was why I had gone to hers and Tate's hotel room in the first place when she was asleep. Without her Samorott there was no telling how far Garchomp would have run, or how much more he would have turned to attack me. The only thing that had been working in my favor before Touko helped me was the barbed wire that he had run blindly into.  
Don't get me wrong, I would have chased Garchomp to the edge of the earth. He was my pride and joy regardless of being alive or not… and I wasn't about to let the little shit get away that easily.  
I curled my hand around the rough and old pokeball hanging from a chain around my neck. "You better not disobey me again." I said softly to the ball. It bounced twice against my chest when I let it fall and looked across the yard to where Touko suddenly appeared.  
I watched in surprise as Tate stalled, not releasing her. His arms were around her waist, his face inches from hers. I raised my eyebrows, anticipating the kiss probably as much as Touko was, but knowing my brother better than that. He stalled again, sliding his arms out from around her as she said something. I was too far away to hear what it was, but the disappointment on both their faces told me it wasn't good. What had happened?  
Tate pushed his lips against Touko's cheek for a split second before teleporting away to who knows where. I watched, my heart sinking for my brother and apparently for Touko too. She didn't move from her spot at the edge of the yard, but brought her hand up instead to touch the place my brother kissed her. The pain in her eyes was amazing and I had to reconsider ever wanting to be in love with someone.  
Sure it seemed nice to have someone to be with and that makes you happy, but the pain looked like too much bear. I doubted I would ever know the reasons behind someone loving someone else just to get hurt in the end. I didn't understand it now, not even while it was right in front of me, walking up the porch with her head down.  
"Touko!" I called, stepping out from around the fence. She gasped, the hand on her cheek flying to her chest. The panic in her eyes faded almost as quickly as it had passed, and she glowered when she realized it was me.  
"Don't do that to me Kayne!" She said in a hushed voice. "What are you doing here?"  
"Well… two reasons. One I want to thank you for helping me re-catch Garchomp. And two… how was last night?"  
Her face fell. "You're welcome. But… I don't really want to talk about it now."  
"Uh oh." I shook my head and reached out to put my arm around her shoulders. "What happened?"  
She looked up at me with her dark blue eyes. They were sad… pained. "Nothing… I had a great time. That's the problem." She pulled away from me and reached for the door knob. "But it's over now."  
I blinked in surprise, knowing that talking to her would be pointless now. She obviously didn't want anything to do with me or her emotions right now. My heart flickered. I had nothing against N, but I loved my brother more and I knew that this girl was making him happy. So I knew I had to get to the bottom of this.  
Without hesitation I flickered, teleporting away to where I felt Tate would be.

~Tate~

Cursing I punched the nearest wall. There was a faint, unsatisfying thud as it was from the insulated part where no one wanted to hear noises from the other room. This made me even angrier I punched it again, harder. I punched it again; a louder thud. I punched it again, leaving a strip of red against the pale olive color.  
"Tate!" Kayne's shocked voice made me whirl. I could feel cold blood drip down my fingers from where I had split my knuckles open.  
"Jesus Christ bro, what are you doing?" He walked over to me and examined the chips in the wall. I groaned and slid down to be sitting, head in my hands. My hand throbbed.  
"She loves me." I shook my head slowly.  
"Isn't that a good thing?" Kayne crossed his arms and looked down at me like I was something pitiful. I could see Gengar and Froslass from the corner of my eye where they were itching to come over. I had let them out just before taking Touko home.  
"Sure it's a good thing. It's everything I wanted…" I couldn't comprehend the way I felt though. It was almost like because I knew she really did love me, it hurt more to see her go. And here I was, giving her every opportunity to love N more than me.  
"I just saw her now, I wanted to thank her for helping me catch Garchomp; she didn't look all that thrilled to be going home." Kayne sat down across from me and crossed his legs. It may have been a vague attempt at trying to make me feel better, but it didn't work.  
"Last night was perfect." I mumbled, remembering how easily she had let herself come to me. I knew she loved me, and I had gotten her to realize it too. It was the fact that she still had to go back to N that made me rage. I knew she wouldn't have just given up on him as soon as she admitted to loving me, but it still stung like a beedrill.  
"I woke up this morning and she was deliberately next to me, Kayne… I know you don't know what that feels like, but it's every bit as painful as it is amazing." I couldn't explain it well enough. "It's like you are enjoying the moment so much, but in the back of your mind you know you have to give it up in the end. You have to trade your own happiness for someone else's."  
"I don't know how this crap works, Tate. But… isn't that what you are supposed to do for the people you care about?"  
I shot him a deathly glare. "I'm not talking about her! I'm talking about the King. Touko is perfectly happy with me, I saw that last night, but now I have to give her up because she has to make him happy. It's not her happiness I'm trading for mine, if it was I wouldn't be upset, but it's his!"  
Kayne didn't seem to know what to say. He just scowled. "Since when are you so selfless?"  
I snorted, my mind whirling back to the days of saving Kayne's ass, most of the time from himself. "I have always been selfless, you are just now noticing."  
He frowned at me and changed the subject. "So what do you plan on doing now? Didn't you say you were going to help her fight team Plasma?"  
It was true, the one thing that I had on my side now… the one thing that would make Touko realize that I was always going to be there for her was fighting team Plasma. This wasn't hard for me, considering that I had dreamed about destroying everything that pitiful force had since the day I had been a part of it. I used to stay up late at night, wondering why my hair was fading to white, wondering why my heartbeat was starting to hurt, and planning their downfall.  
What was hard about this was the fact that I had always planned out those downfalls with N in my hands. I remembered how much I wanted to see his blood, how much I wanted to ring his neck for what he did to me. N was the king, the boy who never lifted more than a pen in his life. All those papers signed for liberation, all those public announcements, and all the days I had been assigned to protect N.  
So you could imagine how hard it was, not for me to help Touko ruin team Plasma, but for me not to ruin N as well.  
I nodded to Kayne, almost forgetting his question.  
"Can I ask you something…?" he spoke with a maturity I had never noticed before. For the first time I seemed to realize that little Kayne, my younger brother, was now something bigger than that. The childish light in his eyes was gone.  
I nodded.  
"Alright, don't hit me or anything, but… what do you have against N anyways?" He flinched as he said this.  
I just stared at my bloody hand and challenged. "Why don't you have anything against N?"  
"I… I guess because it never bothered me as much as before. My life wasn't so great before I joined the Shadow triad anyways."  
"So there you go." I choked. "That's why I hate him… He took everything from me."  
Kayne just looked at me, his off-white eyes dull with misunderstanding.  
I took a deep breath. "Do you remember when you first joined the Triad, and all we ever did was fallow N around?"  
He nodded.  
"And then you remember having to bring Touko to him? Remember the time in Chargestone cave?"  
He nodded again.  
"I had just died." I summoned up the memory with effort. "Literally that morning. I begged N to put me out of my misery. I begged him for some time, any time at all to gather myself, but he just…" I clenched my teeth, remembering his exact words.  
"You have a job to do now get up!" the king had told me, a moment before kicking me in the side. I remembered digging my fingers into the carpet and clutching at his pant leg. Saliva had been pouring from my mouth like a waterfall because of the pain, my head had throbbed, and my ribs were then bruised. The king didn't care.  
"You wonder why I made Bobby the leader of the Shadow triad and not you!" N had demanded, the fury rising in his voice while I dry heaved, trying to get the blood out of my stomach. "This is why! Because you don't what you are told when you are told!"  
"He just what?" Kayne brought me out of the memory.  
I shook my head and opened my mouth to speak. "He just told me to suck it up and do as I was told."  
"And you did It." it wasn't a question, nor a statement. Kayne remembered… how irritated I had been that day in the cave. He understood now.  
"I did. And that was the day I decided that hated him more than anything else in the world. More than Ghetsis himself, I vowed that I would get back at him." I interrupted my raging with a dark laugh. Kayne looked at me like I was going crazy.  
"We brought Touko to N that day. You remember?"  
"Of course."  
"Kayne, I didn't even know her name but seeing her beat him in battle… watching her crush his hopes and dreams…"  
"You fell in love with her." he assumed.  
"At first I just fell in love with what she did… But time after time, seeing her and bringing her to N just to watch her beat him, it was the most rewarding part of being with Team Plasma."  
"I remember… that day on the bridge." Kayne mused. "You just teleported away from me and Bobby and appeared right in front of her. We thought you had gone crazy when you grabbed her and teleported her twenty feet to N."  
I smiled half-heartedly, remembering that I had been so excited to watch her beat N that I couldn't wait the time it would have taken her to walk that bridge. I just had to get her there as soon as possible. Bobby had been livid that I stepped out of line that day, but I had never quite cared. I was supposed to be leader of the group to begin with, the decision was rightfully mine.  
"I couldn't get that battle started soon enough." I said to Kayne, raising my head to look at him. "But I actually didn't LOVE her until she defeated N once and for all… until she gave up her Mienshao in that battle, just to stop him. I had never been so happy to see team Plasma fail. You didn't know it at the time, that we were to fallow the successor, and you didn't know that was why Bobby left."  
Kayne's shook his head. "I can't believe I fallowed Bobby… I should have stayed with you from the beginning."  
I shrugged. "You were a stupid kid."  
"I never realized just how terrible team Plasma was." he mumbled.  
There was a moment of silence as we both remember the days of working for the terrible group. Surely Kayne had his own personal hate towards them.  
"Well that's settled then!" He suddenly brought his hand up to the pokeball around his neck. He gripped it tightly as if willing Garchomp to give him strength.  
"What?"  
"I want to help you stop them."  
An evil grin slipped across my face and I stared at Kayne, my spirits rising. Of course I wanted very badly to get revenge on N and everything he'd ever done to me, but having Kayne at my side suddenly made resisting easier. It may have been the fact that I knew he understood now, that he wasn't just a little brother anymore. Or it could have been because finally someone shared my hate. Either way I was satisfied.  
"I knew there was a reason you were my favorite." I hissed.


	38. Chapter 38

"Hello?" I called softly, my stomach churning and my cheek tingling from where Tate had pressed his lips to me. My hands were literally trembling.  
"Touko?" N's voice was the first I heard, and it sent a terrible shudder up my spine. He appeared into the entryway a heartbeat later and his face was clouded with worry and grief. A familiar lull pulled me forward and I just had to wrap my arms around him, but the look he gave stopped me. I stood rigid, trying to figure out what to say.  
"Touko I… I have to tell you… something." N wouldn't look me in the eyes. I felt sick, knowing that he was going to hate me. He would never love me after he knew that I was falling for Tate…  
I hated myself more than anything right now, I wanted to curl up in a ball and just let everything come crashing down on me. It felt like my world was ending.  
"Me too." I run a hand through my messy hair and bit my lip.  
"Me first." N insisted, turning from the entryway and going into the living room. He stalled, standing next to the couch before sitting down and taking a deep breath. He gestured with his eyes for me to sit, and when I did I was on the edge of my seat.  
"Your mother left." he whispered, still not looking at me. "She wanted me to tell you that she loves you… but she said she couldn't stay and be a part of something she doesn't believe in."  
Was this what he wanted to tell me? I felt like a sit down talk would be something more dramatic than that. My mother was like me, when she had to get away she had to get away. There was no stopping her; I understood that because I had felt what she was feeling before. Still, guilt gnawed at my chest.  
"Oh…" was all I said.  
"And… Touko." N's face came up, a desperate look in his pale eyes. He looked unkempt and tired. Dark circles formed under his eyes and his skin was lacking color.  
"What?" I whispered, wanting to reach forward and take his face in my hands. I wanted to kiss him and make it better. I wanted to protect him; I wanted to be there for him! It hurt to know that this internal dilemma was making me helpless. He didn't need me for this… he just needed strength in himself.  
"I went out looking for you…" he began, and those words alone set my heart aflame with ache. I was about to blurt out an apology but he continued. "And I realized that the world we are living in… it isn't as bad as I thought it was."  
I blinked, the sudden misunderstanding making my head whirl. I could nearly feel the Patrat stop turning in my brain. What did this have to do with me?  
"Touko, everyone kept telling me that things were horrible… that people weren't happy and couldn't be happy without pokemon, but… everyone I saw was perfectly fine. And the one person I saw that wasn't fine… their pokemon died… right in front of my eyes!" his voice was shrill.  
I couldn't comprehend what he was trying to tell me. Inside of me was a growing conflict, which was fighting the desire to let his words get to me. I looked away, my eyebrows furrowing.  
"N… I—  
"I don't want to do this anymore." He cut me off.  
My heart skipped a beat. "Do what anymore?" I nearly choked on the words. Was this it? Was N leaving me for good? Maybe he had seen me with Tate when I didn't realize it? Was it when I was getting spicy pasta shoved down my throat? Slow dancing to a Lady A song? Or grinding up against Tate in the club with guys and girls hovering like frantic beedrill? I held my breath waiting for his answer.  
"Go against team Plasma." N spoke with a certainty I hadn't heard since he was liberating himself.  
The panic subsided in an instant, as soon as I knew that he wasn't talking about us, but it was replaced with a fiery burning. Anger hissed and sizzled in my fingertips and I scowled at him.  
"You want to let them keep liberating? You want to let them take over everything!" my voice rose and I could see how hard it was for him not to flinch.  
"It's not that bad though…" he whispered in a weak attempt to defend himself.  
"Do you realize what has been going on for the past months? Year?" I curled my hands up into fists and my shoulders grew rigid. "Do you know how many businesses have gone bankrupt? How many kids have given up their hopes and dreams! How many people lost pokemon just because of fighting?"  
For the first time in a very long time I pushed the blame of Mienshao's death on N. Fury brought tears to my eyes. "N, I lost my Mienshao fighting YOU! How many others have lost their partners, there friends, their FAMILY! Because of team Plasma?"  
He couldn't answer me, his eyes were dark, almost as dark as in that dream. I didn't quite care though anyways.  
"Cheren lost his pokemon, Professor Juniper, me… and you still believe that this is the right thing to do?"  
He jaw was clenched tight but he nodded. "I—I'm not saying I will stop you… from doing what you have to… but I don't— don't want to be a part of it…" I could see his hands trembling as he spoke.  
"Why? N, why!" I could feel all the betrayal lining up and being knocked down inside of me. Tears slipped over my cheeks and I took note, that this was NOT the conversation I thought I would be having with him. "After everything they did to you? They used you your whole life! Where is your vengeance?"  
"I can't fight for something I don't believe in."  
I shook my head, feeling absolutely stupid for even trying to compromise. It seemed the innocent man I had fallen in love with during the past few months was suddenly gone, retreated back to his days as Lord N. The worst part was the truth was as clear as day in his eyes; he really did believe that liberation was right…  
"So what now?" my lower lip trembled. "What do you plan on doing?"  
He couldn't answer me, which just edged the anger on in my chest. I felt like I was being stabbed.  
"I can't believe you." I whispered. "I promised I would protect you… I saved your ass! I stood up for you when no one else would!" the tears were gushing now. "I love you."  
His cloudy, wet eyes came up then for a split second and I knew he was about to say it back. He wanted to tell me he loved me, but I didn't give him the chance. With a heavy whimpering I stood up and whirled away, heading for the door.  
How could he do this to us?


	39. Chapter 39

It had been two horribly long days since me and N had our downfall, and I had come to the conclusion that I deserved this. It was some terrible karma for spending those twenty four hours with Tate. I should have never left; N would have never made the choice he did if he hadn't had gone out looking for me. If I wouldn't have made that stupid bet…  
I had been so willing to do anything for Tate to help me with this mission to destroy team Plasma that I hadn't thought it through. I lost a battle that could have been prevented in the first place. The more I thought about it, the more and more I went back on all the mistakes I ever made.  
I could have stayed in bed that night when Tate asked me to battle… I could have told him I didn't want to bet… I could have stopped my teenage angst from getting in the way of my logical thinking…  
Truth was I could have done a million things to stop what had happened to me and N… but the terrible reality was that I didn't.  
I had spent the last two nights crying on Bianca's shoulder while N profoundly came knocking on the door, trying to apologize, trying to make it ok when he knew it wasn't. I listened… but he never changed his mind, so it always resulted in the same painful argument and ending.  
We had different ideals… we always had.  
Cheren was sitting next to me, letting me watch him play solitaire on his old pokedex. It was the only thing I could handle at the moment, it was the only thing that kept my mind busy enough not to think about N and not to worry about Tate.  
Tate hadn't come around since that morning he left me in the yard of my house, telling me that things would be ok, and kissing me on the cheek. I had never felt so alone in my life...  
Thank goodness I still had Bianca and Cheren with me. Even if I knew that Tate was still on my side… his mysterious disappearances left me winded. And missing him didn't exactly help with anything. I was supposed to be pushing Tate aside to try and rekindle and chance I had left with N… not thinking about him just as much.  
Cheren leaned his head back against my shoulder and looked up at me with his pale gray-blue eyes. He pushed his glasses up further on his nose. "Did you hear that?" he murmured.  
"Hear what?" I looked around. If it was N again, knocking Bianca's front door surely I would lose my mind.  
"It was a thud." Cheren commented mildly then turned his head tours Bianca, who was curled up on the love seat with her Munna in her lap.  
"I heard it too." she perched her lips. "I will go look up stairs."  
Cheren watched her go with worried eyes as she climbed the stairs to the second floor of her house. Munna fallowed faithfully.  
"N may have tried coming in through the roof this time." Cheren spat sarcastically. I flinched at the name, though his dislike in N didn't bother me as much anymore; not while I was just as upset with him.  
"Dammit! Work on your landings!" A familiar hiss made my heart jerk. It was fallowed by Bianca's terrified squeal. With a gasp I shoved away from Cheren and flew to the staircase. Munna ran right into me, fallowing by Bianca, looking like she had just seen a ghost. The irony was she had.  
Tate was rubbing his head with his hand as he appeared at the top of the staircase. "You just never learn." He muttered, strolling down towards me with impending grace. A heavy weight lifted off my heart at the sight of him fallowed by his brother Kayne.  
"You're just a shitty teacher." Kayne shot back, but Tate's attention was on me now. A smile lightened his face and he held his arms out to me as he came to the bottom step.  
With sweet relief I slipped into the shape of him, wrapping my arms around his back and pressing my face to his chest. He set his chin on my shoulder, cheek against my neck and sighed.  
"Touko who are they!" Bianca was curled next to Cheren, Munna in her arms with fright. I didn't blame her, anyone who would have seen these two shirtless boys appear magically in there house would automatically think pervert.  
"Tate?" Cheren's eyes grew wide with the memory of his savior. I had forgotten myself that it was Tate who had rescued him from the dungeon of the plasma castle a while ago.  
Tate pulled his head back and nodded to Cheren.  
"Alright, come on, my turn." Kayne butted Tate out of the way and wrapped his strong arms around me. The first laugh escaped my lips in three days when he swung me around like a brother would his little sister. And I was older than him.  
I didn't miss Tate elbow Kayne when he set me down, dizzy with satisfaction.  
"Where have you guys been?" I demanded, mostly to Tate.  
"I told you I would help you." he answered quickly, eyeing Bianca and Cheren skeptically. He didn't know if they were in on it or not.  
"With Plasma?" Cheren perked up, abandoning his game of solitaire. Bianca still looked confused.  
I nodded to Tate with assurance.  
"We have a plan." Kayne was beaming, and made himself right at home by flopping down next to Bianca on the couch. I watched her flinch, but her eyes also were alight with curiosity. I didn't miss a thing as she eyed him up and down, her green eyes skimming over every white freckle he had.  
Something in my heart twisted the wrong way, one because I knew I would be going at this without N's support, and two because Tate walked away from my side to fallow Kayne. I fallowed him quickly as he sat in the love seat Bianca had been in before. There was no more room for me on the couch, but I didn't mind, or think twice about sitting on the edge of Tate's chair. He flashed me a tired, crooked smile.  
I noticed now how dirty his hair was, and how worn he looked. Him and Kayne both. Their eyes were somehow duller than normal too.  
"What have you been doing?" I murmured to Tate.  
"Scrounging around the Plasma castle." He shook his head and rolled his eyes. "It wouldn't have taken so long without Freckles over there."  
"Hey!" Kayne crossed his arms. "The plan won't work without me anyways."  
"What's the plan?" Cheren demanded, impatient.  
Tate took a deep breath as if to prepare himself for the speech. He ran a hand through his thick, knotted hair and closed his eyes for a half a second before beginning. "Alright, our initiative is to set the castle on fire with the sages inside."  
My heart lurched. "On—on fire?"  
Tate gave me a look of misunderstanding. He didn't know about the dream I had. "Yes. You see, when the castles alarms go off, all the doors and windows automatically lock. What we want to do is set off the alarms. No way in and no way out." he paused. "Unless of course you can teleport."  
Cheren and Bianca were listening intently, there eyes large. Kayne looked like he might be falling asleep. He looked just as exhausted as Tate.  
"Kayne is going to set off the alarm." Tate went on. "It should cause enough of a distraction to let me and you into the main control center of the castle. While everyone is distracted with who is breaking in or out we will have the chance to shut it all down."  
"What does that mean exactly?" Bianca piped up. "What are you going to shut down?"  
"The power. Touko and I will destroy it, and everything in that castle is run on electronics, so once those go down there is no way for them to catch us or find us. The doors and windows will be locked shut."  
"What are we going to do?" Bianca insisted, a young fire in her eyes.  
Kayne spoke up. "After I set off the alarm I'm going to teleport back to you and Cheren. I will give you the ok to attack but then I have to teleport back into the castle."  
"Attack?" Cheren grumbled. "With what?"  
"Pokemon of course."  
"I lost mine." He hissed, the memory of his beloved team being taken away from him and released flashed in his eyes.  
"You and Bianca will have to work together and keep an eye on each other." Tate refused to let his plan have fault. "Do you have a fire type?" he asked Bianca.  
"Emboar." She nodded. It was her strongest pokemon.  
"Perfect." Tate said quickly. "Then I suggest you let Cheren use your other pokemon and cover you. He will have to battle the guards outside of the castle while you take Emboar and start setting it on fire."  
"And I'm going back on the inside to start fires with Garchomp." Kayne added.  
"Once we know the power is completely shut off me and Touko will teleport back outside and help you guys." Tate glowered at everyone in the room, daring them to question his plan. His eyes stopped on Cheren. "You will have to hold off the guards and give Bianca a chance to do as much damage as she can before we escape."  
Cheren nodded, determination making him silent.  
Bianca looked somewhat frightened but didn't say anything. I knew exactly what she was thinking though. Smoke… fire… asthma.  
"Bianca will you be ok?" I wasn't about to let my childhood friend rush into battle just to go into an attack and risk her life.  
"I will be fine!" she said sternly. "I want to do something to help."  
"Well your job is just as important as anyone else's, if not more, we need you to help." Tate didn't realize how much that meant to her of course, he didn't know she had bad asthma and a family that forbid her from anything more dangerous than a friendly walk through the park. Her parents would be livid when they found out, but this was something she had to do. Bianca had been waiting for her chance to prove herself since the moment she got her first pokemon.  
"I still think me and Garchomp should set the power off, he would have less trouble destroying everything quickly."  
"No." Tate said sternly. "You have Garchomp but we have all of her pokemon and mine on our side." He pointed to me and shushed his brother when he went to say something again.  
"Sound good to everyone?" he demanded.  
My stomach was in a terrible knot. "What about N?" I just had to ask. Of course Tate didn't know about our downfall two days ago, but I wanted to hear what he had come up with anyways.  
"He wont be within sight of the castle… he can stay in the forest with his legendary in case we need to flee, but I don't want him near any of his former followers." The distrust was strong on his face.  
"N is going to come?" Bianca, not understanding, asked.  
Tate and Kayne both turned their eyes at me, one set confused and one set sparkling with evil ideas. Tate was trying not to smirk. "The king backed out?"  
"How did you know?" I frowned.  
"Let's just say I know him more than you think I do." He snorted. "Even so, we won't need him."  
Bianca and Cheren both looked a little disgruntled without the possible escape route, but no one said anything for a long moment. I hadn't realized until the silence made it awkward, that I had slid off the arm of the love seat and was squished halfway on top of Tate. I didn't notice that his arm was around my back as well, but I made no attempt to pull away. The safe feeling of someone protecting me made my heart feel warm again… even if the numbing of N was still in the back of my mind.  
"So when are we doing this?" Cheren was the first one to speak. We all looked to Tate, the leader of the mission… the rightful leader all along. It was too easy to picture him—now that I remembered—in those tight black clothes with his mouth covered and silver slits for eyes glaring out at the world. He should have been standing in front all along, in place of Bobby's charcoal colored eyes.  
Tate made eye contact with everyone of us before answering in a bone chilling tone.  
"Tomorrow night."


	40. Chapter 40

I sat on the roof of Bianca's house staring across the tiny town to my own abandoned house. N was the only way staying in there, and having given up on trying to make this ok, he was alone. My heart was aching like no one else could imagine it would, and I found it particularly hard to focus on my bedroom window, which was pointing in my direction.  
Up here where the stars seemed to touch me I could really think and truly breathe. There was a somewhat rough breeze coming from the south where the ocean lapped against the rocky shores, breaking the silence and lulling me into a peaceful mood. Despite the fact that tomorrow at this time I would be somewhere in Plasma's castle with blaring alarms going off and many, many people trying to kill me… I felt good. The most of my worries were actually focused on N alone in my house.  
What would he do when he found out that I attacked the Plasma castle without even telling him? Sure he said he wanted nothing to do with it anymore… but really? I didn't know what to think or make of this, and I was desperately trying to cling to the moment I was living in. It would have been far too easy to think about what would happen tomorrow night and after that.  
Me and N couldn't ignore each other forever…  
What was going to happen after we defeated team Plasma and I had to come home and call my mother and beg her to forgive me? What would happen when everything N had ever been raised to believe fell apart in front of him. If all went well tomorrow the Region would know that it was safe to own pokemon again. Professor Juniper would have her business once more, the pokemon centers would reopen, the gym leaders would come back, and everything would start to seem normal again.  
Except for N… he wouldn't be normal ever; he would be hurt and confused. So in a sense it felt like I was sacrificing his pain for the safety of others. And here I said I would protect him…  
And what would happen to us as a couple? Bianca and Cheren would want to go on and be pokemon trainers once again, Cheren especially, and they would want me to go with them. I came to the scary conclusion that there was nothing I wanted more than to travel once again with my pokemon. But would N really come with me?  
I couldn't be sure what the answer to that question would be. Traveling would involve meeting new ambitious trainers that wanted to battle, and having to face seeing pokemon lose and be hurt. It was a part of life… one that N didn't seem to belong in.  
"Touko?" a perfect and sexy voice sounded quietly from across the roof. I glanced up the slanted part of it and reflected against the half moon was Tate's figure. I could just make out his eyes as he came forward.  
Tate would want to travel with me… Tate would want to be a trainer himself and have battles and raise more ghost pokemon…  
"Hey." I whispered in a tired hoarse voice.  
"You know you aren't very easy to find sometimes." He comment mildly and sat by my side. Our bare arms touched. "I'm supposed to be your protector, your servant and you run away… a lot."  
I sighed, not in the best mood for his jokes and sarcasm.  
"Are you scared?" He murmured, obviously changing the subject to what he really wanted to talk about.  
With a heavy heart I nodded. "Yes… but not about tomorrow, I'm afraid of what is going to happen after tomorrow actually."  
"What are you thinking?" he asked gently. "What is making you afraid exactly?"  
I knew he wouldn't understand if I tried to tell him that I was afraid of losing N, so it was pretty much a dry subject.  
"Everything I guess." I said lamely.  
"Well… then lets not think about the future." He echoed my previous thoughts; only when he said it it sounded a lot easier to do.  
I looked him in the silver eyes as thick clouds rolled in the distance over the ocean. The summer breeze brought with it the smell of honey suckle and salt water. I could imagine the days when me and Cheren and Bianca used to sit out here. The memory was bitter sweet. It made me smile half-heartedly.  
"You know… when I was a kid all I ever wanted to be was a pokemon trainer. Nothing else in this world mattered… it was all about me and the things that I would achieve. Cheren, Bianca and I used to sneak out of our houses at night and sit up here to talk about what starter pokemon we would pick."  
Tate smiled at me, his shoulder slipping behind my back so that I was leaning halfway against him.  
"They used to pick on me and say I wouldn't get a starter because I had Mienfoo at the time." I laughed softly. "But it didn't matter… because I was going to have the perfect life and train perfect pokemon and have a perfect battle record… You know I have never lost to a gym leader before?" I rambled, distracting myself once again.  
"Oh yeah?" Tate mused. "When I was younger I was the same way, only more ambitious… I had started training pokemon when I was only ten. That's not even legal in this region, and it was because I wanted to be the strongest and the best."  
"And then what?" I whispered, my head leaning against his shoulder.  
"Well… team Plasma found me when I was fifteen; they offered me everything I ever wanted. They said I would be powerful and undefeated and I would be the best trainer that ever lived." He laughed bitterly. "I know it sounds dumb, but I really did sign my life away for that. At the time I didn't realize there was more to life than being the best."  
I looked at his sad eyes and something was tugging on my heart. It was too real to me… the idea of him being young and striving and by all means, just a kid. It was obvious that he had no clue how serious that contract he signed really was. Tate wasn't much older than me, but I hadn't officially started training until I was sixteen, and Plasma didn't become well known until a year into my training.  
"So you joined team Plasma before they were even anybody didn't you?" I murmured.  
He shrugged. "You would think that, but it was just as big a deal to Plasma themselves the day they recruited me as it was the day you defeated N. They were very good at keeping quite."  
I nodded, trying to remember the first time I had seen the Shadow triad. It wasn't like I remembered all that clearly, they were a molecule of the big picture that had been the mysterious Lord N. And now that I thought back to it, the Shadow triad was most likely half the reason he was still alive today.  
"Well, you seem to have turned out ok." I mused. "I mean… sure life isn't perfect but, you really are a strong trainer… the strongest I have ever battled." I admitted with a small smile.  
He laughed once. "Yes but if you had the right pokemon all along I wouldn't stand a chance." his chuckled broke off into silence and the sound of the waves once again. Heat rose to my cheeks as I seemed to get stuck in his silver eyes. He opened his mouth as if to say something but stopped himself, losing interest.  
I should have pulled away, I should have stopped myself from all the trauma and guilt and pain that I would have to face when it came time to give up one of the boys I loved. But something under than dull moon and cloudy sky made it impossible. Tate stalled, as if to warm me or let me have a chance to stop him. His eyes flickered to my lips as he leaned closer to me. Still I didn't move.  
My mouth twitched open a heartbeat before he so gently set his cold lips on mine. It was dramatic and drawn out and painfully perfect. I no longer could control myself, I brought my hand up and my fingers knotted in his hair, my lips were feverish then on his.  
He was excellent at kissing, no big surprise there, but it still caught me off guard. His mouth moved in gentle strokes against mine and I even felt the beginning of his tongue swiping against my lower lip. He wrapped his arms around my waist and leaned us back against he roof till he was lying halfway over me, our legs twined together.  
Gasping and losing all control, the one thing holding me steady slipped, and my foot which was pushed up against the gutter came lose. Tate obviously wasn't holding onto anything either because he slid with me. Our mouths never disconnected though as we slipped right off the side of Bianca's two story house. I wanted to scream because of that terrible free falling phobia of mine, but with Tate it felt more like flying.  
And to my surprise we never touched the hard ground below, we just teleported due to his great multitasking skills. Something soft creaked beneath me and moaned with our combined weight. It was the bed in Bianca's spare bedroom.  
Hot with extravagant kisses we broke apart. He rolled swiftly to the left, and for the first time since I had ever met Tate I saw a lapse in his perfection. There was a loud thud that I was sure would wake up the house as he slipped right off the edge of the bed and fell back down on the floor.  
I didn't have to look to know how funny his expression would have been, and the way my heart felt… so light and airy, I burst into a torrent of helpless laughter. My lips sizzled and the taste of his tongue was still tainting my mouth. I had never—not even the first time— been kissed so professionally.  
"Not bad?" Tate stood and hauled himself back up onto bed at my side. His voice sounded strange… thrilled to be exact. I couldn't believe that he was already able to speak.  
He pushed me further over against the wall and snuggled up next to my side on the tiny bed. I could feel how high his spirits were as he tucked my head into his chest and breathed in my scent smoothly.  
"You don't know how long I have wanted to do that." he whispered, holding me as gently as you would a newly laid pokemon egg. His fingertips brushed my hair back and I felt his lips at my jaw line.  
I couldn't speak. I could hardly comprehend what I had let myself do let alone answer him. All I knew was that I was suddenly unbelievably happy…  
All I knew was that I was suddenly deeply in love with Tate.


	41. Chapter 41

I vowed I wouldn't think about last night today. I swore up and down and back and fourth that I wouldn't let it distract me from what we had to do today. I was absolutely, positively not going to ruin this because of the other night.  
And yet every time I glanced at Tate his face would turn a shade darker and I would repeat the promise to myself, forcing the thoughts away and the scowl hard on my face. Tate must have thought I was mad at him… even though I wasn't.  
One moment had been impossible to avoid though. That was waking up the next morning and waiting for Bianca's parents to leave for work so that Tate and I could come out of the bedroom. Sure he could have teleported away and come back later, but neither of us suggested it. We had waited out a long forty five minutes and had even begun to fall back to sleep when Bianca opened the door to tell me she had made breakfast. She squealed in shock when she saw Tate lying next to me… shirtless.  
I had to assure her that it was an accident and that we had fallen asleep talking last night. She wasn't buying it at all, which made the subject harder to avoid. Finally Tate blurted out "We were fucking like buniery!" in his sarcastic tone, and that shut her up for a while. The look on her face told me she wasn't fond of Tate.  
But she sure was fond of Kayne. Her eyes lit up when he came over, smelling of the ocean from where he had taken Garchomp for some exercise. The huge dragon pokemon got to warm up for tonight's war, and I appreciated that Kayne was the only one who thought maybe some practice would do good. Oh though I was sure it only came from his excitement, rather than his logic.  
I sat in the summer heat on Bianca's porch as a storm brewed above my head. The thick clouds from last night had blown in from over the ocean and settled over the region. Low rumbling threatened to release the rain at any given moment.  
My Samorott looked up pleadingly at the sky, willing the water to fall. It was humid and heavy feeling. He looked hot and worried. Scrafty had a more determined look on his face, and he kept his attention turned to me, as if to ask silently more about the attack. Unfezant was perched on the railing, sleeping soundly with his feathers fluffed out everywhere. Reuniclus and Crypt seemed to be having a magnetic and telepathic conversation that was luring them closer to each other.  
You wouldn't have been able to tell, but the sun was setting already, and in just a couple hours our reign would begin. I swallowed hard and ran my hand over Samorott's neck.  
Bianca and Cheren were talking quietly to each other inside the house and the open window behind me was letting their conversation drift.  
"What happens if something goes wrong?" Bianca was worrying. "What happens if I have an asthma attack or something?"  
I knew she would never show this kind of fear in front of anyone else but Cheren or maybe me, so it made me wonder if she was really fit for this job. My mind whirled with fear.  
What if something does go wrong? What if Bianca gets hurt… or Cheren or Kayne… or Tate?  
My heart lurched and I had to force the thoughts away once more. This was impossible… this was all too much to bear. How could the five of us take on a whole castle full of grunts?  
Samorott sat up and nudged me gently, sensing my distress. I sighed and ran my hands up his face.  
"What's going to happen buddy?" I whispered. "What if something happens…"  
"Nothing is going to happen." Kayne's voice alarmed me into looking up. He appeared from the yard, holding his pokeball in his hand and his shirt sweat covered. He wiped a hand over his face and set beside me.  
"Come on, don't fret." He nudged me somewhat roughly. "Everything is going to be fine."  
"You can't know that." I muttered. "I don't know if I can take the possibility."  
He put his hand on my shoulder and raised one eyebrow at me skeptically. It was nice to see someone was eager and prepared. His white eyes glimmered, brighter than anyone else near me. "You really think Tate would be leading you into this if he thought something would happen?"  
"Kayne it's not just me!" I hadn't meant for him to think I was scared for my own life. "Its Bianca and Cheren and you!" I shook my head. "And Tate too. What if someone gets hurt? I can't live with that. This is my doing."  
"It's Tate's plan." He assured. "No one can blame you for what might happen, but it doesn't matter because nothing is going to happen… nothing except kicking some Plasma ass."  
I rolled my eyes and sighed. "You better be right." He wasn't as encouraging as I had hoped, but I didn't feel like arguing with him.  
"I'm always right." He said with a cocky shrug.  
I shook my head and snorted at him. "I swear you are turning into Tate."  
"It's a brother thing." He said more honestly. There was a flash of pride, then sadness, and then mild affection on his face. His eyes settled on the dry grass stretching out in front of us, yearning for rain. "Tate is the only person I have ever been able to look up to." he admitted.  
I smiled at him, forgetting for a second all about tonight and the chance we would be taking. "He really is a great guy." I couldn't stop the love from tainting my tone. Kayne looked at me and smirked, eyebrow kinking upward deviously he flickered once.  
"He won't let anything happen tonight." he said as he started to teleport. "I won't let anything happen tonight."

…

My heart was racing as we stood just out of range from the plasma castle, beyond the trees ninety eight floors below the place I spent about a month of my life, help captive against my own will. I swallowed hard, my small army standing beside me. Bianca was staring with wide, scared eyes. She assured everyone time and time again she was ready though, so no one questioned it anymore.  
Cheren looked conflicted, probably remembering his own time in that dreaded castle. I felt the long lost guilt in knowing that his stay had been Hell compared to mine. He had gone through twice as much pain and loss than I had. I owed him a lot for standing here with me tonight; risking his life to put right where wrong had stood for too long.  
I remembered the day I started my journey as a trainer, the first time I saw N, the night I lost Mienshao, and many more moments that were forever embedded into my brain. Thunder rolled over head, making me shudder. Somewhere in the back of my mind I could hear Mienshao herself, right beside me, ready to fight.  
Tate turned to me then, stared into my eyes. I could see every regret there in the silver depths, but also every reason to make tonight a night to remember. Tate was hungry for revenge… he had been ever since the day Plasma took his life.  
I nodded ever so slightly to him. I was ready…  
"Alright." He broke the silence and turned to the rest of us. "Bianca and Cheren you are waiting here until Kayne comes back. It wont take long either so be ready. Ready?" he looked at Kayne, who was twirling his pokeball around his neck eagerly. His eyes were vivid.  
"Ready." He nodded.  
Tate looked at him for a second, pride flashing across his face. He punched his brother affectionately in the shoulder. "Go get em Freckles."  
Kayne snorted a laugh and raised his hand to flip Tate off—the equivalent of saying I love you—before disappearing into the air.  
"He is supposed to blow that window out." Tate turned his attention back to the castle. "As soon as we see it, it's our turn." His hand curled around mine tightly and I noticed that his palms were sweaty. Whether he showed it or not he was nervous. "Ready?" he whispered.  
I nodded, not taking my eyes off the giant window that had been destroyed twice already. My heart was racing impatiently.  
This was it…  
The world seemed to be holding its breath for a very long moment. The only sound was thunder cracking again in the black sky. Tate's thumb rubbed back and fourth against my hand for a second and then stopped. I could feel all the muscles in Tate's body tighten, and with a sharp intake of a breath the window shattered.  
We watched for a split second as a huge line of blue fire shot through the side of the castle and sent a ray of ray of red across the floor. I could faintly see the pulsing of it through the crumbling wall, and the sound of the alarms barely touched our ears.  
Tate whirled and wrapped his arms around me to get a better grip. I could feel strange and frantic electricity spouting from his body into mine. I wrapped my arms around his neck and held on as tight as I could, my fingers crossed as the world flashed away from us.  
That split second of free falling didn't terrify me like it normally would have; my mind was too occupied to be accepting fear.  
We landed harshly in a red flashing metal room before I could think of anything other than the fact that this was all too real. Tate released me in an instant and yanked the two pokeballs from his belt. Disoriented I stumbled into the nearest piece of machinery and pried my own pokeballs free. I threw Reuniclus's because it was the first that I could unclip, and then launched Samorott into the world.  
Alarms blared louder than I remembered, and the sound was making my head whirl with memories. I forced it away and looked at Tate's figure, rigid with his own vengeance.  
"Reuniclus, Samorott!" I yelled over the alarms and pointed to the machines around us. "Let's go!"  
"Gengar!" Tate snarled, backing up into me and clutching my hand. We couldn't get lost down here, not if we were going to shut down the system of locks and alarms.  
The four pokemon got to work instantly, destroying and tearing things apart. I stood with my face halfway hidden in Tate's shoulder blades, trying to block out the noises and the memories of this dreadful place.  
It hadn't always been dreadful though… I had N…  
Tate's frantic hands held onto me tight. "Kayne should have gotten back in now!" I could barely hear him and he was screaming. "He should be starting the fires!"  
I nodded to let him know I had heard, but my attention was drawn elsewhere when a grunt ran down a staircase and slipped on a thick cord that Samorott had ripped apart and flung away to the entrance from above. I watched in horror as the terrified grunt, possibly as innocent as N was, slipped and cracked the back of his head open on the metal railing.  
The smell of blood clogged my nose and through the red flashing of the lights I could see thick, gushing blood pour. His limp body slid to the floor and I could see that his neck was twisted.  
My heart pounded and I looked up at Tate. His face was hard. "Not all the grunts are bad!" I screeched past my tight throat. "How many are we going to murder!"  
He didn't answer me, just held me tighter as our pokemon tore apart the walls of buttons and switches and wires. Gengar released shadow ball after shadow ball that plummeted through the hard machinery and sent a shower of metal bits flying through the air. His yellow eyes gleamed orange when the red flashed. He looked furious.  
Samorott was ramming everything and anything while sending waves of water lapping at the monitors. They cracked and shorted out while my shoes sloshing through the great puddles. The water mixed with the grunts blood and washed the slash in his shaved head clean. My stomach twisted with queasiness but I ignored it.  
From above us, even over the alarms, we could hear frantic grunts trying to get out every which way they could.  
"Froslass!" Tate wailed at his elegant pokemon who was smashing things with strength I didn't think she could poses. He pointed to a huge switch on the far wall; next to the staircase the grunt had fallen down. She danced over to it and sent a shattering blow. It dented and crumbled under her attack, and with a low groaning noise the alarms came to a stop and the red lights faded.  
Tate's hands gripped my arms tight and I felt him lean closer to me to whisper in my ear. The only sound was the sizzling and electric sparks coming from the devastated control room, and the ringing in my ears. Samorott's water attacks had the whole floor flooded.  
"Call them back." Tate barely whispered in my ear. I felt him shift and the low light of his pokeball made me able to see where my pokemon were for a split second. Froslass and Gengar retreated into the pokeballs quickly without question. It took me a moment to gather my shaking hands before I could call mine back as well. The silence was deadly.  
"I… I think the castle is shut down." Tate whispered. I was vaguely aware of the fact that a corpse was sharing the room with us. My shivered. Was it going to be trapped here forever in this hell?  
Suddenly a loud crash sounded from high above us, rattling the walls and shaking the ground. I jolted closer to Tate and tried to find his eyes in the blackness. The only thing that proved he was still there next to me, and hadn't left me to die alone, was the way he held me. Fearlessly, risking everything once again…  
Another crunching, blasting sound made the world tremble around us. Water lapped at my ankles and I knew we had to get out of here.  
"What is that?" I clutched Tate's shirt with bloodless, numb hands. I would have looked white as a ghost if I could be seen.  
"Hopefully Kayne…" I could hear him swallow, but somewhere in the back of my mind I knew that wasn't the sound of his Garchomp. It was much too big to be his Garchomp. The roar that echoed beyond the blasting was higher pitched… more… deadly.  
"What do we do?" I begged, but he was already taking action. He wrapped his arms around me again and kissed my cheek, finding it some how in the darkness. In an instant we were teleporting again.  
The landing wasn't nearly as good as it normally was, we collapsed once we hit the ground and my shaky knees wouldn't come back to help. The dark night that we had left in place of the castle was back, and the heavy summer air was broken. I looked up to find a thick droplet of water splash me in the face. The storm had finally broken through. My heart lurched as Tate pulled me upright and started dashing closer to the castle.  
I gasped when I saw it. Half of the massive tower was alight with flames, and the other side was churning with smoke and ash. I could see the top of the castle collapsed and fell to the ground. I begged that was what the crashing sound was, but a gut feeling told me otherwise.  
"Where are Cheren and Biance!" I howled at Tate, trying to keep up with him. The ground was slick and slippery, looking more like a field of oil rather than grass.  
Tate looked around frantically and then pointed. "Over there!"  
I had to look past the last layer of trees that surrounded the castle to see that a wall of fire was protecting my two childhood friends from the guards that so desperately wanted to save their beloved castle. I could make out Emboar's lumbering shape past a wall of smoke.  
Tate cursed under his breath looking up at the sky. "The rain is going to put out the fire!" his eyebrows came together and his teeth ground together.  
"Set fire to the rain." I mumbled, breathless from running.  
Tate shot me a look of confusion and I knew he would never understand. Our hands slipped apart and he sped up, leaving me within dashing distance of Bianca and Cheren.  
"I have to find Kayne!" he yelled as a heap of building came crashing down just a few hundred feet from me. Pain gripped at my chest because I didn't want to let him go alone, but I had to help stop the grunts.  
"Cheren!" I rasped, charging through licks of fire to them. A grunt tried to grab me but was blown back by Bianca's Munna with a loud wail. The small, adorable pokemon looked to be trying its hardest.  
I looked over to where Bianca was faithfully ordering Emboar to light everything on fire. She ran and ran without ever stopping to wheeze or cough, fearlessly keeping the fire one step ahead of the rain.  
"Help me fight them off!" Cheren dodged a free falling figure and ordered Munna to keep it up. Dozens of horrified people were jumping from the castle. Their screams made my blood turn to ice, and was fallowed by a blast of blue fire and some other attack I couldn't decipher.  
Something must be seriously wrong… something else was happening in there and I couldn't even begin to think of what it could be. Human beings would rather jump from a ninety eight floor building and die on impact than face whatever was going on up there. I was shaking with horror, but somehow managed to release all my pokemon.  
I faced the grunts and put my back to Cheren's keeping watch from all directions as Plasma pokemon came closer and closer.  
A rippling screech erupted from the castle, at least a hundred feet above me I could heart it clearly now. That couldn't be the scream of just any pokemon…  
My stomach flip flopped upside down as another body jumped and splattered on the ground just a little ways away from me. Blood spattered the back of my legs but I couldn't even acknowledge it. My mind was on one thing and one thing only.  
Kyurem…  
Team Plasma had Kyurem…


	42. Chapter 42

I want to thank you all so much once again for being the best readers an author could hope for. Those of you especially who took the time to comment. It means so much to me. 3 you can expect more from this story, though im not sure I will be posting it on fanfiction. PLEASE, if you want to read the sequel (which is all completed) go to my Deviantart account (no spaces) : / / - - 61 . gallery / and that will take you directly to the sequel!

THANK YOU ALL SO MUCH AGAIN~ LOVE YOU ALL

~Kayne~

All hell was breaking loose throughout the tallest floors of the tower. My heart was pounding, watching as blue toxic flames melted the walls and sent grunts falling through the floor. They couldn't escape the path of destruction from my Garchomp; they could hardly escape the regular fire coming from below.  
I watched with enthusiasm as grunts lined up, pounding on the elevator doors while trying to pry them open. The hall outside of Touko's old room was filled with smoke and screaming as me and Garchomp blasted through another wall and squared up behind them. Garchomp let out a snarl and prepared another attack in the back of his throat.  
Never before this moment had I ever felt so powerful before. I had never had the indulgence of knowing that people feared me, and I couldn't say I didn't like the feeling. It wasn't terrible… to be feared… oh though all those lives that slipped away beneath the castle crumbling around us seemed to really take its toll on someone. I ordered Garchomp with a wave of my hand to launch his dragon rage in the opposite direction from the terrified grunts. None of them were a threat and I didn't want to kill anyone if I didn't have to.  
With an in unison screech the mass of people cowering by the elevator, praying for it to open, started to scatter. Blue flames licked the walls and traveled upwards quickly, giving everyone little room to run. A few brave grunts dashed behind my Garchomp and headed for the nearest hole in the wall. I didn't stop them, though their decision to jump wasn't what I would have done.  
My chest felt tight as Garchomp prowled, eyes gleaming wildly, looking for an opening to move through the fire lit room. I had to cover my face with my shirt and hope not too many toxic fumes were getting to me. I knew it was time to teleport Garchomp somewhere else and start on a new area of the castle.  
I was about to pull up my pokeball and call him back when suddenly a terribly loud scream made me whirl. Garchomp dashed to my side and stood behind me, standing tall and waiting for his chance to strike at whatever was a threat. I couldn't see much more than ten feet or so in front of me, the smoke was too thick, so I was completely unprepared for the sudden blast to bring chunks of wall and statue at me.  
I covered my face as best I could and yelled for Garchomp to attack, not knowing just what was coming for us. My head spun with dizziness and the frantic grunts and workers nearby seemed to be losing consciousness. I caught the nearest one fainting out of the corner of my eye, and thanked my lucky stars that I was trained for this kind of stuff long ago.  
What I wasn't trained for though, was to suddenly be attacked by a monster. A huge pokemon, easily the size of Garchomp, loomed over me, its piercing blue eyes deadly. I had never seen a pokemon like this before, but the waves of freezing air wafting from it explained that it was an ice type of some sort.  
My heart nearly stopped as it opened its jaws to me and Garchomp and sucked in a huge breath.  
"RUN!" fear jabbed at me like pins and needles when Garchomp disobeyed me and lunged at the huge legendary.  
"NO!" I cried as Garchomp dove beneath the attack and slashed at the great beast's legs. It let out an infuriated, ice squealing against ice kind of sound, and snapped at my pokemon. You would have thought that it merely stubbed its toe compared to Garchomp's bellowing cry of agony.  
Icicle teeth caught my pokemon on his back fin and sent blood splattering. I could barely see, but I had enough sense to call my dragon type back. He would never stand a chance against such a pokemon, especially when he was too stubborn and arrogant to listen to me.  
I reached for the pokeball that always hung around my neck and gasped when it was gone. I whirled, a sinking feeling in my stomach as I tried to grasp the reality of this all. The smoke was making everyone around me drop, probably choking them to death right there. The blue flames from Garchomp had the walls slowly melting into soggy, steaming piles and chunks of building. This floor could collapse at any given second, and the earthquake my dimwitted pokemon created didn't help anything.  
"GARCHOMP!" I wailed in desperation. "RETREAT DAMMIT!" But he held tighter to the collapsing floor, still caught in the jaws of the monster pokemon. I was about to run forward and risk my life to try and teleport him away myself, but suddenly something clipped me on the back of the head and I fell with a thud, shock and smoke making my gaze foggy.  
Scrambling I turned to look back up at me. All I could really see was one familiar red eye looking down at me. Fury shot through my limbs and I shoved up at one of the most hated people on this planet.  
Ghetsis wasn't prepared for me to attack him; he probably never would have guessed that I would be the most misbehaved of the Shadow Triad. I used as much strength as I could muster to drag him to the ground. The mess he had made would never be worth taking his life quickly and skipping the suffering part. With a grunt I shoved his face into the floor and smeared it in the nearest blue embers.  
He screamed and kicked out at me, but was in too much shock to stop me from getting away. I lurched to my feet and turned, scanning the rubble and the smoke while I rasped for clean air.  
"GAR—GARCHOMP!" I coughed harshly, realizing now just how powerful the fumes were getting. Ghetsis was roaring back to his feet behind me, I could hear him, but I knew he wouldn't see me unless I was right in front of him.  
The sound of my only pokemon came when a weak rasp and suddenly a gust of chilly air and frost blew the smoke away. I could see while it gathered at the other end of the hall, but was too struck with what I found to do anything.  
My Garchomp… my one pokemon… the one I had raised completely by myself was pinned to the ground with the massive ice dragon over him. The talons of the pokemon ripped deep gashes into his thick blue skin and I cringed in the same moment that I short forward.  
"NO!" I grabbed the nearest piece of cement and lobbed it at the pokemons head. It flinched in the same way it would have if a piece of paper had hit it, but to my relief it turned its attention on me and stepped off my Garchomp, giving him the chance to breathe again.  
"DAMN YOU!" I grabbed another, larger piece of cement and threw it. This time it hit the massive pokemon in the shoulder. I started to back up, luring its attention from Garchomp as he was fighting for his life.  
The ground trembled and slanted with a terrible snapping sound as the weight of the creature thundered on an unstable path. The furthest wall was starting to collapse, and I could see a wall of orange flames outside, blocking the outside world from looking in at the destruction.  
"COME ON!" I screamed at the pokemon, my hands shaking with fear, my mind ready to teleport. As soon as the floor caved in I would teleport to Garchomp and we would teleport back outside…  
"KAYNE!" a familiar, horrified voice caught me off guard and I could just make out the shape of my brother as he landed swiftly in the path of the pokemon. I couldn't see his face, but I could see that he was covered in blood. The movement to release his Gengar was the last thing I saw before something grasped my leg and yanked me to the ground.  
"You dare turn your back on plasma!" Ghetsis, who I had left to crawl on jagged floor had brought me down to his level. My hands split open on the sharp pieces of cement and I felt a handful of hot embers get spattered at my face. I wailed, feeling as though acid was eating my skin right off.  
Kicking and screaming I managed to dislodge, but only in enough time to feel something terrible happen. The ground… it was breaking off, falling to pieces. I couldn't see due to the embers in my eyes, but I could hear Tate's desperate voice calling out to me.  
It must have been the smoke that did it to me… or at the very least the panic of trying to stand up to a monster pokemon alone, but I suddenly couldn't focus. I knew I had to teleport, I knew I had to find myself and force a place into my mind. I had to picture solid ground and hold on tight to my self consciousness and hope I would land ok. This was all going through my head, but nothing was changing.  
The whole floor that fell beneath me crushed the lower story with easy, but was piled up in a heap of rubble. I gasped, my vision blurring as I landed on the hard mountain of cement, wood, marble, and fire. I could suddenly feel the summer air again, and I realized that it was raining as I gasped for breath.  
Blood was gushing from a huge gash in my leg and ran down like a stream of lava would a volcano. Everything burned and hurt and I realized that this wasn't fun and games anymore. I couldn't summon the strength to teleport… I could hardly breathe, do to the massive piece of building that had landed on my chest and was crushing my lungs with ease.  
This couldn't be happening… this wasn't supposed to happen! Not to me!  
From somewhere I heard that awful squealing of the ice dragon that had nearly killed my Garchomp. A last stretch of hate and fury ebbed through my veins, but in return all I got was more pain. It hurt to be angry… it hurt to think about my pokemon that I had fought so hard.  
"Kayne!" Tate's voice appeared near me. For the first time I felt a change in moods from him, and the panic frightened me. My whole body was going numb. It took every ounce of strength to turn my head a fraction of an inch and look over to where he was working over me.  
"Kayne! No! NO! NO! NO!" Tate was wailing. What was wrong? He couldn't be that afraid for me…  
I blinked up at him as the weight lifted off my chest. I still couldn't breathe without stabbing pain in my sides. Somewhere in the back of my throat I felt a gurgle of blood rise. I coughed it out and forced my voice to come.  
"Ta—Tate…. Gar—cho—  
"Shhh, Kayne!" he ordered me and with jerky movements he yanked his shirt off and tied it around my leg. I would have protested if I could feel how much agony that caused. I was more confused than anything else.  
"You're going to be fine!" I couldn't understand. Rain drop after raindrop soaked me, but I could feel the difference when one drop stood out from the rest. It was icy and cold, unlike the warm summer drops. I tried to swallow, but ended up raising more blood to the back of my throat. Another icy raindrop fell to my cheek before I realized that Tate was crying.  
I had never seen my brother cry before...  
I wanted to ask him what was happening; I wanted to ask him why he was crying and why he sounded so afraid. Was Plasma winning? I couldn't believe it, half the castle had collapsed already and the other half was up in flames.  
The sound of the ice dragon's wail split the air, much closer now. I wanted to sit up and look around for it, but my body seemed to be missing from my mind. I couldn't feel anything.  
"Hold on Kayne." Tate choked. His hands must have been clutching mine by the pressure I felt on my fingertips, but I couldn't be sure. I knew he was going to teleport me away, he always told someone to hold on when he went to teleport… only this time it sounded different.  
This time…it sounded like life or death…

Grunts of every stature scattered at last, leaving me and Cheren to catch our breath, though this did not stop my heart from racing. Clutching at my chest with one hand, coughing out the soot filled air only to breathe in another, I trembled. The ground threatened to wobble beneath me, but I knew that it would fade almost as quickly as the fire would with the rain.  
Bianca had out done herself with Emboar. The castle was alight with flames, despite the heavy downpour that threatened to flood the fields and forest around us. I knew this was what we had been wanting and expecting out of this mission, and yet I couldn't bring myself to feel even remotely happy. To be honest… I couldn't even remember the real reason we had done this.  
The motive was still fuzzy in my mind until a pair of grunts stumbled through the rubble, their legs burned and raw. I flinched, but could see something more than pain in their eyes. I shook violently as they limped towards me, arms outstretched. Scrafty who was still in decent shape rushed to my side and stood in defense.  
"Tha—thank y—you." the female grunt choked. Something tightened in my throat and I knew that probably half the grunts that worked for team Plasma hadn't done so because they believed in liberation. Imagining just how many men and women took jobs as grunts just to support their families made my stomach ache. How many of those had we murdered tonight? How many innocent ones had lost their lives?  
I looked past the two grunts trying to thank me and could just make out in the distance, lined up in front of the trees were dozens of grunts, all bright eyed and soaked to the skin. My spirits rose ever so slightly. How many lives had we saved tonight?  
Cheren turned and looked back at me from where he stood a couple yards off. I could just make out the huge, relieved grin stretching across his face. Broken glasses and all, he managed to find his way over to me. An unexplainable emotion of sorrow and happiness twisted my heart in a hundred different directions.  
"We did—  
Cheren's rasp was cut short by a sudden whipping sound from somewhere high above us. His face and mine turned up to the black sky to see two helicopters whirling at top speed. They were news helicopters, with search lights flickering through the clouds of smoke and ash as they raced to the destruction. How many people across the region were watching this live right now?  
How many people were grieving for their lost family members? How many were cheering for joy at being able to take their hidden pokemon out once again? How many children and future trainers suddenly had hopes and dreams of becoming the best? Did the gym leaders know? Where they turning on the lights of their gyms right now? How many pokemon centers were powering up their machines at this very second?  
I looked back at what was left of the burning castle, the rubble spread across the ground, the mangled bodies, and the faces of many, many people who now had something to live for. I looked at this and fought back tears, knowing that it was over… finally everything was over.  
Cheren put his hand on my shoulder and was fallowed by Bianca, who looked superior. Her eyes were glowing with pride and accomplishment. I had to be the only one who felt miserable out of the three of us. It was a brand of foreign, quality misery.  
My hands were numb as I racked my brain for some sanity; any coherent thought to get me back to reality. I took in a shaky breath that turned into a fit of coughing and choking.  
There was a sudden screech from the castle, and that of all things, brought me back down to earth. My heart—still pounding—jumped into overtime and I was about to demand where Tate was, but he himself answered the question before it was out of my mouth.  
The former triad member dropped into the grass a little ways off. I wasn't sure how I had managed to see him through the smoke and the helicopter lights, but it was almost as if he came because I had thought about him. Relief gripped my chest, and I exhaled, not having known that I was holding my breath.  
"Tate!" I said as clearly as I could manage, and started pushing my way through the destruction to his side. Bianca and Cheren fallowed more slowly, keeping their eyes on the audience gathering.  
I saw his head flash up for a second, but wasn't close enough to notice yet the trauma that was in his silver eyes. I didn't notice what was limp in his arms yet either.  
"Tate…" I croaked again as I neared him. I could hear his frantic breathing, and suddenly all the relief turned into disaster. My stomach churned and my eyes lolled like Kayne's head did.  
"Kayne!" Tate started wailing at his brother. My heart nearly stopped, and I dashed the last few paces forward only to drop at Tate's side. He looked at me with terrified eyes as his brother- the person he would never admit to loving like family— fought his own eyelids.  
"Kayne… no!" Tate was gasping, lips quivering, hands shaking. I merely stared in horror. I did this… this was my fault.  
A whimper began to squeak out of my mouth and the tears I had been fighting back gushed like a river after snowmelt. Through the crackling of the fire, and the flapping blades of the helicopters landing, I could hear Kayne's ragged breaths become shorter. Staccato.  
There was a moment of nothing except those white eyes, always unafraid, flickering back at me. My heart was hammering in my chest, and the crowds of people, even the news reporters fleeting closer from the helicopters, grew silent.  
Thunder rolled in the distance and Kayne tried to speak, but was stopped by the blood bubbling in his throat. Tate screamed, furious and horrified and agonized. His brother blinked once more, and then his breath came to a rugged stop altogether. My heart must have stopped too… the whole god damn world stopped turning.  
"Stay with me!" Tate burst, bellowing into the night. "Don't die!" tears streaming down his face. I couldn't believe this… I was absolutely struck.  
And Tate…  
Tate thrust his hands down on Kayne's chest, begging and begging, pulsing against his brother's heart as hard as he could. His limp, blood covered body bucked under the strength, but was unresponsive. Tate tried and tried again and again, he leaned forward, pinched Kayne's nose and blew air into his lungs, or tried to…  
Blood spattered back up out of his mouth as Tate sobbed, but didn't give up. The truth pierced me like a blade. Nothing was worse than watching another man perform CPR over a helpless cause.  
And I loved him…  
I couldn't begin to think about the pain Tate must be feeling.  
Kayne had to be ok… for Tate… for everyone…  
I loved him so much…  
It had to work…  
But CPR wouldn't have saved Kayne anyways… His heart hadn't been beating for over two weeks now…  
I stared down at the corpse, thinking about the last conversation we had. I won't let anything happen tonight, he had said. I trembled.  
What a stupid promise Kayne had made! Everything had happened tonight! Anger burned in my chest for a split second before the guilt took me away. Tate's soaked and blood dripping hair clung to his determined face as he continued to try and revive his brother.  
How could I have let this happen?  
Rain, fire, blood, and tears filled the air. Everything was silently begging, whispering into the night, for Kayne to live. But no ones silent pleading rang out as loudly as Tate's did. Grief stricken, cameras rolling and all, he pushed one last breath of air into Kayne before pulling away. His jaw and neck was covered in cold blood, dripping over his chest while he faced the truth.  
Kayne was one of the purest people I had ever met. Never had he gone without helping someone or facing up to something. He was brave and fearless, a little too fearless sometimes. His heart had led him through thick and thin. He never complained, never settled for second best, but at the same time, he put up with more than most younger brothers would.  
I never realized how much of a brother he had become to me within the short time that I knew him. The genuine talks we had, the joking and making fun of each other… that was what siblings did. I realized now, all those times Tate punched him, insulted him, and even just smirked at him… it had all been out of love.  
Tate was one to show emotion in front of just anyone, but this was too much to control. The whole region was watching the former Triad member grieve. It seemed as though even the rain was grieving for him. A heart as pure and simply good as Kayne's could never have been spared. It was like the saying goes: why do the good die young?  
I thought back, back and back and back over everything that had happened since the night I fought N the first time. The night I lost Mienshao… the first good to die young. It seemed like so much had happened since that moment of grief.  
But nothing quite this bad. Nothing was worth it… nothing was worth the sorrow and pain of losing someone so close to you. I blinked through glossy, clouded eyes and somewhere beyond the living world I could see Mienshao again. She stood at the edge of the trees with the fallen castle behind her. Her face was somber as she cried out her final cry. I could hear Kayne's voice in the back of my mind as well… but as soon as I blinked it was all gone. Back to the reality that was actually Hell in disguise.  
Tate brought his silver eyes up to me. The emotion there was so naked I almost looked away. He was in so much pain…  
"I'm sorry…" I barely whispered. But nothing could make this better.  
Kayne was dead.


End file.
